Someone That I Used To Know is about how one person, one family and even one community deals with sexual violence. Ashley and Derek’s relationship is forever marred by rape and the whole book basically lets them work out how they can survive it and the ramification of the crime itself within the community. The chapters switches back and forth between the past and the present and it does detail the events leading up to the crime and the aftermath, even after two years. There is no insta redemption for Derek and the book also realistically portrays how hard it continues to be for Ashley. It does feel very heavy on the emotions but still well written.

This book was so hard to get through in the best way. My heart hurt for Ashley and her family throughout the book. This was a rare look into a family’s life after sexual assault. You never really think about the impact a sexual assault has on a family, usually only on the victim. It is incredibly important, and so well done. This book will stay with me long after finishing it.
* ARC provided by NetGalley and the publisher in exchange for an honest review. Thank you!

I started and finished Someone I Used to Know by Patty Blount in one sitting. From the moment I started it, I couldn’t help but be captured by the way this author was able to grasp a subject as delicate as rape. Blount was able to form a story of a young girl who was raped by her brother’s football teammate into a gut wrenching story line as well as an informative narrative to potentially help readers going through the same trauma.
Not many authors are able to write a rape story without sugar coating it, meaning that they either have the rape victim heal from one chapter to another or get into a relationship with another person so quickly that the reader is left wondering how this could be possible. Blount on the other hand had me going through the five stages of grief with the character of Ashley; she made me feel profound sadness that someone you believed you could trusted could do something like that to you and despair that her brother was not on her side from the very beginning. But at the same time, she also made me feel so above and beyond angry that the justice system is so corrupt that a rape case would get a slap on the wrist.
I could go on and on about how much I loved this book, how much I loved the exploration of a family breaking down by what happened to one of their own but I also fell so above and beyond in love with the character of Sebastian who is seriously everything a man should grow up to be.

Patty Blount did an amazing job with this book and I can sincerely say that I feel all the better for having read and learned so much from it.

Thank you to netgalley and the publisher of this book Sourcebooks Fire for an advance copy of the book for an honest review.

"Someone I Used to Know" by Patty Blount is not just a wonderfully written novel but a very important one. As a survivor myself I have not read a book that is as accurate as this novel is. Ashley is a fourteen year old excited to start off her Freshman year, not just because she wants to be in highschool but because she wants to be able to bond with her brother Derek. Derek is a football player who is tired of his baby sister and has been for a long time. The were once really close but not so much now. One day a stupid, dangerous game that the football team loves to play ruins not only the relationship between the brother and sister but it also changes Ashley's life.

The Bengals (the high school football team) participate in a scavenger hunt that terrorizes the girls in school. The boys get points for the various sexual activities they complete and Derek is more than ready to participate. So is the captain of the team Vic who happens to have "Sex with a virgin" on his list and he knows the virgin he wants is Ashley.

This book is not an easy book to read. It leaves us to question ourselves and the world we live in. It shows that survivors are not only the people that are raped but their friends ad families as well.. It talks about healing and how hard it move on from the terror and pain survivors go through. Patty Blount really explains what it feels like to be a woman. How scary it is to walk to your car alone after dark. How sometimes just standing in line makes you a victim as some jerk behind you will grab you and think it is funny. She discusses through her characters how we live in a world of rape culture and how it is everywhere we go. We see Derek grow and change as he finally, after two years begins to work through the things that happened leading up to and after his sister's rape. We see Derek grown and become a real man. Blount also does a wonderful job with Ashley as she deals with the horror,PTSD and life in general after a rape. She is a strong, brave character who refuses to accept that she should live like a victim. Ashley is a fighter and we love her for it.

This is the perfect book and it has been released at the perfect time. The Me Too movement has finally brought rape culture to the forefront and this book is the perfect book to help others understand what it is like.

#Negalley #SourcebooksFire #Pattyblount #Someoneiusedtoknow #metoo

Someone I used to know is a good book about what happens after sexual assault. Many teens and their parents should give this book a look because it has an important message in it. Additionally, I think it can be quite eye opening for any teen!

I was excited to have the opportunity to obtain an Advanced Reader Copy (ARC) of this book through NetGalley.

Ashley and her football player brother Derek have always been the best of friends until he enters high school and decides that having a little sister following him around isn’t cool. He distances himself from her and starts referring to her as Ash Tray. Derek is excited to play along with the football team’s misogynistic scavenger hunt, where boys harass girls to score points. Ashley becomes a target of the cruel game and Derek sides with his buddies even when one of the boys rapes his sister.

SOMEONE I USED TO KNOW tackles the subject of rape from a new perspective. This young adult novel is told using the first person points of view of both Ashley and Derek, as well as through transcripts of her victim impact statement. Not only are the thoughts, feelings, and emotions of the primary victims shown, so are those of one of the secondary victims. The story shows how rape can destroy a family and how those close to the victim also suffer. Blount does an excellent job of getting into the hearts and minds of the characters. Derek’s evolution from willing participant in the game to an advocate for woman is well shown, as is the damage to their family as the result of the rape.

While the book never felt preachy, it sends a clear message about the objectification of women in society and that the person raped isn’t the only victim. Male victims of rape are also mentioned several times, but the book focuses on the effects of rape culture on women and the secondary victims of rape.
This book would be a great tool to create an open dialogue on the topic of rape and its secondary victims. The book is less about the rape itself and more about the process of rebuilding one’s self and relationships with others after sexual assault. Blount provides a list of resources on programs to help prevent sexualized violence and for those affected. In addition to addressing an important topic, SOMEONE I USED TO KNOW is a great story.

To be honest, I don’t know how to feel about this book. Even now after I finished it. It’s a good book, but there are some small personal issues I had with it that don’t affect the overall message of the novel, and they didn’t affect my overall opinion/rating either. And honestly, if I was talking about my favorite things about this book, then this is going to be a LONG review. (And I don’t really know how to talk about the things I like…) So I totally, absolutely, 100% recommend this novel!

But let’s talk about the personal issues I had with it (which shouldn’t sway your opinion on whether you should read it or not!):

- the story is really emotional and informative at the same time. Sometimes, the information about consent and sexual assault and victim blaming is written in blocks, like the author was trying to include everything she had researched in a particular scene, and not just space them out so the character/s can learn something knew about these issues and help them grow as their own individual people. So it feels a bit preachy at times, but that’s okay. Personally, I’ve learned some things through this book!

- There were too many characters, and most of them weren’t developed or rememberable enough, even Brittany, who was in both of the characters’ POVs. I couldn’t really pinpoint their personalities or relate to them at all, or even picture them. They didn’t feel like real people. They’re just there to fill a role.

- Where is their schooling?? Both main characters go to school, which technically affected their everyday lives and the plot, but they didn’t have homework or class work. They didn’t even attend class. (Sorry, that just bothered me a little bit. Please ignore me!)

- I would really, really love to learn more about Sebastian…

With that said, Ashely is a really strong role model, even if she can be frustrating at times. Derek, man, I literally FELT his guilt. The emotions in this book are STRONG, so be prepared to cry and get angry and maybe a little bit triggered too. And it helped me find ways to raise awareness in my own community! (Thank you, Patty Blount!!)

I'll be honest when I say this, I don't think any review I give Someone I Used To Know would be able to do it justice.

No one wants to read or talk about rape but it must be done to bring awareness wherever and as much as possible.

Rape does not just affect the victim it affects the people around the victim, their family and friends. This book hits on this and really brings it home.

I found this book to be very interesting and very different than what I was expecting and what I'm used to. This book is all about our main character Ashley. She was raped before this book even takes place by her brothers friend. This book is all about the aftermath of the assault and how it affects everyone involved. I really enjoyed it because I liked how sad it was, everyone telling Ashley that she should get over it because it happened years ago and they need to stop punishing the other boys by returning the sports teams. I really felt for Ashley because I feel that this is the kind of thing that happens all of the time after a specific time frame it is expected to be forgotten and that isn't always the case for people. Not only did this book show the struggles for Ashley it also showed the struggles that her brother faced with the guilt of bring those boys into his sister's life but also dealing when them in the aftermath, especially as they only got a slap on the wrist and nothing was really done while his sister's life was ruined. I found Ashley to be a very strong character and it was nice to see her not written as a shrinking violet just passively letting things go but this terrible thing happened to her and she wanted the perpetrator to be held liable for their actions. This book won't be for everyone and the strong content could be triggering for some readers.

The Quick Cut: A brother and sister attempt to cope with their lives two years after the sister gets raped. Justice isn't so sweet when the guy gets off easy and the community as a whole blames the victim instead of the perpetrator.

A Real Review:

Thank you to Sourcebooks Fire for providing the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Sexual assault is a touchy subject on any given day, but in today's society filled with #MeToo and far too many uncovered victims that stayed silent before, its an even harder one to approach correctly now. Its hard to talk about such a sensitive topic and bring to light such an important issue while bring hope to victims, lettings others know what they need to do to change their behavior, and provide resources to change your present community. This is one of those books that manages to hold that delicate balance while telling an absolutely beautiful story.

It's been two years since Ashley experienced the worst day of her life and was raped. The people in the community and the kids at her school called it a scavenger hunt gone bad, but she knows better - the guy who raped her is a bad guy who got off easy when the courts didn't sentence him for the full amount of time they could have. Now she can barely function and every day is a moment lived in fear of the next.

Likewise, Derek has spent two years in absolutely hell. He never meant for his little sister to get hurt in the scavenger hunt, but nothing he did stopped Vic from taking advantage of her and taking away her innocence. Now, their relationship is damaged beyond repair and they can't even look at each other. How can he move forward with his life when his family is falling apart and the only person to blame is himself? He should've done more and he knows it... even their older brother Justin knows it. All he can do is lean on his girlfriend Brittany and find redemption now.

I was taken on an emotional roller coaster reading this book and I'm still feeling the after effects. Being an Aspie, I don't get shaken easily, but this one has me feeling off balance even the day after finishing reading it and that speaks to its abilities. Where many books tell the story of the victim of the assault, this one takes it a step farther and talks about the bigger picture: the family as a whole. When someone gets raped, there's secondary victims in those close to them and the way that story is told here is very carefully woven in a way that is very respectful to those who have been through this themselves. What both Ashley and Derek go through feels very real and the little that we experience of their older brother Justin and their parents also feels genuine considering the pain of the crime, the disappointment of the trial's outcome, and the struggle of the siblings to move on.

Ashley has such a profound strength its hard not to like her, but a part of me also started to hate her a little bit. The farther in I read, the more I went from "wow, Derek is terrible!" to "okay, I understand where he was coming from". You end up in this familial roller coaster where you start with one opinion and you end up with another as you get more perspective. The chapters alternate between Ashley and Derek's narrating - with the text going between the present and various moments in the past. There is a lot of light shed on the rape and what was happening at their high school, but also within their sibling relationship. I do have a bone to pick with some unanswered questions about their older sibling Justin that I would've loved to have been further pursued story wise.

The bigger moral here is one that is absolutely worth telling and definitely leaves you thinking. To be honest, it still bothers me right now: as a woman, I'm constantly reminded not to make myself a victim of sexual assault by the way I dress, act, and I even carry pepper spray everywhere I go. However, why is that responsibility on women when the real one should be on men here? Shouldn't they be taught not to rape and end the problem right there? Its a great question.

A beautiful and moving portrayal of the after effects of rape, this story will move you and make you want to change the world around to eliminate the danger of sexual assault.

Disclaimer: I was triggered when I read this book. And because of that, I cannot guarantee that this book will be “curse-free”. If you are uncomfortable reading curses, I apologize in advance. This book has a sensitive topic, which is rape. If you are uncomfortable talking about that too, you are free to not proceed and read the review. Please read at your own risk.

Let’s get started.

This book is about two siblings who are trying to recover from a traumatic experience, an experience that scarred their bond as brother and sister. One feels hate towards the other, and one feels guilt. Both are willing to do anything just to forget what happened. They will test if blood in indeed thicker than water.

Okay. Where do I even begin???

Let’s just skip first thoughts because I can’t remember my first thoughts about this book.

When I started reading this, I was immediately sucked inside the world. I immediately felt the feelings Ashley, the rape victim, felt. It was around the 2nd chapter where the triggers started. I don’t know what to feel! And the feelings I’m feeling, I don’t know where to put it.

Ashley hated her brother, Derek. She said he was one of the reasons she was raped. But Ashley blamed him for other reasons. I understand Ashley’s side. Not being a rape victim side but the side where it’s hard to recover from a traumatic experience. I know that feeling so well; that feeling where when you experience a very traumatic experience, it’s very hard to recover and move on from that. She’s healing. And she needs all support she can get even though she kind of feels like she’s alone. She feels like there’s no one who truly understands her. And that alone is a struggle. Dealing with your own emotion, your own self, is already a struggle. Add to that the uncontrollable emotions, like anxiety and fear, is another level of struggle.

When it is already difficult to deal with yourself, what makes you think it’s easier to deal with other people?


And there’s Derek, Ashley’s older brother.

I don’t know why but my initial feelings I had towards Derek’s character was not hate but curiosity. I want to know why he’s involved in his sister’s rape. And when I found out about it, bes, I almost hurl my phone. I was that triggered. I understood Ashley’s rage towards him then.

In a way, I understood why Derek wants to have some of his own “Me” time and own stuff to do that is not shared with Ashley. However, what I don’t understand is the way he handled getting it. Ashley was attached to Derek; they were close when they were little. And so when Derek started pulling away from Ashley, of course Ashley would cling even tighter because she thought that she’s not wanted anymore. Derek just got his approach wrong.

When Derek started showing signs that he wants to change, like he really was sorry for what happened to his sister, that he is willing to do anything, as in disappear from Ashley’s life, to help his sister, I felt somewhat proud of him. He was so ready to be out of Ashley’s life just for her to recover.

I have one issue though. I feel like their parents kind of blame Ashley too. It does not say but that’s what I’m feeling. Especially when the mother explained that Derek sure deserves some of his own time and do his own thing. However, why did they not explain these things to Ashley when they were little?

Derek loves playing football with their daddy. And Ashley who wants to do everything with Derek also wants to play football. But their dad won’t allow it. So why not explain to Ashley that she is not allowed to play football because it’s what Derek wants to do and there are things that Derek wants for himself that he doesn’t want to share. Is that so hard to do as a parent?

Maybe one of the reasons why Ashley felt like Derek doesn’t want her anymore is because of the lack of guidance from their parents. They did not let Ashley understand that Derek and her are two different people and that there are things that one wants to do without the other and accept those reality.


This book is the only book that made me cry every time I read it. And I mean every time. When I reach halfway in the book, I started crying. And when I reach the end, I’m still crying. This book hit me with so many emotions I needed to let some of it out because I felt like I’m close to explosion. This is so heavy!

I love that this book hit all the crucial parts of reality about society and rape culture. I love that this book talked about something as sensitive as rape and give readers lessons about how to deal with it and what is what around this stuff. I want to commend the author, Ms Patty Blount, for being so brave in writing about a topic like this.

The ending of this book is what made me cry real hard. I had to put my phone down to recover from that feels. I’m not gonna talk about the ending to avoid spoilers. But know that I cried cats and dogs after reading the last chapter before the epilogue.

To wrap this up, this book is seriously amazing. I love reading books that has sensitive topics even if it’s fiction. It says a lot about the author, writing books like this. They are brave and they see the harsh and cruel reality of the world. And they use books to open our eyes and see those as well. I totally recommend this book, bessies.

I received this book from Sourcebooks Fire through Netgalley for an honest review. Wow! I don't even know where to begin. I feel that this is a very important book and that all young adults should read it. It's a bit disturbing due to the subject matter but how it addresses rape culture, not just the crime of the rape itself, is so important in this day and age. I loved how Ms. Blount showed what the the victims entire family and her friends were going through in the aftermath of the assault, how they all were dealing with it separately and as a group. One thing I cannot stand is the "boys will be boys" mentality and this book directly addresses that. If you are a teenager or have a teenager in your life, you need to read this book with them and then have a discussion about it.

This book was emotional and heartbreaking! It was so intense I couldn’t put it down! It really had me hooked.

I voluntarily read and reviewed an advanced copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own

Such a timely and important book I’ll recommend to my students. Reminded me of Tradition by Brendan Kiely in its portrayal of rape culture and how it’s perpetuated and often encouraged by so many, especially in sports and on college campuses. I appreciated the POV of Derek as a secondary survivor, and the haunting portrayal of survivor Ashley and her ongoing struggle to deal with that life altering event. Brilliant writing and a no holds barred approach.

I revived this book from Netgalley in exchange for my honest opinion and review. This is a book that everyone on Earth should read. This is such an important subject. Learning about Ashley's story meant a lot to me. I too am a victim of sexual assault and knowing there are many women and men out there going through the same thing as me helps a lot. She is so incredibly brave and strong. My favorite thing about this book was Derek. He admitted he was wrong (which takes a lot of courage) and is doing something about it. He loves Ashley and wants her to know it too. That is one amazing brother. Derek is the kind of man that every girl needs in her life. He fights for us. I can't wait for this book to get into the hands of the public! It's going to make a huge impact on the ya world

Before I get into my review I have to say that this book has a trigger warning. So if you are unable to read books about rape then don’t read on.

Rape is not something that’s easy to write. I commend the author for taking on such a subject.

This book also happens to be told in different POVs popping back and forth between the past and present. It doesn’t just focus

Ashley is in high school as a freshman who was raped by a senior football player. From her brothers football team. Ashley had a crush on him, she gets to know him and they spend time together she also trusted him.

The thing that’s got me is that it was all because of a game What?! I have no words to that.

This book is so many different things wrapped into one. It’s raw, devastating and gut wrenching to read. There’s so many others that I’m feeling right now after finishing it but I honestly don’t know how to put it into words.

I received this book from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

This book is intense. Read the synopsis so you know what you're getting into. This is not a fluffy contemporary. This is story about an innocent girl who get raped as part of a sick game played by the football team. However its more than that, it's about the family that get devastated and the friendships thats grow in the wake of tragedy. Someone I Used to Know takes an important glance at how rape affects more than just the victim. The story is told from alternating voices and by weaving the past into the present. I loved how powerful the writing was. Ashley is a badass. She takes her experiences and becomes an advocate. She broken, flawed but trying to heal. Her brother Derek was also apart of the fallout. His perspectives were intense and heartbreaking at time. Someone I Used to Nor is truly a beautiful heart wrenching novel. It talks about how boys will be boys is not an acceptable excuse and it never was. It's a timely and fitting for our current social climate, and the ME TOO movements.

Someone I Used to Know is a powerful story that every parent, high school, student, educator should read. Told in duel POV of Ashley and her brother Derek this story hooks you from the first chapter. This is a must read book that will change your thinking and have you questioning every thing you thought you knew.

It's really difficult to review a book like this. Rape is NOT an easy topic to read about. It's also not an easy topic to write about. Yet, sexual violence permeates our culture at alarming rates. Did you know that every 98 seconds an American is sexually assaulted? Meanwhile only 6 out of every 1,000 perpetrators ends up in prison. It's fact - I looked it up.

Someone I Used to Know by Patty Blount gives voice to the idea that today's culture reinforces the normalization of sexual violence. I didn't agree with everything presented in the book but I definitely appreciate that she wasn't afraid to tell this story and encourage readers to think.

In, Someone I Used to Know , Ashley is a high school freshman who is raped by a senior football player. He is a boy she had a crush on. A boy she kissed and spent time with. A boy she trusted. It was all part of a football team scavenger hunt. The boys literally preyed on girls for points. It was viewed as a "boys will be boys" game.

The story is told through various points-of-view and goes back and forth between the present and the past. It was easy to follow and it offers us different insight at various stages of the book.

A few things I really liked:
1. Ashley grew from a terrified victim, barely surviving to a warrior. I applauded her growth even when I didn't agree with everything she did. So many instances of sexual violence go unreported because the victims are made to feel as if they were to blame. I applauded Blout's firm stance on this - the victims are NOT to blame no matter what they wore, where they were, or even if they said yes previously. This is a message everyone needs to hear!

"Justice is achieved when those who aren't injured feel as indignant as those who are."

2. I appreciated Ashley's brother Derek's story. He was a great example of what so many people think when confronted with the reality of sexual violence. Their strife was very real and emotional. We saw him go from being so angry he blamed her ("Why didn't you just stay home?") to being a voice for the cause himself. While that may not have been a totally realistic change, I felt that the emotions he went through - blaming himself, feeling like he should have done something, battling his own feelings of inadequacy over not being her hero - those were very real.

3. The depiction of the family turmoil was brutally honest. When Ashley was raped - it affected her whole family. How could it not? Her struggles became their struggles. There was so much anger in each of them. My heart ached for all of them.

"Forgiveness is rarely this once-and-done thing. It's an ongoing battle, a struggle to remember that love is worth more than pain, and that fighting for it matters more than a grudge."

4. Even though the story itself ended on a positive note I appreciated that it didn't sugar coat things and pretend everything was going to be happily ever after. Blount acknowledges that it is a never ending process but one that does get easier with support.

"Every last bit of the pain and shame and guilt and grief I've carried since my freshman year drips from soul, collecting in a reservoir. They're not gone for good though, and I know they'll leak out sometimes. But my dam is stronger now. Higher walls. Reinforced not with concrete and steel, but with unbreakable family ties."

5. Support - Therapists, support groups, family, friends! I applaud that those were all a big part of the the story and not just for Ashley but for her family as well. I think that's an important message. It's so easy for survivors to feel alone. Support is essential.

I'll be honest, some might find the book a bit preachy but this is a topic that needs to be discussed. As a YA book geared for teens I think it does a wonderful job of sending out the right message.

***Thanks to NetGalley for providing me a complimentary copy of SOMEONE I USED TO KNOW by Patty Blount in exchange for my honest review.***

I wish I didn’t have to write this review. I’m a Patty Blount fan and preordered SOMEONE I USED TO KNOW as I do all her YA novels. When I received notification that I was approved for an ARC, I was so excited.

Blount’s writing is as appealing as ever. I love how she strings words together with beauty and ease. Initially, I was drawn into Ashley’s fears and pain. Her PTSD felt authentic.

After a few pages, the story morphed from genuine to self-righteous. I felt as if I was reading Blout’s opinions instead of a teenage rape survivor about toxic masculinity, high school football and how these issues ought to be handled. Ashley’s victim impact statements sounded like an adult writing for a teenager.

Derek was obviously the character on a journey from complicit to champion. The dialogue around his education seemed more like the writer attempting to educate readers poorly disguised as plots.

Sebastian was The Perfect Boy example of how high school young men ought to treat girls, view toxic masculinity and be paragons of virtue.

I was so disappointed with the execution of this wonderful plot premise. I don’t blame Blount for wanting to write a teachable story on these important issues. I respect her for it and wish an editor had toned down the preaching. SOMEONE I USED TO KNOW could and should have been a five star review for me.

I’d recommend the book for middle schoolers who haven’t had a lot of exposure to sexual assault and rape culture but older teens will probably see right through the over lessons.