I always have a hard time giving a negative review to a memoir - I know how incredibly brave it is to share one's story. I greatly appreciated Legler's honesty and willingness to share painful memories that don't always present her in the best light. However, this book was extremely difficult to get through (despite it being short in length). Legler's writing is hard to follow and doesn't always have appropriate punctuation to help guide the reader. I felt like I was stumbling over sentences and trying to grasp her meaning throughout every page. Legler does have a unique perspective: living in France and the US, struggling with what would later be diagnosed as Asperger's, becoming an Olympic athlete. The bummer is that she spends very little time talking about any of these things - the book is mainly a muddled account of her drug and alcohol abuse and hookups with a different person on nearly every page. There's certainly no judgment here - I would have just loved to learn more about how her experiences shaped her instead of just getting details of the events and an abrupt ending while she's still in the midst of her addiction. I was even more disappointed when I read the author's note; it seems the most captivating parts of her life were not described at all (competing in the Olympics, being one of the first women to model men's clothing, graduating from college despite her rocky early adulthood, etc.). This memoir was such a mess, which is a shame since Legler has led such a fascinating life.

This was just a brutal autobiography. Godspeed tracks Legler's youth from a swimming prodigy to Olympian to addict, and the prose style follows her mental status: as an awkward teenager with undiagnosed Asperger's Syndrome who begins to make questionable choices in order to feel "normal," the prose is also awkward and confusing; as she begins to spiral into depression and nihilism where even her Olympic experience feels meaningless, the writing nonchalant; as a college student who descends into horrifying addiction and madness, the story is chaotic and nearly incomprehensible at times. Throughout it all, Legler writes with a profound detachment, as if she is only watching all of these things happen and not actually experiencing or participating - and this does make it a little difficult as a reader to feel engaged with the story. Regardless, Legler definitely has a way with words.