I gave this book 5 stars because the voice of the main character Bea is so compelling. And as a bonus she has a therapist whose counsel is something I wish so many of my students could hear. Examining her feelings about her gay dad getting remarried, the possibility of a step sister, the difficulty of social friendships, and the possibility that she hurt her cousin, Bea takes the reader on an emotional journey!

You know, I don't read all that many middle grade novels. I read mostly picture books, poetry, and nonfiction. Then I read a book like this, and I think, Why? If I could somehow guarantee that every reading experience (with mg novels) would be as lovely as this one, I would read a lot more of these.

I've liked all of Stead's novels, and this one hit the mark, too. Maybe especially because I'm reading it at a time when the whole world's routines and actions feel changed due to the coronavirus. That probably gives this title some extra resonance. But I feel pretty sure I would love this book no matter when I read it.

I love all these characters--these real, complex, messed-up humans doing their best to be good people. Even when they feel they aren't or can't be.

I really love the depiction of two loving parents in a painful divorce. Their focus always remains on being there for Bea. I love the positive representation of a now-single mom and a gay couple.

I especially love Bea. I feel like I am Bea in some ways. That my kids are Beas. That I see at least a few Beas on every author visit I do. I kind of wish I could fill my own life with the kinds of relationships Bea has. This might sound sappy, but this book makes me want to try to do that. To be more forgiving of myself and of others when we fall short.

A few of my favorite quotes: "I yelled, 'Angus!' and he looked up and waved. I had nothing to tell him. I just wanted him to see me right then."

"The worst thing about getting a bat shot was all the time I spent thinking about it before I actually got it."

"life is like a trip. A very long one. And what matters most is the people you travel with."

"If what you want is butter, you have to keep going, even you only half believe you'll get there."

Highly recommended!

Review copy provided the publisher via Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

Bea's parents are getting a divorce, but they still love each other. They've made a list of things that will not change about her life, regardless of what changes are being made. Her father is marrying a man he's been dating for two years and Bea couldn't be happier for Jesse to be joining their family. Even better? He has a daughter that will be her step sister! Bea wants to become the best sister possible. She also battles anxiety. This realistic fiction book is great because it normalizes therapy for children, and teaches them coping skills for anxiety, among other things.

Disclaimer: I received an eARC in exchange for an honest review. Thanks to Netgalley.

I’ve been a fan of Rebecca Stead since I myself was in middle school and became obsessed with the expertly-crafted, Newbery-winning When You Reach Me. This book is a little younger than that one and Goodbye Stranger, following ten-year-old Bea who tells us the story of her fifth grade year (and some of her third grade year, because it’s important to her current situation as it was when her parents divorced), the year her dad is getting married to his boyfriend, who also has a daughter exactly her age, and she’s ALWAYS wanted a sister!

I love the way Stead crafts her stories. The chapters are short and immerse you in Bea’s mind, as it is truly her telling you the story. She has so much love and heart for her family, but she worries a lot and is holding inside a secret that’s causing her so much guilt. I loved Bea and her big heart, her family, and her Star Trek: The Next Generation watches with her soon-to-be aunt, and I think readers of all ages will fall in love with her, too.

I love Rebecca Stead's mind and her books. This one was a perfect shallow dive into a wonderfully imperfect character, Bea, and her increasingly complicated life after her parents' divorce and her father's new relationship with his boyfriend.

Bea has always been a worrier, and as her father's happiness blooms, she worries that her mother is secretly sad but is too brave to let on; that she's being left out of things; that having two homes will mean she's always missing the other one; and that her own periodic lack of impulse control and her rage may have contributed to others' pain.

Her friends-like-family NYC network of loved ones, including her therapist Miriam, are endearing and wonderful. Suitable for younger readers but special enough for a grown-up's quick read as well.

Thanks to NetGalley and Wendy Lamb Books for providing an uncorrected proof for review.

Rebecca Stead is my go-to for solid middle-grade fiction. I love that her books always have a twist or an element of magic in them.

In "The LIst of Things That Will Not Change", Bea is a young girl dealing with her parents' divorce, her father's remarriage to another man, and is shuffled back and forth between her mom and her dad's apartments each week. She spends much of the book relating details to her therapist and reflecting back on choices she made as a 10 year old.

I enjoyed the plot of the book a lot. As a former elementary school teacher, I think there would be a lot of value in this story for kids; to let them know they don't have to feel alone if their lives feel out of control. I could see a lot of the students I've worked with over the years in Bea's precocious nature.

All that being said, this book contains a lot of BIG feelings. That's not a bad thing! Kids have these big feelings! And part of what I love about Stead's books is that she tells the story truly from the child's POV, so it's wholly age-appropriate.. I would probably read it with my own child, so we could discuss it along the way.

In The List of Things That Will Not Change, Bea is at an age where she understands a lot, but not everything. Some things will not change. Lots of others will. It’s a lot to deal with at any age, and Bea does it admirably … most of the time.

The biggest strength of this book is its characters. Each one, even the minor ones, are well developed. From Bea’s parents and babysitter to her friends and new sister they all add dimension and heart. It’s Bea’s therapist, Miriam, however, who stole the show. A nonjudgmental adult who helps Bea organize her thoughts and work through her worries is someone we could all benefit from.

Bea is a joyful and optimistic protagonist that you can’t help but root for. While The List of Things That Will Not Change could have been dark, it is instead full of light and hope. It should appeal to a large cross-section of middle-readers.

Another middle grade masterpiece from Rebecca Stead. I mean this in the best possible way: she does so much with so little. Her writing evokes so many feelings, and it never feels forced or overwrought. The small details she includes just make everything shine a little brighter, and Bea and her family and friends are charming and real. Officially - in a no pressure sort of way, because this is really a mean thing to do to an author - waiting for Rebecca’s next book before this one has even hit its pub date. ❤️

Rebecca Stead has done it again! I absolutely loved this book. As I was telling my students about it the other day, there was one student that said, "Oh my goodness, this sounds almost just like my life." The List of Things That Will Not Change is a delightful story about a fifth-grade girl whose parents divorce, and through her gay father's upcoming marriage she will gain a sister. Bea has really high hopes and expectations for having a sister since she has been an only child up until this point. The realities of a child going through counseling, learning from mistakes with friends and family, and still being hopeful and optimistic through all of her challenges, make Bea's story one that many will relate to and fall in love with.

Pitch-perfect, insightful first-person narration. Stead excels at writing in the voice of a young narrator. Reading this reminded me so much of listening to my child tell me a story about her day. The story she shares with me may seem straightforward, but hidden inside are all the things she's learning about the world—how she's piecing together her sense of self and her relationships and how absolutely everything works. This is Stead's gift—to write in this deceptively simple way while revealing lovely, gentle, very real truths.

I really enjoyed this title. Some children who have lived through divorce will be able to find themselves in this story. Bea navigates her new normal with the help of a therapist. I enjoy the inclusion of therapy and having someone to talk to who is unbiased about the situation. Bea is able to come to terms with her dark secret and learns to embrace and understand the hurts of those around her. I also enjoy the portrayal of supportive parents in all iterations provided in this family. The family is not the nuclear family that some desperately think we need to cling to as "normal" or "traditional", but it is a family full of love and respect for all members.

4.5 stars. This was delightful!

I loved so much about this - the list Bea's parents gave her to help anchor her through a season of major transition, Bea's relationship with her dad's boyfriend, and the scenes with Bea and her therapist. There are so many great pieces of this related to the therapy relationship - how Bea deals with her worries, the descriptions of feelings/emotions, the scene where Bea is talking about getting a sister. I also appreciated the honesty of this, both Bea's honesty as she tells the story and also the honesty in the book that some families struggle to accept "non-traditional" romantic relationships. The latter was painful to read, but so, so honest. I appreciated how the author didn't pull her punches with this part of the story.

This book is absolutely lovely - don't miss it! (LGBTQ+)

I've been a huge Rebecca Stead fan since First Light, and while I'm always super excited for a new book by her, I'm also always a tiny bit nervous that it won't live up to my expectations. BUT, that hasn't happened yet, and The List of Things That Will Not Change doesn't disappoint.
Bea's life changes when her parents get divorced, but she also knows some things will never change. Bea deals with big things like her father getting remarried, and getting a new sister, but she always deals with things like a not-always nice classmate, feeling left out and guilt. (Although, sometimes those are not necessarily always "smaller" issues.) As always, Stead gets this middle-grade character's voice just right in the thoroughly enjoyable novel about things changing, while also staying the same.

The List of Things That Will Not Change is a story about a girl who really comes into her own and learns who she is while telling us, the readers, her story.
Bea is the young girl, and her story is told a little bit out of order, but it makes sense because she's the narrator, and she's telling us about her life. She begins by explaining about the sound of corn and what that has to do with her dad getting married to his boyfriend. Bea then talks about her parents getting divorced, her dad planning his wedding to Jesse (the boyfriend), and how her life won't actually change too much. In fact, she keeps a list of things that will not change, even with the divorce and wedding.
Bea also talks about her extended family (aunt, uncle, cousins), and her soon-to-be new sister, and her therapist Miriam, and that gives us, the readers, more insight into Bea. She's dealing with guilt, anxiety, excitement, jealousy, rejection, and many other emotions. They're all tangled up together, and Bea has to learn how to handle each and every one of them, both on her own and with the help of Miriam.
I found Bea to be very real. She's a character younger readers can relate to. She's likable.
I actually found most of the characters to be very well-written and realistic. Bea and her family and friends feel like people you may know or have met before. They could be your neighbors, family friends, or even your own family. Even Jesse's brother, who has a really awful moment near the end of the book (he's homophobic), is someone readers will recognize as authentic. And his scene is a good teaching moment for parents of younger readers to explain why he reacts the way he does, why there are people like him in the world today, and how to perhaps talk to or deal with someone like that should they come into contact with said person.
Overall, this book is one that will resonate with kids (and even parents/adult readers), and I know they'll enjoy Bea's telling of her "life" story within the pages.
4.5 stars from me!

In The List of Things That Will Not Change by Rebecca Stead, readers will find a multitude of traits within the characters. There are so many issues presented in this book that many readers will be able to relate to their experiences. There is the main character, Bea, who has to navigate living between two households due to the divorce of her parents. In addition, her father is getting ready to marry his future husband. Underlying issues that are also presented in this book are family tensions that present as sibling conflicts among the adults, friendships that evolve (the author does an outstanding job describing conflicts among the children when they were young but the evolving friendships that remain as they are now a little older) among the children, anger management issues, seeking help from a counselor and describing the feelings before/during/after a session, and even talking through strategies used to calm oneself down when escalated. There are so many perspectives the reader might lean towards which is why this is such a great read! Adding this to my list of gift books!

I was provided an advance copy of this title by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

This book didn’t need a long introduction to characters or the story. I became interested almost immediately. And for unusual reasons:

The first chapter is named The Sound of Corn. And the content piqued my interest.
Then the way the next topic was approached – Divorce

I’m sorry to say, that the topic of divorce alone didn’t do it for me because it’s so commonplace. But the way Bea’s parents announced their divorce felt quite unique. And Bea, the main character, was so believable that I could easily imagine her as she drew me into her story.

Dad said, “Things are changing, Bea. But there’s still a lot you can count on. Okay? Things that won’t ever change.

This was when they gave me the green spiral notebook and the green pen. (My favorite color is green.) In the notebook, they had made a list. The list was called Things That Will Not Change.

The first things on the list let her know that her parents' love for her would never change.

After learning that she would be having two houses, and moving back and forth between her parents, one of Bea’s first questions was to ask where her dog would be staying. She was told that Red would be staying at her mom’s house.

Bea picked up the green pen and added to the list.

And that’s how this special little book and story started. And for me, it didn’t stop there. I was pulled into the story both by issues and characters. And any time your mom and dad divorce because your dad is gay, can always open up some delicate issues.

But Stead doesn’t address these delicate issues in a didactic way, but rather through the eyes of a young middle school girl. Bea is real. She has issues. And she is full of innocent love. These things are carefully brought out when Bea visits her counselor throughout the book.

Occasionally it is only a one-sentence gem that the counselor utters to get Bea to thinking. But take note. They are completely eye-opening and relevant. They are not accompanied by long explanations. Just thoughts.

This is a book for middle-age readers, but it is one that adults and counselors will want to read also. It shows how important adult-attitudes can be for the well-being of children going through a divorce.

And so many smaller issues, and maybe not-so-small, are also addressed. Even the fact that Bea will have a stepsister. That doesn’t usually come without some concerns.

What Concerned Me
I really had no problem with this book.

What I Liked Best
This story offered helpful thoughts, felt realistic, and wasn’t all one-sided.

My thanks to NetGalley and Wendy Lamb for the ability to read this ARC and to give my review and thoughts regarding the book.

This might be my favorite Rebecca Stead book to date. I was a little unsure of the structure at the beginning, but Bea's telling of her parents' divorce, her dad remarrying, and getting a sister was beautifully done. I think Bea deserves a spot amongst some of the best middle grade protagonists that will be remembered for a long time .

This hit me RIGHT in the feels, in the best way. Bea reminded me so much of my childhood self and I wish that I could go back and time and hand this book to baby Chelsea to read to know that she's not alone. My heart is so full. I loved this so!!!!! much!!!!!

11 year old Sonia is getting settled with her parents divorce and learns that her dad is getting remarried. To a man . This book takes a very positive look at divorce and remarriage . When we think of divorce as a terrible thing, this book puts a positive spin on that situation showing how her parents get along and still love each other in different ways . Sonia’s dad’s remarriage to a man does not complicate things like most would think and this is the main topic in the book . This story if so well written, but it may not be the right book for everyone , but I feel it is very relevant today and am excited to put it in my elementary school library .

This was a good book, the story was great and hit on a lot of topics that kids might need help dealing with, but I felt it was a little convoluted as to what the story was really about.