ARC provided by NetGalley but all opinions are my own.

"Brie never felt ready, no matter how many times she had to say the words. She hoped that Kennedy would figure out how to do it on her own time. She hoped that when she did it, it would be because she was ready. Not because she felt pressured to."

so i am... crying. jsdfsh no one is surprised. i knew i would love this book because i love Nicole's writing and i adore her other book, Hurricane Season, which is one of my favorite books of all time, and middle grade sapphic novels in general have a special place in my heart. i think this is because i wish i had known i was sapphic myself earlier on, and had gotten to enjoy some stories, experiences and feelings earlier. but anyways.

so this book follows brie, a passionate thirteen year old who loves soap operas and dreams of one day being an actress. she has a crush on a girl in her class, kennedy, and also struggles through an awkward and complicated relationship with her mother.

to be honest, when i read that this story would be set in a catholic church, i was scared, for reasons i'm pretty sure you all know and understand. BUT i had no reason to be, afterall. this is one of the things i appreciate the most in this book, because despite it being a catholic school, the support that the teachers offer brie is astounding. and heartwarming. and relieving. and so wholesome. and so is the support shown by her friends and her family, even though it takes her mother longer to come to terms with brie's sexuality.

speaking of, brie's mother is... flawed, even though she says she tries her best. her relationship with her daughter is quite strained and awkward. her invading brie's privacy was one thing i could not forgive, no matter how much i tried. she is not bad, she never stops caring for and supporting her daughter, and eventually comes around, but she could have dealt better with the whole situation.

it's really hard for me to write this review because so, so many things hit very close to home. so here are other aspects that i loved, that i will just mention briefly:

- the teachers encouraging brie and the other students to question their faith, never scolding them for doubting and always trying to guide them
- brie's mom making sure that brie knows consent is important
- brie never pressuring kennedy about coming out
- everyone apologizing for their mistakes and owning up to them

PLEASE read this book, it's such an important story and so heartwarming. my review does not do it justice, but maybe after i detach myself a little from it, i'll manage to be more coherent. anyways, thank you Nicole for another beautiful story. really looking forward to the next one!

This book was an emotional punch straight to the heart, in all the best (gay) ways. It’s also very clearly an ownvoices story and that truth shines through every page and settles this specific kind of calm over the reader.

The story itself is pretty simple (a teen start figuring out her sexuality & the world doesn’t make it easy for her), but it’s not the dry outline that makes a book, is it? It’s the emotions all the events bring, it’s the character’s journey, her path to growing up & fighting for herself.

Because, you see, Brie has to struggle with a lot. She goes to a Catholic school where a boy got suspended for just googling gay stuff on his phone. Her mother is very religious and devoted to Virgin Mary, whereas Brie has trouble even focusing during mass. The family has financial problems and Brie dreams of going to a private acting high school, which would help her become an actress. She’s experiencing her first crush, while listening to her best friend talking excitedly about a different boy every day. And on top of all that, she’s a kid in eight grade.

So much packed into one book, so much trusted on a shoulder of a kid who’s just trying to figure out how to be herself.

My favourite aspect of the book is definitely Brie’s relationship with her mother, though. It starts already a bit strained, with Brie wondering if her mom even likes her, and as Brie gets more and more sure she’s not straight, that relationship only gets worse. I do not mean to say I enjoyed watching Brie navigate her life without that vital support that her mother should have been offering - quite the opposite really. But the way it was framed, it was obvious this is a story for LGBT audience, for kids who also don’t have perfect parents & who need someone to tell them that “hey, you should put yourself first, your mom should love you unconditionally”.

And while Brie’s mom did not know how to deal with her daughter (and the narrative was clear on the fact it’s not her who should be dealing with anything), Brie had a number of supportive people around her. This is not a dark, hopeless story in any capacity. Which is another thing I deeply appreciate: showing that even if your own family doesn’t accept you, there are others who will.

In the Role of Brie Hutchens isn’t just a gay coming-out story, even though that’s a major plot point. It’s a story of a delicate phase of adolescence, of looking for acceptance & reassurance, of figuring out what kind of person you want to be when you grow up.

I was never a huge soap opera fan. I had a ton of changes to watch them when I was younger since I was home during sick days, summer vacation, when I was going part time to community college, and various holiday breaks.

However In The Role of Brie Hutchens not only gave me a sweet story to read, but it even made me look up a few soap opera scenes that are discussed in the book.

Nicole Melleby's In The Role of Brie Hutchens is the story 8th grader Brie Hutchens who ends up accidentally telling her mother that she has been chosen to crown the Mary statue at school to distract her mother when she walks in on Brie looking at photos of one of her favorite actresses. The problem is that no one has been picked for that honor yet. Brie will have to do everything she can to be chosen to crown Mary & get a good role in the school play if she wants her mother to approve of her attending a performing arts high school next year. All while this is going on Brie is dealing with struggles regarding her sexuality and her possible crush on one of her classmates named Kennedy.

First of all, I really loved the idea of a middle grade soap opera viewer. I have not read a lot of books that have characters who watch soaps let alone a middle grade novel. Not only that, I really liked the fact that each chapter started with a description of a coming out scene from a soap opera or just a scene from a soap opera that relates to the chapter in question. As I said before I have never really watched soap operas before, but  I definitely looked up a monologue that Brie recites and references in the book after reading about it.

The next thing I enjoyed about this book was the relationship between Brie and her parents. It felt extremely realistic especially in a Catholic household. I especially love and appreciate that arc that Brie and her mom go through. It was heartwarming, emotional, and just really helped give the story even more things to enjoy.

Finally, I really liked Brie and Kennedy's relationship. It was cute & sweet. There was a semi "enemies to lovers" trope that the book did somewhat that I really liked too. They get to learn more about each other throughout the book including their interests, home lives, and feelings about the world as well as one another.  Their final scene painted a huge grin on my face and without giving anything away...well it just made me really happy. Brie and Kennedy also on their own were just fun characters as well as many of the people in this story. Every character was fleshed out, three dimensional, and realistic.

If I had to say something I didn't like very much about the book I guess I wanted a more concrete answer to this one question that was being brought up throughout the book. In the end we kind of get a confirmation about something regarding Brie's future, but it is not 100%. Since other plot points in this book were confirmed I had really hoped this would be something that we had an exact answer for. I understand why the author may have left if somewhat open-ended, but I just kind of wished that the results had been more concrete than what we are given. This is only a small nit pick though and in no way should be a deciding factor in whether you read this book.

Overall, this book is filled with fun characters, interesting relationships, and even a an almost contagious soap opera connection I was not expecting from a middle grade novel or really any novel. This book is perfect for anyone who loves a little fun & drama in their lives.

4 out of 5 stars

**** out of *****

***Thanks to NetGalley for providing me a complimentary copy of IN THE ROLE OF BRIE HUTCHENS by Nicole Melleby in exchange for my honest review.***

4.5 STARS

Eighth-grader Brie uses old soap opera scenes to make sense of her life and her crushes on girls. Now that her mom works full time, they no longer bond watching General Hospital. Brie isn’t sure her mom will love her if she finds out Brie is gay. Lies, trouble in school and family problems add up to a whole lot of angst for Brie just when Kennedy, the prettiest girl in school, might feel the same way as Brie.

Brie is perfectly imperfect, not the best fit in her catholic school she doesn’t understand her mother’s strong faith. Young readers will relate to wanting to do the right thing and messing up more often than not and fears of disappointing a parent.

As an adult, I loved the snippets of soap opera scenes from the eighties and nineties, but I’m not sure teen readers will be as interested in the references. I watched many of the episodes Nicole Melleby used and laughed out loud when Brie used Guiding Light’s Reva’s “Slut of Springfield” monologue to try out for her school play. Guiding Light went off the air before most tweens were born and without that reverence, I’m not sure the scenes will mean as much, or anything which is why I didn’t round up to 5 stars.

A big recommendation to readers and libraries for the delightful IN THE ROLE OF BRIE HUTCHENS.

I could really feel for the protagonist, how one action cascaded into others. While I could understand her parents' reactions, to me they seemed toned down. Maybe the author didn't want to lose focus on the protagonist or maybe she wasn't brave enough--the tension seemed to resolve itself a little quickly.

Melleby follows her fantastic debut, Hurricane Season, with this phenomenal story. In the Role of Brie Hutchins helps fill the need for more upper MG stories. This one will engage and speak to readers examining their own identities. The author expertly handles the main character’s evolving relationship to religion, her family, and her sexuality. Highly recommended.

Brie loves soap operas. It’s been a way for her to bond with her mom for years. But now Brie has a secret. She googled Kelly Monaco’s name (a soap opera star) and found topless photos. And thing is: Brie likes them.

Her mom walked in on Brie discovering this, but Brie slammed the laptop shut quickly before her mom could realize it. In attempts to distract her mom, she told her that she was picked to crown Mary, a big deal at her Catholic school. But it’s not even true.

Brie quickly begins her mission to earn to that top spot, becoming a better student than she ever has before. As she begins this mission though, she struggles as her mom takes on more hours at work, as she continues to hide that she likes girls, and as she tries to earn that spot to crown Mary.

This book can be a little bit tough at times to read. [Spoiler] Brie is outed to her mom, and her mom doesn’t respond that well. It’s heartbreaking to read, even though it’s realistic for many people.

But the book is beautiful. It takes you in to the story quickly, and you will root for Brie throughout the whole story.

In the Role of Brie Hutchens releases April 21, 2020.

I thoroughly enjoyed this self-discovery, coming-of-age book. Brie's first romantic crush is told in such a compassionate and sweet way and her relationship conflicts with her parents are very believable. I was unsure how I felt about the setting of this story being in a Catholic middle school at first (I felt it narrowed the target audience somewhat), but once I got into the story I was totally convinced it belonged in my public school setting on many levels.

Thank you to NetGalley for an eARC of this book.

There were a lot of things I really enjoyed about this story. I like that Brie explored her sexuality, and tried to figure out what it meant that she had feelings for girls. I like that she tried to reconcile that with her religion, and explored the distance she felt from Catholicism that is such a common occurrence for kids that age. I also really liked the link to soap operas, as they played such a huge part in my own teenager years and my ideas about relationships. This is a very character driven book that felt a bit slow at times, but has so much to offer.