I’m limping to the reading finish line this year, and in order to get there, I’m choosing books that demand very little from me. Ghosts by Dolly Alderton fitted the bill nicely.

‘Chick-lit’… ‘Women’s fiction’… I’m not even sure what these labels mean now. When I was in my twenties, it meant you could walk into a book store, pick up a novel with a hot pink cover and a picture of a stiletto shoe on the front, and be sure that you would have a fun bit of reading ahead. This genre has not been my choice in the last 15 odd years, but 2020 seems to have changed all sorts of things.

Ghosts is a millennial version of Bridget Jones. Thirty-something single Nina is looking for love, and the story focuses around her friendships, relationship history, and what happens when people are at life different stages. The title plays into a couple of elements of the plot – ‘ghosting’, a phenomenon that I have been too old to experience but is apparently common on the dating scene; and the ‘ghosts’ of ourselves, which is explored in the context of relationships and also gently through the character of Nina’s father, who has been diagnosed with dementia. This theme speaks to the idea that we are ‘who we are’ in the context of our relationships, and interactions with others.

So much is how we perceive someone and the memories we have of them, rather than the facts of who they are. Maybe instead of saying ‘I love you’ we should say ‘I imagine you’.

The story follows all of the standard rom-com rules (what we’re looking for is often right in front of us; the more you look, the less you find; things that seem too good to be true, usually are) but we don’t read these books for complex plots. Instead, they’re the reading equivalent of comfort food – they offer familiarity, a sense of shared experience, reassurance that love will triumph.

Alderton’s writing is humorous without being overdone, with a lot of the fun coming via wry observations through Nina’s increasingly tarnished millennial lens. The descriptions of hen’s weekends, weddings, and friends telling birth stories were all particularly good.

This is what happens when people with children get too worked up for a night out – they tire themselves out with anticipation, set themselves up for a fall with their bravado, get stage fright then ultimately go home after two pints.

‘LADIEEEEES!’ we heard Franny wail from downstairs. ‘Time for some fizz!’
‘Fizz,’ I said. ‘That word is only ever used in a room of women who all secretly hate each other.’

Is Nina a bit too nice, a bit too accommodating? Perhaps. Either way, it was comforting to read a book that made me smile in places, and highlighted how brilliant female friendships can be.

3/5 A relaxing read.

I received my copy of Ghosts from the publisher, Penguin UK, via NetGalley, in exchange for an honest review.

Being the avid Dolly Alderton admirer that I am, I was ecstatic when Penguin gave me this review ecopy and it didn’t disappoint. Though quite lighthearted this book explores the myriad forms of loss and how these sensitive emotions feast on the nostalgia of what once was.

Nina is 32 and one of few single friends in her friendship group. Deciding to get back on to the dating scene, she signs up to a dating app, where she matches with a guy called Max. After some successful dates, he suddenly “ghosts” her - leaving her utterly confused. Amidst all this she grapples with her dad’s decline due to dementia and her changing relationships with her friends.

Dolly has this marvellous way of bringing her characters to life. While I think you can tell this is her first foray into fiction in the first few chapters, once she gets into the swing of things, boy does she work magic. Each character is so distinct and believable that I could tell who was talking just from dialogue - I could almost hear them. Which is the mark of a true craftsman. I will note, however, that the cast (from what I could tell) wasn’t majorly diverse and some were a teensy bit cliché, but ones you’ve likely encountered in day to day life.

I think the discussion of memory and it’s role in maintaining and creating relationships is an evocative one. Indeed, as she witnesses her brilliant Dad begin to forget the things that made him him and, worse, the precious moments he shared with Nina, it is a compelling and sensitively realised depiction of how much we rely on shared memory for connectivity.

Though Nina is in her thirties many of the things she experiences are relatable at any age. I found dolly’s writing very observant. Particularly, those emotions of feeling out of sync with her peers and that weird grief that’s felt at the demise of an almost future. Indeed, ghosting is HORRID and she explores those feelings of dejection perfectly. The discussion of motherhood and female choices is also an interesting undercurrent e.g the frazzled mum believing everyone else is having fun and thus seeks validation in other mothers. I felt this book was very similar in tone to Olive by Emma Gannon, so, if you liked this title - you'll love Ghosts.

Nina Dean is a food writer, successful in life, but unlucky in love. Ghosts tells the story of her venture into online dating, and the lives of the family and friends around her. I preferred the family element of the story, with Nina and her Mum dealing with the onset of dementia in Nina's Dad. I couldn't really relate to the dating side of the story, I am older than the characters in the book and have never had the experience of online dating. I'm sure the right audience would absolutely love this book. Even so, I thought this was an enjoyable read.
Thank you NetGalley for the free ebook review copy.
#netgalley #ghosts #dollyalderton

I really loved this. It's clever - light and funny but with a good heart and strong characters. Highly recommended.

Nina Dean starts her 32nd birthday in a good place as an established food writer, she has wonderful friends and family and she has not long bought her first home. Now she is ready to date. She meets Max on a dating app and he seems like the perfect guy for her, especially when he tells her he is going to marry her on the first date. Is this going to be the start of something magical for her so she can enjoy her thirties the way she hoped?
I don't know how to put into words what I feel about this book. It resonated with me a lot I think, because I turned 32 this year and have been questioning some things about my life; but I am in a completely different position to Nina.
Whilst she is a relatable character going through the online dating scene this isn't something I have had to do for a few years, Dolly has captured this very well. I also loved how we see all of Nina’s life from friendships that seem to be failing as they grow older which is something that I have found over the years. But my favourite part of the story was about her family that she seems to be losing, as her father who is vanishing in slow-motion into dementia, everything about this journey was portrayed so well.
I really enjoyed the book as a whole, but I would’ve liked to have seen more of her cooking and her working on her book more before her book event. As she is a food writer I would have expected to see more of that ingrained into the story, but it wasn't enough to put me off, it is just a small personal quibble.
I felt the story was especially strong in the area of the friendship dynamics. It was nice to see real friendships from every aspect of her life and some of those take a battering as they all grow up and start families, move away and work out what they want in life. As hard as it was to read it as I felt it hit home slightly, it was very well written and I could completely put myself in her shoes.
I appreciated how Dolly dealt with the Dementia of her father and the beginning of that journey. I was so frustrated with her mum for most of the story until she explains what she is going through and it is heartbreaking. I have had a few family members experience it and it is not easy for anyone involved. Whilst the story dealt with the act of ‘ghosting’ in relationships that so often happens in this day and age, there is also that connection of her fathers ghosts troubling him from his youth but also that she is getting ghosted by her father too as he slowly starts to forget who she is.
Overall it was a brilliant first novel full of love, trust and hopefulness and I am excited to see what else Dolly will bring us.
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for gifting me a copy in exchange for an honest review.
4/5

An observant, on point description of a 30-something year old woman, constantly being told she’s too intense, too needy, even crazy. Alderton describes bleakness of single women’s reality in the way she does best - with descriptive writing that for me, simply hit the nail on the head. She talks about feminism without unnecessarily pompous statements that aren’t desperate or dated; She talks about men and male superiority, lack of concern for how their action affect others. Amongst all of this, which already seems like a lot, Alderton illustrated the journey of understanding and coming to terms with having you parent facing a form of Dementia. She tenderly explores what it’s like to switch seats with your mother or father, to see their lives from the point of view of a human being, not undefeatable parent we remember them as from our childhood.

Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for this ARC.

I am the same age as the protagonist in this novel, which may have contributed to why I loved it so much. This book is the Bridget Jones of the technology generation, where dating apps appear to make connecting so easy but in reality can exacerbate the problems, particularly when it is so easy for people to disappear. Alderton captures exactly what it is like to date as a thirty-something woman in 2020, when the gender gap seems to have widened even further between women, whose biological clocks form a soundtrack to their lives, and men, whose choices seem to have expanded even further. Alderton goes even further by dealing with mortality, the pain of friendship maintenance, growing up and finding your place in the world. A must-read for any millennial, and anyone who seeks to understand us!

Ghosts is the story of Nina. Nina Dean has arrived at her early thirties as a successful food writer with loving friends and family, plus a new home and neighbourhood. When she meets Max, a beguiling romantic hero who tells her on date one that he’s going to marry her, it feels like it’s all going to plan.
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If you didn’t know already, this book is an exploration of modern dating and it also dips into relationships and how we deal with them. We both really liked the dating element. It was *painfully* accurate and suitably horrible to go through with Nina and though we were really rooting for Max, he really did seem too good to be true.
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The other champion of this story was Nina’s relationship with her father who has dementia. Nina and his relationship is full of tenderness and love, she is understanding of his needs as his disease take a hold of his mind. She makes him his favourite desserts and spends time with him and makes him feel supported.
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The biggest downfall for us were all of Nina’s other relationships. All of her friends felt like caricatures of ‘typical’ female personalities and Nina’s judgement of them, and them of her, felt overly harsh sometimes. As a reader, I find it hard to find books that accurately represent how I feel about my female friends and maybe that’s a me thing but I don’t think it is. I hate literature that pits women against each other in their personal and professional lives. It’s a very outdated view of female friendships
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Overall El and I have this a 3.5/5. The writing was good and it had some redeeming points but the relationships at the heart of this novel, really let it down for us.

I must confess, I have never read Everything I Know about Love.. However I do regularly listen to The High Low Podcast with Dolly Alderton and Pandora Sykes so was interested in this book as I enjoy their podcast! This book seems to follow a story that is becoming more common, of a woman in her early 30s who feels lost compared to her friends due to a lack of husband/family and while it is still refreshing to read part of me feels that this book didn't do our character Nina justice... Nina is 31 and as we follow her over the course of the year we see her highs and lows on the dating app Lynx online. Despite being a successful food writer and having her own flat in London she still feels something is missing, a man. After her breakup with her long term boyfriend a few years ago she now feels like she's ready to start dating again so seeks the help of her only single friend.
And so Nina learns about the new world of online dating and Ghosting...
As well we this aspect to the story we also follow Nina as she deals with the changing dynamics of friendships as they settle down and move out of the city and the troubles at home including her relationship with her mother and her fathers dementia.
There were parts of this story that I loved but also parts that I felt so frustrated with Nina. I also found it interesting that we rarely see her, a food writer, cooking or actually writing. I know it perhaps wouldn't be the most interesting parts but it made it seem unbelievable? Also THAT scene with her neighbour was just too much. If you know you know...

Anybody who knows me knows that Dolly’s “𝘌𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘐 𝘒𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘈𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦” is one of my all time most recommended reads, and by far my favourite Non-Fic book, so naturally, I was VERY excited for her first novel. Thankfully, it did not disappoint! A gorgeous book about time passing, modern dating, love, male fragility, family, loss and changing at different paces to your friends - a topic I deeply relate to at the moment.

My biggest compliment to this book is that it was so gripping that I managed to keep my eyes open long enough to read it when awake feeding Jasper at 3am. Dolly Alderton’s writing is endlessly relatable, making her feel like something of an old friend. Her topics always resonate and her way with words never fails to make me laugh, often in spite of myself. I cannot wait to see what she writes next, as whatever it is, I am sure it will be brilliant.

Thank you Net Galley and Penguin UK for the advance copy of this book.

This was an ok book, not great, not bad.
The main character was alright but she seemed to be very judgy of everyone and their relationships and seemed to be a bit bitter that she didn't have what everyone else did along with her best friend Lola.
Ghosting has become a part of many people's lives now with the help of the millions of dating apps out there and in that respect this book was very relatable in the relationship aspect but the book just seemed very anti men with how they treated the women throughout the book, even the married ones were portrayed badly.
Nina was also going through a lot with her father becoming more and more ill with dementia throughout the story and these parts of the book were much more real showing how her an her mum were dealing with it but I just didn't really like the relationship aspect of the story.
It was a quick read and there were some parts that were good, I just didn't fully connect to the characters and the story.

Loved it!
this was one of my highly anticipated reads and it only took me the prologue to read before I was hooked.
I guess it would be classed as chick lit but its so much more than a silly rom com, it will make you laugh, leave your frustrated , question modern day life , Dolly knows how to draw you in.
I cant wait for more fiction from Dolly and maybe a sequel to this!?

Absolutely loved this, a really realistic, engaging and interesting character that you could really relate to, I’ve read her memoir which was really insightful and honest and had high expectations for her fictional venture. Her heroine’s highs and lows navigating online dating apps, changing friendships in your thirties and the trauma of slowly losing a beloved parent to dementia never feel cliched or hackneyed and really ring true. And there is an excruciating and painfully spot on description of a hen do that was so perfectly pitched and full of passive aggressive smug marrieds I felt like I was there! (I have been there to be fair....!) She really offers a fresh take on the well worn trope of the single girl about town desperately searching for Mr Right.

The only vague bum note was the resolution of the conflict with her terrible neighbour Angelo which resulted in them having furious and cathartic sex and then sort of agreeing to stop their quarrel which just felt very off kilter? But to be fair I could just have little insight as to how the stresses and strains of living in close quarters affects people!

A great read and I look forward to more of her fiction (or anything really...)

Food writer Nina Dean starts online dating at the age of 32, when her former boyfriend Joe gets engaged. On one of her first dates, she meets Max, who seems perfect. He even says he wants to marry her. But when Max suddenly disappears, cutting off all contact, Nina learns about ‘ghosting’ the hard way.

I enjoyed ‘Ghosts’ a lot. Nina is a believable character, and one who you want to support. Her friendship with Lola, and the observations and actions over downstairs neighbour Angelo, whilst rather drastic, add a lovely touch of humour to the book. I found the ending uplifting without going over the top (not wanting to give the plot away, but it’s not as saccharine as romance novels).

An enjoyable tale to keep you entertained in the cold winter nights.

This book really captures what being a single woman in the 21st Century is really like. Especially when your coming up to a certain age and you realise that your body clock is ticking. That all your friends are married or getting married as well as having children. Making you wonder if you’ll find your own Mr Wright. It made me laugh and at times it made me feel sad as it also portrays what real life is like as we get older. With ageing parent and the responsibilities that we have. However it’s not written in a negative way if that’s what you may be wondering.

Meet Nina George Dean a successful food author, with one book published and her second book nearing completion for being released. Along with the outlines of a third book. Not to mention the food column in a well known publication.

Most people would think she had it all, but Nina felt as though she had one ingredient missing in her life. That special someone who she can share everything with. With the help of one of her friends she signs up to a dating app. But dating isn’t as easy as you think these days.

Nina meets Max on the dating app and he seems to be only one that’s not ghosting her. So they arrange to meet at a local pub. Just as Nina is about to give up on Max as a no show, she finds him outside smoking. He says that hes been there all along waiting for her. Even though unimpressed by this she thinks she should at least give him a chance.

After that first date they end up spending most of their time together and appear to be in a proper relationship. Until one night when they are out Max professes his love to Nina and says that one day he will marry her. That’s when everything seems to go wrong. Max ghosts Nina, he doesn’t turn up when he is supposed to and doesn’t answer or reply to any of her messages.

All the while Nina is struggling with her fathers illness, as he has Alzheimer’s which is turning him in to a ghost of the man he was. Things are also strained with her best friend Katherine, who it turns out to be pregnant again.

She also has to attend the hen party from hell. Even though she and her ex Joe broke up ages ago they are still best friends and because he wants her at the wedding she has to attend Lucy’s hen party weekend.

So what else will happen in the year we share with Nina George Dean?

This is a must read, as I’ve already said its funny and spot on with living in the 21st Century.

Couldn’t stop reading this. Enjoyed it so much more than I thought I was going to. Great characterisation and some lovely depth. Brilliant depiction of being ghosted and the heartbreak is beautifully observed. Also thought the dementia storyline was deftly and sensitively handled. I look forward to this author’s next work.

Thank you to netgalley.co.uk for giving me a copy of this book in exchange for a fair and honest review.

I am honestly not sure what to think of this book, I just wasn't interested. I had actually begun it at the end of October and put it down. The storyline and characters just couldn't seem to hold my interest. When I picked it up again to try and finish, I found I could not remember much of the story at all.
Unfortunately, not for me.

Sadly this book is just not for me, I’m not the correct target audience clearly. I’m not a thirty something singleton, living in London, hung up on finding a life partner whilst my biological clock ticks inexorably onwards.
The main character Nina is a bit of a smug, patronising, dislikable character, and I’m not surprised she was ‘ ghosted’ as she comes across as shallow and superficial.
Characterisation is sadly lacking in this novel, apart from the stereotypical navel- gazing that seems to be the standard for such books about thirty-something singletons in London.
My thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for my advance copy of this title.

This is a book of emotions, making you laugh out loud, fall in love, cry with heartbreak and sympathy and anger at how all unfair life can be.
Nina Dean is how I think most women are getting through their 30s, maybe with a little more self confidence.
The author tells you of Nina’s life and manages to capture the funny side without being over the top and melodramatic. It is an ordinary story but one you won’t be able to put down it has been written so well and the characters are fully formed and easy to picture and empathise (or hate) with.

Ghosts

Something about this book & it’s blurb really grabbed me. It’s the story of Nina George Dean - named according to family legend after a certain Wham frontman. Nina is in her early 30s, a successful food writer, with lots of friends & her own flat in London. What Nina doesn’t have is a man - apart from the nightmare neighbour below her that is. Nina joins a dating site to dabble in the world of 21st century romance - her best friend Lola is a pro at online dating (to be honest all kinds of dating) and is on hand to help her navigate the minefield.
This book was so good! The characters felt fresh & different, they weren’t sugar sweet and fluffy - they were honest and real. I stayed up ridiculously late to find out how Nina’s story ends and I wasn’t disappointed. So well written, brilliantly descriptive & it made me very glad to have never tried online dating. Highly recommend.
Thanks to @netgalley and Fig tree for my copy of this book.