Okay, so where do I begin with this phenomenal book...

I discovered Lily White not long ago and I'm so glad I did. If anyone can take a story and turn it into something magical, Lily can. With her unique story lines and brilliant character development, my heart literally moved with Crazy Madly Deeply. Though the story itself is a bit long, it never lulled. My interest was captured from the first couple pages and I couldn't stop reading.

Holden Bishop is quite a unique individual. I felt a connection to him almost instantly and he was simply amazing to read about. Never have I encountered a character such as Holden--he was brilliant, genuine, a man of his word.

My emotions were certainly challenged several times throughout the story, but I loved everything about Crazy Madly Deeply. Lily White, you can play with my heart any day because I get such a feeling of completeness after reading one of your stories. Brilliant and well-deserved five stars!

***Thank you to NetGalley, the author and the publisher for the opportunity to read this book. ***

Crazy Madly Deeply, by Lily White, was not the book I thought it was going to be based on the synopsis. And to be honest, I feel alone on an island because this book is sitting at 4.44 stars with 144 ratings and 86 reviews. Clearly, I’m in the minority with how I felt, so you should definitely give this one a try and decide for yourself.

This is Holden’s story, and to a lesser degree, Michaela’s story. They’re opposites in many ways. She’s rich and popular. Holden lives in the rough part of town. He’s a quiet loner, seen as a ”freak” because of how he dresses and because he doesn’t care about what people think of him. His sister Delilah is the light of his life. When Holden witnesses a guy get out of line with his sister, he steps in. He’s made to pay for it later when Michaela’s boyfriend Jack decides to teach Holden a lesson. Jack has no idea—and doesn’t care at all—the damage he sets in motion that night. Two years later, Jack changes the course of Holden’s life again, this time putting Michaela in the path of damage. It isn’t until Michaela spends time with Holden that she realizes she has judged him completely wrong, and Holden realizes the same thing about Michaela. They learn to trust one another and before long they’re falling in love, trying to outrun what Holden sees as the inevitable end once everything comes to light.

This is a hard book to describe without giving away the plot completely. I have to be honest, I’m surprised by how highly rated this book is. To be entirely candid, I thought of DNFing, but I kept reading because NetGalley gave me an opportunity that I took seriously. Maybe the book is just a mismatch for me, but here are my thoughts.

I struggled to respect many of the characters in this book. I couldn’t relax into them, couldn’t enjoy them because I didn’t trust them. Holden had a predisposition to violence that seemed to have a hair trigger. I didn’t trust that Michaela could be truthful or brave. I was put off by the repetitive trope of wealth and power including their treatment of women. I was sickened by it. I was sickened by every character who turned their heads when girls were used and abused in front of them and by those who knew and did nothing. That includes Michaela. There were no rape scenes but it was referred to offhandedly at first, and then took a more serious turn when it was brought up later in the book.

His violent tendencies aside, I did like Holden. He was doing his best with what he had to make a life for himself and take care of his family. I liked Deli. She definitely brought a lightness to the story that provided balance to the parts she was in. I loved Angela. She was a no-nonsense mother figure who loved Holden like a son and protected him with everything she had. I hated Michaela when the story began. By the end, I was indifferent to her. I believed she cared about Holden and I was glad she finally rose to the occasion to protect him and everyone, but I never really believed in her. I couldn’t let go of what she ignored early on. I never understood—not once—why she stayed with Jack, especially after he began to mistreat her. The drugs alone would should have sent her running. Every time she got into his car when he was driving high I got angry at her. Anyway, my point is that the reasons for staying with him seemed weak, so I saw her as weak, even when she stopped being weak and tried to be strong.

I didn’t connect with the writing. Everything was too extreme. Anyone with money could get anything they wanted, including paying off the police force. It just got to be too much. Even the good guys seemed to use money. Yes, they used it to help, but it seemed so incredibly unrealistic. I couldn’t suspend disbelief.

So, at the end of the day, I didn’t really enjoy this book. As I mentioned above, I’m in the minority right now so if you enjoy some angst, characters with tortured pasts who rise above, you should try this book out for yourself. It might be right up your alley.

This book was so much more than I expected!! The synopsis makes it sound like the good girl falling in love with the bad guy trope...and I guess it is, to a point, but it just has such a greater plot than just that. Instead, Lily White presents us with something more complicated and diverse. We get plenty of gender inequality, socioeconomic status and classism. These notions were really the driving force behind the book, and not the romance.

I really enjoyed the characters. Michaela (love the name for obvious reasons) is in a bad relationship with a guy she used to convince herself that she was lucky and happy to be with. It’s ultimately a power dynamic though; she is with him because that’s what rich people do--business relationships to ensure their parents stay happy. In her later years she stops being “happy” around him and sees how messed-up he really is. How she’s been keeping quiet about all the bad things he and his team did to other girls; how she herself is sexually harassed by him all the time.

Holden is the goth who doesn’t fit in. For whatever reason, just for living on the wrong side of the tracks and not looking “cool” he’s hated on. Michaela’s boyfriend and his teammates gun after him constantly, meanwhile he’s just trying to protect his sister, who joined up with this group. Even after high school, the hate doesn’t go away. He’s the outcast and is targeted by Michaela’s boyfriend despite its he who did more harm to Holden than the other way around.

Despite sounding semi-basic, it is far from...Because we’re then dragged into a murder plot, crime, accidents, death, mental illnesses, ect. It’s all out order, so don’t go looking for these from beginning to end. I can’t give all the book’s secrets away.

This book is amazing and I couldn’t put it down!!! The journey the author takes us on is mind-blowing. At first i thought it was a shame that it took all this for the Michaela to break away from her past, but I see now how its really a book of healing--for both her and Holden. This needed to occur so Michaela could work past everything and emerge from this with Holden.

This brings me to their romance...This is by far one of the cutest and best romances. The slow building of it allowed for it to be real, but more so, for them to both see how they missed what was right in front of them for all those years ago. It’s adorable and stomach-tingling and you just want to cheer for them beginning to end.

This is my first Lily White book, so I didn’t know what I wa getting into. Story aside, the writing is flawless and beautiful. The author has a way of writing her descriptions of people and places to be so vivid. Her writing is almost poetic. I will definitely be reading more by her.

Really enjoyed this one although it broke my heart several times over!

Being the first Lily White book I’ve read I wasn’t really sure what to expect. But the gorgeous cover (perfect representation of Holden IMO) and fascinating synopsis drew me in.

Although it sounds like your traditional “bad boy from the wrong side of the tracks and good girl from the wealthy side of town” YA romance novel, what you get is something very different and special.

Labelled “crazy” and seen as the King of Freaks, Holden is perfectly happy not fitting in with the ‘small’ people of Tranquil Falls. He loves his sister, his parents, his guitar and to paint. Everything else is unimportant. He’s counting the days until he can leave this town behind.

Michaela, on the other hand is one of the cool kids. Dating the star of the football team and dancing as part of the cheerleading squad, she is definitely not an outcast.

However each of them end up fighting their own battles that leave them broken.

I don’t want to reveal to much about the plot as I think the beauty of this book is in the discovery. What I will say though is that this book is really well written and is very character driven.

Holden, for example, is such an emotional character who I felt a connection to immediately. He is such a warm, caring and sensitive soul. He experiences such heartbreak and loss, unfair treatment and punishment but still manages to be a wonderful human being with the capacity to love and forgive.

Michaela is initially weak and lets everyone walk all over her but she goes through a huge transformation to become a better person.

I cannot recommend this book highly enough, the only reason I haven’t given it 5 stars is because the pacing lost its way a little mid-way through but that didn’t detract from the powerful story that discusses many issues that society faces today.

Well worth a read and I think Lily White will be on my must read authors list after this!

This book packed an emotional punch. Crazy Madly Deeply pulled me into the story right from the first page and kept my unwavering attention until the very end. While this is a new adult romance at its core, I think what struck me and affected me the most was the relevant and timely message that it delivered.

Tranquil Falls was a town that was divided into two parts: the rich, privileged side, and the poor side. This division was also present in the local high school, where football reigned supreme and your parents’ paychecks and influence decided your worth. It was a landscape of trying to fit in by any means possible, or risk being ostracized by the in-crowd. Holden Bishop was an outcast. He never felt the need to fit in. He knew who he was and walked to the beat of his own drum, much to the chagrin of his fellow classmates. His lack of interest in being like the rest of the athletic/popular herd put a target on his back among the bullies.

It was impossible not to root for Holden. He was such a gifted, self-aware young man whose heart was bigger than that whole town. The only things that mattered to him were his art and his family, especially his younger sister. But it didn’t seem to matter how good of a person he was, or that he just wanted to finish his high school years and leave that corrupt town behind, Tranquil Falls and its entitled citizens just seemed to be a dark cloud hovering over him, hindering him at every turn and opportunity.

As I was reading this book, I could visualize every little detail and scene. I was immediately invested in the characters and the story. There were characters who touched my heart, some I wanted to high five, some I wanted to give an encouraging pat on the back, and a few others that, well, I wanted to see get their comeuppance. I loved the author’s description of being large and small. It demonstrated how the characters who were living the largest were actually the smallest.

Crazy Madly Deeply was a suspenseful, raw, gritty, emotional reading experience, one that I won’t soon forget. This was my first book by this author, and I have since added her other books to my to-be-read list.

*4.5 Stars

Wow! 4.5 stars. This isn’t what I expect from Lily White but as usual the writing is beautiful. The world she created in this story is heartbreaking, dysfunctional, tragic and almost dystopian. The separation in classes, among other elements, reminds me of Atlas Shrugged. I didn’t see the twist coming and it was realistically handled. The characters are well developed and wonderful. Holden as a beautiful, strong, unlucky, dark watcher is fabulous and yummy. How much can one person endure without cracking? Michaela finally came into her own and was there for her man. I think Angela was my favorite and provided some comic relief among all the tragedy. This story was a little too angsty for me but the love that developed among the characters was so beautiful. I voluntarily reviewed an ARC.

4.5 stars

Holden Bishop was a man who stood up for what he believed in. Coming from the poor side of the town, his defiance made him the target of the privileged and ignorant populations.

Michaela Paige was the popular princess everyone wanted to be or be with. Being the daughter of one of the prominent family, she had a life served on a silver platter. But things weren't always what it seemed especially when hers and Holden's life collided to a rude awakening.

I think it'd be hard for anyone not to feel for Holden. I have a lot of respect for him for refusing to be "normal". He learned to endure everything thrown his way.

Michaela on the other hand was the complete opposite. Everything she did had to be thought with careful considerations. Her life was stifling and she had to learn to overcome the fear of expectations.

I've always love Lily White's dark books. If this is how she writes her contemporary romance, I'll love them too. The story wrung out various emotions from anger and hate, to fear and sorrow. I could put myself in the situations and feel for the characters. I also like how the characters evolved throughout the book.

Crazy Madly Deeply is a story of overcoming fear and rising up to stand tall. It would appeal to readers looking for engaging romance that focuses on both love and life.

Note:
I love Angela like crazy lol! I'd one someone like her by my side that's for sure

I have always loved Lily White's writing and this book was no exception. I fell into the story from page one. I have to admit, I'm not a fan of the YA genre, but since this was Lily White, I gave it a chance. I hate to say, but I just didn't enjoy it as much I do her dark reads. I absolutely loved Her Master's Courtesan series!
Thank you for the opportunity to read and review and this book!

"He would always be striking and large"

If I could give a review more than 5 stars, I would give this story an infinity amount of stars, like the ones that Holden would look at from the deserted football field.  I am so glad that I have been introduced to Lily White's work.  She is amazing!

This book, oh I can't even begin to explain the beauty and tragedy in this story. The story of Holden and Michaela is absolute brilliance.

I was so envious of Holden's strength in being himself and making no apologies for it.  His love and dedication to his sister Delilah is nothing short of miraculous. The tragedy of the things that were piled on him was heartbreaking.

I could understand Michaela's "smallness" (when you read this book, and I hope you do, you will understand what I mean). I was angry for the silence she perpetuated, but I understood how she felt.  I was so happy that she found her strength in Holden and I am glad he found a safe place with her.

This twist in this story absolutely floored me! It gutted me and made me ugly cry, which really is a credit to Lily's words and story.

This book is going to be in my best reads of 2018, this book hooked me from the first page and I refused to put it down until the end.  I cannot praise this story enough, nor can I exclaim that you get this book and become as mesmerized by this story as I did.  Well done Lily, I cannot wait to read what comes next!

** spoiler alert ** Thanks Netgalley for a copy to read and review...
My first read by this author and I was hooked. Holden was an excellent character, he had drama, angst, and exudes enough realness to make him an excellent book boyfriend. I really enjoyed this read because it wasn't your average book. The trauma and heart break done to Holden by the town he grew up in was just crazy. What he went through would have broken a strong person. I like how Michaela adapts to the events and finally does right by him. I guess that could be seen as a spoiler. When tragic things happen to us our lives are skewed by being able to accept it. In Holden's case, a rare case, he could not accept what cards life had dealt him and was stuck inside a safe place. I thought it was an intense read and it was very enjoyable. Not enjoyable to see what he had put himself through but if you've ever been through something tragic you just understand. Five stars of entertainment , I was hooked.

Storyline: 5
Angst: 4
Tissue: 1
Value: 5
Panty Scorching: 5
Over All Rating: 4.5 Stars
Kindle eArc provided by Netgalley

Holden sees everything. His artistic soul just is too big for this small town. As he ignores all of the town that calls him a freak, things start surpassing just name calling. Now they want to hurt him. They want to take everything from him. Michaela sees what is going on around her but she’s not strong enough to speak out. She lets her crowd hurt him. But then she really saw him.

“The truth doesn’t matter. It never does for men like me. We’re disposable. An easy answer to lock away so the police look like heroes… Your truth is meaningless. It’s as weak as you. To everybody that matters, it’s an inconvenience that will be shoved aside and forgotten.”

It’s hard to get all my feelings out regarding this emotional YA/NA story. Holden has been deemed the crazy misfit of this town full of entitled kids. His sister Delilah is sort of a fragile snowflake….talented innocent and wanting to fit in with the privileged teens but their family is from the other side of the track. Then you have Michaela…the beautiful, unwilling queen of the sheep. So much of this book is about bullies and crazy stuff that people turn a blind eye to. I just wanted to grab Holden into a hug and protect him from pretty much every single person in this screwed up town. It’s like non-conformists have a target painted on their backs. And the twists in this story! I never quite knew which direction it might take but I was always holding my breath. Great coming of age and overcoming fear of speaking out book. I really enjoyed it.

I loved that this book was not like what I normally expect from Lily White. It still had the signature twist and dark themes. But the younger viewpoint was new for me and I liked it. A good, suspenseful young adult book that encourages speaking out and staying strong.

My first Lily White book and it didn't disappoint. Crazy Madly Deeply hinges itself on the edgy tale of Holden Bishop and the tragedies he sustains in his young adult life. Broken into parts White shows us the before, during, and after the circumstances that have shaped this man. While there is a love story woven into these pages I find myself more enamored with the tragic story of this boy and the romance being a side effect of his own miraculous journey.

Holden Bishop has a very distinct view of the world around him. He understands deeper than the shallow circumstances he's surrounded by and thrust into. There's a shining brilliance to Holden that borders on madness. When someone finally delves into the core of his soul it starts to unravel the madness to let only brilliance filter out. A lot happens as far as plot in this story and an unraveling is the best way I have to describe it. There's a lot of pieces that twist and turn keeping readers on the edge of their seat. It's a dark story, full of grit and honesty from a lost boy worth saving. Lily White's writing here was impressive here as a first reader of hers. They way is able to hook readers without giving everything away and slowly filtering new details into her story. I enjoyed Crazy Madly Deeply and felt each emotional piece of Holden's story within it's pages.

You never enter LilyWorld unprepared. You should be ready to be stun-gunned by the sadistic blackness in her books. That's one thing sure about in this world, after death and taxes.......Or so you'd think!!! But like all Evil Geniuses, she still manages to treat you to a spectacular story filled with every colour of emotion possible with èlan
A rose by any other name would smell just as sweet not that this story is sweet by YA/NA standards, but by Lily standards, it carries poignancy & vulnerability. It's rounded at the corners, softer around the edges but the content is so formidable, you can't ignore it. You MUST NOT ignore it, around you, your school, your community, your town or your country. Again the topic is very contemporaneous and sadly prevalent!
Just like Angela's mean left hook , out of nowhere comes THIS story, of Perspectives, of vantages and Advantages. You see Lily takes you to a remote town of Tranquil Falls. The irony isn't lost on us, it's the most untranquil place in the world. There's social and statistical divide in this town.
the train tracks that cut the town into two unequal halves, the stately mansions holding court on the right while what was referred to as the servants’ quarters plagued the left. 
The poorer or underprivileged kids, esp Delilah and Holden Bishop are pepetually taunted, teased & bullied. Delilah in hopes of getting accepted into the upper clique, follows the school princess Michaela Paige like a puppy.
She desired the limelight, the wealth, the esteem, the friendships of the popular kids who’d gathered together in their exclusive group that believed being worshipped had been their birthright 
Michaela takes Deli under her wing, appreciative of her,But Holden has to hiss and spit on the sidelines, which suits him just fine. The tragic day in the cafeteria has a domino effect on everybody's lives, but more on the Bishops. Their family is torn apart and the kids' futures ruined forever !! Holden is not only an owner of a beautiful body , but a beautiful soul & heart, and immense talent his paint speckled abs. 
Abs that carried the mark of an artist’s trade, the hint of a beautiful mind, the knowledge that within the recesses of that man’s body lay a soul that was far more brilliant and superior than mine. Rational mind kryptonite 
The unfairness meted out to Holden made me so angry, I wanted to bash the bullies' heads and set this tainted and corrupt world on fire ! 
Holden, in comparison, was nothing more than an afterthought, the crazy freak in a town where money, power, and popularity were all that mattered. He was garbage they wouldn’t care to toss away. 
By this time, I had doubts, was I reading a Lily book?!?! Where are the cruel Masters who treat subs like sex slaves , or the Diphallic dude**shudders**😣 or the cannibalistic rednecks or people haunted by sexual abuse who turned into murderers? Instead she does a complete 180° and while we are looking for weapons of Lily's Mass destruction, she punches us in the hearts and makes us cry. 
No make that tear up. No make that bawl our eyes out. 😭. 
Wow !!....just wow!! Never expect the norm from her...lesson learned! The story has a Big Large heart. In a world full of smalls, this story is large, Huge, Giant. The most poignant scene is where Holden is explaining Deli about the smalls of the world. 
“It means that there’s nothing inside you worth notice. That to pretend to be something better than everybody else, you have to drag the good people down to your level instead of rising up to meet the bar they set.” 
And when Michaela ultimately realises Holden's Golden Hour, the brilliant light that shines through him, it's a scene that brought tears to my eyes again. Michaela reaches her guilt threshold pretty soon,the strength of her soul emerging as an admirable entity ❤
I have to tell y'all. My UTMOST FAVORITE line of the story occurs here 
“What would happen if I kissed you right now, Holden Bishop?”
“We would both end up heartbroken.”
“Immediately?"
“Eventually.”
“I can live with eventually.” 
OH. MY. GAWWWD! #CarpeTheFuckingDiem !
So now that you've endured my ramblings...Pick up the book! It'll change you and your perspective, you would start looking at people differently, notice the vulnerable and maybe help them a bit. 
Be Large! Live Large! Forgive Large!
That’s what large people do. They’re so big and so deep and so wonderful that grudges and resentment and anything deemed ugly are crushed beneath the weight of their virtue.
Holden Bishop was a soul that would always be brilliant. He would always be striking and large. 
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
5 "Broken Bird" stars

This is not my normal read but I was so moved by the crafting and talent of the author. Highlighting - things are Never what we think they are...This is a tale which will take you down a road of emotions which will cut deep.

Crazy Madly Deeply by Lily White is the story of HOLDEN and MICHAELA.
Holden was different and was okay with that in many ways. Michaela was a hurt sole that knew about abuse and yet didn't stop it when her so called 'friends' tried to abuse Holden. Holden understood the brokenness in Michaela where others didn't.
Holden was easy character to fall in love with where Michaela even with her abusive past was hard to watch as she let things happened. But at the end she did start to get stronger and the two became what each needed.
Enjoyed their story.

Crazy Madly Deeply
Let those words sink in, those three words describe every bit of the words on this book.
Holy cow, I’m not sure if I can adequately describe the emotions I had reading this book. I do warn you have the tissues ready. You will need them.
Holden, Michaela, Deli and Angela were amazing. These characters grew with every page. Even Jack the male antagonist played his part too well.
Then plot twist, what?, no wait I need to go back. No way! Yup totally missed that one.
In my best Blanche Devereaux voice “I was devastated just devastated”

It’s a must read. I totally love it. Go one click!
Happy Reading!

3.5 STARS!!!!
Crazy Madly Deeply is my very first read from this author. She definitely has a way of writing a story that captures you from the very beginning. I finished this book in one sitting. I know I'm in the majority here with my rating but it's hard to fall in with a book when you dislike the majority of characters. I absolutely loved Holden, Delilah and his family. He was the best brother a sister could have and I was completely devastated when I found out the truth about what really happened. I liked Kaley and I loved Angela's character also. Angela treated Holden as if he was her son and he needed that tough love and support. I enjoyed their back and forth banter. I can't even begin to describe how much I hated Jack and Michaela. There was no way for her to redeem herself for me. She is one of the weakest characters I have ever come across in a book and I hated her. She didn't deserve one ounce of love from Holden and I wished he had found someone better. This book had a sweet ending and Holden deserved everything and more, it was time for him to be happy. This book will definitely take you on an emotional journey and I even though it wasn't a 5 star read for me, it's one story worth reading.

Wow. This book was not at all what I was expecting.

I'll be honest, I was expecting the usual troupe of the outcast and the popular girl coming together in high school and there being outrage and then a happily ever after. With this book, we get SO MUCH MORE.

This book is not a beach read. It's not a fun book to pick up because you need something light and swoon worthy. This book is dark and intense. It deals with mental health issues, violence, sexual assault, and corruption.

I can't even begin to say how much I loved all of these characters. I loved how Michaela went from being so small to someone so large. Her journey throughout the book was both real and heart felt. I loved all the support that she showed Holden in his life and with his sister.

Holden was a beautiful, broken man. Life handed him some pretty terrible cards but he still landed on two feet. A little wobbly, but he was making the best of his life. His protectiveness and caring he gives to the people he cares about was inspiring and wonderful.

I highly recommend this book. Again, it is not a fun, light read so make sure you go into this expecting a heavier story.

Lily White surely is one magnificent writer. She can write the darkest, most grittiest books and then she can write the most profound books that deal with real life stuff.

Crazy Madly Deeply touched my heart like no other book ever has. It talks about things that happen in real life, things kids go through in school, whether you're rich or poor. The wealthy versus the poor. When you're rich you have the world at your finger tips and when you're poor you have nothing and no one to back you up regardless of the circumstances.

Holden and Michaela really were one magnificent duo. The things these kids go through and what they have to experience is tough and it gave me all the feels that I don't think I've ever felt before.

I think this has been my best read from Ms. White to date and the other books I've read from her before have been excellent, but this one has really moved me.

I can honestly say that this book deserves more than 5 stars because it really moved me. Holden is my hero and Michaela was my heroine.

I know enough about the author's style of writing to know the titles always have significance to the story!
A top read of 2018!
Nothing prepared me for what I just read. This read is easily worthy of 10 stars! The author's story just keep getting more complex, more thought thought provoking, just better.
Flawless writing, with real realistic and flawed characters that just came to life, and shared their story.
Intense, haunting, and gut wrenching. For me, I'm in a tail spin of emotions after reading this incredible thought provoking story.
I knew characters like them so I understood every emotion and every doubt of Holden, Deli, and Michaela. Even the scumbag villain Jack was portrayed so realistically.
This story has so many underlying meanings, I feel my words won't do it justice. Holden's story was turbulent and bittersweet story that articulated the ugliness of people as well as the beauty of the human spirit.
In the end it was a journey of self discovery love and acceptance!
A must read!!