This book was thought provoking and raw story telling. The author talks to the readers about his raw experience of being gay and a person of color. This book is a must read.

There are some memoirs that are so honest that that they can be somewhat painful to read. Saeed Jones' story is one wrought with sadness and grief, but it's also so beautifully written. It follows the period of his life from childhood to early adulthood, where he explores his sexuality and his blackness, as well as the important relationships with the women in his family. Jones does an admirable job not skirting issues, such as internalized homophobia and racism, that plagued a lot of his early experiences.

One of the best parts of this memoir is that it's told in chronological order. For me, this is the most effective structure of memoirs because you can really feel how certain events ended up impacting his future growth and development. Another strong aspect is Jones being a super talented poet. His phrasing is heart-wrenchingly honest but somehow still beautiful.

The only downside to me is that some of the sex scenes are a bit graphic (although I do understand why he chose to write them the way he did), and I wished there had been maybe one or two additional chapters at the end of the book that show more of where Jones is now in his journey.

Reminded me a lot of Roxane Gay's writing or Kiese Laymon's memoir, "Heavy."

Gorgeous, heartbreaking story of a young gay, black man in the south. You cry and ache and cringe asking with the author as he recounts his experiences and missteps in his formative years.

I ADORED this book. So much so that I pitched it to a Spanish publisher, Dos Bigotes, and had the honor of translating it for them. :)

Beyond incredible. Not even just the story-- the writing itself was absolutely beautiful. It was poetic when it needed to be and dramatic when it needed to be and there wasn't a sentence that didn't belong. One of the best novels I've ever read.

This was easily one of the best memoirs I have ever read. An absolute must read for everyone. 5 out of 5 stars.

I have a hard time saying I "enjoyed" How We Fight For Our Lives. I would more characterize it as an experience. I appreciate Saaed Jones' willingness to let readers into his life. He was honest, engaging and most of all realistic. He made himself and me as his reader, vulnerable. I got a glimpse into a life so very different from my own, but the human aspect is similar and his story resonated. Having shared this time with him, I hope he continues to write and his story unfolds further.
I received my copy through NetGalley under no obligation.

When I tell you this book pulled me in from the very beginning, please believe me! From the moment Saeed Jones opened up with his lyrical writing, beautifully describing his mother swaying and switching her hips to Prince's I Wanna Be Your Lover, I felt a cosmic force pulling me deeper into his story. His words began to parallel memories of Prince being played throughout my childhood, the reason I became a forever fan, and before I knew it Saeed Jones was having an entirely different experience with Prince than I ever could have growing up. I had to know more about his story, wondering where reading James Baldwin novels would carry his curious mind as I flipped through the first chapter. It was then that I knew I had to devour this book. And I didn't put it down until I had done just that.

How We Fight For Our Lives is beautifully written, though sometimes overwhelming and a lot to digest even. It was, however, a raw and gripping read. I fumed. I raged. I wiped hot tears from my cheeks. I forced myself to close my gaping mouth a time too many. I felt sadness for a young boy I didn't know. I felt repulsed by a grandmother that wasn't my own. I was heartbroken by a loss I didn't even experience firsthand. I felt so many emotions that I'm sure I won't soon forget this memoir. This story is all Saeed's truth and I thank Netgalley + Simon & Schuster for being able to read a copy of it in exchange for an honest review.

Must read memoir! His poetic energy weaved with his beautiful prose is just amazing. There's so much to learn from his experience but you must be respectful of the vulnerabilities he showcases here. This isn't here for any voyeuristic pleasures, this isn't here to make you think "oh I didn't know people lived like this". This is for the people like him that have lived this, that have loved like this. For us, outside of this experience we just must immerse ourselves as a captive, yet silent audience. This isn't about us, it's about him. So just listen.

Saeed Jones's memoir of growing up gay and black in the South, as well as thriving socially and creatively in college.

Does every poet have a good memoir in them? How We Fight For Our Lives goes right up on that shelf with The Liars' Club, Just Kids, etc. Jones's writing is unrelentingly intense, refreshing when it comes to topics like puberty (No other story I've encountered treats it like the steamrolling, world-altering force it is to an 11-year-old.) This is a wild ride that circles back home rather nicely. I don't know if there's an annual award for best last line in a book, but this would be in the running.

Thank you to NetGalley and Simon & Schuster for the ARC in exchange for this review.

Throughout his life, Saeed Jones has had to carve a place for himself in a community and country that rejects young, gay, black men. With a poet's turn of phrase, he explores in this memoir his coming of age, struggles within his family, exploring his sexuality, and more. His writing is beautifully raw and honest; this book will draw you in from the very beginning. What a voice!

In “How We Fight For Our Lives” by Saeed Jones we get to see the life of Saeed through his eyes – a black, gay man from the South. There are struggles and triumphs, love and anguish as he navigates through his late twenties.

I received an ARC of this book and this is my honest review.

I'd heard a lot about this book and was thrilled to get a chance to read it! Jones is very candid and has a writing style that sucked me in from the start. Definitely a worthwhile and thought-provoking read!

<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/43682552-how-we-fight-for-our-lives" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px"><img border="0" alt="How We Fight For Our Lives" src="https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1564946002l/43682552._SX98_.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/43682552-how-we-fight-for-our-lives">How We Fight For Our Lives</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/5054643.Saeed_Jones">Saeed Jones</a><br/>
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/3011625236">5 of 5 stars</a><br /><br />
What a gift this memoir. Poignant, lyrical, brutal, tender, overwhelming, honest, are just a few words to describe this memoir, but not enough to do it justice. Highly recommend everyone reading and experiencing these stories for themselves. I look forward to reading more of Saeed Jones’ writing. <br /><br />Thank you to Netgalley for the advance copy. I’m still going to buy a hardcover, it was that good.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/list/5999639-ankita">View all my reviews</a>

I didn’t know what to expect going into this, but I’m officially in love with Saeed’s writing style. It was raw, witty, and so relatable. I also experienced adolescents in the Dallas suburbs and struggled with my grandparent’s relationship with religion as well. I appreciated how honest and open he was about his sexuality without censoring his language.

Really well written and fascinating memoir, particularly enjoyed it as an audiobook as the author narrates! Highly recommend!

How We Fight For Our Lives is a marvelous memoir written in chapters that function as individual essays. Saeed Jones tells us about growing up a gay Black boy in Texas, his relationships with his mother and grandmother, and his age of exploration as a young man in college. A coming-of-age memoir, it is also the story of his love for his mother and how she shaped him.

One of the most shocking moments in the memoir is when his grandmother takes him to church. It’s clear she has talked to the pastor, expressing her concern that her young grandson is too worldly (too gay) and asking him to pray for him. The pastor calls down illness upon his mother because her Buddhist faith is blamed for his problems. Since his mother had heart problems, this seemed impossibly wrong. It is not bad enough the world is against him for being Black and being gay, his family is failing him, too.

He describes this so delicately, “People don’t just happen. We sacrifice former versions of ourselves. We sacrifice the people who dared to raise us. The “I” it seems doesn’t exist until we are able to say, “I am no longer yours.” My grandmother and I, without knowing it, were faithfully following a script that had already been written for us. A woman raises a boy into a man, loving him so intensely that her commitment finally repulses him.”

Of course, your family is family and forgiveness can be found…even when people don’t ask for it.

How We Fight For Our Lives is beautifully written. Jones has a poet’s felicity with language. His writing is beautiful. At times it is brutal as when he talks about his risk-taking sexual adventures. Other times it is delicate, as in the description of what passed with his grandmother. It is always honest and blunt.

I am not a straight white woman and Jones is a gay Black man. We are biographical antipodes, but he writes so well, it does not matter. I loved his stories. I admire his compassion and his drive to succeed. He dreamed of going to New York City, but when he could not afford the tuition for NYU, he adjusted, seeking a school that gave him a full scholarship and deferring the New York dream to his postgraduate career. This is a mature man, a wise man, and he wrote a loving memoir of his family and of fighting for his life.

I received an e-galley of How We Fight For Our Lives from the publisher through NetGalley

I devoured this book over the course of one morning. Jones's prose is powerful and moving. His account of growing up as a gay black man in contemporary America is a must-read.

Quite possibly my favorite read of the year. Having read some of the authors poetry before this, it felt getting to know the author on another level. I have been recommending this one left and right. I think everyone would benefit from reading this book.

Startling read that left me breathless and uncomfortable in my own skin. Powerful and moving memoir I won’t soon forget.