This is a beautifully heartbreaking and harrowing story of a girl, who at 17 is put in the foster care system after she realises her father is not at all the man she thought he was.

This is such a heartbreaking and wrenching story of a young girl, on the cusp of adulthood having to confront things that cause her a great deal of pain and sadness. This book is brilliant and I loved every moment of it. It was definitely one of my highlights of 2018!

Thank you for the chance to get an early copy of this book. I think this book fills a need that I have not read in other YA literature. The topics covered in this book are handled with tender loving care and as the reader I was truly moved. The characters are well developed and I plan on adding this book to our collection.

I knew there was something weird about this book when I first saw it, but I can honestly say I had no idea this book would be about sexual abuse. I don’t know if I would have requested it had I know what it was about. Saying all of that, it wasn’t a bad book, it just covers several unsettling topics.


First things first, I didn’t give this book three stars because of the difficult things that take place throughout the story. Things like what happened in the book, happen everyday, and they’re horrible no matter the circumstance. This was a good book, the way the main character, Victoria, changes throughout the story is very real and easy to relate to. The author did a wonderful job of explaining the way Victoria was feeling and how confused she was throughout the book that made it easier for those of us who have never gone through something like this.

There were lots of great characters in this book as well. With Victoria being the oldest at their foster mother Connie’s house she feels a little responsible for the younger kids. Jamie is the one who opens Victoria’s eyes and makes her realize that she needs to take care of her sister Sarah. Christina and Kale love Victoria despite her hiding the fact that she was in foster care. I think Christina was my favorite character though. She always stood up for Victoria and kept her out of trouble because Victoria could not afford to get into trouble. That’s how true friends are supposed to be and that’s why she was my favorite.


Thank you NetGalley and Flux for an advanced copy of this book in return for an honest review.

“None of us can understand what’s going on in another person’s life from the outside looking in. No one can really see the quiet you carry, unless you let them.”

Truer words have never been written. Everyone in this world has, or is, going through something that shakes us to the core and completely changes our lives - sometimes it’s good, and sometimes it’s not, and other times it is deeply traumatic. Some people are better at hiding it than others. I know I was, and to a degree, I still am.

Barthelmess tackles several very serious issues in this book, and they were done so masterfully and sensitively. She really gets into the head of a teenage girl who is struggling with the awful reality that she has found herself in, but is not yet ready, or is unable to confront it.

I identified so much with Victoria and all she went through, reliving my own experiences, remembering my feelings and fears as I read about hers. And if I were to use one word to describe the result it would be: genuine.

The Quiet You Carry is very confronting and it may be a trigger for some people, so please take care and read with caution.

Thank you to Nikki Barthelmess, North Star Editions/Flux, and NetGalley for an arc of this compelling book in exchange for an honest review.

Thank you #Netgalley for allowing me to read #Thequietyoucarry as an advanced reader copy., Ms Barthelmess has a tour'dforce of YAlit, definately five stars , and if Netflix, Touchstonepictures or other production company hasn't offered a movie deal for this book they better not wait long. Readers who loved A Fault in Our Stars or A Walk To Remember will be in a complete book hangover for A Quiet You Carry, I feel this story will also become as significant as 13 Reasons Why, and will be one parents will talk about with their teens.
Victoria is the first protagonist in a very long time that I felt should have an interview after the story was over, She is that friend you had that smiled bravely despite her world falling apart around her. That student that every teacher had sitting by herself , without a coat or a second pair of shoes . A girl we see getting off the bus trying to smile ,but holding back the t.ears. I know those monsters Victoria dreamed of, that she desperately wanted to set free, Every child who ever has lived through abuse were not taken safely away by CPS, and tough as Connie was, she was doing her best as a fostermom, but not all children are lucky to end up with a Connie . In this story, it will make you think, please make sure to share the contact numbers of CASA with a child you may think needs it. There are so many raw and real topics explored in this story, foster care ,abuse, cutting as a sign that a child needs emotional help. The Quiet You Carry should be shared by librarians, reading groups, and high school english classes. The Quiet You Carry is that nightmare that if we are lucky we are able to set free.
The cover: gorgeous
The characters : five star memorable.
The author: Best Debut Author of 2019...

Wow. That was raw and emotionally brutal.

I will not recover from The Quiet You Carry, but that's kinda the point.
Like most people, I'm aware of foster kids, went to school with some, knew of some foster parents in my small town growing up, but I never really understood the deep emotions of those involved. And I don't think I ever will fully understand what those kids go through. This book will help empathize and shed light on a whole world most of us know only a little bit about.

It should be a no brainer, but this book has all the trigger warnings. As I was reading it, it brought up every pain I remember feeling in junior high and high school. And I had a pretty easy time compared to most! If you're in any way feeling depressed, or anxious, or alone ... just be careful before starting this book. It's going to hurt, but hopefully you'll feel cathartic at the end (which is as happy an ending as can be).

Barthelmess writes in a way that's gripping and holds your attention. The story moves quickly and there are no extraneous words, sentences or scenes. Everything is important. You're inside Victoria's head as she's trying to resolve what happened to her and her new life in foster care at the same time. The constant back and forth between PTSD and trying to attend high school is unsettling. As a reader we're never sure when Victoria's mind might trigger a memory or gut reaction to something others may find mundane. In that way, the storytelling is perfect and truly accomplishes Barthelmess' goal.

I received a copy from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Story: 5 stars
Character Development: 5 stars
Writing/Prose: 4 stars

The Quiet You Carry is realistic and heartbreaking with an element of suspense as Victoria suffers from PTSD and struggles to keep up with the lies she's told for self-preservation. The character development and backstories are remarkable all around, from Victoria to Connie to Christina. While this book provides excellent representation of a child in the foster care system, it may not be for everyone due to the amount of triggers for everything from sexual abuse to self-harm, to eating disorders, and more.

“No one can really see the quiet you carry, unless you let them.”


4,5 stars


Thank you Flux, North Star Edition for giving me this book through Netgalley! As usual this had no influence on my willing and honest opinion!


The author in her acknowledgement explains how she was put in foster care when young and how she had no idea what that was before entering the system.

She gives what I think must be a very accurate description of foster care, with its overworked social workers, with foster parents enforcing strict rules, with kids thrown into it in the peak of a crisis and being left disoriented, groggy from what has been and is happening.


You’ve guessed from the synopsis that Victoria entered foster care after something her dad has done to her.

This first scene was brutal.

She was taken away by a police officer and a social worker and they were brusque with her.

Victoria had to leave everything behind: her phone, her computer anything of value and take only clothes with her.

She’s slept the night on a couch in the social worker’s office.

If this is not traumatizing, especially when added to what happened with her dad I don’t know what is!


From that moment on she will live with two other foster girls in the care of Connie. Connie is her foster mom and she had such strict rules that the girls hated her.

I confess that Connie’s character was very hard to like but that’s the beauty of this story: nothing is to be taken at face value and many characters hide their true self behind a mask!


This story shows the limits of the foster system and of justice. In case of abuse it’s the victim’s word against the aggressor. If the victim is mute because she is afraid of the consequences, she’ll be thrown into a very hard system.


Victoria will rage more than once again this system and against what is happening to her. She will also live in denial because like most victims she will have great difficulties to go against the perpetrator.

This book highlights how manipulator can perpetrate abuse and have the victims think this is not so serious. Victims often feel a sense of loyalty and obligation to their abuser as sick as that may seem.

Victoria’s dad was one of the worst manipulators.

He manipulated Victoria’s mom who convinced Victoria that a woman had to do everything to keep the husband happy. She also entrusted her husband into Victoria’s hands leaving her feeling responsible for her dad’s happiness. Hence not wanting to condemn him even after what he’s done.


This is a complex story as the characters go through a tempest of emotions and contradictory feelings. In this again the author did an excellent job portraying teenagers thrown into foster care and having to deal with being a victim. Coming to term with what has been done to them. Accepting their new situations is not easy! They are told they should make “the most of it” but most of the time they’ve been through trauma and landing in a stranger’s house, leaving all your friends behind really leaves you …lost.


I had no problem at all walking in Victoria’s shoes. She was solidly fleshed out as were the side characters as well. The friendship and budging romance helped alleviate some of the gloom and offered Victoria the support she needed. Because amidst all the drama, she remained a teenage girl who wanted to assimilate, to blend in, to live a normal life.


“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” I sob. “I couldn’t. It’s humiliating. It’s sick. It’s wrong. These aren’t normal problems. I just want to be normal.”


Recommend it? Totally!

This is truly a heart-wrenching story. It's the kind of book that will stay with you for a while because it pulled on all of your heart strings and made you cry. This story focuses on Victoria, our main character, who has suddenly been kicked out of her home by her father and forced into foster care just a few months before turning 18. Readers don't get all of the backstory immediately, so you learn about Victoria's past and the relationship between her and her father gradually as the story goes along. And unless your heart is made of stone, you will feel reeled in.

Sexual assault and child abuse are very hard topics to approach because they need to be handled correctly. An author cannot go into a story with no understanding of the effects it has on children without completely ruining the message. Nikki Barthelmess handled this so well. This is just a personal opinion, but the topic was handled really delicately and without any harsh stereotypes or insensitivity. These kind of stories need to be told, but the right way. Readers get a close look at the family dynamic in Victoria's home. We are not simply catapulted in to an awful situation to try and figure out how Victoria got there. Instead, Barthelmess takes us all the way back to the beginning and shows us the relationship between Victoria and her father, mother, stepmother, and stepsister. There is a lot going on in this, but it's not overwhelming (at least not in that sense, though the emotions can be). We're also given a fairly realistic look at being a foster child at several different ages (thanks to Victoria's foster sisters Jamie and Lizzie).

The plot is fairly slow-paced, and the book is pretty short, but for this type of story where readers gain information and insight as the story builds, this works. The last few chapters of the book speed up a bit to wrap everything up, which is one thing I think could've been tweaked a little. I'm glad that readers get some closure from this story, but I personally would've liked an extra chapter or two to really carry out the ending the way that Victoria, Sarah, and Jamie deserve.

The characters all shocked me. In a lot of books, we see development of the main character, and maybe minimal development of a supporting character or two to feed the story. However, in this one, it felt like practically all of the characters were developed for us. Victoria gets a lot of new people in her life thanks to being put into foster care, and for such a short novel, I didn't think we'd learn so much about all of the people around her. Even Connie, who I really didn't care for, has layers beneath her hard foster mother exterior. The friends that Victoria make don't just add to the story but they get a little piece of their own in there, too. It isn't often that I get to see so many contributing characters get legitimate story lines, but I really liked it.

Overall, this is definitely one that I'll remember for a while. I was pulled in, my heart was shattered, and I was proud of Victoria in the end. She became her own beacon of hope, and if you love a story like that, then definitely check this out.

This book was nothing like I ever read. I really enjoyed the way the author tackled the subject matter. I do believe it was a little slow at times, but it still gave a me a good story.I was on the edge of my seat most of the time reading this book. The emotions, characters, and relationships all felt real and genuine. We get a few instances of "don't judge a book by its cover" which I also appreciated and found fit well in this story. If you're looking for a story that will have you hooked from the beginning than this is the book for you.

I would like to thank NetGalley and Flux/North Star Editions for presenting me with an ARC of The Quiet You Carry by Nikki Barthelmess for my honest and unbiased review.

Nikki jumped right out and grabbed me with the first page of her book. Victoria’s father throws her out of their home she shared with him, her step-mother, and her step-sister Sarah in the middle of the night in the bitter cold with no coat, no shoes, just the clothes on her back. Victoria ends up at CPS to sleeping on their couch until morning comes and they can put her into the foster system.

Nikki brings us a story with a subject that nobody likes to hear about, not alone talk about it or read about it. Nikki had quite a bit of knowledge of how well the foster system operates being a former foster child herself. She captured all the characters and Victoria’s story so vigorously that came out in a heart wrenching and heartbreaking story that you will not soon forget.

Would I recommend this book? Yes, I would highly recommend The Quiet You Carry, but know that you may get angry, cry, and maybe even have to put it down sometimes. However, when you are done you will be glad you picked it up and read Victoria’s story.

I received a free copy from netgalley in exchange for an honest review. This is the first book I have read by this author. The subject matter is difficult but Nikki handles it delicately. I think this is a meaningful book that is important to read to see a side of the world that ppl tend to ignore because it's not easy or pleasant.

This book is about a girl who fell through through the cracks. An abused little girl. The Quiet You Carry is a very real story that unfortunately happens to thousands around the world everyday. Luckily for Victoria, she was able to get out. Many do not.

This book hooked me in right away. Victoria’s story is both heartwarming and heartbreaking. I grew to love her and even her foster mom. This story touches on such hard subject but does so with grace.

Loved it !!

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This is one of those books where you find yourself rooting for the main character, Victoria the entire way. She was a well written, complex character and I felt so much love for her. I felt the plot was unique and interesting. This was a one click read and I could not put it down. The way this book was written was also heartbreaking at some of the very realistic things that happen through the system. The writer defn knew her stuff. Overall I give this 5 stars!

Thank you Net Galley,
Even tho this book was very predictable, I really!!y enjoyed this novel. I cried at times . I want to read more about Victoria ,

I love most books that I read. However, this one wasn't able to grab my attention. Victoria was a hard main character to like or feel sorry for because of her decisions. She made absolutely everything in her life harder for herself, for the sake of continuing the story, like not wanting to be close to her friends, smarting off to her foster mother, not sticking up for herself. I actually found myself enjoying the subplots of her new best friend's lives more than I enjoyed hers. They were more likeable characters and better rounded than Victoria was. Because I had such a hard time with Victoria, it was hard to get into the story but when I would get into it, I was drug back out of it by whole pages missing or random pages inserted, sometimes with the same scene happening differently. I tried to get through it but it just got to be too much and too often. I couldn't finish the book because of that. This wasn't ready to be given out yet. Had those extra/missing pages been fixed, I would have finished this book and probably at least given it a 4 star review because I was able to get into it at times, although most of it was slow for me, but the editing kept pulling me away and out of the story. I understand those changes will be fixed come publishing time and that editing is to be ignored when reading an ARC, but they were too abundant and rampant for me to fully be able to focus on the story at hand. It was a good plot and thought provoking, from the almost 70% I read, though. Because my main issue was with the editing so far, I will not be publishing my review anywhere but at NetGalley.

Life can be so damn cruel. Life can happen suddenly. And life can unexpectedly pull the rug right from under you. When that happens, you land flat on your ass or back and get the wind knocked right out of you. Once you have a second to catch your breath, look around and take note in the fact that you are at the lowest point possible. But more importantly pay attention to the fact that you have the option to stand up, again. And that is what stuck out to me most about The Quiet You Carry.

Imagine having a secure idea of the future. You have plans to attend college on the dime of your lawyer dad, a stepsister who isn't quite like Cinderella's and some friends that have gotten you through some of the worst. Now imagine that all disappearing in the blink of an eye. And on top of that you are forced from your home into the home of a stranger who takes in foster kids to live off of the government provided funds. This is now the life you lead. And why? Because of action that are no fault of your own. Your whole world ripped away in a flash because of something you never did, wanted or had any control over. And the only option you have is to sit back and swallow the bitter ass pill forced down your throat. Now you've met Victoria Parker...

What I loved about this story was the support Barthelmess offered to readers. There is the piece dealing with entering the foster system. While it is heartbreaking, it is the sad reality for nearly 500,000 kids in the US alone. While the statistic is staggering, you can tell Barthelmess wanted to reach those kids who might feel alone and lost. Mission was accomplished there. There is the piece about keeping a terrible secret because you are ashamed or you want to protect someone. This was a pretty major struggle for Parker. Many of us adult readers, simply might not understand why no one would not come forth. But Barthelmess provides insight into another view, she ensured that readers understood the logic behind it the struggle of staying quiet or not. Also, I think she did an amazing job letting readers know the importance of a support system. What she did best was set Victoria on a path to better herself. While Victoria struggle and suffered, she looked toward a future. She wanted to move on. And I think this was one of the strongest lessons of this story.

Overall, I rated this story with 4 stars because I found myself a bit annoyed with our narrator at times. But I think that comes with the territory of being a 17 year old girl. So if I am being fair, Barthelmess execution of a 17 year old girl is spot on!

Thank you NetGalley and North Star Editions for an advance copy of The Quiet You Carry. I think this story has great potential to touch many young adults.

The ratings and reviews were exceptional for this read, but it didn't do anything for me.

Victoria was bland. She made horrible decisions and if she only spoke up from the beginning then she wouldn't be in her current situation. The summary is misleading since it makes you think that Victoria is spending every waking moment in foster care fretting about her stepsister being stuck at home with her creepy dad. Instead, Victoria spends her days hating her foster mom, being a social piranha at her new school, catching the attention of the hottest guy there, befriending the prettiest girl there who only likes her because "she's different than everyone else", and lying to her peers about her life.

She doesn't even consider the impact of leaving her stepsister behind until after the 70% mark, and by then months have passed since Victoria was placed in foster care. This story was about Victoria being uprooted from everything she knew, relocating hours away to a small town, making new friends, acquiring a boyfriend, and coming to terms that she has a future even though she's in foster care.

I spent a lot of time frustrated over Victoria's decisions (and lack of decisions) because like I mentioned earlier, things would have been solved sooner if she had just spoken up. This is a me issue since I cannot stand people who mope about and suffer when they have the power to speak up and change their surroundings. I also wasn't a fan of the memories within a memory within a memory. Like inception but more confusing. Victoria would be in a present moment, something would trigger a memory and then the memory would unfold, but then half of that memory triggered another, then the present world inserted for a second, then back to memory one. It was difficult to tell past from present based on the way this was written.

As for the strength of this misleading read, I liked Connie's transformation once she and Victoria started to bond. There's really not much more I can say about this read. It wasn't mind blowing nor will it sit with me after I finish this review.

Thanks NetGalley for the ARC.

The Quiet You Carry by Nikki Barthelmess is a heartbreaking story that will have you hooked from the first page. I flew through this novel because I had to find out what happened to Victoria. The subject matter might be for older readers but I believe it was an eye opener on the foster care system. Great Read