This was a thought provoking, intense read. Alex is in a coma, assumed brain dead following a climbing accident, yet the story is told by him, and we see and feel what he is experiencing. I was willing Alex to wake up the whole way through and wondered how his "accident" had happened. I had no idea how the story was going to end, and I thought it was really well done - I had no idea who was responsible and actually had my hands to my face when it was all coming to light! I loved the relationships between Alex and his girlfriend and his family - they seemed very real. The descriptions of people and events are vivid, accentuating the other senses as Alex can't properly see people, which adds to much of the tension. A great read to start the year, and one I recommend. Thanks to netgalley for the advance review copy.

Alex is in a coma, in a vegetative state, living only through liquid nourishment fed through a tube and a breathing tube in his trachea. At least, he *was* in a coma, now his brain function is pretty fully restored, except that he can’t get his brain to transmit commands to any part of his body, so he is powerless to let anyone else know that he can hear, feel and understand – and sometimes even see, though shapes tend to be dim. But his sense of smell is working just fine and he is able to identify visitors to his room through the sounds they make and the way they smell.

Alex then, has locked in syndrome. Not an especially new thing for a crime book, I have read others, but I must say that this one is done very well indeed.

Everything we know, we know from Alex or from the things his visitors say to him when they come to the hospital. We are fortunate, then that Alex used to be a journalist with the Bristol Post, and even now, after 2 years in a hospital bed, he still orders his thoughts as if he were writing a story for the paper.

He was injured in a rock climbing fall, though he doesn’t really remember much at all about the accident. His mind struggles to piece together events in his life and we understand his story through his recollections of memories and from flashbacks as well as what he hears from those who visit. Sometimes the visitors are talking to him; sometimes they talk to each other, or themselves.

It’s quite a sobering thought, listening to Alex describe his care regime and the different attitudes of his doctors, caregivers and even the local cleaner, and how they treat him when they believe he has no awareness and (wrongly) believe that he can feel no pain. I thought this was an especially strong element to the book and something that could have been dull was vividly brought to life here by Emily Koch in an original and quite startling way.

The central characters in Alex’ life and his regular bedside visitors are his father, his sister Philippa, his live in partner Bea and her parents, and their friends Rosie, Tom and Eleanor.

Bea has stuck by him all this time, despite the fact that she and Alex have had ups and downs in their relationship, but Alex is aware that with no signs of improvement it will soon be time for them to seriously consider withdrawing from treating him if he gets another serious infection, and in his head he is reconciled to that fate, thinking it is only right that Bea should be allowed to live a full life.

Except that it becomes clear that not everything is as he thought it was. Perhaps his accident was no accident at all. He learns that the police are re-investigating; apparently there is ‘new information’.

At the same time Bea is feeling stressed and receiving hang up calls. Sometimes she thinks she is being followed. Alex is determined to try and break through his condition so that he can look out for Bea and piece together every scrap of information he can garner to make sense of what is going on.

There’s a striking counterpoint between what has happened to Alex and the consideration of his treatment or otherwise, and the fact that Alex’s mother died of cancer and that Alex was the one his mother trusted to make sure the family understood that she did not want to undergo further treatment. This gives more depth to the story and the characterisation and allows the reader to feel an emotional pull that is stronger than I expected.

There is a hefty tension throughout the book but alleviated by lighter moments as the plot twists and turns towards a very striking denouement.

Koch pulls the story together very well and manages to keep the reader interested and engaged right up to the end. I liked this a lot more than I thought I might, and that is because the writing really delivers on this format.

Bravo, Ms Koch, you nailed it. A stunning debut.

Can you imagine what it would be like to hear people talking around you while assuming that you can’t hear them? The idea scares and intrigues me. I guess I would like to know what people say about me when they think I can’t hear them. At the same time, I am terrified because I don’t know what I’d find out. What if the people that I consider as friends say mean things about me? I know they probably do but I would rather pretend that they don’t.

Well, this is Alex’s story. He is in a coma and can hear everything around him. His sense of touch and smell are also still active. However, people around him don’t know this. They think that he can’t hear or feel anything. Alex ended up in a coma after a rock climbing accident. While in the hospital, he overhears something that makes him realize that his accident was actually an attempted murder.

The whole story is narrated through Alex’s POV which is interesting. It is crazy just how freely people talked around him including the nurses. At some point, I started wondering why people were having so many conversations around him. Honestly, it seemed like his friends and relatives couldn’t wait to get to his bedside to discuss him and the accident/investigation. I guess it makes sense in a way although it was a bit convenient. Don’t get me wrong though, I did like the concept. Sometimes, it is easier to unburden ourselves to people who aren’t really there. That is why people keep journals, write letters they don’t intend to send and make graveside confession. So the idea was definitely thought-provoking and in a way, realistic.

What I liked most about this book was the suspense. I had no idea who the villain was. It was hard to guess especially since there were no clear motives and the victim had a head injury and couldn’t remember the incident. The book also had a creepy vibe. The idea of Alex being the only one who knew that his senses were alive added a tense, creepy feel to the story. I knew that the killer was probably one of the visitors but couldn’t guess who it was. Needless to say, the reveal was unexpected and I definitely enjoy all the twists and turns.

If I Die Before I Wake by Emily Koch is a slow-burner. The premise is original and interesting. However, all current events take place in the hospital ward and the narrator is in a coma hence slowing down the pace. Nevertheless, as I have already mentioned, this was a riveting read. I liked Alex’s character and I think the author did a brilliant job crafting his persona. I was able to connect and sympathize with him. There were moments when his situation got so tense that I could feel my heart racing as I turned the pages. Alex really was a compelling narrator.

If you enjoy a good mystery with an interesting premise then this is definitely for you.

If I Die Before I Wake is a spellbinding psychological thriller. The frustration of being fully aware of everything that's going on whilst being completely paralysed is soul destroying.

Alex is a reporter with mountain climbing as a hobby. There is a glimpse of his home life with his girlfriend Bea, just before their world is turned upside down.

He wakes up in a hospital hooked up to medical equipments and surrounded by his family who believes that he is in a coma. He can feel and hear everything, but all his muscles are paralysed, leaving him incapable of communicating.

It looks like he had an accident during his latest climb. His father, his sister and Bea are regularly by his side, trying different tactics to rouse him. His brain is very active and the lack of physical response makes the situation impossible. Despair all round!

Bea has found a letter which makes her question their relationship, but Alex is baffled by the misleading content. It becomes apparent that someone is out to get him. Who? It's a real mystery and as the story evolves, he starts to piece things together, until he eventually comes to a plausible conclusion. He realises that he, and those he loves are in danger. The problem is that he can't warn anyone of the impending danger and he is at his wits end. Bea too realises that something doesn't tie up, but are they too late to stop any further damage?

This story is narrated in Alex's POV and is very well articulated. The family dynamics and their agony are projected realistically. The hospital environment and the different approach from each staff member are very well portrayed. Watching Alex going through all the different emotions is agonising. Whodunit? That question remains a constant right to the end when the puzzle is solved. It's a poignant story that kept me on edge from beginning to end. A great debut for this author.

I was kindly issued with an eARC and the views expressed are my personal opinion.

WOW! What a very different powerful story! It's told by Alex who is in a coma. He had a climbing accident. As he lies in his hospital bed he is aware of everything going on around him. He can hear but not communicate! Read on for a brilliant thriller as Alex tries to find out if someone tried to kill him, before its too late!

This book is very different. The narrator is in a coma but he can hear the conversations around him.. A clever concept for a book

The description of this book drew me in and I don't think that I've read a book like this before.

The main character of this book is Alex, and everything is told from his perspective lying on the hospital bed in a vegetable state trying to piece together what has happened to him from the bits of conversation that he catches from his visitors.

We find out that Alex was in a climbing accident and he wasn't wearing a helmet; he was stabilised after his accident but put into a coma to help him heal but he never recovered, everyone around him thinks he is unresponsive but he can sort of see and hear everything that is happening around him. His family cling onto the hope that he will come around and his girlfriend Bea fights for him and tries to find out what happened to Alex and how he fell.

The books pacing was fairly slow and I did find myself speed reading at some points as I just wanted to find out what really happened to Alex. I certainly didn't expect the "killer" to be who it was but it is explained clearly so you do understand why they tried to do what they did. This book did help pass the time on my journeys to work though and you could see what was going to happen to Alex by the end of the book. A recommended read if you like mysteries.

Alex is in a coma after a climbing accident. He can hear all of those around him as they come in and out of his hospital room, though no one believes he can hear, see or feel anything. He is all alone with only his thoughts for company.

Alex's girlfriend Bea and his Father and Sister cling on to the hope that he might wake up one day. But try as he might, Alex cannot get them to notice that he is already awake and listening to everything they say.

Others around Alex seem not as concerned with his current medical state, but more as to how he ended up there.

For it seems that his fall may not have been accidental after all.

As he lies listening to those he loves come and go, Alex tries to piece together the evidence to discover what truly happened that fateful day.

He also must resign himself to the fact that Bea should be starting to move on with her life, away from him.

She can't continue to wait for Alex's recovery when the doctors are so sure that there is very little chance of one.

But Bea is a huge part of Alex's history, and if she gives up on him, will he ever truly discover what happened to him? And when all is said and done, does he really want to know?

What an extraordinary book. Alex is still in a coma after a climbing accident two years ago and the story is told in first person by him. I was shocked to discover that all his senses are on high alert but he can't speak and is totally paralysed so he was no way of communicating with the doctors or his family & friends. He knows everything that is going on around him. How scary is that? The tests are not revealing any brain activity so he's declared in a vegetative state. He knows he's being considered for removal of his food pipe and they have given up on him. How scary is that too? It reminds me of reading about a man called Richard Marsh who defied all medical knowledge and managed to recover from locked-in syndrome. The only difference was that he learnt to indicate his needs by blinking. In an article about him he described the frustration of knowing what was going on but appeared a hopeless case. A beautifully written book with sensitivity and humour as we learn what Alex's life was like before he became imprisoned by his body. A moving ending. Thank you to NetGalley and Penguin Random House UK. I shall post this to Amazon and my blog.

An interesting idea of finding out what happened to him in retrospect through a person in a coma, who everyone thinks can see or hear nothing.

This was one thriller of 2018 which I knew I HAD to read, the synopsis drew me in immediately, and it was a great read.

However, although the plot sounds thrilling, it's not exactly unique, in that similar book plots exist in The Lovely Bones etc. However, the fact that the narrator here is 1. Male - I find less narrators, in general, these days are male, especially if written by a female author. 2. In a coma - I feel as though most books with these Victim observing the world they have left behind plots are set from the beyond, but this book has the victim in a coma when the book opens.

Now, although this plot has the original viewpoint of Alex narrating the story from a coma, this does hurt the pacing of the story, overall. Because events of the story have to be related to Alex's hospital bedside, in order to have him observe and narrate. This is the problematic part of the book, as the pacing is, possibly, the most crucial part of a thriller and really effects the readers experience. I honestly think this could have been solved completely with alternating chapters, with a different point-of-view. This could have allowed us to experience more of the characters and to avoid stretching out the plot too much.

In terms of writing, I found this particularly well done, especially for a debut novel. The way that Koch was able to convey Alex's pain led the reader on an emotional journey, this book was the definition of intense, and if it wasn't for the drawn out plot then this read would have been a 5-star for sure. I'll definitely be looking out for Koch's next book!

If you're looking for a great read in 2018 from a new author, I'd recommend you pick this one up!

Full Review Here: https://thereadingruby.blogspot.com/2018/01/if-i-die-before-i-wake-by-emily-koch.html

I really enjoyed this book. The plot is so simple as in its from one guys prospective in one setting but it took you to so many other places all from his mind. It had so many layers and kept my interested, so much I read it in one sitting! I was slightly disappointed by the end as I was rooting for Al so much but oddly enough it was the only ending it could have or it would of made the whole story not seem so intense.
Happily recommend to my friends.

Emily Koch's debut novel is a well written innovative read that will definitely pick up many 5 star reviews. However, for me, the novel was too drawn out and limited in its scope and didn't grab me as much as I had hoped it would.
The narrative is told from Alex's point of view, a 27 year old male, who is now in hospital, in a coma, recovering from a climbing accident. Or was it an accident?
Although Alex can't speak, move, or see very well, he can hear what is going on around him, and over the course of the book we hear snippets of conversation from his wife Bea, his sister, his father and various friends. The problem though is that we do not get inside these characters. We don't even know what they look like. We cannot even feel their gestures or glances, as we see everything from Alex's point of view, as he lies in his coma.
We learn quite a bit of back story which all leads up to the accident (or not) and the inevitable conclusion.
Whilst I enjoyed this read it did not grab me and to be honest, was a struggle to finish, but it IS different and Ms Koch is a very very good writer. I will certainly be interested in reading what she does next.

I was drawn to this book as I once had the unpleasant experience of waking up to find myself able to hear everything but totally unable to open my eyes, move, breathe, or speak following a failed general anaesthetic - until the antidote kicked in and I shouted "I'm here!". A small taste of what Alex is going through, but it had a huge impact on me (and still does).

Given the above, the horror of what Alex was going through engaged my total sympathy throughout the book. The tension is kept up throughout, as we (the reader and Alex) initially think that Alex has had an accident - but it gradually becomes apparent that all is not as it seems.

I am not going to give away the plot, but this is a finely written, gripping drama with well crafted characters whose behaviours are very believable in the circumstances. I never gave up hope, though guessed the twist.

My thanks to the publishers and NetGalley for allowing me to read this as an ARC in return for my honest review.

I was really looking forward to reading this book but, sad to say, I just couldn't get into it at all. I have struggled on for as long as I can but I'm just not connecting with it.
I'm sure plenty of others will enjoy this, but the storyline is leaving me cold and I'm giving up on it - something which I do very rarely.
I'm sorry that I don't like it, but honesty is the best policy!

What’s interesting about the way the author has planned the story out is the way the intent is within reach, however it doesn’t become really clear until closer to the end.

Alex likes the thrill of climbing and is perhaps guilty of becoming complacent with his safety, which is probably how he ends up in a coma after a serious fall. His head injury leaves him in a terrifying situation. Alex can hear and feel everything around him, but is unable to respond to anyone or anything. A nightmare scenario.

The medical condition is based on a pseudocoma also known as Locked-in syndrome, minus the blinking and vertical eye movements, although Alex is often able to see through the slits of his slightly opened eyes. Koch has clearly done a lot of research on the subject, which is reflected in the story.

The story is narrated by Alex himself via his inner dialogue and thought processes, and the one-sided conversations he has with his family, friends and the medical staff.

He has no memory of how he fell, and as the story progresses questions arise about the details of the accident. Was it more than just a careless incident? Did someone help Alex fall, and why?

The perspective of the possible victim is what gives this story a high level of suspense. The reader knows that Alex can’t help himself in any way, regardless of what he remembers or discovers about his accident.

Kudos to Koch for the ending, and for not feeling the need to bow down to the candy floss brigade of happy endings. It’s poetic injustice in a screwed up fictional kind of way.

Alex is lying in hospital in a 'locked-in' state following an accident two years earlier It doesn't look like he is going to come out of it and his family are debating having his life support withdrawn. He doesn't respond to various tests and the hospital believe he can't see, hear or feel anything. However Alex can hear and see but is unable to communicate. . The story is told from Alex's perspective. From bits of conversation around him he gets the idea that his climbing accident may not have been an accident .but a deliberate attempt on his life and that the Police were now investigating. He hears snippets of conversation but can't ask questions or try to explain anything.

I was intrigued by the description and liked the idea of this book.. I really wanted to like it. The writing itself is not bad however I lost interest mainly because nothing much happens in the first half of the book. It's really a monologue consisting of Alex's thoughts. I struggled on until I had read about 58% of the book and I've given up at this point (for now). I find I don't care about any of the characters.

I'm writing this on the last day of 2017 and I just can't face plodding on. It's just not for me. Other readers may love the book.

I'm sorry I haven't been able to finish it at the moment.

Written from the perspective of Alex, a young man who is in a locked-in state following a climbing accident this book expertly relates the changing emotions he feels over several months as he lies in his hospital bed unable to move, see or speak. During this time we hear of the visits he receives from medical professionals, friends and family - and others who he cannot place. His senses are on full alert and he comes to recognise his visitors from the fragrances they wear, the sounds of the different shoes they wear and the voices of the nursing staff who tend to him - some more kindly than others. He hears the conversations they have as they sit and talk about his condition and how life is continuing without him actively taking part.
One person who visits him causes him concern, as he cannot place their voice or scent in order to identify them. Are they a doctor or some other type of clinician? Alex cannot decide. Things take a further sinister turn when visitors start discussing the police investigation into the fall which put Alex here in the first place - but how can Alex let anyone know what he has heard when he cannot even move his eyes let alone talk? As far as the doctors and the tests have shown Alex is unresponsive.
The discomfort of day to day nursing care are very well written and the feelings of hope and despair which Alex goes through over the months are understandable and credible. I have to admit that I missed a vital piece of information in the story as I was reading and had a major moment where things clicked into place towards the end as things drew towards their conclusion.
The closing scenes were sensitively written and I felt suited Alex perfectly.
It is hard to believe that this is the author's debut novel and I will be looking out for her as a rising star in the coming months.
This review will feature on my blog www.sandiesbookshelves.blogspot.co.uk in the first week of Jan 2018

The blurb promises an unforgettable narrator and I feel that coma patient Alex is definitely that. Alex is attempting to solve the mystery of the climbing ‘accident’ that has put him in a coma while his relatives are deciding his future. The story is told through his thoughts and the conversations of visitors to his hospital room that he hears. It was a very effective method of narration but it did feel a little contrived at times. I was trying not to imagine myself in Alex’s circumstances but I did consider how I would have reacted if I were one of the family facing the decision of whether to continue life support. I do like a novel that has me asking myself tricky questions.

I don't think I have the words to explain how much this book has affected me.
I read it straight through willing Alex to get that little movement to let people know he is locked in his own body.
I finished it ten minutes ago and I am still crying.
Fantastic book, written as well as any I have read this year.
Thank you NetGalley for the pre publication copy. Thank you Emily Koch for your genius.