Holy crap.

This one has received some early buzz, and it is 100% valid.

The story is about Vanessa, a 15 year old boarding school student who falls into a manipulative and life changing affair with her 40-something English teacher. Eventually, he is accused of sexual abuse by a handful of other girls as well.

This book was addicting, impossible to put down, and absolutely crazy. It's definitely my number one read of the year so far, and left me with a book hangover for days. I read it nonstop one weekend and then thought about it for the rest of week. It's hard to find a book that sucks you in that completely, and this is one of them. It consumed my life while I was reading it!

We see Vanessa now, as a 32 year old who was deeply affected by the illicit affair, and then we see her as a 15 year old, falling "in love" with her teacher. It's easy to see how he manipulated her with his charm, attention, and declarations of love, to the point where I sometimes thought they truly loved each other; then you get pulled back and realize... NO! NO! He was a master manipulator, and the author just did such a fantastic job of making you see how Vanessa fell into his trap.

I can't rave enough about this one. The writing is so damn good that you are able to clearly see how he trapped her and then how negatively it impacted the rest of her life, even many years later.

This novel truly is intoxicating and I am already calling it one of my top three reads of the year. I will read anything and everything that Kate Elizabeth Russell puts out, because this is such an impressive debut. I hope to see MUCH more from her!

Highly recommended... I can't stop talking about it or thinking about it!

Thanks to netgalley and the publisher for the chance to review this book.

With Teacher/student relationships always in the news this is by no means a new topic, however the author does take a unique approach and delivers a interesting book. I enjoyed it. 4 stars

Purely magnificent, shocking, wondrous, un-put-downable, horrifying, and downright beautiful. I devoured this in two sittings and already want to reread it. Thanks so much to NetGalley and William Morrow for providing me with an ARC of this amazing novel. I will definitely be recommending it to my library patrons.

Compulsively readable, complex, and breathtaking. By the end, I felt so connected to Vanessa Wye, to her story.

Wow. It’s so difficult to read a book on rape, consent, sexual trauma, and healing and say “this is such a good book”, because it does feel wrong in some way. But Russell took this story, Vanessa’s story, and turned it into a powerful tale about trauma—but also healing.

The story told it to us in two perspectives. Vanessa as a 15 year old girl and Vanessa as an adult—both still in some sort of complicated sexual relationship with her (former) teacher. And Russell told it amazingly well. Her writing is intoxicating, and the story is gut-wrenching, and sad, and at times, makes you want to yell. But trust me, you want to read this.

Also, this story clearly should come with a number of trigger warnings for rape, sexual trauma, and pedophilia.

I couldn't put this down. It is dark and haunting and beautiful and relatable but also unimaginable and heartbreaking.

I can not stop thinking about this book. Beautifully written and well crafted. I love the jumping between 2000 and current day. A very interesting twist on the #METOO era. It was really fascinating and terrifying to read how the teacher groomed the main character.

When Vanessa is 15 years old she has a sexual affair with her 42 year old English teacher Mr. Strane. Years later Strane is accused of sexual misconduct by another student. Vanessa (who continues to be in contact with the teacher) is torn deciding if she should come forward with her experience or remain silent and protect the man she thought she loved.
This novel is both compelling and creepy. The reader is taken through Vanessa's young life as we see how Strane grooms the young innocent girl. The author was so adept writing the behavior and conversations between the teacher and girl it made my skin crawl. You can tell what the teacher is trying to do while the innocent girl can not. (shivers)...
Later, as an adult when the accusations by the other student are made you can see how Vanessa struggles with her decision as to what to do. She has been so damaged by the ordeal as a young 15 year old, and her conversations as an adult with Strane have her being pulled in both directions. What decision will she make?
The author Kate Elizabeth Russell has a blockbuster first novel on her hands! Her writing and character development are strong and the story line keeps you guessing.
With these stories popping up so often in the news, and the Me Too movement make this a very current novel.
This would be a great choice for book clubs ... and a great movie ... just sayin'...
Thank you NetGalley and the publisher for choosing me to read and review this book.