Thanks so much to @netgalley for the chance to review With or Without You by Caroline Leavitt. I loved the structure of this book - starting at the ending! Simon and Stella had been together for about 20 years, and were feeling as through their relationship had run its course. In her early 40s, Stella has a medical emergency and falls into a coma. Upon wakening, her whole world has changed.

As a woman in her 40s, this glimpse into the "what if" was really cool. Great book club read!

LOVE this book and this author. What happens if you wake up without your memories? Or after living through a coma? Brilliant. Highly recommend.

This book is about the unpredictability of life, choices, changes and love. It’s been several years since I read a book by Leavitt. This was an easy, but emotional read. I enjoyed it much!

Review published on Goodreads, 10 August 2020:

I'm not sure why this novel didn't quite do it for me, but it just ... didn't. WITH OR WITHOUT YOU is a character-driven novel and the story people are certainly well-drawn. They're complex, realistic, and relatable. I didn't like any of them all the time; overall, though, they're a likable bunch. Plot-wise, there's not a ton of action in this book. I got a little bored with it. The book does ruminate on some interesting questions about aging, forgiveness, letting things go, and selfishness. While I think the characters learn a lot about all of these subjects, in the end, this book still didn't feel all that satisfying to me. It was just an okay read.

RATING: 2/5 STARS

I requested this book because of its endorsement by Madeline Miller, but this book wasn't for me unfortunately. I couldn't relate to the main characters Stella and Simon, which is important in a character driven story like this one.

eh.

This book was saved for me by the incredibly talented Julia Whelan who narrates the audio book. She made this so easily digestible at parts where had I been reading it in paperback, I would have quickly DNF.

This is the story of Simon and Stella. Simon is an aspiring musician when Stella has a traumatic medical episode and ends up in a coma only to awake not herself. From there, we see the underbelly of a relationship that is holding on my a thread. It's a character study in relationships and although the writing is well done, I found myself losing interest and not wanting to pull for either of them.

Thank you to Netgalley for an advanced reader copy of this book.

I should have been prepared for the emotional punch this book would pack. The cover alone conveys it's going to be emotional. I still wasn't ready though.
Seeing a character who has never really had to be an adult suddenly forced into that role was fantastic and something you don't see that often. I really enjoyed that journey. We also don't often get characters in coma's who awaken as slightly different people. But we got that with Stella and that too was interesting. So beyond the emotion the individual journey's as well as the one they take together are what make this book kind of sparkle!

I like a book that makes me think "What would I do?" and this one definitely did that!

Thank you to the publisher and Netgalley for a copy in exchange of an honest review!

I'm currently clearing out all of the books that were published in 2019-20 from my title feedback view!

With or Without You touches on trauma, love and heartbreak, and the character growth as you become older. Stella and Simon have been in love and happily married for 20 years, until after a shocking accident, Stella falls into a coma. During the time Stella is in a coma, we get the perspective of Simon and Stella’s friend, Libby, as they navigate ways to get Stella to wake up.

I gave With or Without You 3.5 star, liking the overall story and plot, however, there were simply a few holes here and there. First, while I did get the ARC of this book from Algonquin Books, I may have left it for a whole year until finally picking this up. Ultimately, I decided to pick up the audiobook and that was the right decision. I wasn’t feeling motivated to read the eBook so the audiobook was the right decision and the narrator did a terrific job and I would give her a 5/5 rating for the narration. Other than that, this book was good and left me on the fence between 3 or a 4 star because it was written really well and touches on simply growing older and changing. Although for Stella, she wakes up from her coma finding that she has artistic talents.

In the beginning of With or Without You, Stella is a practicing nurse and Simon is a rockstar hopeful and while his band, Mightycondria (I think that is how you spell it, it may be wrong), takes off, because of Stella being in the coma, he can’t join in the fame and glory. Simon must learn to deal with growing up and out of the rockstar phase and being a responsible adult and putting himself to work, taking care of the bills, and keeping the house clean. In the few months Stella is in this coma, all of them change; Stella, Simon, and Libby, whom we get acquainted to in the coma period.

I liked this book as it really touches up on relationships growing out of love and taking examples on how people change and their interests change and really not forcing people to give up their dreams. In the beginning, we are told Stella mainly gave up being a full time nurse in order to join Simon on tour with his band, giving up her dream as a nurse, and then slowly, at the start of the book, their interests are different, their goals are different.

This was such a good part of the book and I really enjoyed the aspect of character changes for each and every one of the three characters. I think I like Simon the best, especially his character growth. In the beginning we see Simon stuck in his rockstar immature ways, but he was by far my favorite because of how much he grew.

My issue with Stella was that she seemed to act rather immature after getting out of the coma. I just found her character to be too selfish and she never really considered Simon’s part of the relationship, especially her actions after getting out of the coma and trying to figure out how to recover from it. She just didn’t sit right with me and I just wasn’t a fan of hers.

Overall, this book was good and although this was rather slow, it picked up and I really started to get invested in it. Although the ending was a little rushed and I would have like a little more content towards the end, I did have a good time reading this and found 3.5 stars good. Just that my main issue was Stella and the ending and the starting pacing of this book.

Stella is a nurse and a nurturer by instinct. Stella cares for everyone around her including, Simon. Simon is headed to LA to revive his band’s popularity.
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Unexpectedly Stella falls ill into a coma, but who is going to nurture the nurturer?
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Stella’s best friend Libby becomes her doctor and her caregiver. When Stella awakes two months later, she awakes to a new reality. One where she has a stunning talent to draw people’s portraits, showcasing their very souls and one where her best friend and her partner formed a strong bond.
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This is a story of love, loss, loyalty, hard truths and hope.
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Thank you #Algonquin and #NetGalley for an arc in exchange for an honest review

With or Without You begins with a fascinating premise. Stella and Simon have been dating for years, and suddenly, it seems their paths are diverging. One evening, as Simon is preparing to fly out west with his band for one last chance at making it big, Stella and Simon have a fight. A big fight. When Simon wakes up in the morning, prepared to reach some resolution with Stella, he finds that she has fallen into a coma.

The book alternates between three perspectives: those of Simon, of Stella, and of Stella's best friend Libby, a doctor who provides a lot of support for Simon as he tries to sustain the life he and Stella had together.

Then, two months later, Stella wakes up. And everything is different.

While the premise is the catchy part of this description (and it's based on the author's own experiences: read "I Was in a Coma and No One Will Tell Me What Happened" on the Daily Beast site for more details), it's the characters here who were, for me, the best parts of this book. They are layered and nuanced and flawed. I so appreciated the way that Leavitt explored what it means for any two people in a "normal" relationship to change . . . and also what happens when something decidedly NOT normal happens and heightens that typical evolution that people (and couples) go through. This is definitely a book to add to your list!

I just finished With or Without You, and this one took me a while to get through. It just didn't hook me, and I didn't empathize with any of the characters. I thought they were all pretty selfish in their own particular ways, and it felt hard connecting with them.

I think Caroline Leavitt's writing was beautiful, and I enjoyed the second half of the book more than the first. The plot picked up a little once the drama and emotions kicked in.

Thank you to the publisher and @netgalley for this book. I was so intrigued by the premise of the book of Stella waking up from a coma and how she has become a completely different person. I was drawn from the first page and did not want to put this down. I love the journey that is taken by Stella, Simon and Libby. The character development of these characters were so well done.

Stella and Simon have been together for years. They love each other, but fear they’ve drifted apart. In an effort to regain their connection, they take mind altering substances one evening. As a result, Stella ends up in a coma. When she emerges from her coma two months later, she is different somehow. She wants different things, she has new interests, and Simon feels left behind. Life can change in an instant, and as a result can change each of us. That change can ripple out to our loved ones, and in effect, our communities. This book is about what happens next.

My thoughts:
This book had me gripped from the beginning. I think there’s something really interesting about the idea of what someone in a coma can actually hear and make sense of. What is that experience like?! The idea that someone can wake up from a coma and be entirely different is an exciting thing to read about, especially for someone really interested in human behavior. The brain is an endless mystery!

We get three POV’s, Stella, Simon, and Libby - Stella’s besty and doctor. The story was really about Stella, and Stella and Simon’s relationship. But also, it was about people. It had an amazing combination of being character driven, but also with excellent twists that kept things moving.

The characters in this book were real, flawed, and deeply human... terribly human. I rooted for, and at the same time was frustrated by all of them (except Stella’s mom 🥰). They made decisions that I could understand, but that also literally made me cringe as I read.

This book has a gorgeous cover, and that probably drew me to it in the first place. 😜 But I’m so glad because I really enjoyed the experience of reading this book. It was gritty at times, but lovely, and complex. Definitely one that will stick with me for a while.

“Nothing and no one stays still or stays the same. Everything and everyone changes. We all have multitudes inside of us, each of them young with hope."

WITH OR WITHOUT YOU is a novel about the many ways we change and no longer recognize ourselves or those around us. Simon and Stella are at a bit of a crossroads in their relationship, each wondering to what extent they are willing to go in loving each other. Stella ends up falling into a mysterious coma, and from there the story follows what happens to Stella and Simon and their relationship. I loved the themes of home, belonging, grief, and success throughout the book and the overall message that great things can be born even out of tragedy. 4/5⭐️—I liked it! now out in paperback!

After reading the description of With or Without You, I knew I had to read it. It sounded interesting and unusual and I had to know what would happen to a couple after a coma.

The book starts out with tension between the two main characters, Simon and Stella. These two have been together for a long time but their relationship has hit a crossroads. Their relationship started 20 years ago and it was all about the excitement and Simon's music, band and touring. They were young and having fun. As the characters got older, Stella knew they needed more. She is now a successful nurse and wants more out of life. She wants to be married, wants a mortgage and a family. But Simon isn't there, even if he is approaching middle age. He is a man-child. In fact, his band has just been handed a huge offer to make the trek from NY to LA and open for a major act. It's the resurgence he's been looking for. When Stella and Simon have a heated discussion about her not joining him on this trip because she doesn't feel well and she doesn't think this is where she sees her life going, Simon adds some fuel to the fire that ends up changing their lives in a majorly drastic way.

After a night of fun that Simon doesn't remember, he wakes up, but Stella does not. Stella is in a coma and Simon has to learn what life without Stella looks like. He has to step up and take care of all the household duties that she did willingly. This changes Simon's outlook on life and doesn't go unnoticed by Libby who is also one of Stella's doctors. Why did it take something so tragic and life changing to get Simon to grow into the man that Stella was searching for? And what does Simon give up to "grow up"? Does he find happiness?

When Stella wakes from her coma, life is different and so is she. She is not who Simon remembers and Stella doesn't feel comfortable in her own body. She knows who she was, but she feels so disconnected to that person and she just wants to get back to life. Libby tries to help Stella, but everyone has changed in her eyes and they cannot adjust to her and who she is. Libby, Simon, their parents. Everyone.

With or Without You is an eye opening and unique story told from 3 POVs. Not only from Stella and Simon, but also Stella's friend Libby. This was a story of adults being forced to grow up later in life and recognizing their worth, self discovery and finding what makes you happy. I liked that we got to see the battles of all three characters and the various ways they handled the stresses of life and finding the love they all deserved, no matter the pasts that were tying them down.

Caroline Leavitt created a unique look into the minds of creatives and individuals looking for something more when they feel like they've come to a crossroads in their lives. The story was captivating and emotional and kept me turning the pages throughout. There was a little lag in the middle and had me questioning the characters and their actions, but I was always wondering what was going to happen next. Each character grew and had their own revelations and whole arc that we got to witness from beginning to end. I did have a little issue with a major decision by Stella at the end, but it did not take away from the story and the journey of the characters. This was my first book by Ms Leavitt, but my interest has definitely been piqued and I'd love to see what else she has written.
Overall, this was a beautiful yet painful book with flawed characters that was well written and unusual. Would definitely recommend.

Wow, this writing is so eloquent, emotional, intense, and thought-provoking. {Thanks Algonquin, for the gifted copy!}

Stella awakens from a 2-month coma with some stark differences, and must navigate how that will change her life, and the relationships around her. The journeys of healing on which the three characters embark are realistic, flawed, heartbreaking, and yet so wonderfully hopeful. I could NOT put this book down.

Perfect for literary fiction fans who enjoy stories of self-discovery and hope, and aren’t afraid to see parts of themselves in a story of rediscovery. If you read and enjoyed Brain on Fire, then definitely read this!

“With or Without You” moved me and made me appreciate life, and I found it a wonderful and moving experience.

The author narrates the story in a poignant manner where you immediately fall for the characters. Looking back at the storyline, I realize that the plot is simple and straightforward, and not much happens. Yet, the way the author conveyed the characters’ emotions made me root for all of them.

All the three characters, be it, Stella, Simon, or Libby, are neither good nor bad and have shades of grey. They are all people like you and me who are constantly evolving. At times, they are moving, loveable, hypocrites, and people I could connect with. I loved Stella’s newfound passion for celebrating life with running and art as she embraces her second chance. I also rooted for Simon and could relate to him. It is never easy giving up your dreams and growing you to survive. Although he makes a few bad choices, my heart still went out to him. Similarly, I liked Libby as well and the struggles she faces while listening to her heart.

The author also did an excellent job at highlighting the character’s past and what they experienced that affected their decisions. It is also clear to see the amount of research she did in how coma patients recover and how their behavior towards life changes. I found Stella’s emotions fascinating in the second half. She, too, does things that make her a hypocrite, but a part of you still accepts her reasons for her actions.

Overall, “With or Without You” is a beautiful, emotional, dramatic story emphasizing how our lives keep changing and how we adapt to the new situation.

When I began reading this book, I'll admit, I had a little trouble getting hooked on the story. The writing was a bit rough in the beginning, and there were random quotes that came across weird to me (for example: "...that even kissing was tasting each other's DNA and seeing if you could make good, healthy children"). I wasn't a fan of the way Stella pushed and pushed for Simon to have a kid with her, and I especially didn't like it that he pushed a drug on her while they were drinking.

But getting past the rough beginning and into the plot of the story we were given in the synopsis, it was easier to fall into Caroline Leavitt's writing and the making of the story. The characters developed in a way I haven't seen yet: they were allowed to be messy, allowed to make mistakes and choices they knew they were making, allowed to shape out of those mistakes and choices. I'm not used to seeing that in books, and it was a different experience for me that I liked. That being said though, I don't think that it was really pushed that, "hey, cheating on your partner is a bad  thing to do." I got the impression that this was more of a push for character development than it was a lesson or outlook to see and avoid at all costs. Along with that, I didn't really like that Stella's infidelity was never brought up after the fact, but Simon's was capitalized on.

Moving past that, I really liked that Leavitt pushed readers to understand that people can change after trauma, and that sometimes, what can be known as someone's normal can shift at the drop of a hat to be someone's past. Because of that, I'm calling this book a "coming-of-age novel" but for Adult readers instead. Leavitt really emphasized on the fact that someone can change outlooks on life into their forties, or even later than that. We're taught at such a young age to believe that we need to know exactly who we are and what we want to be by the time we graduate, that when we come to realize that our decisions as teenagers aren't what we continue to want as Adults, it's looked down upon. But Leavitt moved to overturn that stigmatized stereotype with this book, and I really enjoyed seeing that.

Lastly, I wasn't entirely satisfied with the ending. Normally, I can predict what will happen before I can actually finish the book, but with this one, it came out of nowhere. While I liked that aspect about it, I wasn't a fan of how rushed it became. When I turned the last page of the book and was met with the "acknowledgments" section, I immediately thought, "really? That's it?" Though I did like the bit of openness the author gave, I wish we had a bit more build-up to the ending.

Overall, this book was an okay read for me. I enjoyed it, and although it isn't a favorite, I think I did learn quite a bit from it that will definitely have lasting impressions on me. For that, I rate this book 3 stars. Even though I didn't love-love this book, I did really like Leavitt's writing style and voice as an author, and I will consider giving her other books a read in the future.

Book Review : With or Without You by Caroline Leavitt

This emotional, contemplative read my first novel by this author but it certainly won’t be my last.

Stella and her longtime partner Simon have been living in NYC, both increasingly wondering if they actually want different things from life. A nurse craving stability, Stella is yearning for a house, a child, marriage. Simon, a musician who’s brief fame fizzled out years ago is still waiting for his next big break. Things are about to come to a head when Stella unexpectedly falls ill, ending up in a coma with her recovery unsure.

This novel is a poignant examination of the changing nature of relationships, of desires, of happiness. The characters evolve in both realistic and interesting ways over the course of the novel, and where they end up is surprising. They make choices that seem true to both themselves and also poor at times. They are messy, complex people who make messy, complex choices. I really enjoyed my time spent with Stella, Simon and Libby - they each had distinct voices and the changing points of view allowed me to see all sides of their stories.

With major themes of love, resilience, identity and changing relationships, there’s a lot to consider while reading. I appreciated that the endings were open-ended and hopeful despite the more heartbreaking moments throughout.
I recommend this for those who enjoy character-driven novels that allow you to ruminate on character’s thoughts and choices. A quick yet contemplative novel with vivid characters, it’s worth a look!

Thanks very much to Algonquin Books and the author for a gifted e-copy of this novel. All opinions are my own.