I loved Fair Play. I think it's a great resource for couples living together or about to. There were so many times throughout the book that I realized I was living in a way that I thought was "right" for a married woman. So many of the things I do for my family are things I just do without any expectation of help or gratitude because they need to be done. I wish this book had been around when I was 19 an had moved in with my future husband, Fair Play is thought-provoking and in many ways freeing. It's helped me value myself and my time more and has changed the way I parent my son.

Reviewed for Shelf Awareness. Full review to be found via Shelf Awareness: https://www.shelf-awareness.com/readers/2019-10-15/fair_play:_a_game-changing_solution_for_when_you_have_too_much_to_do_(and_more_life_to_live).html

A great addition to a number of books and articles I've been reading about the gender division of household labor. It did repeat information I've seen elsewhere, but that would be helpful for readers who are starting with this book. I didn't get around to implementing the exact instructions, which would be the most helpful part of the book.

This book should be given as a shower gift to every new mommy or bride. She covers so many good points that we as humans think we need to conquer the world! As I worked my way thru this publication I could see my faults in every chapter. Why haven't I read this book early in my life. It will now find its way into so many others hands. Thanks NetGalley for the ARC.

I would have been happy with less anecdotes and a condensed, practical book, but it's easy enough to skim through parts of this and find the useful parts. Every relationship/partnership has different dynamics, but I could see myself recommending this to couples who could use a toolkit for dividing household labor up. It has a pretty extensive list to get you started on all the time and energy consuming activities it takes to keep a family running. It looks like they are publishing this as a card set and I'm wondering if that might be the better method to deliver this information (but as a librarian, the book format makes the most sense for our patrons.)
Thanks so much for the ARC! (As a personal note, my spouse and I are tackling this for 2021!)

I wrote about this book for Ms. Magazine
https://msmagazine.com/2019/10/16/eve-rodsky-wants-feminist-partners-to-play-fair/

REVIEW BEGINS:
“When I grow up, I will have a true partner in life.” After watching her mother raise her alone, that was the phrase Eve Rodsky repeated to herself often growing up. She was “determined to build and sustain a 50/50 partnership.”

Imagine Rodsky’s surprise, then, when she became the “she-fault parent” in her relationship—doing the “invisible work [often] unseen and unrecognized by our partners… despite the fact that it costs us real time and significant mental and physical effort with no sick time or benefits.” While working full-time, she was still “masterminding our family’s day-to-day life,” and her husband “was still not much more than a ‘helper’ rather than a collaborative partner-planner-participant in all that took place for our family.”

Rodsky became determined to fix the problem, and created “a home management system with clearly delineated roles, explicitly defined expectations, along with a measurement of accountability.”

It started with her “Sh*t I Do List,” of all the tasks she and other moms were in charge of, which led to the Fair Play card system—the basis of her new book, Fair Play: A Game-Changing Solution for When You Have Too Much to Do (and More Life to Live).

A key to this system is that one person will conceptualize, plan and execute (CPE) the Cards of Contention—and that it will not bounce back to all being on one person’s shoulders.

I was impressed by the amount of research clearly went into the creation of this book in its final form! Many articles, books, and blogs have been written recently about invisible labor, emotional labor, mental load, etc., but most of it doesn't go beyond identifying the issue to trying to discover and workable solution to the problem. Whenever the issue of emotional labor has come up in my own life, or with close friends and family, its usually just makes people defensive and start keeping "score" of everything, which usually only makes things worse. Rodsky acknowledges this tendency, and immediately goes beyond it by staking out her own field-tested Fair Play system. Highly recommended!

I have to admit, I did not read all of this book because it seemed too much like real life - and it was too depressing to read. all about how life IS, not what it COULD be. I need hope and encouragement, not just a reflection of how screwed up things are...

Anyone who has been in a relationship where they are sharing their lives under one roof will find something of interest in Fair Play. I can't speak for everyone, but for most of my friends and my relationship, the scale never seems balanced when it comes to taking care of the place called home(and the children or fur babies). Fair Play presents a plan for a more even distribution of the myriad of tasks that have to be dealt with on an ongoing basis. It is written in a thought-provoking and engaging way, that may lead to some well-needed adult conversations.
Too often, arguments ensue when people are frustrated, and I can see how taking the emotion out of the conversation, and approaching it logically, as you would at work, can lead to a better outcome. That may be the hardest part of trying to improve the situation at home, but after all, we would all agree that running a home and having a family is a second job, so why not treat it the way you treat your paying job? It is well- researched, well thought out, and may well save a relationship or two. This book gave me quite a lot to think about and I am eager to see where it takes me. US publication – October 1, 2019
I received a DRC from Putnam through NetGalley.

My Review System:
5 stars – Absolutely loved everything about the book! It was unique or presented something differently, and I couldn't put it down. Highly recommended.
4 stars – A really solid read that made me glad I read the book. Didn't keep me up all night or make me abandon my plans, but I would recommend it without hesitation.
3 stars – An ok read and I might try another book by the same author to see if their writing style is a good fit for me.
2 stars – The book just didn't work for me.
1 star – I have never read a 1-star book( yet, fingers crossed), but I would have to hate it to give it this rating.

I am so happy to have won an egalley of FAIR PLAY through Shelf Awareness. Thank you for the opportunity. I look forward to reading it!