thank you for the opportunity to review Why We Can't Sleep by Ada Calhoun. This book communicates many of the thoughts I've been discussing with friends and colleagues, and adds yet more to the mix. Calhoun also articulates the reality of this kind of hidden (but burdened) demographic. Well done!

I will leave 5 star review on Amazon under name of Connie

While I'm a Baby Boomer, a lot of the points in the book about GenX applied to me. There are physical issues that effect our sleep that common place for GenX, as well as stresses on them being caught in the middle with children & aging parents both needing their attention & care.

What I have in common with the GenX is how screen time & social media add to our stress & the impact it has on our sleep.

As a working mother, this book was an eye-opening look at the modern struggles of modern day women. Faced with higher expectations than ever, lack of sleep is the least of our worries. This very readable book shines a light on this issue and gives thought-provoking arguments for how we can make a change!

“You come to this place, midlife. You don’t know how you get here, but suddenly you’re staring 50 in the face!” Yes this was me 6 years ago when i turned the big 5-0 and I knew this book was written about me. Especially with the title as I have not slept good in YEARS!! But this book is more about the facts of being in the Generation X group of women which according to this book, I miss it by a year since I was born in 1963. I found myself skimming large sections because I was losing interest. Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for this book and this is my honest opinion.

I received an ARC of Why We Can't Sleep by Ada Calhoun in exchange for a fair review.
Why We Can't Sleep should be ready by anyone who considers themselves part of Generation X, knows someone who is part of Generation X, or is interested in psychology or sociology. The interviews with a variety of women and their common themes are reassuring, but the objective analysis of how we got to this point is outstanding. I look forward to re-reading this book, I think I will get more out of it each time I review it.

A book that focuses on Gen X women (many of whom are currently in their forties and fifties) and the reasons many are feeling anxious or dissatisfied with how their lives have turned out. It discusses their childhood experiences including being minimally supervised and the sky high divorce rate. Many Gen Xers are overly cautious and feel that everything is up to them (they can't rely on others for support. They focused on careers, putting off marriage and kids until they felt secure but then many not being able to find partners or conceive children. On top of that, they graduated college when jobs were shrinking and disappearing making it harder to accumulate wealth, a lot of which was lost in the recessions and housing bust. Now they are dealing with menopause and perimenopause which is not widely discussed and are in the dark about how that affects them. Very interesting and informative.

I picked up this book because I thought it was going to help me sleep through the night. That really wasn’t what this book was about. The facts were interesting as a Generation X and how midlife is affecting us and why. At times, I felt that there was just so much negative. But I do agree, many of us are not where we are in life we thought we would be at this time.

This book was an interesting insight to why women of Generation X (those entering middle age now) are struggling with the challenges of middle age. From menopause to thinking we should have had it all by now, Calhoun explores some commonly held beliefs and the stress they cause. She goes into depth about why this Generation is dealing with different and unique stresses than the ones that came before. She also offers ideas of reframing the stress and other ways to minimize the impact on your life as everything goes haywire in middle age. This book was an informative book and I really felt its message.

4 stars

I received a complimentary e-book copy of this book from Grove Press through NetGalley. Opinions expressed in this review are completely my own. Thank you to Ada Calhoun, Grove Press, and NetGalley for the opportunity to read this book.

This is a really hard book to review. It was very funny, very sobering, very educational, very empowering, and very scholastic at times. To me, this book was the VERY best when it was funny AND educational!! The author is REALLY FUNNY at times. However, I felt that it was a little heavy with the educational and scholastic at times with a paragraph filled with multiple quotations and/or citations. It was a little tedious at times.

But, the information was very good about a multitude of issues that are affecting Late Baby Boomers, Generation X, and Early Millenials. I was born in the Baby Boomer generation, but connect with Generation X so much more. So there is good stuff for all three generations. The most interesting to me was the complete lack of discussion and available literature for and among women about perimenopause and menopause. This is an important area of women's health where we must and can do better!!

This is a great book for women 3o years of age+!!! Definite recommend

I thought the premise of this book was fascinating, particularly because I am the subject of Calhoun's research - a female Gen Xer. Her exploration of my generation and how our experiences growing up contributed to the midlife crises we find ourselves in today is thorough and illuminating. However, while her intention was to provide a reassurance for the reader, I found her message a bit dreary. I'm not sure a woman in the throes of a midlife crisis, - be it financial, emotional, social, or any other - would finish this book and feel good about her future. I didn't find that I related to many of the women Calhoun interviewed, which made it difficult for me to sustain interest at times. It's a worthwhile read, nonetheless, and I appreciate the deep dive into my cohort's experiences.

Ada Calhoun's book was written for the Generation X, a generation I am just a couple years too young to identify with, but as being on the cusp I see some similarities. I, too, feel overworked, underappreciated, exhausted, and not listened to. So, despite being billed as a book for Gen-X, older Millennials will likely find this book helpful and relate-able, as well.

"Life-work balance" could very well be the catch-phrase of the modern working-woman. It's something that we keep hearing that we need to make more room for, but, at the same time, we're getting messages that if we strive for "life-work balance" where a man is not, then we are somehow responsible for the current wage gap. Calhoun talks about both this and other issues facing the contemporary middle-aged woman and how it's affecting our happiness. She also ventures a few solutions for how to get yourself out of the rut. All-in-all, it's an interesting sociological and political exploration, and definitely thought-provoking. I would recommend it to any one finding themselves in the same predicament.

Thank you to Ada Calhoun, Grove Atlantic, and NetGalley for allowing me early access to the e-book for this review. As always, all opinions are my own.

I was provided an advance copy by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

This is a book-length expansion of the article that rocked my and my friends' world, about the midlife crisis of Gen X women. It goes into much greater depth about all the things we are up against, at work and in our families and in our bodies and in our culture, to explain the specific struggle we women in our 40s and 50s currently face. The first few chapters cover well-trod ground--work-life balance, child care, parental leave--with a lot of research to back it up but not a lot of new insight. However, the latter chapters delve into topics I hadn't thought about a lot, and at the end there are some pretty profound insights about how we conceptualize our lives. Calhoun has always been a thoughtful and incisive writer, and this book was sorely needed as a voice for the challenges women my age are facing. #whywecantsleep #netgalley

As a Gen X woman so many of the concerns addressed by the book resonated with me. It almost had the feel of talking to your girlfriends with some research behind the concerns.

There were many concerns that I thought thank goodness this isn't my problem, yet. Other concerns were comforting to see that I wasn't alone To a degree the book started to stress me out because chapter after chapter it was problem after problem but no solutions. The last chapter gave me hope.

If as a GenX woman you are feeling a little overwhelmed and wonder why I would suggest this book to help understand and know that you aren't alone.

Have you seen that meme? The one about your brain at 3 am waking you to review every dumb and cringe-worthy thing you have done lately? Then this is the book for you, especially if you are part of Generation X.

In her fascinating end notes, the author tells us that there is a range of years that can be called Generation X. One range is 1965-1984, from the movie Dr. Zhivago to the movie Ghostbusters. Another range is 1965-1980. Whichever range you pick, if you are a Gen X-er, this is the book for you. You may be single, married or considering divorce; you may want or not want children and you may be caught up in the busy childhood years; do you have parents who need help, too? And what about your health- do you exercise, diet, meditate? Are you in peri-menopause or menopause? No wonder you can’t sleep at night. I advise you to read this book with your friends and discuss it. You will find that author Ada Calhoun is like a friend, as she giveus friendly, comforting, and well-considered facts and advice. She also includes a lengthy and fabulous “Midlife Crisis Mixtape.”

The book consists of research and the author’s interviews with Gen X women, all blended in an interesting and relatable way. The writing is positive and encouraging, even while describing some grim scenes. There is no shrieking or gnashing of teeth, more like bemused reflections. In addition to chapters that consider the challenges of Gen X, the author also presents some solutions. I especially liked her advice to join a club or start a club. I highlighted so many passages in this book.

I loved, loved loved this book and I am in the Baby Boomer Generation- but I remember my middle decades all too well (and so does my brain at 3 am.) I agree with the book- as an older person I AM now happier and yes, Gen X friend, someday you will be me. In the meantime, read this book!

Many thanks to Net Galley and Grove Press for a digital review co-y. This is my honest review.

The book will be great for the Generation X to reflect on their lives and how everything around them has effect them. The author also talks about the important events that she feels effects their health and lives, and at the end she briefly talks about what the Generation X can do to make them feel better.
Unfortunately, I found the book more a complaint about how other generations had it great while Generation X had no choice but to follow all the information given to them without a thought and that it wasn't their fault that they follow it and that is why they are so anxious, which I find just an excuse for not taking responsibility for their choices.

I had hoped that Why We Can't Sleep by Ada Calhoun would give me useful aids to help me sleep at night, since I am right in the age group that she targets. Unfortunately, although there is a great deal of information on why we don't sleep, I didn't find anything new or particularly informative that would help me sleep. I felt that this book was more of a rehash of the reasons women don't sleep, which, if you are a woman, you have a pretty good idea of.

Thanks to the author, Grove Atlantic and NetGalley for and ARC of this book.

Unlike many 'self help' books which suggest they hold the answers to life's mysteries, Why We Can't Sleep helps the reader find real answers, helping them to see and understand the time and society we've lived in. As a gay male born on the cusp of the boomer/GenX divide, I found so much truth and realizations while reading Ada Calhoun's beautifully researched book. This book is by no means a downer. Calhoun has woven the stories from many women she interviewed, with her own life experiences, and combining them in actual, historical context-- unveils many truths about where we are now and how we got here. Even though this book focuses on, and is geared towards women of a certain age-- there are plenty of truths for us all to learn from. Fascinating reading.

I received a copy from the publisher through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

I received a copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for potentially providing a review. That said, this book was written for me. The author, Ada Calhoun, is clear from the start that her target audience is middle class women from Generation X. She gives a well-reasoned explanation for why she doesn't include other groups in this book. That doesn't mean other people can't read it. In fact, if you are trying to understand a middle class Gen-X woman, read this book.

I related on a very deep level to the stories of the women Ada interviewed. Spoiler alert: they are not all happy. However, there is comfort in knowing you are not the only person facing a particular dilemma. And in this case, knowing that the existential crisis that often overwhelms your thoughts might be affecting many women in your generation. Lucky us! The author also does a good job of showing how mid-life is different for Gen Xers than it was for Boomers and will be for Millennials.

So if you are on the verge of melting down over life stress, pop a couple of Tylenol for the existential dread and read this book. It won't solve your problems, but it might give you some insight into why life sucks right now.

Sleepy?
Can’t sleep?
Wonder about others sleeping habits?

The author primarily focuses on Generation X women....
but....if you find yourself awake in the middle of the night ....you won’t feel alone after reading ‘this’ book!

Ha... I read this during the middle of the night.

Ada Calhoun did her research!!!
She interviewed thousands of women around the country.
We get insights about what concerns Generation X women......
single women - divorce women - women with or without children - women working three jobs - women who had gotten a good education- and women who stayed in shape.
These women woke in the middle of the night wondering about alternate life choices they might have made in their lives - or had fears about aging - money - etc...
They have been hit hard financially and dismissed culturally. They have lots of debt. They’re squeezed on both sides by children and aging parents. The grim state of adulthood is hitting them hard. Many are exhausted and bewildered.

Generation X women were the first women raised from birth hearing the cliché
‘having it all’— they thought they could have careers and a rich home life. They were an experiment in crafting a higher achieving, more fulfilling, and more well rounded version of the American women. By midlife, many found that the experiment was largely failing.

The boomer generation said they were the first to hear “they could have it all”.... but it wasn’t until Gen X arrived that it was a main stream expectation.

Millennials claim they’re supposed to ‘have it all’ , too.
They have crushing student loan debts.
They are experiencing social and economic inequality, poisonous political polarization, and a rapidly changing world.

“More opportunity has not necessarily lead to greater happiness or satisfaction”.

One in four middle-aged American women is on antidepressants. Nearly 60% of those born between 1965 and 1979 described themselves as stressed.

I felt sad for many Gen X women. Yet, I felt I understood their struggles and concerns. I lived through many of the same issues when younger, too.

Many Generation X women had confusing feelings that they were embarrassed to talk about.
Generation X women reported being unhappy, depressed or exhausted.
They felt they needed to apologize for ‘whining’.
Intellectually they understood that they were ‘lucky’.
The women were fighting with how they really felt - vs. what they felt they should feel. It’s a hard place to be stuck in.

On an up note .... the cycles of life shine through. Many of the concerns for women in their 20’s, 30’s, 40’s, even 50’s....magically begin to clear up. Things get better. Inner peace is around the corner. Older - post menopausal women may have more wrinkles- but a calmness experience hits them in ways they were not able to experience as easily when they were young - ambitious- driven- with grand desires.

I related with the authors findings about women in their 60s, 70s, 80s, or 90s.
“Middle-aged women have perspective enough to see what’s important and what isn’t”. Agree!

Just the other day an interesting article came out about how reading at night helped people fall to sleep.
I posted the article on Facebook ( fitting with reading this book)....
I got funny responses from my middle aged female friends - saying ...things like “not me”.....
they kept ‘on’ reading ‘through’ the night...
nothing depressing about it.

Kudos to Ada Calhoun for her extensive research exploring this topic.
I found it heartwarming to connect with women
around the world who shared authentically.

Thank you Grove Atlantic, Netgalley, and Ada Calhoun

This was a very informative read. I myself have trouble sleeping and there was some insight in the book as to why that could be. Well done