This book is soft, kind, meditative. It is perfect for a grieving individual to be able to move through it at their own pace, whether that is in the order of the book or by finding the word that is meaningful at that moment. I would absolutely give this as a gift to caring professionals (nurses, mental health practitioners, etc) who frequently work with those who are grieving.

I received a copy of this book from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

My beautiful, sweet, kind, generous mother passed away a little over a month ago. It's hard to believe the Earth is still turning without my mom in it! Occupying my mind by watching movies or listening to music is like stepping into an emotional minefield, so I decided to turn to books. Looking through the long list of books on grief is overwhelming. I knew I was looking for something specific, but I didn't know what that specific thing was. I'm fortunate that The Alphabet of Grief managed to separate itself from the pack, because it ended up being exactly what I needed. From the introduction: "Most don’t want a treatise on grief. They don’t want to be educated, particularly, and they certainly don’t want platitudes. They want a few simple thoughts or images to hold on to, a few stepping-stones across the river of sadness. The Alphabet of Grief was written for this purpose: to offer simple but thoughtful reflections to ease the isolation and loneliness of grief." I'm not ready to follow all of the advice yet, but the author reiterates that's okay; there's no timeline. Even so, it was helpful to add the tips to my "mental toolbox" for later use.

Andrea Raynor is a United Methodist minister who has worked as a chaplain and spiritual counselor for over two decades. She served as a chaplain to the morgue at Ground Zero in the aftermath of the September 11th attacks. Her book centers on Christian belief, but I was able to relate to her writing even though I'm not religious. She has experience working with a diverse group of people and her empathy shines through in her writing. The few parts that were outside of my experience were easily translatable.

The book is filled with advice for working through grief one tiny perspective change at a time, as well as personal stories from the author and the people she counseled. The wide variety of experiences was helpful to me because I would've had a hard time getting through a book that was entirely about my specific type of loss. At 144 pages with 26 short chapters, it's ideal for someone who's having trouble concentrating. Each chapter deals with a different element of grief. I read this book from cover to cover, but I think it would work especially well to read relevant sections when needed. The chapters on "Ghosts" and "Treasure" were especially meaningful to me at the time I read the book. I was also touched by the "Quilt" chapter because creative expression has been an important coping mechanism for me. (It's been especially cathartic to work on framing and finishing my mom's cross-stitch projects.) The chapters all end with an Affirmation and Meditation. Here's an excerpt from the "Everyone Else" chapter:

My two big takeaways from this book are:
(1) Sometimes it's hard to let go of the pain because it feels like it's our last connection with our loved one, but that couldn't be further from the truth. We potentially see parts of them every day in the mirror, in our mannerisms, the stories we share, etc. This was so important for me to read. A few days ago I had what felt like my most "normal" day. It felt like a whole new loss and I felt desperate to get that intense emotion back. It was comforting to know that it's a common feeling and to be offered a new perspective to consider.

(2) A great way to honor our loved ones is to live on and share their stories.  Continuing to live our lives "with courage and hope" is a tribute to them.

There were so many quotes that were meaningful to me—too many to scatter throughout my review—so I saved them all in the "Quotes I Liked" section below. It was a small comfort to read this book during a time when there's little comfort to be had. It helped me see a small glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel. I think it would also be a good book for someone who wants to help a loved one through a difficult time, particularly the "Everyone Else" and "Sayings" chapters. Thank you, Andrea Raynor!

"The Alphabet of Grief" provides time-tested and helpful advice for anyone dealing with loss or tragedy. Walking through the letters of the alphabet, the author allows the reader to stock their grief toolbox with ideas, tips, and strategies for coping with the the inevitable loss we all must eventually face. The book can be read straight through or as stand alone chapters. It would make a great resource for anyone in bereavement work or for someone just looking for a little consolation and encouragement.