Member Reviews
It was a little too stream-of-consciousness for my taste. I enjoyed reading about aging, growing old, and stories from the author’s life. It was darker than I expected and talked more about death than living at times, which I didn’t see coming, but in retrospect maybe should have. The book was a lot more analytical and matter-of-fact rather than emotional. It felt like reading more like a textbook than a memoir.
This really wasn't the type of read I expected it to be. I thought that the author, who lets us know shes a widow and great grandmother, would bring stories, experiences, life's wisdom etc from a place of having feelings of a life well-lived and appreciated. Not so. What I seemed to read was someone who had underlying anger and resentment about growing old, someone who raged against it. She spoke of the many downsides of getting older - hip fractures, hearing aids, nursing homes, memory issues etc and it read like she had lived bitter disappointments. Perhaps I should've read more reviews but this just wasn't what I thought it would be
This was a delightful read, especially for those approaching or already in, those advanced years.
Thomas has had an incredible life, and shared it very well as she is now moving on through her 80's.
Very enjoyable, a good read and easy to identify with. Thank you to NetGalley for the ARC, ebook for my enjoyment.
2.5 stars, generously rounded up.
Elizabeth Marshall Thomas is 87 when she writes this book. “We’re prejudiced against old age. Hopefully, this book will help with the prejudice. It mentions the rough parts of aging, but only to tell the whole story. So, it’s totally truthful, and it points out the good parts too.”
Generally, the book, like aging, is not that much fun, but occasionally Thomas surprises. “These days my favorite experience is going to bed.” Growing Old, the book, like growing old, (in life) can be a little rambling. She tells the reader that the “book has 3,593 commas, and each fulfills its mission.” (I personally did not care. At the end, she suggests the reader go back and reread – in case they missed some of those lovely punctuations.)
Marshall’s strict evangelical Nana did not help her faith development. She believes that God is a cruel invisible tyrant. She sees death as normal. “I know I’ll have an afterlife, if not a conscious one. My ashes will be mixed with those of my dogs and my family. Maybe some of our molecules will get into the seeds of a nearby plant.“ Even though she doesn’t believe in God, she believes in prayer, which ‘works for some reason.’ Not a whole lot of ‘something like grace’ here.
The tone of the book is chatty. “Now I should look at myself as if I was a thing. Am I doing as well as my woodstove? Probably not, although it seemed worth finding out, but when I did, I got discouraged.” I’ve always wished my grandmothers talked with me more. Now I’m not so sure. (Did you count the commas in the quotation?)
Bones are deteriorating, hearing is failing, hearing aids cost a lot, glaucoma causes problems. The author continues to smoke. The litany goes on and I search for the grace promised in the title.
Marshall talks about assisted living places and suggests that readers do the research before the time comes to go there. I wonder how this fits in the story arc. Another chapter goes into the merits of different methods of body disposal, including cannibalism, cremation and human composting. The high cost of funerals and the company of death doulas is also covered. This is Important end of life info. It just didn’t fit with the chatty musings on aging.
Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for providing an ARC of this book in exchange for an honest review.
Elizabeth leaves little capfuls of water out for the mice in her house. “Every morning I find it almost empty, surrounded by a few mouse droppings.”
This was a pleasure to read. I found the information helpful and enlightening. It also made me laugh at a topic which I found little humor in, until I read this book. The attitude expressed by the author was realistic and independent and determined. All refreshing qualities which are serving her well.
Thank you to Netgalley, the author Elizabeth Marshall Thomas, and the publisher Harper Collins Publishers for granting my request for a free ARC in return for an honest review. I strongly recommend this book. No matter how old you are.
This is a joy to read. I need to buy copies as birthday gifts for my friends who are aging along with me. We need someone else's witty look at getting old. There's pain but there's also joy.
I really enjoyed reading this story from an Octagenarian's point of view! How amazing to me to be 87 years old and be writing a book?!! It's plain to see from Mrs. Thomas's past stories, that she is no ordinary octagenarian, but a woman who's been to far-flung places in the world and has done extensive research and published before, but this subject is one that is radically different from her usual genre of wildlife and tribal observances!
As a 50 year old, I am actively "counting" the years left and realize that I might have less ahead than I've already lived, and the thought is downright depressing, and at times, frightening! However, reading this author's acceptance and readiness for whatever comes lends me some grace as well. She mentions her rejection of Dylan Thomas's cry to "rage against the dying of the light" because she'd rather feel peaceful and acceptance brings peace.
I hope that I can grow to accept things as she has, with grace and peace. I'll most likely be rereading this book in years to come!
Also, I thought that the author's obsession with commas to be adorable, and I can only hope that if she reads this, she doesn't grimace at the placement of mine!
The author's age - 86 - gives her the authority to write about a subject many people don't want to talk about - age and dying. Thomas writes with honesty, candor, and humor about the good and bad parts of aging and though I didn't always agree with her ideas, she seems to have given them a great deal of thought. She gives some valuable information on retirement living communities, nursing homes, burial or cremation decisions, etc. She's obviously led a remarkable life and I won't be surprised to hear of her living to be over 100. I was disappointed she threw in occasional political jabs which I thought were unnecessary and distracting; but overall, I thought the book was excellent.
I enjoyed this book. I loved that the author addressed the issues of aging in the way she knew best....how it affected and is affecting her. I appreciated her honesty and humor while sharing her experiences. Having recently been a caregiver for my father, I felt in tune with her comments about hospice care and how important “just the right person” can be. Along with the forthright way she said that death needs to be addressed before it happens so both you and family are prepared, and your wishes are met. The way she ended the book with her comment about the importance of “the comma” and her explanation of it earlier in the book hit home with me, as that is how I’ve always dealt with the comma in punctuation. But my thought also led me to ponder the comma’s in our lives...and how we need to stop and think about things sometimes before we proceed. As I am nearing the magic number of 70 myself......I understood much of where the author takes the reader. I received an ARC of this book from NetGalley and Harper Collins in return for an honest review, which this has been. #NetGalley #GrowingOld
In GROWING OLD, Elizabeth Marshall Thomas shares 87 years of wisdom in living and aging with triumphs and failures laid out plain and true. There is no dismissing the challenges nor crowing only about the exceptional "ageless" wonders living adventures that most of us only ever dream about, even when we are much younger, fitter, and reckless. In plain, poetic prose, Thomas takes us on an informed, marvelous journey starting with the observation that "Death is the price we pay for life" and such a life it is. I felt like I was inside her mind, her heart, experiencing what it is to be fully conscious and present with her, including the best time of day when she settles in a single-bed cot with two dogs and three cats. She does not dismiss trials nor surprising joys and delivers an extraordinary piece that transformed how I think about aging, especially my own. My deepest admiration to Ms. Thomas on this accomplished book that weaves personal and professional including extraordinary stories about lives and times that enriched my own.
This book was not what I expected, but I did find it interesting. I expected a guide on managing aging and what to expect. This was mainly an author’s life experiences sprinkled with opinions and a bit of advice. It read like blog articles or essays combined to create a book.
The 87 year old author did lead a fascinating life. Her tips on planning for senior living and burial/cremation were thought-provoking. Reading this may help me better understand my mother and mother-in-law and the challenges they face. It will also encourage me to care for myself and make preparations for how I hope to live out my final years. 3.5 stars.
Thank you to Harper Collins Publishing and NetGalley for this eARC in exchange for an unbiased review.
Ms. Thomas is an excellent writer who has published a number of books about the natural world. I was attracted to this book initially because it was both a memoir and a reflection on aging. She puts a lot of humor into her writing. One very humorous spot to me as someone who also writes, was her discussion of commas. Another humorous spot was her discussion of not being able to find lost items and not remember names of people. I could relate to the name-forgetting problem and I am far younger than 88!
Ms. Thomas writes openly about her agnosticism about God and heaven. She was introduced to Christianity by her grandmother, but just did not ever believe it. As a Christian, I found it good to get an insight into the thoughts of a non-believer.
This book would be a good read for anyone who would like some insights into life through the views of a very literate 88 year old woman.
Growing Old was a great combination of a memoir about aging and about the author's memories of her earlier life, as well as tips about how to prepare for the practical things we should all do as we reach our later years. I appreciated her personal recommendations about investigating assisted living facilities and burial options. It made me want to go back and read even more of her books than I already have!
Elizabeth Marshall Thomas, an 87-year-old mother, grandmother, and noted naturalist and anthropologist, has a huge reservoir of life experiences to draw from and she puts them to good use in her lastest book on aging.
Someone once said "Growing old isn't for sissies!" and there's truth to that. Growing old can be hard (and hard to accept) for many reasons, and Thomas deals with many of them. Her writing is observational, quirky, direct and at times laugh-out-loud funny. She is a truth-teller, and I admire that. I enjoyed this book far more than I expected to. I give it 3.5 stars rounded up to 4 stars.
My thanks to NetGalley and HarperOne for allowing me to read a copy of this book in exchange for an unbiased review. All opinions stated here are my own.
A forthcoming look at positive aging and death. A fresh perspective with sound advice. The tone of the writing makes for a fast read. Thank you NetGalley for the ARC.
I’m not sure what exactly I had expected from this, but what I got was a sometimes funny, sometimes very sad, but always very candid book about aging.
At 87 years-old, Elizabeth Marshall Thomas, is certainly old enough to give us a bit of a heads up about the aging process. Along the way she shares some very interesting tidbits about her life, travels, family, and friends. She also talks about problems she is facing such as hearing loss, along with the search for hearing aids, her concern about something happening to her when she is in the shower and how she always keeps her phone close enough to grab, as well as the inability to always come up with the word she wanted to use in a sentence.
Some of the information, for example different types of burials and picking a place to live when you are older, are certainly topics that will be helpful for the elderly or even those who are caring for the elderly. There is such a wealth of information that I think this book will benefit many.
The author discusses a wide variety of topics on aging., sometimes with humor. I find that as I grow older I have to laugh about much of the aging process. This book was very enlightening.
Many thanks to HarperCollins Publishers and to NetGalley for providing me with a galley in exchange for my honest opinion.
From the description of this book, I was expecting a recounting of a life well lived that was warm and endearing, one that reflected joy in the experiences the author had had, and a feeling of a “life well lived”. Instead, what I was reminded of was the Dylan Thomas poem “Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night”. In many ways, it struck me as someone who was, indeed, raging against the dying of the light.
There were glimpses of an extraordinary life lived by the author, experiences beyond what most people have had, and a ferocious desire to maintain independence as long as was physically possible. I also felt there was some humor, but it was a humor I didn’t truly understand. Perhaps it was a Yankee type of humor, one that comes from living in the taciturn northeastern United States. Or, perhaps, it was humor that was born from the vast experiences of the author, many of which were hinted at, but not detailed in the book.
The end result was not so much disappointment, as a feeling that, no matter how many times I read the book, I wouldn’t understand it. Was that because my family has lived exclusively in the south? We can trace our ancestors back to their roots in 1500 Scotland, but in the United States they all lived exclusively in the deep south. That meant it was a struggle for me to understand her environment and to put context around her words. Her narrative didn’t do that for me, either, so I was left with a feeling of somehow having missed the point of the book.
My thanks to Harper Collins Publishers and NetGalley for providing me with an advanced digital reader copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. Perhaps there is a specific audience for whom this book will resonate with “ah ha” moments, but I’m not sure who that audience is.
This was a realistic look at what happens when you grow old - not just "older," but into your 80s. It's not the "sure, you can hike the Appalachian Trail and dance the night away" no matter how old you are sort of book - the idea that age is really just a state of mind. She's realistic about the mental and physical decline, while recognizing that there are advantages to growing old as well - a perspective on life, an ability to "read" people and situations that comes with experience. But there are problems as well, and we might just as well accept that and think about how to deal with it.
The author is also realistic - she knows that she has a strong support network, including a son and his family who live right across the road, allowing her to stay in her own home. She recognizes that not everyone is in this position, so she devotes some time to "senior living" facilities and the advantages and disadvantages of moving to one. She doesn't hesitate to discuss dying, making plans for after one's death (funerals, disposal of one's body, etc.), and while it seems morbid - hey, this is somewhere we're all going to get eventually and I found it useful to think about these things.
Despite what could become a very morbid topic, the author writes with grace and humor. I found myself laughing at various points, despite the serious subject, because she used a turn of phrase that tickled me. It was a difficult topic to read and think about, but in spite of that, I enjoyed reading it. I am (I hope) a few years away from a lot of these issues, but that makes it the right time to start thinking about them.
This is a book that is well worth reading. I don't imagine younger readers would relate as well to it, but it would certainly give them a better understanding of their parents and grandparents and what they're living with. And for those of us who are older, it's a good guide to areas that need to be anticipated and considered.
This book infuriated me. She sleeps on a cot with her 3 dogs & 2 cats?! C'mon. Why should we care? I felt like I was reading ramblings from my neighbor, There ARE extraordinary people in their 80's that I would rather hear from, such as elders working in the Peacecorps, athletes, musicians, artists. I didn't get it? I missed the point as to why I should read her memoir.