Love this book so much! Such encouraging words remind me that it's not about me, sanctification over self-help. Trying to do it all alone without the help from Holy Spirit is just plain silly, we were given the helper.

Sick of Me: From Transparency to Transformation by Whitney Capps

5 stars

Sick of Me is a fantastic Christian Living novel that packs one of the hardest and softest punches the Holy Spirit can hit you with. Whitney Capps talks in her opening chapter how she told a friend how that she was “sick of me” and then friend said in response that she should talk less of her and more about Jesus. This book tackles what a lot of women’s ministries struggle with: transparency and the lack of transformation. Often times, women want to confess, but not be changed. This novel looks at the important process of sanctification (the change that happens when we partner with the Holy Spirit to actively be changed and for our chains to brake without the guilt and shame, but the joy of Jesus). This novel is so important for women who are actively involved in the church whether it’s leading small groups or discipling. It’s important to not get stuck in the transparency trap of not allowing Jesus to transform us. This book was so convicting and each chapter looks at both the Old and New Testament and how Scripture guides us to accepting the process of sanctification through the glory of Christ and not through the glory of ourselves. I absolutely loved Sick of Me. I would go as far as saying that this is the book I’ve read all year. Even topping my favorite fiction read. I was convicted, challenged, and reminded of who Jesus is and who I am not and how that’s a good thing. For insight into what this book covers, I will list the chapters and my favorite quote from each chapter:
*Sick of Me “[Sanctification] is something that the Holy Spirit does in and through us to make us become more like Christ—that’s God process in us. But at the same time, we cooperate with His promptings to become more like Christ through obedience—that’s our pursuit."
*Happiness Over Holiness “We take God’s place on the throne of our hearts. When we unseat the sovereign Lord, we always take His place.”
*Set Apart “The overwhelming truth of Scripture is clear: Sanctification requires surrender. Holiness isn’t the pursuit of happiness. Holiness is the pursuit of Christ.”
*Separate is Hard, Hard is Good, God is Best “I bet some of us are root-bound. We are still green, but we’re not growing. We’ve dug in and refused the Lord’s transplanting of us… We are alive, but we aren’t thriving.”
“God’s goodness or grace us is unmerited, meaning we don’t deserve or earn it. He isn’t kind toward us because we are worthy; He is kind to us because He is worthy.”
*The Process is the Point “Our strong and tender God is completely competent to lead us. He knows all the move to take. He knows the rhythm of our life perfectly; He wrote the music. He isn’t making it up as He goes along. It’s all been perfectly orchestrated since the beginning of time. At the end of the day, this dance of sanctification is God’s process to lead. He’s the one who has designed it. He’s the one in control of it. He’s the one setting the pace.”
*Pursuing the Process, Part 1: Confident and Unashamed “The nails that pierced Him declared us free and clear. What marvelous news! It’s a sweet reminder to combat our shame and guilt. The cross is the antidote. The cross sets us free from shame.”
*Pursuing the Process, Part 2: Our Part “God’s word helps us identify the places that need attention. But God’s Word is also the cleanser that helps deal with that blemish.”
*Broken but Better “Often times, our disappointments can reflect our selfish expectations.”
*Avoiding the Transparency Trap, Part 1: Beyond the Bad and Believing the Best “Our thorns are used by God for our humility, not our complacency.”
*Avoiding the Transparency Trap, Part 2: The Categories of Transparency “Sometimes to get a breakthrough, God has to break you.”
*Transformed “Jesus invites us to change the world around us with a radical way of living and loving. Our world could use a heavy dose of this kind of Jesus-culture."


“Happiness Over Holiness” is one of my favorite chapters in this book because it looks at 1 Kings and points out that when God isn’t our center, we put ourselves in the center due to our own selfishness and idolatry. We often times want to be God and do things our way. “Set Apart” kick started the word for the season that I am currently going in through. To be set apart in Hebrew is quadosh and this important chapter enlightened me onto the good that comes from being set apart. Props to Whitney for capturing and using Scripture from Leviticus to show us the importance of sin in “Pursuing the Process, Part 2” because I’ve never looked at Leviticus this way and it convicted my heart. Whitney is also incredibly honest with a sin in her life and I loved how she openly confessed something that is so simple, but has damaging effects on her mind and marriage. Sometimes the simple sins are the ones that damage us the most. This novel is so important. It helped change me in my walk with Jesus and I hope it does the same for you if you decide to pick it up.


Whimsical Writing Scale: 5

Plotastic Scale: 5

Cover Thoughts: I love this cover. The white chalk on the face is so striking and it drives home that we are not the narrative of the story.

Thank you, Netgalley and B & H Books, for providing me with a copy of this novel in exchange for an honest review. I am also a B & H Reviewer and worked in partnership to receive a free novel in exchange for a review, but this in no way has affected my opinions of this novel.

I had the pleasure of hearing Whitney Capps speak at She Speaks in both 2017 and 2018. I like her speaking style because she has no pretense. Her same self-effacing, yet cheerful and real, voice speaks to us in Sick of Me, a great book about sanctification.

Whitney asserts that many of us have settled into the Christian life rather comfortably. Yet we are dissatisfied, tempted by worldly pleasures, and discouraged with our spiritual progress. She tells us that the only way to overcome these restless feelings is through the pursuit of holiness, otherwise known as sanctification.

I underlined many of Whitney’s teachings. She writes in such a friendly style that you truly feel like you are hearing from your favorite girlfriend. Yet she is passionate about God’s Word and doesn’t mince her words when she needs to offer correction. I respect her for striking the balance between truth and grace in this much-needed book.

If you feel stuck in your journey of spiritual growth, Sick of Me will help you get moving. It’s not enough to own the fact that you are stuck and sick of who you are. You must move forward with God’s help. Whitney will lead you onward with kindness, understanding and even humor.

I received a preview copy of Sick of Me from B&H Publishers.

This was a really great read for me as someone who is drawn to a lot of self centered or self focused materials. Not that that's always a bad thing, it is just not how we truly change and transform or become sanctified. "It's not about you" sounds harsh, but it can also be kind. It is a relief to look elsewhere for growth.

“Amidst its darkness, if a story of the kings and Israel teaches us anything, it’s when our hearts turn from God, they always turn toward self.”

Thoroughly impressed by Whitney Capps’ writing for the First 5 app, I jumped at the opportunity to enjoy an entire book! In my eagerness, I didn’t read the back cover description for Sick of Me. Had I read it, I would have realized I wasn’t the target market. However, I still thoroughly enjoyed it, it is packed with Biblical wisdom and well-written.

At the outset, Whitney states the goal of the book “isn’t just to help us understand what sanctification is, but maybe as importantly, what it is not.” Now, don’t be put off by the church-lingo, this is written in a down-to-earth, easy-to-relate-to manner but it achieves it’s objective making sanctification understandable in a real-world way.

“New growth rarely happens in old places. When God plucks us up, sets us apart, and transplants us elsewhere, it forces us out of comfort and into change.

Partly said in humour but definitely true, Whitney says “a secondary goal of the book is to rescue verses that have been ripped out of context and slapped on situations that may not be fair.” Numerous Bible verses, and stories, are given context and new depth throughout the book. Having spent many hours reading the First 5 app, much of this wasn’t new to me but it’s worth isn’t diminished because of its familiarity! Each point made is substantiated by Biblical truth.

“Scripture is the mirror that God uses to point out the blemishes in my life.”

The spiritual journey Whitney takes the reader on is one I took with God years ago as I came to terms with my CRPS. It reminded me of important principles which I had to put into action and the way God teaches you to lean only on Him. This book is particularly relevant to those who are married with children and a part of a church family. It’s a four out of five on the en-JOY-ment scale for me.

Sick of Me by Whitney Capps placed me exactly where I am in life. I've felt this and I know close friends have felt it too. This book hit me where I needed to be hit.

The focus of this book is primarily in transparency vs transformation and self-help vs sanctification. I'll admit it - I'm a self-help book junkie. I do Bible studies regularly and focus on His Word BUT I do love a good self-help book. This book opened my eyes - is self=help really the right focus for me? How is that helping me grow in Christ? How is it fixing MY struggles? It's not. I'm plenty invested in self.... (ha!). It's time to switch my focus.

I will absolutely be gifting this book to a couple friends that I know feel similarly to me; we vent about it over pancakes or afternoon coffee. But we aren't doing anything to fix it. Now we can.

This book was a breath of fresh air, as it encouraged the reader to be transparent and not put on a façade. What a unique concept in these times! The author wrote in a way that it felt like a friend giving advice.

I found the author herself to be interesting, relatable, and kind in how she wrote... and yet I didn't understand a good portion of the book. That might just be me, but several chapters went out my head. I grew up in the church and I know about the topics/words mentioned throughout, and still it was often hard to understand. I think she spent way too long (the first half of the book) setting up the actual purpose of the book.

Thanks to Netgalley and B & H books for this ARC!

This is my honest review.

In Sick of Me, I admit I felt let down. I was hoping for some insight that hasn’t been written before. The target audience is Christians, although I am not sure if this was her original intention. Whitney describes a life that only Christians in “the know” or “Christian bubble” might understand. She is seeking to live a more transformative life that changes not only how she thinks her Christian walk should be, but also feel it and go beyond a feeling of brokenness. She describes various life scenarios and scripture verses to show areas of brokenness in the Bible. I think the title is a bit misleading as I cannot see she fully describes how her journey has been transforming.

Downfalls: The writing was often hard to follow, in a more spoken type lecture and I felt like the ideas were repetitive. The book would be difficult for a non Christian to pick up and understand.

Pros: Use of scripture and also admitting how scripture is used out of context to fit our viewpoints.

I give it 2.5 stars.

I received an advanced digital copy of this book from Netgalley.com and the publisher. Thanks to both for the opportunity to read and review.

In Sick of Me, Mrs. Capps does a fine job of spelling out how you can change and where to find what she's talking about, but like most Proverbs 31 Ministries products, it is doctrinally unsound.

I found this book to be unoriginal in concept and delivery.

1 out of 5 stars. Do not recommend.

It’s like having your big sister sitting on the couch filling you in on how to grow and mature in your faith. Being real and transparent are very important but you need to go a step further and add in holy, and allow God to actually change you. We can come to Jesus just as we are, but we cannot stay that way. While virtues like vulnerability, honesty, and humility are desperately needed, we should fight for more.

I have followed Whitney Capps for several years through her Proverbs 31 devotions and teachings in the First 5 app. Her words are always Biblically based, honest, and down to earth. Her new book, Sick of Me, teaches about the process of sanctification—how believers in Jesus Christ become more like Him. Whitney takes a difficult and sometimes confusing concept and brings it down from a seminary level to a much more easily understood concept. Her examples from her own life are real, and most readers will be able to relate them to their own lives. This is not a book you can rush through; you need to read it slowly and deliberately, thinking through what you have read and how to apply it to your own life.
I highly recommend this book. I will be reading it several times. I was privileged to be on the launch team and I received an ARC for my honest review.

Whitney “sits” right across the table from you as you read, thinking your thoughts and knowing where you’ve been, sort of! We’ve all got ‘em. Blind spots. As Christian women we are great at knowing but in many areas of our lives we think that’s good enough. Whitney shows us it’s not! Through “Sick Of Me” she uses biblical principles, foundational teaching and scripture to walk us good Bible girls into our best — if we choose to take the challenge to transform. So, won’t you take that step? Her writing style keeps you coming back for more. Make no mistake you cannot help but walk away changed after reading Sick of Me! #sickofmebook Whitney Capps @marycwiley #sickofmelaunch #sickofmebook studygroup #askmeifyoudliketojoin

“I am just sick of me, and I need more Jesus,” I uttered those words to my husband about two years ago, so when I saw the title of Whitney’s book I knew she had written it just for me! Opening up the first pages and reading her struggle to find purpose away from self read like my diary. Finding hope in the midst of her teachings on sanctification and holiness brought so much clarity and understanding to my own feelings and revealed to me that I was on the right track and was wrestling well as my spirit led my soul to long for a better understanding of my life in Christ. This is a timely read for a culture steeped in self help, self care and self awareness to show us God’s plan for us through the cleansing power of His love.

This is a very eye-opening book about how much we rely on our feeling and not God's word about our life. You will not regret getting this book. Thank you B&H Publishing via NetGalley for the ARC copy of this book. This is my honest opinion.

I loved this book. I received this book from NetGalley for an honest review and it is so easy to review. I read this book in a few days and could have read it in a day if I had the time. The cover was intriguing and probably why I wanted to read it. Whitney Capps did an amazing job writing this book and identifying justification and sanctification. So often in our lives we justify the life we want and try to achieve it on our own; however, with sanctification we have a life reconciled to Jesus and He is our guide. We should have a life that is transformed to follow Christ and give up our will to follow His Will. We can't desire His Will and try to achieve on our own. We so often tell ourselves so many lies and don't fully surrender our lives 100% to Christ. This book is so well written and full of scriptures that can fill our lives and be a good starting point for us to get into the Word of God! We need to be authentic and not a facade. Thank you for a wonderful reminder! I loved this book so much, I had to preorder it so I could physically highlight and read it a few more times.

2.5 Stars!!! I overall found this to be an insightful take on contemporary Christian faith and culture. Because I’m not in ministry, or in what this author describes as the “church bubble,” I was fascinated by what I recognized to be church concept-speak. I understood the concepts but they’re not words that I use frequently and so perhaps they were more interesting to me as ideas and concepts than they might be to someone who reads a lot of books similar to this one.

I’m not familiar with this author but in the course of reading this, I found out she’s a popular speaker and reading this, you can tell because it reads and presents like a talk or a sermon in the stream of consciousness-style of the narrative, which is at times a little hard to follow as it’s very wordy, long-winded and repetitive as we all can be when we’re talking. Additionally, this is probably not a book for new Christians or people who aren’t in what the author refers to as “the church bubble.” I’d even go ahead to say this book would be perfect if you are the “ministry bubble” or the close to that (PKs, youth ministers, people with friends in seminary or people who’ve attended seminary themselves or are ministers or and Ministers spouses or people who do a lot of this kind of reading). I’m not in any of these “bubbles” so I often couldn’t relate to the scenarios and anecdotes depicted.

I feel like this was a fairly theoretically weighty book backed by biblical contexts which was good. But then when the author tried to make these contexts contemporary with anecdotes, the part that should have been the easiest, that’s when this book was at its weakest. The anecdotes did not match up with what the depth this book was calling for. They lacked vulnerability and were very surface level and not at all matching the biblical contexts- like the sort of surface stories you tell if you go on a tv show or a job interview and you’re asked about your weaknesses and you give some non-weakness answer. By the end of the book, I realized why the author was being reserved with her vulnerability and brokenness, but it also made the book feel less relatable especially with the level of vulnerability she was asking for the reader to access in Christ.

This book also places a lot of focus on how the author came the her conclusions she’s drawing, ensuring that they are bible-based. This is excellent for this sort of book. However, very little energy is spent on the practicalities of living the calls to action. And I understand that a bit because the author states that she wasn’t out to write a prescriptive book. Unfortunately, I think that’s what this kind of thesis needed. Because if not, it leads to the continuation of the self-obsessive “am I doing this right or aren’t I” that this book speaks against.

I also at times struggled to understand the subtle nuances the author was trying to distinguish between what contemporary Christian culture says and what her own thesis was. I think some of it was a little to semantics-driven and incredibly-nuanced for me to make the necessary distinctions.

Lastly, my perception reading this book is that it was written for a specific category of Christians who are similar in background to the author- and maybe that’s a major reason why I struggled to connect with this book. I do think this is a good book to read because not many books are written for long-time Christians or Christians that the world might already perceive as being “christianly” or “not struggling” because they’re in ministry or they’re ministry-adjacent or live in a small homogenously Christian community where people seem to believe the same things and appear to be mature Christians. Those are the people I would recommend this book to.

I received an advance reading copy of this book from B&H Publishing through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

If you have never listened or read anything by Whitney Capps you need to start now and this book is a great place to start. She really stepped on my toes in the first two chapters and throughout the whole book. I cannot wait for it to come out on Audible so I can listen to it. Whitney has a way of explaining scripture that really sticks with me. I highlighted and took notes on so much in this book my highlighter pen ran out! Great book, great author. You need to order it today.

This book is so well written
I am in awe of Him and how He sends us exactly what we need , exactly when we need it. The words that @whitneycapps has written are as honest, raw and Christ centered as anything I have read in a very long time. I am in a season where I am so weary of hearing my own voice and focusing on my own brokenness. I am trying to focus on more Jesus, less me. And it is hard stuff. Sanctification is renewed in me in a way that I have never felt in the past. Or at least been aware of. The pages are underlined, highlighted and dog eared. A game changer for me. I highly recommend this book

This book was received as an ARC from B&H Publishing Group (B&H Books, Holman Bibles, B&H Español, and B&H Kids) in exchange for an honest review. Opinions and thoughts expressed in this review are completely my own.

I was very looking forward to reading this book due to Self-Help being one of our most popular areas and areas in need of some new material. I loved how this book took the modern world and used the latest trends and fads to help convey the message that your own personal persona should be what only matters and not to let the judgment and views of others define who you are. Basically, I wish this book was around when I was in high school because this was the ultimate message that I have learned from when I was a senior in high school until today. I can not wait for the release of this book for our next teen book club to share my story and to have backup that defines my experience such as Sick of Me.

We will consider adding this book to our Self-Help collection at our library. That is why we give this book 5 stars.