This is not an easy book to read. Not because it is badly written, Louise O'Neill has a wonderful way with prose. It's because of the topic of the story. It's a book about self-destruction. Mistaking love for being used. While I found it hard to empathise with the main character, I often found myself uncomfortably nodding along to her feelings. For many women, there will be a recognition in Sarah's thinking.

I'll certainly be recommending it to the young adults in my library as essential reading.

Louise O’Neill is not one to shy away from difficult subjects. Just as her novel ‘Asking For It’, exploring the aftermath of rape, reminds us that everyday injustices are part of what we live with, so in ‘Almost Love’ she explores how and why family life, our education, friendships and loss make us who we are and why we can be drawn into unwise relationships.
Sarah appears to be a confident girl. She’s a well-liked Art teacher, she has a devoted partner, Oisin, and a father who likes to keep in touch. She lives in a beautiful house and enjoys a great social life. But she’s not happy. Memories of Matthew, an older man with whom she has a ‘text and sex’ relationship keep emerging, reminding her that she allowed herself to be abused, that she persuaded herself that Matthew actually cared for her, and that she thought she loved him. Sarah lives in a troubling half-light, appalled that she allowed herself to be used and desperate to see him again.
The novel moves between her present with Oisin and her past with Matthew. The different time frames are constructed subtly, rather as a shift in one’s thoughts and whilst, in summary, the plot might seem to be a run of the mill ‘loved and lost’ novel, it is far from being so.
Louise O’Neill is primarily interested in how the characters’ psychologies affect events and vice versa. She bravely creates a pretty unlikeable victim: Sarah can be cruel and selfish. She treats her friends appallingly; she is angry with her father but cannot tell him why; she is cavalier about her work. And all of this happens because she is in thrall to Matthew, waiting for his next text to summon her to their seedy hotel room.
Yet over the course of the narrative we do understand why she is as she is. The author constructs the character layer by layer so that we appreciate why she is unsupportive, why she is demanding, why she is critical. She needs to feel loved but, perversely, chooses the wrong man, perhaps because sub-consciously she believes she is undeserving. In the end, we root for her recovery, knowing that the hurt that has been done to her will take a long time to fade and remembering that she has been equally unkind to those who really love her.
My thanks to NetGalley and Quercus for a copy of this novel in exchange for a fair review.

1.5/2 stars

This story did not go where I thought was going to go - the synopsis made me think that is was going to be about an abusive relationship, but It is really about unrequited love.

I did not like this book at all - the authors writing is the only thing I think I liked about this book. It's just that, if I don't like the main character, then I won't be able to connect or stay interested in the story. And the main character, Sarah, is a bitch. She's an awful person to everybody in her life, including her dad and her boyfriend, who loves her so much, but she treats him like shit on her shoe. It frustrated me to no end that nobody really called her out on it.
And then shes off crying wolf because she wants to have an official relationship with Matthew, but the only relationship he wants is friends with benefits, so the whole book switches between Sarah being a cow to everyone and then crying and complaining that Matthew doesn't love her, and I don't have the patience to read about someone like that.

Thank you, next.

The main character in this book, Sarah, is hard to warm to. She is the bad parts so many of us have experienced at one time or another, needy, obsessive, self-centred. You won't like her. But she is honest and she is raw and she will probably remind almost everyone of how they have felt at some point in a relationship when you give so much of yourself and the other person doesn't want you back. Sarah ruins things for herself and let's the poison of her sadness and insecurity seep into all areas of her life, affecting everything it touches.

Did I love this book? I'm not sure. Will it stay with me? Most definitely. This book is what Louise O'Neill does best - dark, challenging, and thought provoking.

Characters
Sarah isn’t a likeable character, in the sense that she represents those parts of myself I don’t like. She is incredibly, heart breakingly relatable, and anyone who disagrees has never been told by a friend that they are being selfish.
It’s an incredibly raw insight that Sarah has. It’s grounded, fueled by pain and unapologetic. Even when Sarah convinces herself of things that will come to pass with her relationship with Matthew, there’s part of her that knows that she is kidding herself.
While I didn’t like Sarah I'm aware that what I don't like is part of the situation she's in, so I loved her as I would a friend. I’d be there for her and help her through her pain… If she’d let me.
Matthew on the other hand is almost a shadow character; we don’t get to know much about him. This gives this character a two-fold purpose; it represents the shallowness of his intentions with Sarah, but more importantly, Matthew is a symbol for anyone who has been treated in this way and the wonderful thing about this novel; I no longer feel alone in it.
Plot
The narrative is this wonderful non-linear exploration of Sarah's life with, and after Matthew. It gives a real sense of PTSD from the almost sociopathic relationship Sarah found herself in.
The resolution won't a satisfying end for some people, but believe me, it's so very real that it will haunt you for days after you finish the book. It's not the ending anyone would want, especially Sarah. But as a reader, we have to remember, it's not the end. It's just the conclusion of this part of Sarah's journey.
The Writing
Louise O'Neill doesn't give us the books we want, she never has. O'Neill gives us the stories we need, and she does it so well that you will almost forget that the subjects in which she writes about would feel like a chore under anyone else's penmanship.
With Almost Love, O'Neill gives us a strong voice that struggles to keep to social expectations and provides us with a look into a world some of us would never venture into without detracting from the narrative.
Its a wonderful third novel from the talented writer and while I will always wait impatiently for her next offering; I can't deny that they are always worth that painful wait.