This book wasn’t my forte, but it was still a good read. I usually go for something with more action and suspense, but obviously this was not of that sort of genre. It was, however, very insightful and interesting to read. I liked its fresh perspective on mental illness as seen through the way it impacts the family and loved ones, rather than the individual themselves. There were quite a few cliches in this novel though, which could have been avoided. Things such as the gay best friend and writing songs for each other just felt a bit fake. The romance was also a bit too good to be true, but then again, we don’t read books for the things that can happen in real life. Rating: 2.5 stars

This is bittersweet. You smile. You cry. You sigh. You sniff. You wipe your tears more. Then eventually you nod and accept. I feel my heart hurts but it is still filled with so much hope after I finished my reading.

Such a bittersweet, thought provoking, moving story about mental illness, coping mechanism of young adults and their dysfunctional family relationships, finding their way to adulthood by doing more mistakes.

Sydney Holman thinks she can convince her overprotective mom to accept her grandparents’ grandiose birthday gift ( which is additional 30K check and they already paid entire school tuition and housing expanses. I wish they could adopt me, too, if I would be nicer and stop drinking. Nope, I think, it wouldn’t work for both of the parties! ) and her decision to go to NYU! At least she didn’t change her major but her mother is still upset to get financial aid from her parents in law.

Sydney is abandoned by her drug addict and alcoholic father when she was little girl and when she deals with depression and her mood is getting darker, she talks with her father as her imaginary friend. She keeps this situation as a secret.

But when she decides to spend some time at her grandparents’ beach house, bumping into her sudden crush Grayson Armstrong, who is charming, sweet, gifted musician, coming from wealthy family, is also taken by gorgeous girl, she thinks at least they can be friends and she can spend some quality time by knowing more about her own family.

But she learns more than she can absorb: the reason behind her father’s abandonment is a psychological illness: he is schizophrenic, homeless, living in NYC streets which means there’s %10 chance she may be inherited the illness.

Sydney feels lost, needing to find answers about her father by looking for him at the streets of NY with the help of her best friend Elliott. She also deals with the hearth ache after she starts to fall for Grayson and she feels like she is not good enough for him because of unknown things about her own mental condition.

But finding her dad may not be the exact solutions of her problems because firstly she has to discover who she is , what she is afraid of, what her dreams and expectations about her own future are.

It’s well written novel with realistic approach to the illness. I loved the characters. Especially Elliott is my favorite!

Grayson was sweet pie. I wish he may stand up for himself but living in a dysfunctional family and a bully, abusive father who has real anger issues made him more hesitant, people pleaser to balance the toxic energy in their home which I actually resonate with.
And I loved Sydney: her bravery, her confusion, her quirkiness, her genuine and straightforward style. Her mother raised her as a fighter and overachiever so she has enough confidence and she deals with her insecurities better than most teenagers do.

I’m giving four heartwarming, hopeful, musical, sweet stars!

I also enjoyed the previous book of the author and I’m looking forward to read more works of her.

Special thanks to NetGalley and Soho Press/ Soho Teen for sharing this digital reviewer copy with me in exchange my honest opinions.

Loved this book!
I don't think I have read a book ad good as this one.
This one really did open my mind on a whole other level!
Grab this one..... Its amazing!

Thanks NetGalley publisher and author!