DNF. I couldn't connect with this book at all and found it really hard to get into. I had high hopes for this, which is a shame.

I was excited for this book but the story ends up being underwhelming. I didn't enjoy the writing, didn't feel invested in Gork, and just felt like it was trying too hard.

Gork is a teenage space dragon who is nicknamed Weak Sauce and is nothing like his famous grandfather Dr. Terrible but must get the girl and find a planet to conquer by day's end. Some parts are hilarious and made me LOL but some of it made me eyeroll - the writing/execution just isn't there the way the premise promised. 2.5 stars.

2 Stars

DNF at 15%

This book was not my thing. I think most of my problems with this book came from my expectations. I thought this was going to be a YA fantasy about a dragon that would be cute and funny. And I guess some of that was true? I mean, it's about dragon. Past that, not really. For one thing it's an adult book, and for another this actually has a lot of sci-fi in it. Since I don't tend to like sci-fi, my struggles with reading this book began there.

I tried reading this book multiple times, but the farthest I got was 15%. I thought that the world building was mediocre at best, as it was very confusing with overly complicated names for things. I think it was an attempt at cleverness and satire, but for me it fell very flat.

I also did not appreciate the brutality and sexist nature of the world this was set in. Gork is a runt and he's characterized as the most useless, scrawny, unimportant dragon out there. He's also fawning after the most beautiful and strong dragon and it's purely a physical attraction. As I said, that sort of world is not my thing. Especially since it wasn't very fleshed out or nuanced.

Maybe this book is for you, but it wasn't for me and I didn't think it fair to either myself or the book to continue reading.

Gork is a 16yo dragon attending the Warwings military academy on the planet Blegwethia. It is Crown Day when the males ask a female dragon to be their queen and give them a crown. Gork wants to make Runcita his queen but first he has to find her.

Gork is not your typical dragon, he has a larger than normal heart and has a lot of compassion (which is bad for dragons). Apologies are illegal on Blegwethia. When situations get a bit treacherous he tends to feint.
The story goes through Gork’s quest to find Runcita and ask her to be his queen. Gork is a bit of a loser so he is picked on and bullied; his only friend is Fribby, a robot dragon hatched in an artificial egg.
Gork the Teenage Dragon is a YA Sci-Fi thriller with spaceship flying dragons whose end purpose is to take over the universe.

I haven’t read a lot of Sci-Fi and I must admit I didn’t enjoy this bizarre story filled with murder, bullying and suicide. There were a couple of funny moments between the scenes of tearing flesh and dripping and spraying blood.
2 stars because I was caught up in the bloody violence and I just had to know how Gork’s story ended.

I will leave this one for the Sci-Fi fans.

Oh Gork. This book may be a lot of fun for others, but it feel flat or was trying to hard for my taste. However, this may be a demographic issue. If I could send it back to myself in middle school, I may have loved it.

This one wasn't for me. I did not finish it. It just didn't click.

While I was intrigued by the premise, I could not get into the story. The story seemed too high-school-daze, but with the slight bonus of dragons. I hope to try again in the future, but it did not hold my attention for very long this go around.

This quirky title claims to provide an insider’s view of dragon culture, wrapped up in a teenage high-school drama wrapper. While it might have appeal to a niche audience, it disappointed me. While the premise was highly unique (dragons are actually high-tech alien conquerors with a highly complex yet superficial society), the dialogue and plot both fell flat for me. Fans of John Scalzi or Kurt Vonnegut and dragons might enjoy this title, but they would be better off rereading old favorite instead.

*I received this book through Netgalley in exchange for an honest review*
DNF @30%

I was really looking forward to reading this book. The synopsis makes it sound fun and exciting and while I thought it started out that way... my excitement was quick to abate after the 10th "scaly green ass" comment. Humans do not go around commenting or thinking about their "hairy/jiggly/firm/scrawny pink ass". It felt like whenever something was mentioned, scaly went with it -- beak, grandpa, ass, etc.

The other negative for me was how I felt I was waiting for something. I thought Gork asking Runcita to be his Queen would be in the beginning of the novel with an adventure or growth happening after that interaction, so at 30% after chasing after her for.... 15%-ish, the book felt like it was dragging. So much was feeling like extra information or even filler especially when Gork would keep thinking back to how he needed to get back to his Queen Quest. So, I was just kinda done with it.

This is not to say that there are no good parts to this book. This book is certainly creative. It starts out fun and learning about Gork and dragons put a smile on my face. This humor and all the information about this different world may just be the right thing for someone. I'm honest just bummed that this book didn't fit with me.

Gork is not your typical dragon. He's not particularly fierce and his horns are a bit lacking. But boy is he motivated to ask his crush to be his queen. Too bad the rest of the dragon cadets are in his way!

This was such a bummer - the book blurb and advertising sounded so good! I was really not into some of the main themes of the book (a lot of do this or die about things that should be consensual) and how the women dragons in the book were described and talked about (looks and body parts only). Nope nope nope.

How cool! Awesome book! Awesome concept!! Loved it!!

I love a good dragon, and when you put dragons in outer space I do a happy dance. I never thought I would see the day when I would open a book and discover a sarcastic, hormone-crazy teenage dragon. Then I found Gork the Teenage Dragon. This book is every brand of weird rolled together with every brand of awesome. It’s not weirdly awesome, it’s awesomely weird. There’s a difference.

When you read this book I encourage you to suspend all disbelief. Start with the facts: this is about a teenage dragon trying to find a queen so he doesn’t have to enter into slavery. It would be quite unfortunate in the human world if the single and lonely were all slaves (I shudder to think). Gork approaches his plight with confused desperation, softened by humor. I won’t tell you if he finds love and freedom, but I will say that his teenage sarcasm remains well intact.

I absolutely adored this book. It was funny and witty and the writing style was very engaging. I loved how the author really gave Gork a unique voice filled with humor and wit. I would recommend this book to anyone I meet who loves dragons and wants to hear about them from the prospective
Gork is endearing as a character who is trying hard to fit into a world that is defined by dangerous brutality, while he has a big heart. His grandfather, Dr. Terrible epitomizes the world Gork is trying to fit into and works to get Gork to fit that mold by any means necessary. During the course of Gork's day we learn a lot about him, his world and Dr. Terrible.

The character I liked most was Fribby, Gork's best friend, a sentient organic, robot dragon. She is willing to help him in his quest for the popular girl "Queen" he wants, although he is at the other end of popular spectrum (there are actual rankings that Gork checks throughout), but I find myself hoping that he will end up with Fribby. Fribby is fearless, quirky, death obsessed and there for Gork, not just in spite of his flaws, but because of them.

All in all, I really loved this book! It was and beautifully written!

Such a disappointment and honestly, I just don't get it. It isn't funny, it's odd and not in a good way.

How can a book about dragons go so wrong? As a huge fan of dragons, I am frustrated and annoyed. I have no idea what I just read. It's absurdism and slapstick comedy (both of which I loathe and don't really understand) and I just wasted years off my life.

REASONS THE BOOK WENT WRONG FOR ME:

• It was so irritating. I'm just...I'm so irritated right now. I totally confess I skimmed a lot so you can count this as a DNF review if you want. I got to the last page but barely.

• It's just absurd. Like you think it's about a teen dragon trying to be fierce? Yes. Well ALSO: it's set in space and there are robot dragons and dragons have robotic implants, and they were suits and capes, and drive spaceships, and there is an evil scientist dragon and...Oh, sorry? Did I lose you because you are sitting there going "HOW DOES THAT WORK???" Well, friend. It doesn't work. Look there's "weird" and then there's "mate that was better left unsaid ok".

• It's extremely sexist. It's a freaking dragon book but yeah. It's super sexist. All the female dragons ONLY POINT IS TO BE MATED WTIH. Like the whole premise is Gork needs a female dragon to lay his eggs on the spaceship ride out to a planet he'll conquer when he graduates dragon school or whatever. No joke, he's just like "omg a pretty dragon do u want to lay my eggs".

• And the whole book is so freaking sexual. Like, ok. The voice is so young/giddy/juvenile it should be like for 12+ but holy HELL I'm 99% all the references to how small Gork's horns were and how important it was to have big horns were full out innuendoes. And Gork ends up having like this acupuncturist "rubbing his horns" while he moans about how good that is and I'm sitting there like "AM I READING A SEX SCENE". I don't know what's going on. I do. not. know.

• Oh and there's this part where Gork likes a girl but his grandfather steals her. And then sends Gork a letter that is, I'm not even exaggerating, "Lol I took your girl and we are having sex on a spaceship now :)". Smiley faces everywhere. And another girl dragon gets induced into doing a mating dance (I'm not sure whether by being drugged or scientifically modified?) so yeah great let's also put sexual harassment/possible rape into this book that's supposed to be a fun comedic story about a teenage dragon.

"Because the truth is that a teenage dragon will do anything to make sure the right chick lays his eggs. Even if it means he has to die trying."

That's all the book is about. Nothing else.

• WHO IS THE AUDIENCE. Because it's all like "I'm Gork! My rating is Snackalicious and I'm a dork" in tone and all quirky and then -- the actual underlying story is very very adult.

• I mean...a brain wipe sounds good. For me. Please. Immediately.

• It's not funny. It's just...no, it's not.

• Also the repetition was mind numbing. Like the sheer amount of times the book just REPEATS ITSELF. It's 400 pages and I reckon we could've cut down at least 250 with a bit o' editing. No joke, I'll prove it. These words are mentioned:

Chick = 83 times
Ass = 261 times
Scaly Green Ass = 54 times
Horns = 191 times
Runcita = 272 times
Queen = 141 times

nUMBER OF TIMES I WANTED TO MURDER SOMETHING = 876392084

• I can actually feel my braincells dying. Which I suppose is an accomplishment.


ALL IN ALL: this book is about a dragon who wants sex. The end! The combination of dragons + spaceships just doesn't mesh in my brain at all. It doesn't work. And it was completely disgusting towards females. And the sheer amount of innuendoes is basically astounding and I feel like I just read a book that is 90% about a teenager who thinks their penis is too small. Oh and did I mention how it begins the book with insulting Tolkien? He was a "sonuvabitch" who got dragons all wrong.

Please would you stop before you offend the alphabet.

2 ⭐️ this book was a struggle to read. Seeing all the highly rated reviews it makes me wonder if it's just me who didn't like the book.

The book wording choice was annoying to me. Chicks, scaly green ass. Just unnecessary and annoying. Aside from that the book was really hard to get into. The writing didn't flow for me with all the descriptive "crack" "crash" "chomp."

The premise of the book had some hope, a dragon looking for his true love. But it was about finding a mate to mate with in high school.......
Gork has to find a mate, and go off to conquer a planet and hatch eggs. The way the book was written was very stereotypical high school cliques in a dragon world. There was nothing fresh or interesting about the plot after that.

I think the book would've appealed more if it had been written better. But to each their own, some people may really love it. It just wasn't for me.

This ebook was given to me by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

I enjoyed this book although it took a while for me to get into it. It's a fun story about a young dragon graduating from school and trying to find his queen or life partner. He's a more emotional dragon, not a quality appreciated by the dragon community, and he's trying to find his inner tougher dragon. The farther I got into the book, the more I enjoyed it. I would recommend this book for all ages.

It really is lovely to read a bit of silly nonsense every once in a while and this certainly hits the spot. I really enjoyed Gork's adventures. Hilarious and heartfelt and a little bit of romance too. Recommended.