Member Reviews
This is a very helpful book -- to be prepared in advance for when you inevitably encounter a gaslighter. Unfortunately gaslighters have an outsize negative effect, so this book is invaluable preparation.
This is an informative book detailing what gaslighting is, and how it can happen in various areas of your life--including ways that you perhaps didn't recognize as gaslighting.
If you've ever had the misfortune of dealing with this sort of toxic behavior, I think you'll find this book to be helpful in learning how to cope and heal from it.
One needs to recognize and practice what's given in this book daily to get the patterns out of mind and heart and life. I think a toxic relationship can be called gaslighting or vice versa. The way information and examples are presented is very helpful. Thanks.
Thanks to the publisher for the ARC.
Gaslighting by Stephanie Moulton Sarkis is a highly recommended examination of the titular technique that is used, often by those with personality disorder, to manipulate others to gain control.
Gaslighting is a term that has been used more frequently lately and it would benefit everyone to know what it means and how a gaslighter operates. "The word frenemy was probably invented for gaslighters." Gaslighters are masters of exerting control and psychological manipulation in others. Their manipulation is often slow as they begin to have you questioning your memories, sense of reality, self-worth, and perception. The name comes from the 1938 stage play Gaslight, and became more common after the 1944 movie starring Ingrid Bergman, Charles Boyer, and Joseph Cotton. According to Sarkis, some gaslighters meet the American Psychiatric Association's DMS criteria for several Cluster B Personality Disorders (including Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Antisocial Personality Disorder, and Borderline Personality Disorder).
Sarkis organizes her well-written and informative book in a logical fashion. There are many examples and quotes from people who have experienced gaslighting first hand and Sarkis provides examples of warning signs along with practical tips and strategies for those who have or are experiencing this behavior from others. (And perhaps will help some identify some of the traits of a gaslighter in their own life.) Ultimately, the goal is to help people break free and heal from their experiences with this toxic behavior.
Chapters are organized to cover: 1) A look at the various ways gaslighters manipulate people. 2) Help you identify if you are in a gaslighting relationship. 3) A look at the red flags to look for on a first date. 4) Gaslighting in the workplace. 5) An examination of different types of abuse and if they apply to your relationships. 6) Gaslighting in politicians and dictators. 7) Gaslighting in cults and extremist groups. 8) How to deal with a parent who is a gaslighter. 9) Gaslighters in friendships (or emotional vampires.) 10) Copeing with a gaslighting ex or ex's new partner. 11) Guidance for anyone who thinks they have been gaslighting others. 12) Counseling and treatment for protecting yourself and healing from a gaslighter’s behavior. At the back of the book are numerous resources to provide further help to anyone who is interested.
Disclosure: My review copy was courtesy of Da Capo Press.
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I had never heard the term Gaslighting until my husband came home and used the word at first I laughed but soon found out Gaslighting is more than a funny word it is very serious issues that has been around for hundreds of years,
This book gives insight for readers a on understand why someone would do this to another person as well as when you ourselves have been accused of it. the author give clear definition so that everyone reader the book will understand both sides of Gaslighting.
Stephanie Moutlon Sarkis gives amazing insight into a this problem and how to solve and work though the issues that arise from this happening to you or friends.
I feel this book should be required readers for anyone in high school though the working world.
Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for the Advance copy of Stephanie Moulton Sarkis Gaslighting
A useful primer on gaslighting that will help readers understand and recover from relationships with toxic individuals. Sarkis covers gaslighting exhibited by spouses, parents, friends, and colleagues, noting the warning signs and offering numerous examples to show how gas lighters manipulate their victims. In addition to helping victims, this book might help you identify your own unhealthy behaviors and re-evaluate past relationships that felt somehow "off."
This was a very helpful book. I began reading it because I thought the concept of gaslighting related to a coworker, but it actually resonated much more powerfully in regards to a couple of other personal relationships. I have spent a lot of emotional time and energy trying to understand why these relationships worked the way they did, and this book brought all of the seemingly unrelated elements together for me in ways that I think will be rather beneficial to me moving forward.
I found the book well-written, and useful both in understanding how gaslighters behave, how relationships with them can cause emotional fallout, and the eminently practical advice about coping in situations where you have a gaslighter in your life.
All I can say to others is, if you intuitively feel like this book may apply to you, I suggest you read it, as it may well apply to your life in a different manner than you otherwise expect.
Powerful, and so necessary. Unfortunately I am reading this book for someone that is in this situation. Thankfully this book gives me some insight. Hopeful for the person to get out. Book is way more than 5 stars!
Thanks to author,publisher and Netgalley for the chance to read this book. While I got the book for free, it had no bearing on the rating I gave it.