Sadly, I did not have time to read this book before it was archived, however, I still believe it is a worthwhile read!

Thank you #netgalley and @shewritespress for this e-ARC in return for my honest review.

This was a bit of a slow start for me. I'm very particular about what non-fiction I read, but something about this just spoke to me: perhaps I, myself, feel 'Brave(ish)', or at least want to. Regardless, I'm so glad I read.

I have to say that I was initially a bit envious of a family having a 'handbook' until I twigged it was a metaphorical one, and that my family likely had one too (and possibly two: one for the girls, one for the boy). Anyway, family history/mild resentments aside, I am close to the author's age and although had a very different life growing up and am vanilla pudding compared to her Harrod's rich Red Velvet cake (no, seriously - to both), I related to many parts of the book, and particularly the last couple of chapters, where she really comes into herself and starts to fully own her place in the world.

A few of my highlighted phrases:

-'Do I really still feel that I don't have the right to exist (if I'm not a saint, saviour, and sentry)?'
-'I tell a story that leaves me shuddering with sadness - about how I repeatedly gave away my self-respect to try to hold men to me.'
-'Over the next nine days, a massage therapist tells me that I swallowed pain for so long that my belly got full and transferred the pain to my back to carry around. He says that's why my lumbar is so tender.'
-'...the emotional payoff has to come from inside me - not from the praise of others for my people pleasing.'

All of these resonated in me for different reasons: I'm trying to write a book. I lost my dad (40 years ago, grieving still has not happened). I struggle to believe my own worth and deservedness. I give away my self-respect to please men/people. I struggle with internal/external validation. Etc. Etc. I think maybe we can all relate to these sorts of things to varying degrees.

BUT. Reading this, the personal story of a woman who is so well-educated, well-travelled, has a loving and well-meaning (imperfect) family, a good and kind man as her husband, and a real, genuine curiosity about the world, and yet who struggled so much with her place in it, really struck a chord in me. Lit a little spark in me like Margaret's god spark was lit in her one day. I finished it on Valentine's Day, so make of that what you will (I, however, do not believe in coincidence).

This book won't appeal to everyone. Not every book can be for every body, and that's okay. But I loved this and would recommend it to anyone who is feeling a little adrift.

Read this more for the travelogue aspect once I got into it... I wanted to feel for the author, but many a time, her life of privilege, that she was born into and carried on through marriage, just seemed a little like 'in the clouds' and a tad too perfect to really find issue with it. Yet, issues there were, which then brought this narrative to a relatable level - you can have much but you can't have it all... Again, I loved the travelogue aspect way more than the personal feels of this book, but it is one that makes you stop and ponder and ask yourself what you really want from life and are you getting it

This book was not what I was expecting. The concept and storyline were incredible, but the writing was not for me. This is not to say that it will not be right for someone else. Overall, I really enjoyed the book.

Brave(ish) by Margaret Davis Ghielmetti

Rating 3.75 / 5 Stars

Publication Date - 9/15/2020

** Thank you to Netgalley, She Writes Press, and of course, Margaret Davis Ghielmetti, for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

I really, really enjoyed this memoir. There were two reasons I requested it - first, I really felt a connection with the words “recovering perfectionist”, and second, there was a connection to travel, one of my favourite things and one of the things I miss the most ever since the pandemic began.

As an ex-pat myself, I really enjoyed that readers were able to see that living in a different country is not everything it seems to be. Many things it is an easy and fun adventure, where you live amongst people and places others dream of - but in reality, it is mainly just...home. You work, you have friends, and you are often missing the place you came from. Being an ex-pat is far from glamorous and I think Margaret did a great job of showing the other side of it.

I do not have many cons in regard to this memoir, and I am really glad I got to read it during my downtime. I liked the transformation of Margaret and seeing everything through her eyes was great. Her writing has the ability to place you in the scene she is describing. I recommend this to anyone who feels a connection to the themes and pretty much anyone who wants a fun read to escape.

This fabulous memoir begins like a travelogue, as author Margaret Davis Ghielmetti accompanies her spouse, a hotelier who manages exotic and exclusive Four Seasons properties around the world. Like any traveler, she is enamored of the adventure, and finally has the time to pursue the novel she has always wanted to write.

But living abroad is not always easy, nor is it easy to write. As the story turns inward, Davis Ghielmetti realizes she has been living according to the unspoken rules in what she calls The Handbook, passed down from generation to generation, prescribing how to behave in the world. It's a handbook we've all been given, even if ours is different than hers.

Over the course of her many moves to five different continents and countless countries, to caring for and losing her aging parents, we watch the author discover she can choose who she wants to be and how she wants to be. And in observing, we discover that we can do the same.

Brave(ish) is a memoir rich in details, discoveries, storytelling and inspiration.

Highly recommended to those interested in travel stories and memoir.

Thank you to She Writes Press for the review copy.

This was a very interesting memoir. I loved the travel aspect and seeing all the places the author went.

I liked the combination of travelogue plus memoir. I enjoyed reading about the author living in other countries and experiencing the cultures vicariously through her. I think she adapted as well as she could, but also conformed to rigid standards that were arbitrarily set. It was a quick pleasant read. I appreciate when authors allow readers to peak into their lives.

Thanks to @booksforwardpr, @margaretghielmetti, and @shewritespress for my gifted copy of Brave(ish)! In the book, Ghielmetti documents her life as a “trailing spouse” to her husband’s job with the Four Seasons, the adventures around the world they experience, and the journey towards living her own life, not one that was laid out for her.

The adventures that Ghielmetti finds her in, along with her inner dialogue about them, are absolutely fascinating. It was interesting to hear about all of these magnificent places she was living in, and things she was seeing, and then see how she processed a move back to Chicago. Ghielmetti touches on a variety of events that happened while she was out of the country as well, including where she was on 9/11 and the decline of her parents’ health. I think that there is a lot to learn in this book - not only about how to live as an expatriate, but also about how to live for yourself, and not according to any guidebook. One example was how Ghielmetti rejected the notion that a GM’s wife was to throw nightly cocktail parties. She ended up doing it on her own terms. There are many more ways in which she does this throughout the book, but I’ll leave those up for the reader to discover.

If you’re in need of an escape, Brave(ish) is out now.

Thank you so much to Books Forward PR, Netgalley, and She Writes Press for my advanced digital copy! 𝘉𝘳𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘪𝘴𝘩: 𝘈 𝘔𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘪𝘳 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘙𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘗𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘪𝘴𝘵 is a well-written memoir with such a personal tone, it feels like talking to a friend. The author details her experience living in various countries and the struggles that she dealt with along the way. I found the main themes of her memoir interesting and loved the overall “live your best life and follow your goals” message. I did find my thoughts drifting at times but this book still ended up inspiring me to travel more!
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Brave(ish) is a sweet memoir of a traveling spouse, who follows her hotelier husband all over the world, while on a quest herself for self-discovery. While the first half of the book was a bit slow and repetitive, I really enjoyed learning some of culture and customs in Egypt, Thailand, and Singapore, as well as their travel adventures in the other countries they visited. If you like memoirs or books with a heavy travel emphasis, this is one to pick up.

Where it fell short for me? I felt frustrated at Margaret many times and just wanted her to relax and tend to her own needs. I was raised with a 'Handbook', too, so I understand to an extent. But to never accept help from anyone and never put my own needs first? Phew - I was mentally exhausted for her. Also, the constant use of pet names in conversations with her husband felt excessive.

An enjoyable memoir describing the travels and the different countries that the author has visited. The main premise of the book is the importance of following your own goals and what lights your soul instead of only taking care the other people in your life.

This was a fun, quick read. The book is a memoir focusing on one woman's forced worldly adventures. Her husband's job takes them to Paris, Egypt, Thailand, and Singapore. There's so much to learn and experience in these unfamiliar places and reading about the author's journey was fun. I think the book could have benefited from a bit more self-reflection and a more comprehensive acknowledgment of the author's privilege, but altogether this was enjoyable.

I really enjoyed reading about all the travel and new places the author got to go to. I am not sure I was able to relate as much as I originally thought I would. While I am a people pleaser, I don't do it to the detriment of myself. Overall the book kept my interest and made me want to travel much more than I have.

This book was not what I expected. While it was slow in parts, the author wrote a very engaging book. I didn't know how "fun" this book was be, but it was very enjoyable. Keeping a plot in a nonfiction book, to keep it moving, is admirable. Instead of a typical self-help book that gives advice, with small anecdotes, this is written as a story, with advice sprinkled throughout. I've never heard of or read this author before. I would love to read more of her books.

I finished this book almost a week ago and it took me a while to find the words to review.
This isn’t an easy one for me because while it wasn’t the ideal read for me, it wasn’t due to the writing and it is definitely the right book for others.
I was drawn in not by the title, but the description; getting over your (literally) painful or detrimental perfectionism is something I desperately need. Unfortunately, every person is different and pressures to be perfect are very different. I struggled to relate with a person living such a different lifestyle. At the core, I understood the problem, but it was a different world.
Then came a twist I didn’t expect, something which stripped away any barriers which could exist between two people (I won’t give this away) and I started seeing her very differently.
So has it helped me? Maybe a little.
Did I still enjoy reading it? I did. Mostly because the travels were interesting and anecdotes funny which made for an entertaining read.
I can’t imagine a world following a husband and focusing on helping someone else achieve their dream (call me too young or too independent of a different generation or just not married) so I couldn’t relate, but I would definitely recommend it to people who can better relate to the life of the author.

Thank you to the publisher for an ARC of this book in exchange for an honest opinion.

Upon a first look, the concept behind Ghielmetti's "Brave(ish)" sounded very promising - who doesn't want to read about the adventures of an expat abroad?

Unfortunately, her writing style is lacklustre and overly simplistic. Even though she promises herself to be the best expat abroad, her experiencing (and thus narrating) of the places she visits along the way show a thoroughly Westernised, fairly stereotypical approach to traveling. She makes little effort to integrate within the places she visits and as a result barely scratches the surface of the local cultures. I'm assuming that this wouldn't be a concern for US readers, but someone who has more experience with traveling and reading traveling memoirs might find the overall approach somewhat lacking.

This Book sadly didn’t wow me, I had high hopes for this book but I didn’t like the repetitive of the book.

I also struggled to finish this book.

With Thanks to NetGalley & She Writes Press for this Copy in exchange for this review.

Thank you to the publisher for an ARC of this book in exchange for an honest opinion.

This is travel writing with a memoir twist, or a memoir with a travel twist, but it works and I particularly enjoyed the travel section and reading about what it was like to live in Egypt and Thailand. I also appreciated the author's ability to honour the memory of her parents while discovering that she didn't have to run her life according to their 'rulebook'. I found the author occasionally a little self-congratulatory but it's possible this was the persona she chose to present and much of this was tongue-in-cheek in a way which would come across more clearly in person. An enjoyable read.

I was unsure about this book at the start because it's not my usual genre but I was not left disappointed. An interesting, insightful read.