This YA novel tried to be a lot of things--cheerleaders are more than stereotypes, a heartfelt LGBTQP book, a book about family, about a mental breakdown...but none of these threads were interesting or paid off in the end. I left it feeling like I'd wasted my time.

I've read some books with unlikable protagonists. I'm generally kind of glad to see them because they mix it up a little. And I kind of love when you end up rooting for them despite yourself.

This was not that kind of book.

The story centers on Jenna and her rapidly devolving relationship with her best friend. Jenna is understandably upset by this situation and acts out badly as a result. This wouldn't be so terrible in and of itself- lots of us have lashed out in grief or frustration- but Jenna takes it to some pretty severe extremes. The problem is that there's never a time I find myself rooting for her. There's never a moment when I think maybe her actions are justified or I can at least rationalize them by figuring this is how teenagers think. Because it's not. This is a character who is pretty terrible and somehow never faces any real consequences for her actions, despite them being blatant and awful.

That said, some of the supporting characters definitely made the book worth reading for me. The minor players all felt much less static than Jenna and I appreciated that.

This was just alright for me. The book felt overly weighed down with cliches and stereotypes despite trying so desperately to be fresh.

A brief summary: Jenna is a cheerleader, but she wants you to know she isn't a stereotypical cheerleader. The story follows her as she has a mini-breakdown after the fallout with her former best friend, Raejean. Jenna has an identity crisis and doesn't even seem to know who she is anymore, but after initially losing herself and her best friend, she begins to find a new version of herself.

Things I Liked (usually I would write loved, but I’m not sure I felt that strongly):
- Gemma/James -- I was intrigued by Gemma/James’ character being transgender. It didn’t feel over the top, and the arc here seemed to relate more to the relationship James has with Jenna, rather than him being transgendered. It was nice to see that character in the novel; however, it felt tossed in there and underdeveloped. I almost the book had deleted all of the Raejean nonsense at the beginning and just made itself about Jenna and James. That seemed to be the closest the book got to being authentic.

Things I Didn't Like:
- The sex/drugs content -- While I'm not typically one to censor a novel, I felt like the references to drugs and sex were a bit over the top and unnecessary. It could be because I actually coach cheer, but I would be furious if my athletes participated in this behavior as often as it is portrayed in the book. ESPECIALLY for a team that consistently places well and takes itself so seriously. Obviously, I don't want to think of myself as a naive adult, but I think it's unrealistic that their coach couldn't notice all these behaviors within them and that they wouldn't negatively take a toll on their athletic abilities. Also, while I typically don't have huge problems with sexual content, the sexual content in this book appeared right away, and it felt like it was simply for shock value. The main character describes a lot of "sexual fantasies" with a little too much detail... It's one thing when sexual content is later in the book after it's been built up and developed, but it's another when it's thrown in in the very beginning just to prove the main character isn't a stereotype. It just felt forced.
- Speaking of stereotypes... For a book that tried to break the mold of stereotypes, it felt like there were a lot -- Jenna's brother is a "goth" who is into LARP-ing. That's pretty much all the development he got. Jenna "isn't a ditz" but then I didn't see much more to her character other than her mental breakdown. The cheerleaders are supposed to be serious athletes, but they all just come off like the popular crowd from any teen movie ever.
- Lack of development - Jenna goes to great lengths to explain her past with Raejean, but then she never really explains why all the sudden she switched into this mental breakdown. It would be one thing if Jenna spent most of the book trying to figure out why she can't even pinpoint what made her come apart, but it seems like the author (and Jenna) don't even care that she's suddenly losing it. It just felt awkward, and the only thing I knew about their friendship was that they shared sexual fantasies over some guy, so I wasn’t really that invested when Jenna decided she suddenly hated her.
- This book seems all over the place -- I wasn’t sure if it was trying to prove to me that cheer is more than we think, if it was a novel about female friendship, if it was a novel about sexuality and fluid relationships, if it was a novel about a mental health breakdown, or if it was a novel about discovering oneself. It just felt really disjointed, and none of the plotlines really came together. The closest thing I felt to a really developed idea was that Jenna “finds herself” while LARP-ing. The author could’ve done something great with Jenna and James, but it was over after one date.

Overall: I'm not likely to recommend this one. It was trying too hard, and I don't think many of its points ever really landed and felt fresh. It felt underdeveloped and inauthentic.

I received a complimentary copy of this book from MacMillan Children's Publishing through NetGalley. Opinions expressed in this review are completely my own. The book will be published on March 12, 2019.

This one was just okay for me - I couldn't relate to Jenna at all, and a lot of her decisions seemed to come out of nowhere. I will probably purchase it for my classroom library when it's published, but it wasn't a hugely successful book for me.

I thoroughly enjoyed this! The synopsis made it seem like revenge was the biggest plot of the book, but it read more like a coming of age/figuring out life story (with a bit of revenge sprinkled in). Nevertheless, It was a quick, fun read and my students will definitely relate to Jenna and her struggles.

I loved this book! The full review will be posted soon at kaitgoodwin.com/books! Thank you very much for this wonderful opportunity to connect books to their readers!