***I received a free copy of this ebook from the publisher via NetGalley. My words are completely my own, as always.***

I enjoy conversations where the other participants are willing to walk that generous line of being vulnerable and respectful. It feels somehow safe and real. Reading this book was just such an experience. I’m not sure what I expected but I enjoyed the journey—agreeing, disagreeing, listening, and wanting to share my answers to her open-the-conversation questions.

There were some stories that were trigger points for my own anxiety, so I skipped past those.

Some favorite excerpts:
“These things are facts about me, the same as telling you where I went to college or my eye color...anxiety was just a part of my personality. It wasn’t embarrassing. It wasn’t something to be treated, either. It just was.” (Chapter 1. Who Are You?)

“The stories we tell ourselves and others are not always the whole truth. Certain stories . . . grow so ingrained in our psyches and in our personal narratives that we can’t even see that they’re not completely true, that they’re not objective.” (Chapter 4. What Were Your Pivotal Decisions?)

“Book club taught us not to assume anything about what another person believes or feels.” (Chapter 6. When Did You Belong?)

“I believe that we’re only here for a short time, even when the days feel like they drag on forever, even when one year age is us like it was ten. I believe that this brevity should make us pay attention and dig deeper. Can we do this while holding all of life lately at the same time? I believe we can.” (Chapter 10. What Do You Believe?)

I thought I could be a biased reviewer of Laura’s book. I can not. I’ve known Laura since she was young. I had the town’s babysitting business (I was a huge fan of the Babysitter’s Club). I’m happy for her. I loved the memoir. She’s already proved that we love 10 Things. Now she gives us questions to ask and provides her own answers for the memoir portion. As someone who avoids small talk at all costs, Laura has given me ideas to strike up more meaningful conversations. Laura is a lovely human. She always has been.

When we have problems, there's something so healing about knowing that we are not alone in our suffering. That's the real gift of this book. Laura Tremaine shares so many stories and truly forms a community among her readers. This book is truly a comfort that is meant to be shared.

This was a super fun book.

I hadn't heard of Laura prior to a friend telling me I needed to read this one.

I always trust that friend. So I read/listened to this book.

Little did I know the author and I are both from Oklahoma so that was fun to get a story that was very similar to my upbringing. Her stories on faith were great! I liked how she sought out her faith and then through her many experiences made her faith fit to how it could best help her.

Now I am off to apply some of these tips!

Thank you Zondervan and Netgalley for an advanced copy for my sassy review.

I picked this book up on a whim and devoured it. This is a mix of not only reflection but how that reflection has molded Laura into who she is today. Every chapter starts with a question to not only ask yourself, but to use as a conversation starter to build deeper, more meaningful relationships. She challenged me to slow down and be more intentional about looking back before running to what’s next.

This book is for anyone who is looking for a springboard to having more life giving conversations with the people they love and do life with.

Over one year into the pandemic, we are in a time when we are all yearning to connect with our friends face-to-face. I don’t agree with the author’s assertion there is shaming for oversharing on social media. I think there is way too much oversharing and it’s usually encouraged, but I am all for connecting with friends on a deep level. I think that in an age of social media, many people long to connect in a personal way. I, for one, dislike cocktail party (remember those? Yeah, I don't miss them either) small talk, and enjoy small groups and one-on-one conversations on subjects that matter.

This book asks the questions, and urges readers to dig deep and be introspective. These sections would be an excellent springboard for journaling, if that’s your thing (it’s not mine). And then we have the ‘I’ll Go First’ part of the title. I found this book to be mostly memoir, not my favorite genre. While the author is no doubt a delightful relatable person I don’t think her life warrants a memoir quite yet.

So, a mixed bag for me.

What if you had a friend whose vulnerability paved the way for you to be fully yourself whenever you were together? If you are tired of surface level coffee dates and image management as a way of life, Share Your Stuff. I’ll Go First. will land on your heart like a breath of fresh air. Laura Tremaine shares ten questions guaranteed to take your friendships to the next level, but she does it in the context of her own messy story.


One unexpected benefit of this reading experience is that I couldn’t help but swivel the beam of those ten penetrating questions onto myself, and the beginning of a new year isn’t a bad time to be reviewing my pivotal decisions, pondering the people who have “taught me to be,” or what still scares me, even at age 58. I reached the final page wanting to be a better listener, to be the kind of friend who encourages others to be themselves and to know that they have been heard. Whether you implement Laura’s list of ten questions or come up with some doozies of your own, I hope you will lean into relationships in 2021, reaching across the space that separates mask from mask by posing a question, going first, and then really listening as your friend shares her heart.

I loved this book with all of my heart! Like many, I have followed Laura Tremaine for years, hoping for the DAY she would write a book, which we all knew would happen at the right time. 😍 Let me tell you, it was worth the wait x100000. She is such a fantastic storyteller. Each chapter is filled with her deeply honest and endlessly entertaining personal stories, framed with a compelling, self-reflective topic—Who Are You? What Are You Afraid Of? What Broke You?—and great questions at the end. I read the ARC on my Kindle but look forward to doing some serious journaling + highlighting inside my hardcopy. She makes me want to dig, read, write, share, connect. Reminds me that no matter our scars and differences, we’re all more alike than we realize. She’s so gifted at what she does in this world! Five shining stars!

An easy read that’s part guide, part story. Laura gives questions to ask that will help deepen your relationships with meaningful conversations.

As described, Share Your Stuff, I’ll Go First is “part memoir and part guidebook,” written with the intent of deepening relationships with others by sharing yourself. To do this, the author posed ten questions to provoke thought and discussion with family or friends.

Each section followed the same format which seemed to work well for the topic. The author went first and wrote about her life and experiences as well as her perspectives related to the focus question. Her style was personal and conversational and was much like a memoir or journal. She then posed a variety of questions to help the reader frame their thoughts with the idea it would be a basis for conversations and sharing with others.

I thought there was a much greater emphasis on the author’s story than on cultivating connections. The transfer between the two just didn’t work for me. Perhaps I had different expectations of the book and/or I am in a different place or stage in my life than the intended audience for this book.



FYI - I received a copy of this book through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Share Your Stuff, I'll Go First by Laura Tremaine is a self-help book/memoir that encourages the reader to better understand herself. Tremaine asks many questions to help open a dialogue, and she answers these questions with her own life stories. I especially appreciated the chapter entitled "What Broke You?" Tremaine says, "There's an attitude I've watched go down online and in person for a long time where people diminish their own brokenness in deference to another person's (worse) brokenness. It comes from a good place, a polite and thoughtful place. But the result is millions of people stuffing their cracks with coping mechanisms instead of experiencing true healing." I enjoyed this book and would recommend it to everyone because we could all use some thoughtful introspection. Thanks to NetGalley for the free digital review copy. All opinions are my own.

I enjoyed this so much. The way Laura was telling us her experiences really made me think yes I can relate to that. The questions she asks actually feels like shes personally asking you. It's really opened up my experiences

Laura Tremaine has written a thought provoking book that asks us to reflect on 10 questions with the hope that we will take some or all to our friends, family, partners etc and build connections or strengthen existing ones through meaningful conversations.

Her writing is bold, genuine, heartfelt and engaging- the conversational tone she created felt as if I was chatting with her over a glass of wine. As an introvert and analyzer of all things, I love listening to others share their thoughts and experiences but this isn’t something I regularly do. And other than books and my pets I don’t share much online at all. This book has made me reflect on that. I’m grateful to Laura for encouraging me to answer the 10 questions and for going first of course:

I’m a long-time fan of Laura Tremaine and her work, so I had very high expectations for this book. since its release last week, I’ve savored each chapter of the book and absolutely loved it! in a sort of memoir-conversational guide hybrid, Laura asks ten questions that she then answers herself in essay form. I found her answers, which include stories from throughout her whole life, to be so interesting! her stories were engaging, even gripping at times, and I also really appreciated the way she could speak to the impact these moments and decisions have had on her life, how they’ve shaped her and informed who she is today. aside from her own personal stories, all of the questions are ones I’m eager to journal about for myself, and I also can’t wait to talk about them with my friends and family. Laura has such a gift for guiding others to make deeper, more meaningful connections through conversations. this is a book I know I will continue to pull out, think over, and process through, and it would be an excellent book club selection! also of note is that I both cried and laughed while reading this, which is the ultimate compliment, in my mind. 5/5⭐️—I loved it!

I thoroughly enjoyed this book from start to finish. The author is an Oklahoma-turned-Californian like me and we both attended the same university, so much of what she writes about I really related to and connected on a personal level even though we’ve never met. The premise of the book is about sharing our stories with others to deepen our relationships. I love the stories she shares and was prompted to share my own stuff in a journal after each chapter. Even if I never shared my “stuff” with anyone else, the journaling I did alongside of this book was so helpful and eye-opening. I would recommend this to anyone wanting to know themselves better.

Given the topic of fostering deeper friendship connections, as well as some early reviews, I was very optimistic about this book. Laura Tremaine is a self professed “mommy blogger” and I appreciate her intentions and motivations to cultivate connection in what is an increasing ‘disconnected’ world. I do think her chapter titles are good and her suggested questions pertaining to areas of connection in friendship are of value. . However, overall it seemed I was reading someone’s journal. It seemed more of a string of connected blog posts versus a thoughtful exploration of building, cultivating and maintaining lifegiving friendships. This book just really did not work for me. I am grateful to net galley for a complimentary copy to read and provide an honest review of this book.

Share Your Stuff. I'll Go First.: 10 Questions to Take Your Friendships to the Next Level by Laura Tremaine
Publisher: Zondervan
Genre: Self-Help
Release Date: February 2, 2021

Share Your Stuff. I'll Go First.: 10 Questions to Take Your Friendships to the Next Level by Laura Tremaine is a book about connection, communication, and trust.

I had never heard of the author before (I was never a blog reader and podcasts are still listened to in small quantities), but there was something about this book that made me want to read it and I am so glad I did.
This book is part memoir and part guide to enrich your friendships through real connections and vulnerability. You can read this book straight through or pick the chapter you think will serve you best in this moment. This is one of those books where you feel like you are sitting down with a friend and having a real moment over a cup of coffee.

I look forward to reading this book again!

I'm so grateful to Laura Tremaine, Zondervan, and NetGalley for providing me with a free copy of this ARC ebook in exchange for my honest review.

I have loved Laura Tremaine for many years as she has found her way into our lives through podcasting and social media. "Share Your Stuff. I'll Go First." is such a "Laura" gift to put out into the world. Honest, funny, and a tool for connection to ourselves and others. So grateful this book has made it's way into the world!

If you haven't heard of the10 Things to Tell You podcast or @laura.tremaine, you are absolutely missing out. Laura has talked for years about how to share your thoughts and stories in a way that builds connection with others. Her voice is addictive and I've thought so much about SO many interesting things due to her prompts, blog posts, podcast episodes, and now through her just-released book SHARE YOUR STUFF. I'LL GO FIRST.

I received an early copy of this exceptional book from the publisher via Netgalley (thank you, @zondervan), but I also got the audiobook from @audible because I love listening to Laura read to me. LOL. In this book, she shares a lot of personal moments that have shaped who she is and how she thinks about things. She really probes some important questions and shares how you can think deeper about parts of your past and your experiences that shape who you are and allow you to connect with others on a deeper level. Guys, this is a perfect book for our current times because these connections that we have with others are strained by physical distance and lockdown measures. I'm sure we are all feeling a bit of distance even from those we know very well.

I absolutely loved this book and am delighted to be working through the companion journal and the Facebook group chat with Laura herself. These were preorder bonuses and they've been extended to the end of this week so I highly recommend checking them out if you plan to buy the book!! If you're on the fence about whether a book like this is for you, I'd recommend dipping your toes in the @10ThingsToTellYou podcast a bit. I am personally (and doubly because of my psychology background) an advocate for truly getting to know people, chatting, and digging deeper but I really think almost anyone could benefit from Laura's book. PS: You should also go check out Laura's Instagram celebrated her book release during the pandemic yesterday because her celebrations made me tear up!

Laura Tremaine's ability to weave stories together is so engaging, I couldn't put this book down. I'm not a journal-er by nature, but this book makes me want to crack open a notebook and start writing. I want to write as a way to process, to remember, and to learn about myself. I'm planning on starting back at the beginning of this book, and working my way through it again, more slowly. This time, maybe I'll drag a friend or two along with me! I can't say enough about Laura Tremaine's debut book, and I'll be waiting with bated breath for the next one!