Beware, this is a DNF review.
I feel like this book just wasn't meant to be liked by me. I do believe many people will in fact love it, but those people won't be the same people who have gone through tons of YA books in the past. To me, 'Starfish' just felt too cliche, too simple, too repetitive. Only 5% in and I was rolling my eyes while highlighting quotes which could have been taken from Tumblr. Don't get me wrong - there is some value in this book and it may become an important read for some but I'm just too tired of reading the same thing over and over again. So I'll leave joy for someone else.

YA contemporary is always a bit his and miss with me so I’m a bit on the fence about this one. On one hand this was beautifully written and bittersweet, and ultimately hopeful. I liked the portrayal of Keko as someone who couldn’t own half her own identity because that was the half her mother constantly put down. The social anxiety also felt authentic. I was ambivalent about her mother who is borderline moustache twirling villain at times she’s so one note. I can well believe that the more extreme awful things she said have actually been said somewhere by someone’s parent, and your mother usually has the power of god over your psyche – it’s an incredibly hard thing to break away from and reject. But on the other hand constant bad behaviour, abuse and cruelty would not keep Keko coming back. There had to be moments of softening so that Keko could’ve justified the lie that her mother cared about her really to herself – and there just weren’t any of those moments. I was also a bit iffy on the tone which was that Keko’s mother was mentally ill – undiagnosed – and that was why she behaved the way she did. This is very unpalatable. People are entirely responsible for their own actions. Blaming mental illness removes the blame from the person who should be blamed and adds to the toxic mythology that mental illness can be conflated with abuse or criminal behaviour when of course they are not mutually inclusive or exclusive concepts. I am wary of child sex abuse being used as a character’s back story too. I don’t think it was exploitative here but there were elements of overcoming it that just didn’t ring true. Overall it was a decent book but too many puzzle pieces were out of alignment for me.

I really liked this book. It had a strong and amazing representation of social anxiety which I could relate to myself and It was refreshing to see it well done.

It was heartbreaking to read and just overall beautiful.

I’m struggling to get words out to describe how i feel but I absolutely loved it, truly. The writing was absolutely stunning and I had to take breaks just to take in what I was reading.

I loved the romance and how it slowly came about and wasn’t at all forced.

I definitely recommend you to read this book! I’ll write a full review closer to release date.

My first NetGalley review!

Beautifully written and poignant this is the story of half-Japanese Kiko and her emotionally abusive, manipulative white mother who constantly criticizes Kiko and her looks. Apparently she can do nothing right and this has given Kiko a severe case of anxiety and co-dependency, initially leaning on best friend Emery she switches to childhood friend Jamie after Emery leaves for college.

Two shy brothers, and a father I'd like to know about, plus a fascinating Japanese artist round out an interesting cast of characters. The character development was brilliant and I loved how Kiko matured and grew up and learned to handle her anxiety and become independent.

I absolutely loved the story and I thought it flowed very well. I was drawn in and I couldn't put it down, I loved Akemi's writing style and I can't wait to read more from her.

I’ve read many books that involve following their journey of self discovery and growing up but I’ll be completely honest, I’ve not read any like starfish.

It’s obvious through reading this book that the author has a real connection to the story, and the passion that is woven throughout it does not go unnoticed. I find that such a connection is quite rare to see in books these days!
The plot is entirely original, following Kiko’s touching and at times heartbreaking journey of self discovery through growing up and having many different experiences/emotions.

I fell in love with the character after only a couple of pages in, the way this book is written makes it completely relateable as you suffer and try to escape Kiko’s anxiety and self destructive thoughts along with her; I can’t give her enough credit for being so strong!

Brilliant book, really touching and is definitely a book I will remember.

Thank you for the opportunity to read it, I’m very appreciative and I will definitely be purchasing a hard copy for myself and for friends.

Ohhhh booooy was this book intense! It was such an emotional rollercoaster tbh. I would just like to say that Kiko's mum is absolutely the worst person i've read about, I just hate her so much. Starfish indeed.

I really loved Kiko, and watching her grow, and watching her learn to love herself and escape and learn who she was as a person as well as learning what real love is, whether romantic, platonic or familial love.

I especially like at the end of chapters, where Kiko would draw something to reflect her mood, it just was such a great way to get to know her more too.

I just don't even know what else to say tbh haha, except prepare yourself emotionally before reading this book, because it is so raw and emotional and intense, that you need to be ready

Tbh I would've liked it to maybe be a little bit longer at the end though


Trigger Warnings for emotional abuse, sexual abuse and suicide attempt

Starfish is the story of a mixed-race girl growing up with difficulty in small town Nebraska, and deals with issues such as identity, anxiety, sexual abuse and race. Her mom is just THE WORST and it’s a frustrating read at times because Kiko has no emotional support of any kind. 3.5 stars bumped up to 4 for the rating system - extra points for how well it deals with issues of race and identity.

(I received a copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review)

Kiko, an aspiring artist, is about to graduate from high school and ready to leave home. Wanting to escape from her toxic relationship with her narcissistic mother.

When Kiko is not accepted in her no.1 art school, which would have been a fresh start away from home, she decides to travel to California with her childhood best friend. It is there where she tries to find her identity in this world and deals with obstacles in her life with the help of her friend and an artist who takes her under his wing.

This book touches topics like racism, anxiety, sexual and emotional abuse, and suicide. The way Akemi Dawn Bowman weaved all this into the story was authentic; it felt real.

Kiko is a great narrator, I liked how she switches from what she wanted to say to what she actually said. Or how detailed she describes her anxiety, something I can identify with. And how her descriptions of her drawings at the of a chapter were so visual for me and matched her feelings in that moment. I absolutely loved reading Starfish and love the cover!

Thank you, Back &White Publishing, and NetGalley for my eARC.

Starfish review

Kiko has always felt like an outsider, her mother doesn’t seem to care about her, she only has one friend. However she finds solace in her art and hopes that she get into Prism art college and get away from her mother and start a new life. This all comes falling down when Kiko fails into get into Prism and to make matters worse, her uncle moves in.
So Kiko leaves town and tours arts schools with a childhood friend Jamie and hopefully she can start another life.
Starfish has been the best book I’ve read so far this year. It is a very moving and emotional book that had me crying, laughing and shouting out loud at times. It is a brilliant YA book. There are a few shocks in Starfish that pulled the rug from under my feet. Starfish will also stay with me for a long time. Starfish is also perfect for those who have felt liked they have never fitted in.

Starfish follows Kiko, a growing artist, who dreams being accepted into her dream art school and finally be free of her abusive mother.

Starfish was brutal and brilliant, all in one go. Kiko’s story was tough to read but so authentic to experience. I truly loved the sections where it shows what Kiko wanted to say versus what she actually says. It was a great way of showing Kiko’s struggle and the art description at the end of each chapter were beautiful. I loved the writing and the way Akemi wrote this story, as we read about Kiko’s journey accept herself. I found myself connecting with Kiko on so many levels, Starfish was indeed an experience to read.

I will warn you, Bowman did say she wrote this for people who need to see their experiences brought to life, and, boy, she did do exactly that. It was a struggle to read this. Her mother’s behaviour is nauseating to read but felt so real.

Although the romance isn’t a massive subplot in this book, it wasn’t the most enjoyable part of it, partly because of Jamie’s ignorance. I get that he doesn’t understand (spoiler-ish, we learn from one of the reveals, that he sort of does) but there were too many moments where Kiko’s anxiety was being framed as absurd and not usual from his lines. And him submitting Kiko’s art and showing her images to others without her knowledge and permission was teeth-grindingly annoying. We get it, he loves her, but forcing her into certain things wasn’t okay for me.

Overall, Akemi has created a beautiful and emotional story about learning to love yourself when others told you it’s impossible. Read it if you can, it’s not one to be missed.

TW: sexual abuse, racism, emotional abuse, parental abuse/neglect, suicide attempt. (If you’ve read the book and feel like I’ve missed something else, please tell me!)

Possibly one of the nicest covers I've seen for a long time. Starfish is so very very good. It is just lovely but so sad at times. It does a superb job of representing mental illness, in this case, anxiety. At times Starfish can be hard to read due to how honest and raw it is but for me that is what makes it so good.