Who am I? Where do I come from? Is my whole life a lie? These are questions that Jessie Sloane is now forced to ask herself in the slow burn psychological thriller, When the Lights Go Out by Mary Kubica. This journey is one of twists and turns and 'OMG' moments you won't want to miss!

Jessie's dying mother tells her to 'go find yourself'. Jessie, assuming her mother meant for her to make something of herself, do what she enjoys, make her life what she has dreamed of enrolls in college but after red flags are raised as to her identity, Jessie has to wonder if that is what her mother actually meant by those words.

Now: Plagued with insomnia Jessie takes us with her on her quest to 'find herself'. Not just questioning her identity but also the things around. her. Is she seeing what she thinks she is, hearing what is being whispered to her or is the insomnia making her endeavor that much harder? Each passing day brings her closer to solving the mystery of her life but with each passing day brings more exhaustion and the fear that lack of sleep will eventually end her life.

Then: We follow Eden back 20 years and relive her emotional and heart wrenching struggles with her. Her story is one born of love and what society tells us are worth is to be. The triggers and stumbling blocks taking Eden to places that she never thought she would be. Eden may hold the answers to Jessie's questions.

When The Lights Go Out is told with a then and now narration volleying between Eden (then) and Jessie (now). I adored both of them. I found Eden and Jessie incredibly relatable and likable. I cried for Eden and bit my nails for Jessie and loved every moment of the book. Prior to reading this book, I read the mixed reviews and I knew the end was a love or hate conclusion and I can say that I loved it. I thought it was perfect and flowed really well with the rest of the story! Given an alternate ending, I wouldn't have chosen any other. I very much enjoyed When the Lights Go Out!

Thank you to Netgalley and Harlequin books for the opportunity to read and review When the Lights Go Out.

Listen, I'm a huge Kubica fan and still am and she will continue to be an autobuy author for me. It was bound to happen though - at some point one of her books was just not going to work for me and unfortunately this is the one.


Let's start with the good. Man, I just LOVE her writing style. It's atmospheric, draws you right in from the very first chapter and the short chapters make her books a breeze to get through. This book is no different. I was glued to the pages - needing to see what was going to happen. Is Jessie going insane with each passing day her insomnia is keeping her awake? How far will Eden go to get the family she so desperately wants? I NEED TO KNOW ANSWERS!

At one point, I thought to myself, "Self, if this goes in THIS direction, I'm going to be so pissed off." Well, IT DID and uff.... I wanted to throw this book across the room. For 95% of the book I was so invested and then WHY... WHYYYYYYYYYYY. **throws tantrum** Now, some people are really going to LOVE this twist and I can see why. Unfortunately it didn't set well with me. Nope. Not even a little bit. Sigh. Readers, you'll see why when you read this book, and you still definitely should because I need people to talk to about this!

Don't worry, the following won't spoil anything..... What I enjoyed best was the portrayal of the emotional instability miscarriages can cause - I'll be quite personal here and tell you when I went through mine, I hated everyone who was getting pregnant so easily (and it was a surprise for me, not planned at all so surprise surprise when I was thoroughly devastated... men will never understand the physical and mental ups and downs - hell, my hair even grew curly afterwards - hey, biology, how are ya?)... I've come to terms with not having children and I am A-OK with it now, but for a period of time I would either break into tears, get thoroughly pissed and felt a giant hole (which gradually grows smaller day by day but will likely never go fully away). Kubica very well puts these feelings into this book... and then some. For that, I thank her. I'm not one to get "triggered" but for those that are - the topic of miscarriages and infertility run amok in this book.

I'm still ruffled about that twist. I really wish it had gone in a different direction. But hey, not all books will work, even from one of my favorites. I'll still be keeping a keen eye out for her next book. <3

I have read and enjoyed other books by Mary Kubica but unfortunately I could not get into this one. It was well written, as are all her books, but the story line just did not grab my attention and as a result I did not finish the book.

Mary Kubica writes beautifully, no doubt about it. She also knows how to pace her stories to build suspense slowly until you can hardly wait to find out what happens.

The book starts with Jesse Sloane sitting in the hospital while the mother she has taken care of through her cancer dies. It's a heartbreak as it's only been the two of them for as long as Jesse can remember. The story is told from two points of view, Jesse's and that of her mother, Eden.

Jesse is trying to get over her grief and move on with her life after her mother's death. She finds an apartment, and applies to the local college. Imagine her surprise when she is told by the admissions office that the social security number she listed on her application belongs to a girl who died when she was 3 years old almost two decades ago. She is told to come back with valid ID or they can't admit her to college. What the heck?!?

Unable to find a birth certificate in her state, Jesse begins to question who she is and why her mother lied to her. Always an insomniac, Jesse has even more trouble getting any sleep as she tries to find out who she really is, and the lack of sleep soon makes her paranoid and not only questioning everything, but seeming to see and hear things that aren't there.

Then comes a twist readers will never expect. I was fully invested in the book until the twist and that killed it for me. Come on, Mary! You're so talented, you certainly could've come up with a better ending.

Many thanks to NetGalley and Hanover Square Park Press for allowing me to read a copy of the book in exchange for an honest review.

Wow, talk about a dark read! This story grabs you from the beginning and doesn't let go. Alternating between Jessie, the daughter - present day and Eden, the mother - twenty years ago, this is a wild ride for readers. Many twists and turns with a surprise ending.

I had heard many good things about author Mary Kubica. She’s a best seller with an array of books that are right up my mystery/thriller loving alley. When the Lights Go Out looked like it was going to be another great novel to add to my shelf.

To start out, this book had a lot of intrigue before you even open the cover. The description alone told you that you were about to encounter a psychological mind game mixed with mystery. Definitely catching from the go. Kubica has an eclectic writing style that is interesting to read and feels like your brain putting a puzzle together as you progress into the book. That adds a layer of interest that some books don’t have.

While the idea behind the book was good, I found it very hard to get into and stay into this novel. Being up front, I was not able to finish it. That is not to say it was bad writing or a bad story, the concept that played out in the book was not appealing to me in the end. I understood the main character to be confused and almost hallucinating due to insomnia and other factors, but I found myself confused more times than not to a level that made understanding the book in general hard.

This isn’t to say that I would not read Mary Kubica’s work in the future, because I would. I just did not connect with this one. I do like her style of writing and obviously a lot of people enjoy her work. I would encourage everyone to take a look for themselves and let me know your own thoughts! I’ll be checking out her next book.

When The Lights Go Out was my fourth Mary Kubica novel. (The only one I haven't read of hers is Every Last Lie, but I own it!) There were a lot of moments throughout the novel that I could not put it down. But there were also a lot of moments where I dreaded picking it up.

Specifically, two storylines were just too much: Eden's completely over-the-top mental state over wanting to have a baby, and Jessie's sleep issues. While I can relate to much of what Eden felt during her first stages of frustration over not being able to have a baby, I cannot fathom getting as crazy as she became in her pursuit. Why didn't her husband encourage her to get a job UNTIL they had a baby so that her whole life's focus wasn't just on her failure to conceive? I am sure it is possible that there are women who react to this situation as extremely as Eden did, but I have never met one, nor was it at all enjoyable or exciting to read about for chapter after chapter. Jessie's sleep issues started out somewhat interesting, but again, after not a lot new about it chapter after chapter, it just felt repetitive and boring.

While I didn't mind the twist in the final 10% of the book that many people are so upset about, I did think it was a cop-out. I think after slogging through all the trauma Jessie and Eden went through, that twist felt like the reader had just wasted her time wondering how the mystery would be resolved. I will give it to Mary Kubica, though: I did not see the twist coming. And, without giving any spoilers away, I am a sucker for a certain aspect of the ending that this twist brought.

So, Mary Kubica is still a go-to author for me as I do get caught up in her stories so fully. When The Lights Go Out should probably not be someone's introduction to her work, though, as The Good Girl and Don't You Cry are much better examples of how amazing she is.

Thanks to Mary Kubica, Netgalley, and Harlequin for an ecopy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Decently interesting and engaging, but the portrayal of infertility was upsetting (I'm sick of fellow infertile women being demonized in literature) and the ending was SO unexpected and dull at the same time. I reviewed this title here: https://youtu.be/3bKmvZxdWmo?t=1m55s

Told in alternating voices, this thriller follows Eden, a woman desperate to have a child, and Jessie, a young woman who has just made a discovery that throws her into a crisis of identity.

The novel veers into the realm of psychological thriller as each woman falls further down the rabbit hole of grief and confusion. Jessie, in particular, is also suffering from insomnia, and her lack of sleep makes it difficult for her to differentiate between what's real and what's in her head.

This was a quick read for me as I sped through to get to the reveal . . . . and the author threw in a twist I didn't see coming! Recommend to fans of thrillers like Gone Girl.

Mary Kubica knocks it out of the park!! This is the best ARC I’ve had the privilege of reading. Absolutely wonderful, thoughtful characters that wove magic in this story. The roller coaster of emotions was great. And wow! Twists and turns I did not see coming! Would highly recommend this book to anyone and everyone.
Wish I could give more than 5 stars!

This book was different from every other book by Mary Kubica. When it first begins you are seeing 2 sides & wondering how they will merge. About halfway through, you are certain that you know what will happen. No way will you know what is coming! I love that about this author. She doesn't just use the same formula for every tale. Eden was a well illustrated character that you will root for until her sad end.

Oh man. Torn, very torn. How do you even…ok, so what do you do with a book that’s so well written, positively hypnotic as it draws you in, completely engaging and then leaves you feeling so very cheated. Because this book is like that. In fact if you haven’t read the book yet, read this review at your own discretion. It might contain giveaways, it might contain angry ranting like…it was all a freaking dream? Are you serious? It’s it enough to utilize one of the tritest clichés in the book of female author female centric thrillers and make it all about the baby? All about the baby, obsession to have a baby, the kind of obsession that ends a marriage. But then make a giant portion of a book into a freaking dream. That just isn’t right. All the clues and insinuations and possibilities only to be tied up with the most rational plain easy (too easy) of a resolution. WTF. How does someone who can obviously write that well just totally drops a ball like that on the basic plotting. How disappointing. And yet, even despite all that, the book was such an enjoyable read. Jessie made for a very compelling narrator, strikingly nonannoying 20 year old, who’s going off the rails whilst sleep deprived and that’s actually rendered terrifically, so eerily disorienting and claustrophobic. And the author obviously knows how to wield a first person narration to maximum advantage. In fact she did so many things right and checked so many boxes on the prototypical thriller of this kind, that it boggles the mind to think that in the end it’s actually nothing but a family drama with a creative protracted dream sequence. First time reading the author and I’m intrigued, despite slight anger and/or resentment over such blatant use of storytelling trickery. I even refuse to consider it an ending plot twist. Too easy. Too unoriginal. Too done. Maybe the title should have been a giveaway. But then again so many things occur when the lights go out other than sleep. And still oddly enough a very entertaining read. Go figure. Thanks Netgalley.

Jessie Sloane's mom has passed away, but before doing so, she encouraged Jessie to find herself. Jessie decides to apply to college, but the college flags her social security number. Apparently it belongs to someone who is deceased. As Jessie attempts to unravel the bureaucracy behind her application, she becomes more and more convinced that something is up with her past. Even worse, her thoughts are jumbled by the fact that she hasn't slept well since her mother's death. She's no longer able to tell what's truly happening around her. What's the story with her identity? And is she crazy or is something sinister going on in her life?

"Find yourself, Mom told me. One of two wishes she had for me before she died. Maybe she didn't mean for me to apply to college. Maybe it was far less esoteric than that. Maybe it was quite literal. Find yourself, she said, because Jessie Sloane isn't you."

Well, I'm not so sure about this one. The novel goes back in forth in time between present-day Jessie and her story and a woman named Eden, whose story mainly takes place in the 1990s. Eden's timeline varies a bit though, which makes it hard to keep track of. (At least for me.) A lot of Eden's storyline revolves around infertility, which I thought was handled very well. As someone who has struggled with that, I identified with her and probably liked the book a bit more just because of that.

As for Jessie and her tale, it was definitely creepy at times, which is something Mary Kubica can do very well. With her sleep deprivation, Jessie is the ultimate unreliable narrator, and it's very hard to tell if she's crazy or what on earth is happening. At times, it seems as if the book is leading you down a particular path, but you're never exactly sure who or what to trust.

And then, of course, there's that twist. I'd heard a lot about it, so I was expecting something, but with Kubica, it's hard to know what. I'll admit, it wasn't this. I had sort of figured out where things were leading, but it didn't diminish how cheated I felt by the ending. I've seen a lot of reviews where folks loved it and others where they didn't--I just felt letdown. I won't go further so as to avoid spoilers, but know that it did diminish my overall enjoyment of the book. And while I wasn't loving it entirely--it's sort of a jumble of confusion and weird characters--the ending deflates what I did enjoy.

Overall, this is a creepy book in many ways, with a story that befuddles but intrigues you. It's compelling but the ending diminishes a lot of the early drama and excitement. 3 stars.

This is my first Mary Kubica novel and I can't wait to read her previous work. This book has completely bowled me over. Due to the convoluted plot, it is difficult to discuss the storyline without divulging too many details. Jessie Sloane is at her mother's deathbed. While grieving her passing, she finds a new home and applies for college. The college notifies her that she needs her social security number which leads her to realizing that she does not know who she really is. The novel alternates between Jessie's present life and the life of Eden twenty years before. It is up to the reader to solve the puzzles that link these two women. Just when you think you know Jessie's identification, the author takes you down another rabbit hole. What a great read. Thank you to Harlequin-Hanover Square Press and NetGalley for providing an e-ARC in exchange for an honest review.

I've loved every previous book by this author, so I thought I'd love this one as well.... maybe it just got a little too close to home, I don't know, but I didn't enjoy this one as much as previous ones. I finished, but barely. I am not willing to give up on the author yet, but I honestly just didn t like this one as much as the past books.

Thanks to Netgalley and Park Row Books for the free copy in exchange for my honest review.

This book will definitely divide people and especially fans of Mary Kubica. WHEN THE LIGHTS GO OUT is a book that I loved, until the very end. It's rare that a book will flip like that for me, but it does happen on occasion. I will also warn that this book does deal with the topic of miscarriages and infertility, so that's something to keep in mind before starting.

Insomnia is something that a lot of people seem to suffer from for one reason or another, and it is no joke. Not being able to sleep or get very little sleep definitely begins to take a toll on you and not just physically. We follow two timelines - Jessie in the present and Eden, her mother, in the past. Their relationship is built on a secret that is beginning to affect Jessie now and her future plans.

The short chapters made this a very quick read and this had me drawn in from the very beginning. Is Jessie's insomnia beginning to take a toll on her mentally? What lengths is Eden willing to go in order to get the family she is yearning for? The place where I have an issue with this book is the final twist. I know a few other readers have the same issue. This went in a different direction than I was anticipating and hoping for, but on the flip side, I can see a lot of other readers loving it.

The characters were very relatable and felt authentic. The pain and heartache felt by Eden with the issues she was experiencing trying to have a family. I know this will be harder for some people, but I think that Kubica approaches it very well. As someone that knows I won't be having children (for medical reasons), it wasn't as difficult for me to get through. The effects of insomnia are very real, I know some people that suffer from it and it 100% begins to take a mental toll on you.

Overall, I would say that this is a book that just didn't completely work for me personally. It's been a back and forth on my final rating and I would say that I fall in the middle ground for this one. I know a lot of people will love the pacing and the final twist! I love Kubica's writing and will continue to pick up her future titles - she really knows how to weave a great thriller.

After the death of her mother Jessie goes on to try to better herself when she realizes she has no information on proof that she even exist. As insomnia takes hold of her for multiple days while trying to find information about herself or her father. Things start to escalate when her insomnia making her judgment impaired questioning whats real or not.

When I was going into this book all I knew was that the cover was so lovely and eye catching and that the author's name sounded familiar so I decided to pick this book up. It was surprisingly good. I loved with each page got me questioning the sanity of Jessie wondering if what she was seeing is real or not and it was just a mess with her character and I loved it. Then there was Edens side of the story seeing where she was playing at in this book with her journal entry's and seeing her life progress and seeing how she and Jessie connected. It was heart breaking seeing her progress from happy and hopeful to depressed and seeing her question the lengths she would go to have a child. This was such a great mystery thriller type of book and I loved every moment of it.

Not the usual fabulous novels from this author. Insomnia at its finest. Both from the main character as well as from me. Yawn. I finished it, but overall thought it was just okay. Expected more, a lot more.

Mary Kubica is an expert at building suspense with her writing. It is nearly impossible to put the book down. You must keep reading to find out what is happening and what is coming. Some good twists here.

Jessie Sloan's mother is dying from breast cancer. Too afraid to not be there for her mom when the moment comes, Jessie's been avoiding sleep. When a kind doctor takes pity on Jessie, giving her something to help her sleep, she reluctantly drifts off -- only to wake up and find her mother already dead.

Eden's dying wish for her daughter was that Jessie finds herself. So much of their lives had been wrapped up in Eden's cancer: battling it, thinking they beat it, only to have the cancer come back with a vengeance, moving from breast, to lungs, to bones. Feeling more lost than ever, Jessie tries to keep Eden's promise. So she applies to college. After all, that's where people her age are supposed to be finding themselves, right?

The problem is, Jessie's social security number actually belongs to someone else: a three-year-old who died in a hit and run accident years ago.

Now, Jessie doesn't know what to think. As each day after her mother's death passes, both the truth of who Jessie might actually be and sleep eludes her. The harder she looks into her past, the more she questions not just who she is, but what kind of person Eden actually was. But as each day passes where she's unable to sleep, Jessie's connection with reality breaks to the point where the only thing she ends up being sure about is that once she reaches day 11 of being awake, she's going to die.

Interspersed with journal entries from Eden in her pre-Jessie days, Kubica weaves a suspenseful story with rich, well-developed characters, and a twist ending I didn't see coming. Not only did I find myself caught up in wondering the lengths Eden will go to have a baby she wants desperately, or whether or not Jessie finds out the truth of who she is, but the way Kubica handled Jessie's insomnia was by far the most realistic representation I've seen in a while.

As someone who struggles with insomnia, I actually ended up reading this on a weekend where I couldn't sleep. Not only was the story captivating, but on a deeper level, I felt incredibly understood.

Steeped in mystery, suspense, and struggles with grief and mental illness, When the Lights Go Out is the perfect book for a rainy fall day.