This story was emotionally intense, and the sexytimes (I like the term, don't judge) were really, really satisfactory- the chemistry between the characters was ridiculously insane so that helped, too!

There was also some very nice secondary characters- okay, there were two characters that were kind of present (outside of Jessen's brother Matt), but they were great, so that's it.

Look, I know here on Goodreads people love to hate on instalovey stories, okay? Personally, I'm not bothered by them in general. Sometimes, it just happens; there's that instant, inexplicable connection, and who am I to judge? Each individual feel in a different way, with different intensity, so I wouldn't outright deny the possibility of the existence of that kind of feeling. I have a point, I promise; this story felt a lot like instalove for a considerable part of the development. The back and forth in narrative didn't exactly help that case. But eventually, I have to admit I was actually sold on the idea, I did believe the characters and their relationship. I bought it, plain and simple. Call me naive, whatever.

Okay, if I liked it so much, why not 5 stars then? Short and simple, even if the instalove-like thing wasn't bothering me, what did bother me was the repetitiveness in the narrative: I got kind of fed up with reading about how hot Jessen was, and I cringed every time I had to read "the blond one" or "the tallest one" or such. Quick tip from a crappy writer whose experience doesn't go much further than widely-ignored fanfic: you gave your characters names, you chose those names because you liked them, because they spoke to you, because... Whatever reason. Your characters have names: USE. THEM. I imagine that authors who have kids don't go yelling around the house calling for "my eldest" or "the middle kid" or "my baby child" or call them by their hair color, height, skin tone or whatever other physical feature. NO. Then don't do it here either. It's awfully distracting.

So yeah, a thing or two bothered me. But still, the story in general kind of blew me away so it's stil a pretty solid 4-star thing! Can't wait to read more of this author!

Ummm, I couldn't really tell if this was a romance, or simply erotica with a good bit of mental badminton over a very short-lived past desertion.

I found it pretty difficult to get into the story to begin with, as instant infatuation immediately seemed to turn into insta-love.

Plus, the wording wasn't flowery per se, but it felt right on the cusp to me, which I found distracting. That tendency seemed to dissipate a bit as the story progressed, or maybe I had just gotten more used to it, I'm not sure.

I wish those extra words had been used to explain the *precise* event, laid out with full detail, which caused Jessen to abandon Ian in favor of continuing to tour with his brother. As explained, I was left with many more questions than answers.

The steamy bits were well-written and very hot; however, I got that they were hot, beautiful, gorgeous very early on in the story, so I didn't feel the need to be told again on nearly every single page. I was already sold on the physical descriptions.

I'd have to rate this novella at slightly under 3 stars, mainly for the physical sparks between the MC (aka the 'sexy times'), as there were very few specific detailed examples of events from their past that had made them who they were, deep down.

This was my first Xio Axelrod read and I thoroughly enjoyed this short book. It's a story of first love, heartbreak, forgiveness and second chances.

Ian is a prodigy and at only 26 he's well on his way to a tenured professor. He had it rough growing up and with him beginning college as a young teen, he hasn't quite fit in with everyone else or made friends easily. He's 19 when he first meets Jessen - a bass guitarist in a band that also has his twin brother as lead vocalist. Jessen is 21 at the time and he instantly feels a connection with Ian, who is there filming the band for the university. Their meeting is sweet and we get flashbacks of how they took things slow (well, if you call a few dates slow) and how their relationship developed. There was no denying that they grew to love each other in a short period of time. However, Jessen ends it all with a note slide under Ian's door simply saying "I'm sorry."

Fast forward 7 years and Ian sees Jessen at a party his friend is throwing. He hasn't seen the guy in all those years and he both hates Jessen for what he did and loves the fact that he's there. Ian doesn't forgive Jessen right away though and we're taken on a brief journey to them rekindling their relationship.

My only complaint is that the ending didn't feel like it really had a conclusion - it was just left open ended once they decided to give things a chance. I would have liked to have seen an epilogue that showed how things were developing months down the road.

Otherwise, this was a really great read that had just the right amount of emotion and hot sex.

Fast Forward, An Alt Er Love Novella, Xio Axelrod

Review from Jeannie Zelos book reviews

Genre: LGBTQIA

This is a short read at just 123 pages, and I usually avoid anything novella style. They rarely hold enough emotion for me, but it sounded very promising from the synopsis so I went for it ;-) and loved it. 

Ian is 26 now and yet still feels like a teen. I often wonder about child prodigies like him, we hot house them, push them into academic positions they aren't mentally or emotionally ready for, and on top of all that poor Ian had a pretty crappy family background.
No wonder he's kind of naive, a little insecure, feels so alone, apart from the crowd. He is. And that's so sad. How can anyone manage to breach that gap we created in the interests of "education" 
Gah, education comes from more than just books, and bright kids will always find their way, they don't need to be pushed in with those far older than them....and that's my soapbox rant for the day!! 

Ian's so lovely, a loner, but has a couple of good friends who seem to look out for him, such as Siv, giver of the party where he meets Jessen again.
Arrghh, I could feel just how that hurt him, disturbed him on a visceral level, how angry and upset he was.
Right then we didn't know much more than they'd had a relationship and Jessen left. Suddenly. Without explanation. Just was there one moment, gone the next. 

Poor Ian, already fragile, this just about fractured him and he's struggled to trust anyone since. What should he do now? Why is Jessen here? Does he even remember him or was he just a rock-stars hiccup, a quick hookup for that town and now he's off to the next. Were all the words and plans were just promises to draw him in?

I loved Ian so much I was angry at Jessen and couldn't bring myself to like him for at least the first half of the book, but his honesty, his openness and transparency about his mistakes, and what he wants now drew me in. He was so gentle with Ian, so careful not to hurt him, knowing this was a one shot chance that I couldn't help loving him too. 

Its rare for me to feel so emotionally drawn into a short novel but this one did it, had me hooked, feeling Ian and Jessen were so real, and wanting things to work out for them, for true happiness for both.
There's not a HEA, there's not really time, but the way it ends I was pretty sure they would get there and it worked for me. 

Stars: five, a novella that managed the almost impossible for me, a great story and characters and some very real emotion. 
ARC supplied for review purposes by Netgalley and Publishers

This steamy romance novel was a thrilling reading adventure, spanning from past to present, with deep connections that did not waver in seven years apart, but I am curious about feedback from men with actual lived experience of relationships with men.