Member Reviews

This was a very heavy and hard-going book and one which I wished I had never downloaded.
The power of likeability in a status-obsessed world is definitely something I have no time for.

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I'm so sorry I was unable to review this book, as I was writing print reviews for national magazines and didn't realise I had to share them on here. Have now learned my lesson going forward!

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Absolutely fascinating. I found myself quoting it all the time. Even though it's written by a psychologist I found the writing style accessible, humorous and honest. I loved it!!!!

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A really interesting book. Well worth a read if you're interested in stuff like this and how our childhood can affect our adult lives.

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This is quite the interesting book that provides an insight to how popularity works in the the modern society and its impact. Mitch gives different examples of how likability influences life decisions and judgments made on persons.

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Popular certainly rams is message of likeability is the key to success, not status popularity in a very accessible way. I don't regret reading it, however it was deeply reductionist and the academic side of me winced at several misuses of anthropology studies which brought out my judgy inner voice (sorry Mitch).

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I quite enjoyed this book. It was insightful, and I really liked how it was written. I've never read anything about this particular topic so it was interesting and original for me. I recommend it.

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Review to follow on blog.

Enjoyed it, but nothing groundbreaking. Full review to follow.

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I didn't really see the point of this book. A lot of the conclusions are obvious but I suppose people need to justify the actions of our peer groups

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When I started reading this book, I was unsure what the point of it was. The writing style is perfectly pleasant and easy to get along with but "nice people are popular and grumpy people tend not to be" is not exactly an earth shattering revelation! But as the book went on I found myself warming to it and getting a deeper insight into popularity and how it works, and I could see why people study it. I still think there is a little lack of clarity around some of the issues but there was one particular point which I really recognised in myself and which came as a bit of a "road to Damascus" moment - and that alone made it really worth reading!

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Popularity is not all it's cracked up to be.

In Popular, Mitch concisely summarises and brings forth decades worth of research, some of which he himself contributed in, and delivers sharp, observant, details surrounding the subject of Popularity.

As a clinical psychologist, his work and this book is a creditable source of reference for someone delving into the subject. He theorises that popularity is a natural subconscious desire. This evolutionary perspective, for me, was a particularly incredible idea- the implications of it. For one thing, how it's still something that we all care about, think about and how we still create new ways to appear more popular. But more than that, it was humbling to think that many of us have not yet mastered it

I did enjoy the book, Mitch's insights were valuable, as were the lessons and words of advice for parents. But more than that, I found his elaborate anecdotes were a creatively useful addition. Indeed, popularity plays a role everywhere- from the children's playground to office politics. The desire to be popular is one we must not be ashamed of, rather we should, like with most things, attempt to understand it. This book offers the reader that understanding.

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I enjoyed this book - it is a well written, entertaining look at what it means to be popular. The two types are addressed - status or likability. The author has researched his subject well and there are some fascinating facts and aphorisms -

"... there is no Mandarin word for 'popularity' that has the same meaning among adolescents in Western nations,"

"We can be both liked and disliked at the same time. We can also be neither."

But I didn't engage with the book as much as I did with others on similar topics. It seemed to me that the book had so much more to say than was shown and also digressed at times from areas where I was becoming engrossed. This is a personal opinion obviously as others may like the feeling that somehow this is a light skim. There is good depth when talking about status and why we are obsessed with how we compare to others.

I think this would be especially interesting for younger people who are setting out on life as there is much here to reassure those of us who were never the most popular person in school. It is worth a read for sure.

I was given a free copy of this book by Netgalley in return for an honest review.

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Overview of how children and adults become popular, and the different kinds of popularity, and the effects they have. Interesting but nothing earth-shattering.

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I struggled with this book as it seemed repetitive at times. The basic tenet being that if you are sociable and interact thoughtfully with others in a fun and meaningful way then you are likely to be a popular person. These type of self-help books tend to be quite formulaic in that they talk a lot about research which is then interspersed with anecdotes. I found the anecdotes of interest in general but some of the research I found dull. I am also always suspicious about who is doing the research and in what conditions? Plus who is funding it and do they have an agenda in doing so? There were some section on the physiology of the brain which I found hard to follow as I am not a medic so it wasn't really making a lot of sense to me.

It seems that is you are introverted and quiet, or are simply a little awkward at social situations, you are doomed to be unpopular. It all made a little depressing reading really as there was no real tangible advice in how to become popular or how to help your children be popular. And does being popular matter anyway? The implication was that if you are not popular you are unhappy but I'm not sure I subscribe to that way of thinking.

Some of the later chapters referred to experiments where people choose which things they liked. If the things to choose had 'Facebook likes' and similar already against them they were far more likely to be popular with the person choosing than if there were no clues as to what others felt. There was clear evidence that we are more likely to 'like' something if others do. I found that idea interesting and would like to see more written about this now we are all so influenced by the opinions of others via social media and the press. The BBC News publish 'Most Watched' and 'Most Read' lists on their website which doubtless influences their readers.

This is maybe a good book for a book club to read and discuss but I did find it a little dry and hard-going. I note that on Amazon.com (as opposed to Amazon.co.uk) it has 15 reviews which are all 5 stars. Either the author has a lots of fans or the American audience genuinely like this a lot compared to us Brits.

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This was a really interesting read, I'd no idea there had been so many studies on popularity! It was very easy to read, the constant references and details of studies added to the book, rather than turning it into an academic text, but nor did it feel dumbed down. Unsurprisingly, it made me reflect on my behaviour and treatment, both as a child and an adult, and I think the themes will stick with me.

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What does it mean to be popular? A leading psychologist in the field examines what we mean by popularity, explains the difference between ‘status’ and ‘likeability’ and the effects that achieving each have in our lives and puts forward the idea that desiring popularity is an integral part of the human psyche that better prepares us to live happily and fulfilled lives. He also discusses the far-reaching impact that being popular as a child can have on us in later life and how parents can influence their children’s popularity and possible future happiness. Finally, he encourages us to make efforts to attain the ‘good’ kinds of popularity in order to improve our careers, relationships and overall lives.

Clearly well-researched and analysed, Popular is a combination of research findings and anecdotes woven together to create an easy-to-read report on all aspects of popularity. It discusses how being popular can benefit us and improve our lives and also how it can negatively affect us – for example, placing too much value on concepts such as ‘likes’ on social media can lead to depression and impaired socialising. The author writes in an engaging and accessible style that avoids over-technical language and explains complicated psychological concepts in a simple to understand terms, making this book manageable for readers from a wide variety of non-scientific backgrounds. He describes many interesting experiments, including some that demonstrate children of a very young age who are identified as being likeable by their peers (and hence, popular) are more likely to do better in school, have healthier relationships and achieve more in life. Other interesting concepts touched on by this book include the idea that children may mimic their parents behaviours which influence their popularity and also the idea that popularity in the form of ‘status’ (being talked about or well-known) can lead to feelings of isolation and depression in the long term, such as is experienced by many celebrities.

However, whilst all the ideas in this book were interesting, I found that some of the conclusions put forward in this book were a little narrow-minded and, from a scientific point of view, a few oversimplifications were made with an occasional lack of distinction between correlation and causation. The author talks about five popularity ‘types’ identified in children, which is an interesting concept, but goes on to form generalisations based on them which, whilst believable, would probably not stand up to rigorous scientific testing. I also found that the concept of likeability being desirable could be interpreted to mean that an ideal world is one where everyone ‘likes’ each other – to me, this seems like it would be both dull and also defer progress brought on by debate and disagreement. As well as this, being ‘likeable’ on the surface can quite often be false or conceal a less agreeable personality within and the author fails to touch on this concept at all throughout the book.

Despite a few issues, I would recommend Popular to anyone who has an interest in psychology or is intrigued by the concept of popularity, although it may be a bit depressing to those who weren’t one of the ‘cool kids’ at school or don’t feel as if they’re incredibly popular now. Although it is not exactly a self-help book, Popular does give out some helpful advice on how to be more likeable which, whilst fairly simple, is worth keeping in mind.

Daenerys

Breakaway Reviewers received a copy of the book to review

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This is packed with interesting ideas and informtion delivered in an easy engaging style. The problem for me is that by necessity the ideas are reductionist and simplistic generalizations are formed based on effectively incomplete information. Definitely food fir thought however.

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Who knew there was so much more to popularity than just liking someone / being liked ... or not! I suppose once you start to analyse it, you find out there is a lot more to it which is what this book lays out. I don't read self help books normally but the blurb for this one intrigued me and I did find myself understanding types and situations I've met and been through myself. With each "type" you see a person you know. You can understand why some people are passed over for jobs you were sure they would get and why others with less academic qualifications may get it instead.

Many people are effortlessly popular, others have to work a little or a lot at it, some people will never achieve the level of it they want to, no matter how hard they try. Nor did I realise how one's popularity and its far reaching implications are with us from birth really and how so many life decisions are based and on it and the judgements we make on others.

Quite a fascinating book and I wish I'd read it before I had my child. Not that he's unpopular ... but I wonder had I made certain other choices regarding his upbringing so far, would he be doing even more successfully. One never knows but, as a young teen, I'd give it to him to read too so at least he's forearmed and forewarned should he wish to experiment a little with it!

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Book supplied by Netgalley for an honest review.

Mitch Prinstein’s Popular is an interesting read. It addresses all aspects of popularity – why it’s important, how it evolved, and where it can lead. I did enjoy it, and many of his conclusions are thought provoking, but at times it did feel like he was shoe-horning populism into unrelated areas. Many of the sections are driven by anecdotes, some he acknowledges are made up, and many of the others I would assume are too. My big complaint is that he starts by saying there’s five type of people (accepted, rejected, etc.), then this varies throughout the book depending on the area being discussed, and this can be affected by parents and friends. I couldn’t help thinking that some people are just unlikable – whether they’re just rude, selfish, or maybe bad hygiene, and they may deserve to be unpopular based upon their choices. Still, some interesting points, so a solid 4*.

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I enjoyed this interesting book which looked at the different types of popularity (one good, one not so good), why we often aim for the wrong one, and why people seek one but not the other but are ultimately unfulfilled. There's some interesting information about other cultures than America/UK and everything is backed up with references. The theory that one's popularity is rooted in one's teenage years can be devastating for the less popular; however, the author discusses ways in which one can work to be more likeable and gain popularity, so it's ultimately a positive book.

I've now added links to my reviews on Shiny New Books and my own blog ...

I will be doing a longer-form review for Shiny New Books and will post the link up here when that's published.

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