As with her previous books, Jude Sierra continues to give such an amazing story, characters and emotions, The depth of emotion that she creates for her characters is so well done. I loved the journey the characters go on both on their own and together. It’s so sweet to see these two guys learn how to create this new little family in Florida. I always loved that the main character was from Eau Claire because that’s where I grew up! Very neat, This is a great story for anyone dealing with mental illness and the people around them, Jude handles the topics so wonderfully, I would recommend this book to anyone.

I understood this book but I haven’t experienced anything like what the characters are going through.
Reid suffers from a little known mental illness that leaves him able to cope but unable to feel what he considers “normal.” His mood swings, often quickly, other times slowly, from depressed to not quite euphoric, and back again. He has suffered from this for many years (he’s less than 21 years old) and through therapy and medication has come to realize that some people are toxic to him. For that reason he’s left his Wisconsin home to stay at his grandmother’s house in Florida. Not really knowing what he’s going to do to fill his time he enrolls in SCUBA diving classes and it is there that he meets Joaquim, his SCUBA instructor. When his former boyfriend shows up uninvited he is able to tell him to go away, which shows progress in his ability to take care of himself.
Joaquim is doing an internship far from his home in Brazil, hoping to find permanent work in Florida. Joaquim is attracted to Reid and they fall first in lust and eventually in love. When his hopes for a job fall through he decides to go back home to visit his family. This is the antithesis of the way Reid functions. Reid is borderline OCD, keeping his home clean and orderly but unable to function without a life plan. Joaquim prefers to go with the wind, and what happens, happens.
The reader follows Joaquim, Reid, and their friends as they try to learn about each other, with the support of their friends. There are ups and downs along the way, and by the end of the book, are closer to being able to cope. This is the definitive HFN ending, without a firm handle on their futures, either separately or together. Not everyone’s life plays out along a pattern, especially with the interference of a mental illness. I won’t say I enjoyed this book as parts of it are very sad and upsetting, but it is a realistic look at imperfect lives. This is a book I recommend, however, for its view of life as it is.

3,5-4 stars

This was an interesting and unique story!The story was captivating and the characters felt realistic!The concept was great!It wasn't an easy book to read, it's a heartbreaking story!

**I received an ARC in exchange for an honest review**

<i/> This is a story about a boy on an adventure, a boy coming into his own and falling in love. For all of those living with mental illness, this story is for you. And I tell you this story because although I am just one voice, I hope that using it will help those who are afraid to speak feel less alone. Like Reid, I want my life and voice to be a tiny piece of something greater. </i>

I've been trying to get my thoughts together on this #ownvoices book because it took me on quite the ride, mentally and emotionally. I personally suffer mental illness, but it's always a hit or miss whether not I'll actually connect with a character also suffering from a MI as well. But I love Reid. I've been through very similar experiences as him, and multiple times throughout the book, found myself saying, "No, I know what you're about to do!" because it would've been my next move in the scattered chessboard of my mind.

It's not an easy book to read. It hurts. God, it hurts. But it also heals you, and I implore you to give it a chance.

A heartbreaking book, dealing with very real subjects. The descriptions and character back stories were engaging, I just felt like I wanted more. Overall it was my very Jude Sierra read and it's won't be my last that's for sure.

Unfortunately, I wasn't a huge fan of this book. There were things that I did like and things that I didn't, so I'll start with what I did like.

I liked the explanation of Reid's mental illness. I knew literally NOTHING about being cyclothymic and, in fact, had never even heard of it. Getting a first hand account of everything that goes through a person's mind by an author who has actually gone through it is fascinating and makes the story feel that much more real. I love reading books about mental illnesses that author's have suffered from because you know you are getting the genuine feelings behind it. Great job with the education, Ms. Sierra!

So what I didn't like.

The author's note says that Reid isn't his mental illness, but unfortunately, I feel like that's all we know about Reid. We aren't given much information about his personality outside of his mental illness; we know nothing about his hopes, his hobbies or anything other than how he's coping with mental illness. It was hard to feel the connection between Reid and Joaquim when everything was just about Reid's mental illness. Furthermore, the book was so focused on Reid's mental illness and his thoughts and feelings that it made it seem like Joaquim was always doing something wrong or like his feelings didn't really matter. I can't imagine how a relationship like that could last when there is no dialogue about how Joaquim could handle things better, what he should or shouldn't say, or even that it's okay for him to feel frustrated when Reid shuts him out.

Another problem I had with this book is that it should have been written from a first person POV. There were times when thoughts and dialogue became confusing due to the third person POV. Being inside Reid's and Joaquim's head would have made for more multi-dimensional characters and would really make readers understand their thought processes.

I'm torn on this book. While I wouldn't necessarily recommend it to my friends as an entertainment read, I could see why reading this book could be helpful and instructive to those who know someone suffering from this mental illness.