As a younger queer person, this memoir meant a lot to me. I can't imagine the pain and sorrow queer people living in the 1980s must have felt seeing so many of their friends die. It meant a lot that the author would share what must have been the hardest experiences of his life.

I had to persevere with this book at the beginning. The first section is all about Frost and his partner and their frankly opulent lives. Their great jobs, social lives, friends, privilege etc. There is nothing wrong with any of this, by the way, but I was confused because it didn't really tally with the title or description of the book. Having read it all, it actually works beautifully. You need to know what kind of life Frost and his partner J had in order to fully appreciate their losses that unfurl through the middle section of the book. All the beauty, all the friends, all the sanctuaries, gone, and the life that was left, although admittedly more easy than many people's, was increasingly tarnished and hollow. At one point the book reads like a roll call of the dead. It really is sobering to read. The final section is more redemptive when triple therapy comes along and with the restoration of J's health, the overwhelming need to give something back and help others. The epilogue where Frost explains his reasons for writing the book were also very illuminating and made me think of some of the passages in a clearer light. I think this is an important book in many ways.