This was a really interesting explorative book that gives lots of insight into death from a pagan perspective. In this book readers will learn about death as a spiritual process, and come to understand how it fits into the cycle of life. There are rituals, meditations, advice and more that give readers a better understanding of death, coping methods to help come to terms, and more. Funerals, remembrances, and meditations for mourning and letting go are included in this book, as well as tips for advanced planning, wills, and power of attorney.

Each chapter shares the beliefs and specific rituals of a distinct tradition, including British Traditional Wicca, Dis-cordianism, Eclectic Wicca, Heathenry, Hellenism, Druidry, Thelema, and more.

Really enjoyed this perspective on death and the event of funerals. Gives a lot of different aspects to death thatI think can bring some peopl,e more comfort than the normal process

Do I Have to Wear Black? Rituals, Customs & Funerary Etiquette for Modern Pagans by Mortellus is a great resource for anyone like myself who is always eager to learn as much as possible in an effort to help those left behind when a loved one passes. Although I look at death and dying differently than many in my circle, I cant help but want to assist them in getting through their grief in healthy ways.

As a nurse, I feel that my profession has a responsibility to make the death and dying process less frightening especially for those experiencing a family member transition from this life. Although there are certain rituals listed that I can not see myself comfortable with, there are many that I found useful enough for my "toolbox" .and like any other book, I'll take what resonates with me, my faith and my practice and leave the rest behind.

Many thanks to Netgalley and Llewellyn Publications for this ARC. All opinions stated are authentically my own.

I found this really interesting. It focuses around death in different Pagan communities. I don't think I've seen another book that deals with death, funerary rituals, and honoring the dead from a Pagan perspective.

I loved loved the sections answering what to say, or not say, to those that are grieving. I really appreciated the different customs covered and that the author consulted leaders and practitioners to get the best information.

This is a fantastic resource for anyone who is Pagan or has lost someone who is.

'Do I Have to Wear Black?' is a fascinating insight into an aspect of magic and the witchcraft community that I am so unfamiliar with. I was solidly raised within Christianity and although there was a lot of attention towards other cultures and religions, when it came to Death we mostly stuck to the known. I was so interested to read what Mortellus had written about her own experiences and all the different approaches one can take towards death and what comes after.
While I'm not scared of dying, I found it very soothing still to read this book. To have someone so gently and carefully walk you through its different aspects and how you can infuse all of it with magic was very rewarding. Death is just the end of one way of being and through her stories, Mortellus is able to show the reader just how much exists after death.

Online on Goodreads

[I received a free ebook copy of this book from NetGalley in exchange for my honest reviews]

This book is AMAZING. I've followed Mortellus work for a bit on social media and I was really excited about reading this book. I started reading at around the same time I discovered Ask a Mortician's channel on Youtube so it was a great tool in helping me change my mindset regarding death and funerals. This book is a MUST for any Priest or Priestess who serves their community in any way, shape or form because Death is bound to happen and it is our duty to support our communities through these times.

This book includes fantastic chapters dedicated to several paths within the Pagan Community such as Wicca, Druidism, Heathenism, Helennism, Thelema, among others that are SO helpful in helping us deal and serve our communities. The author took care to consult with people from those communities and used official or created rituals from those traditions in other to make sure that the book was as complete and amazing as possible.

I think this book is a must and I will always highly recommend it!
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Note: The links associated with this review are from my Goodreads and my Blog. My Blog post will be scheduled for publication on the 6th of May 2021 and will be in Portuguese. For any additional questions, feel free to contact me!

This book focuses on the death and funerary rituals of several Pagan beliefs. Because of that, I will want to provide some trigger warnings for potential readers right off the bat. Content Warnings include: frank discussion of death and dying, discussion of embalming techniques, discussion of suicide, discussion of assisted suicide, suicidal ideation, discussion of abortion, discussion of miscarriage, discussion of stillbirth, discussion of infant death, discussion of child death, discussion of pet death, discussion of terminal illness, discussion of discrimination and prejudice toward Pagans, and pretty much every single death related trigger you might have.

That being addressed, this book has been sorely needed years and I wish it had been published long ago. As 2020 and 2021 have made clear, western society -- and in particular American society -- is not as prepared to handle death and respectful disposal of the dead as we had previously thought. Additionally, if your faith falls outside of the five major world religions -- Christianity (including all variants), Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, and Hinduism -- that finding resources for how to respectfully pay tribute to the dead is made even more difficult. This book seeks to aid with that by providing resources and examples of several, primarily western, Pagan religions ways to honor the dead.

And I do need to make that last bit clear, this book mostly focuses on Western Pagan religions -- Wicca, Heathenism, Druidism, Hellenism, Eclectic Paganism, Discordianism, etc. So it is important to know that going it. The book is geared toward primarily two groups: the bereaved who know that their deceased loved one was Pagan and want to honor that but don't know where to start or what is appropriate and the Pagan themself -- because many Pagans in the U.S. and Europe are solitary practitioners mostly due to the stigma surrounding their religion.

Much like Caitlin Doughty and her Ask a Mortician series on YouTube, this book seeks to demystify the funerary and postmortem processes and provide information for respectfully dealing with the Pagan dead. I personally appreciated that each section went into what was considered acceptable to do with the body including if organ donation, embalming, or body donation would be allowed. I liked that there were sections that answered "what can I do to help those that are grieving?" including what to say, and more crucially, what not to say... Spoiler Alert: It's generally a good idea to stay away from the Christian platitudes of 'they're in a better place now' or anything like that -- it's a micro aggression.

The book is well laid out, and I was pleased that the author consulted practitioners/leaders of the religions they were writing about.

Frankly, this book needs to be in every library as a resource. Straight up. This is a book that is sorely needed.

Because of that, I give this.

Five Stars

I received an ARC of this book via NetGalley.

I found it interesting even if it's very far from my own culture. I grew up in Italy where there's a lot of rituals and traditions about death and mourning so I found the content of this book a bit too far.
It's interesting but not my cup of tea.
Many thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for this ARC, all opinions are mine

Explore the myriad of customs that have emerged around death and dying in the magical and Pagan communities. Filled with rituals, meditations, legal considerations, and deep insights into death as a spiritual process, this book can be used by magical practitioners or shared with non-Pagan professionals who support Pagans in their final transitions… From the Publisher

Do I Have To Wear Black: Rituals, Customs and Funerary Etiquette For Modern Pagans by Mortellus is a timely read that fills a gap that has existed for some time now. Modern American society, as a whole, shy away from death, making it a very sterile and one size fits all affair. The pagan community intuitively and by virtue of many of the traditional and ancient ways has stepped a little more deeply into how death can be honored as a natural and unavoidable process not to be feared and uniquely out-pictures for each individual in its own way. Separated into five (5) parts and twenty (20) chapters, this book assists in bridging that gap and navigating death in a way that is respectful of all concerned.

Part One: Views of Death and What Comes After provides the foundation for whatever disparity may occur between the beliefs and customs of parties involved.

Part Two: Mortuary 101 gives the reader a look behind the scenes of the business of death in the modern world. The author, Mortellus, uses her knowledge as a Mortician to engage us in the reality of funeral rites and what more could be done in honoring the dead. The reminder to make sure that your wishes are known before you die and the choices that an individual may have regarding their funeral are brought into focus reinforcing the thought that each life is unique as is each death.

Part Three: Customs and Funerary Rites takes the reader through some of the more prevalent types of paganism and the nuances and ways in which the dead are honored. I believe this serves a multitude of intentions in highlighting the specifics of rites and their meanings as well as the thread of commonality that is woven regardless of your practice. Some inclusions are: Kemetism, Hellenism, Druidry, Heathenry and others.

Part Four: No Two Deaths Are The Same really drives home the reminder that the one size fits all approach that is common in modern society is a disservice to the beloved dead. It may serve to quiet the discomfort of the survivors around issues of death and honors nothing more. Some of those more poignant inclusions are those rites for those transitions caused by suicide, death of a child or abortion. These, in particular are deaths that are not easily accepted and uncomfortable for many to come to terms with.

Part Five: Grief and Everything After brings the journey of death to its natural ending and offers ways of healing and mourning. Letting Go Poppet Ritual, Mourning Dream-Pillow, Painting with Cremains and Sending Messages to the Dead are some of the spell work and memorial creations offered.

Would I Recommend:

Do I Have To Wear Black: Rituals, Customs and Funerary Etiquette For Modern Pagans by Mortellus is an intimate journey into death and how we may better serve the lives that have passed on. I appreciate the knowledge that Mortellus is a mortician, and as such, has first-hand experience of the many ways in which death and grief are expressed and the individuals whose lives are touched in the process.

As a much needed resource, this title is filled with sample rites, memorials and suggestions for honoring the dead in a way that is fulfilling for all concerned and in keeping with their specific beliefs and wishes. From the perspective of the pagan community, we need to embrace our wishes and those of our loved ones, step up to let these be known in the more traditional settings and speak from an informed place. Do I Have To Wear Black: Rituals, Customs and Funerary Etiquette For Modern Pagans by Mortellus fills all of the check boxes!

Reviewed by Robin Fennelly of PaganPages.org
https://paganpages.org/emagazine/2021/02/01/book-review-do-i-have-to-wear-black-by-mortellus/

This is an interesting book on death culture. You know the difficult topic no one wants to talk about. I think this is an important book that everyone should read.

Thank you to the Publisher and Netgalley for the advanced e-reader copy. All opinions expressed are my own.

Trigger Warning: This book is discussing death and all of the hard topics that come with losing loved ones.

There are chapters around funerals, meditations for mourning, beliefs and rituals for different paths. A ton of information is included and it is very straightforward. These are difficult topics and I appreciated the tone of the book Everything was kept factual but not cruel. It also goes through funeral rites by culture. It was so detailed I really enjoyed reading the sections that weren't my path. I am looking forward to getting my own copy and reading it again.

In this book, Mortellus brings together a collection of customs that have emerged about death and dying in the magical and Pagan communities. The customs focused on in this book are British Traditional Wicca, Crypto-Paganism, Discordianism, Druidry, Eclectic Wicca, Heathenry, Hellenism, Kemetism, and Thelema. The book also includes stories and myths that teach lessons about death and the different kinds of afterlives from different faiths.

Part two of this book is where discussion of different burial practices comes into play. This is the section of the book that I really enjoyed, especially considering it included practices that I hadn’t heard of before like Promession. This section also discusses end of life plans, wills, and the importance of planning ahead, which is something I need to do.
I really enjoyed this book. It was very informative about each tradition's culture and rituals. They also included a couple of death rituals that pertain to these practices, which can easily be adapted to your situation. Also included in this book is discussion about animal deaths, unexpected deaths, and the loss of a child. These are very heartbreaking topics but Mortellus did a great job at approaching the topic and discussing what ritual options you can take.

The only issue I had in this book was in Chapter 6 Restorative Arts and Crafts. She discusses creating life casts and death masks to help with grieving. I have made a life cast of my husband so I know how the process works. Do not follow the instructions listed in this book for life casting because it is not safe. The instructions say to place straws in the nose so the person can believe but this is extremely dangerous. If you bump those straws it could cut the inside of the person's nose and cause a nosebleed, most likely causing the person to panic. The proper way to do a face mold is to carefully work around the nose placing straw strips between the nostrils. Leave the nose holes open!! After you take the life cast off the person, you close the holes with plaster or clay. Please look this process up online. There are a lot of videos with the proper way to make a face cast. So again please, do not follow the instructions listed in this book.

Other than the improper instruction for life casting, I enjoyed this book. It presented new information about rituals, practices, and beliefs in the Pagan community. A lot of these were group rituals though so if you are a solitary it might be harder to have someone do these rituals for your death, but a lot can easily be adjusted.

Trigger Warnings:
- Death
- Greif
- Child death
- Suicide and assisted suicide
- Animal death

This book explains in clear and concise language the duties of a witch for funerals and rituals dealing with death. It was very helpful to me. I thought it to be a great reference in my journey. I would definitely recommend it.

Do I have to wear black is an exploration of how witches approach death. Though obviously there's lots of variation, this book does it's best to examine myths about death, beliefs, as well as customs. I would absolutely recommend it.

Took my time reading his book, and enjoyed it thoroughly. It is a topic that not many people like to talk about but in my family we have always been candid about death and what happens next to all of us, including parents , sibling and out pets. This is a book that should be on all of our shelves for future reference. Thanks to NetGalley, the author and publishers for my copy.

When I first saw this book on the llewellyn website I thought "now theres gonna be a fascinating read" and I wasnt wrong.
Its and interesting overview of death culture and for those brave enough or even curious enough to dive in I feel this book is as good a place to start as any.

The authors writing style is both informative and candid which I enjoyed immensely.

Would highly reccomend.

Great book for those who looking at plans for when they die. A few ideas - not a whole guide - of what you could do. A few traditions brought in, nice to see that.