I learned about the existence of this book a couple of months ago, looking for YA romance books on GOODREADS, and the story caught my attention as soon as I read the synopsis: a trans boy who fights against his ex to be Homecoming King... You'll not deny that the story looks absolutely great. And I assure you that it does not disappoint!

I briefly introduce you to the wonderful lead characters of the book: Jeremy and Lukas. Lukas and Jeremy. Almost half a life together, popular (I would even say that they the most popular couple in high school), envied and with a promising future ahead of them. But that was before. Before Jeremy had enough and decided to be himself and not some suffocating version of himself: the perfect daughter, girlfriend, cheerleader, friend. Before Jeremy decided that he didn't want to be invisible anymore, that he wanted to be seen, to be him and to be respected and loved. Before he decided to end things with Lukas, without explanation and on the same day as Lukas' brother's funeral. Before.

Now things have changed and Lukas and Jeremy hardly speak to each other. They only have a somewhat cordial relationship, but that also seems to end when the two decide to present themselves for the title of Homecoming King. Both for different but equally valid reasons:

Jeremy likes attention, even more so now that he needs the other students to see him for who he really is: he doesn't want his transition to define him and he wants - needs - to be seen and treated as just another boy. Also, it's his senior year and, therefore, his time to shine. And what better way to finish high school than to be crowned Homecoming King.

For Lukas, on the other hand, being the Homecoming King can make a difference in his future: the difference between going to a prestigious university and becoming the perfect son, or remaining the son who is not good enough for his parents...

So may the best man win!

However, the competition between the two soon turns into rivalry, where friendships break, relationships change, feelings evolve... Will Jeremy and Lukas be able to be friends... or something else again? Or will their relationship end forever? Thus, ZR Ellor tells us a wonderful story about second chances, friendship, love, trust and the importance of being yourself, of being happy. It will not be an easy road but it will be one that will be worth traveling.

The story is told in two voices, by Jeremy and Lukas, in a narrative that presents us with a countdown to the Homecoming dance and the election of the King. The fact that the chapters are narrated by different characters, on the one hand, makes the reading faster and, on the other, makes us get to know the two main leads much more thoroughly, as well as their pain, their fears, their anger... I think they are two unique characters that complement each other perfectly, in addition to how real they feel: they both make mistakes, they are selfish, they push others away... they also both feel lonely, not loved, not enough... I really liked the evolution that the two have, as well as the relationships that are created between them and the other characters, the community that they create little by little, the strength they have when they join forces...

Most of the time I go into books knowing almost nothing but I’m really glad that I decided to read a couple of reviews before diving into May the Best Man Win. The cover and even the synopsis promise a funny rom-com but if you scroll down and check out the trigger warnings, it quickly becomes clear that this won’t be the carefree high school love story you might expect.

Nevertheless, I did enjoy May the Best Man Win for the most part. Not every LGBTQIAP+ character always needs to be all rainbows and sunshine. We have two main characters who are both having a quite hard time and they don’t always make the best decisions as a result. Jeremy came out as transgender not too long ago and with bullies at school, being deadnamed and misgendered, his mom not always being supportive and his own doubts, the only thing he wants is to prove that he is a man while navigating what it means to truly be himself. He has a lot of built-up rage and a short temper and he’s quick to lash out. I didn’t mind that he was a bit of an unlikable/morally grey character at times and liked his character development even if it could’ve been a bit more fleshed out.

Lukas is autistic and we explore his sexuality throughout the book. His older brother Jason died in an car accident and a big part of his journey in the book is about stepping out of his brother’s shadow. Lukas and Jason had a difficult relationship with each other and while Lukas’ grief and the way his family struggled to get back to normal after this loss was addressed I do think it could’ve been a bigger part of the story. He is still hurt by the way Jeremy dumped him without an explanation and is still upset about the breakup while also putting a lot of pressure on himself. Both boys running for Homecoming King to prove themselves lead to pranks that get out of hand and quite some drama.

My favorite part of the book was definitely Sol who is a geeky non-binary side character. I loved seeing their relationship with both main characters and they added a lot to the story. I did also enjoy how Jeremy found a queer community at school where he felt welcome and people understood what he was going through especially in the way he could open up to Sol. Jeremy also faced transphobia from other LGBTQ+ side characters which I think needed to be addressed more in the end as well.

I had two main issues with May the Best Man Win. 1) I think too many different things were tried to be accomplished at the same time. Some things were never really resolved. The main characters do a lot of shitty things and other people do and say a lot of shitty things and I would’ve liked for both sides to face more consequences. I also would’ve liked Jeremy’s autism as well as many other themes to be a bigger part of the ending. A lot of important topics were addressed but they needed to be more fleshed out to really send a message. And 2) I wasn’t the biggest fan of the pacing. Both characters had to figure out some things on their own but so much could’ve been avoided if they had just talked to each other. The constant back-and-forth and pain that they caused each other went on for a bit too long in my opinion. The ending also felt a bit abrupt.

Overall, I think May the Best Man Win is an important story and I enjoyed parts of it but it did not quite meet my expectations.

I gave May the Best Man win 3.5 stars.

Don’t be fooled: this is not a lighthearted rom-com. Yes, a main thread in May the Best Man Win is the characters’ romantic relationships, but the novel follows Jeremy Harkiss and Lukas Rivers, who are both often angry, vindictive, and self-destructive, and encompasses much heavier themes. 

Let’s start with Jeremy...Jeremy. At first, it was easy to feel sympathetic for him as he faced misgendering and other transphobic acts from classmates and adults alike, all for publicly transitioning. As the book progressed, however, I found myself liking him less and less. I think it actually speaks to Z.R. Ellor’s skill that he could craft a strong downward arc, but it was hard for me to stay invested in the plot when I constantly wanted to lecture Jeremy—and Lukas, for that matter. That said, I couldn’t stop reading—like some sort of awful, alluring train wreck. 

I think my main issue was with the neglect of Jeremy and Lukas’s past and side relationships. Prior to Jeremy’s transition, Jeremy and Lukas were a couple for nearly three years, but the reader hardly sees any of those positive moments. In the present, there are still numerous unsaid feelings between the two of them, so I would have liked to delve further into how their relationship changed. I felt similarly about Jeremy and Naomi Guo; Naomi is Jeremy’s best friend, but they experience a falling-out pretty early on in the novel, so Naomi quickly feels cast aside as a character. Sol, another friend of both main characters, is so interesting—they’re a Latinx nonbinary hacker, not to mention how supportive they are even when Jeremy and Lukas treat them terribly—so I wish they had been in the spotlight more often. 

Other personal threads also felt a bit underdeveloped. Lukas has a very complicated relationship with Jason, his late older brother, but the reader doesn’t receive much insight into Jason other than his cruel ableism toward Lukas. Lukas is also briefly involved in a sexual situation with one of Jason’s former friends, which was off-putting to me, and there wasn’t much of a resolution afterward about the problematic aspects. 

That said, I loved the writing itself. Despite their flaws, the characters were all so raw and vulnerable, and I could relate to so many of their internalized anxieties. I also appreciated that Lukas and Jeremy were both popular figures in their high school; I think it’s important to have representation for characters who struggle with mental health and sexuality but aren’t relegated to typical nerdy, “quirky” characters.

I had quite a few problems with this book to be honest. The two main characters were really unlikable and just straight up cruel to each other, which is why I absolutely wasn't invested in them ending up together. I just felt like they weren't good for each other and slightly toxic even.

While reading, I quickly discovered Jeremy is rude. Yes, the guy is going through a lot but he literally treats his friends like trash AND is egocentric. I was still hopeful though, but the book quickly began feeling like a drag.

Then the most infuriating thing ever happened, and I was so done. Showing pictures of someone before transitioning to the entire school? Sorry, but there's no way you just forget how wrong that is. And then I get that Jeremy is going through the worst thing, but THREATENING to reveal Lukas has autism when he's not ready for it???

Another no-go. To make it worse, there barely was any character development

Overall I also thought the autism rep was very underdeveloped...as an autistic person myself I of course liked that Lukas was more than his autism, but it was rarely mentioned except if it was needed to further the plot or explain some of his actions. It also just wasn't really woven into the story well and especially not closed off enough.

I absolutely didn't enjoy reading this, even though it had a lot of potential to become a favourite. Expected a lot more...

The cover and the synopsis of this book instantly pulled me in. I remember seeing the cover reveal of this book a few months ago and instantly added it to my T0-Reads! I was very happy when I received an ARC for this book. I went in expecting a cute-adorable-angsty rom-com, but it turned out to be something entirely different.

My first problem with this book was that this is very mismarketed and that is something I do not appreciate at all not only because I am a reader but also because I am a communications student! This book is ANYTHING BUT A ROM-COM.

Okay... So, Listen! I wanted to LOVE this book. It has exactly what I’m looking for in a Queer YA Romance. There was a Trans MC, a Questioning Autistic MC, a gaggle of other Queer characters, an annoying HS jock Antagonist, all set in a High School during the preparation for their Homecoming Dance.

Why I didn’t connect as fully... I know that I was not a big fan of the irredeemable qualities of Jeremy, the trans MC. I know that while going through transition and taking hormones can sometimes make your moods fluctuate, but he was just an asshole. He said a lot of BS to make excuses, hurt his friends, threw a milkshake in his exes face while breaking up with him on the day of his brother’s funeral... and by the end, he had sort of tried to set the wrongs he did, right, but I’m still angry at him for all the past BS.

I did love Lukas. He was Autistic, but didn’t want anyone to know, because he didn’t want special treatment. He was going through a lot from the death of his Brother, so his trauma was apparent. The way that the author wrote him, I felt truly sorry for him. I excused the wrongs he did, because he was so obviously in love with Jeremy the whole time.

Overall, I liked it, but didn’t love it.

E-ARC generously provided by Macmillan Children's Publishing Group through Netgalley in an exchange for an honest review. Thank you so much!

Trigger Warnings for: transphobia, grief, homophobia, ableism

5 stars. Don’t let the cover fool you: May the Best Man Win is a complicated and masterfully written queer YA masterpiece that contains just as much bite as it does romance. As a seasoned reader of YA starring teens of the LGBTQ+ community, upon seeing the cover of this book I thought I knew exactly what this story was going to be: another decently written, cute romance between two boys going from rivals to lovers with an equally adorable, illustrated pastel cover. I was completely wrong. This book did contain a swoonworthy m|m romance, but it is a story that is about so much more. Z.R. Ellor has written a multilayered narrative examining academic pressure, toxic masculinity, privilege, and the ways in which institutions of power uphold those with it at the expense of marginalized communities. Above all, he has written a story that centers queer teens and gives them the space to be messy and at times, downright unlikable.

Let’s start with prose and character voice: Ellor’s effective marriage of compulsively readable prose and distinct character narration makes this book a triumph. As I’ve said many a time in reviews about YA contemporary novels, what truly makes or breaks them (doubly so for those told in first person narrative) is if the narrative is permeated by the unique voice of the narrator. What truly impressed me about this novel is that both protagonists, Jeremy Harkiss and Lukas Rivers, not only have their own perspectives but also have such vividly drawn character voices. Despite the narrative switching back and forth between their perspectives, I had no problem identifying which of their perspectives I was reading from; this is a testament to the great care and skill with which Ellor crafted each of his main character’s voices. As a result of this, it was incredibly easy for me to not only fall into the rhythm of this story and its characters, but also fall in love with them along the way.

Speaking of characters, it’d be impossible for me to discuss how much I love this book without devoting at least a paragraph to them. Jeremy is a trans-boy who is charismatic, confident, and high-strung but is struggling with an intense anger living underneath his skin and in his heart. Lukas is a kind, shy boy with autism who has spent his life trying to be what everyone else needs to be at the expense of himself. The two of them are exes and in many ways, are just two queer teens lashing out at a world that continually denies them the respect and space they deserve. Upon starting this novel, I wasn’t quite sure I would enjoy both of their perspectives; by the end of this novel, I understood and loved that both of their point-of-views were absolutely essential to this novel. Their second-chance romance was truly a joy to witness, despite how rocky and wrought with heavy and often, unpleasant emotions and actions it was.

Which brings me to my absolute favorite part of this novel: the fact that Z.R. Ellor wrote a novel that openly allowed to its two queer teen protagonists to be complex, angry, and at times, downright messy and unlikable. I saw Z.R. Ellor tweet about this a few months before I read this, but this novel outright refuses to sanitize its trans and gay and autistic and gay protagonist into wholesome and easily digestible queer teens who are easy to root for. Several times throughout the story, each of the main protagonists do things that harms their friends, people around them, and even each other; while I can’t say I quite enjoyed reading about it most of the time, I loved how this book gave its queer characters the space to be fully fleshed out characters who aren’t beacons of goodness.

In particular, I loved how Ellor tied these complex and messy feelings the characters are feeling to the queer and neurodivergent experience, respectively. In Jeremy’s case, the pure wrath that he feels comes from constantly being disrespected as a man and feeling the need to prove his masculinity through not only achieving, but prototypical ideas that link violence to it. As for Lukas, his need to prove himself comes primarily from how other people view him being autistic combined with the death of his very successful older brother whom he had a complex but mostly negative relationship with. I also very much appreciated the fact that despite how messy and sometimes problematic these characters were, there was either always a narrative admonishing and/or correction of the problematic behavior or a delicate line about subjects such as a person’s gender, sexual identity, and more that was never crossed.

Conclusively, May The Best Man Win is my favorite book I’ve read thus far this year and I am eternally thankful that I was given the opportunity to read this early. This book comes out tomorrow so make sure you grab a copy from your local bookstore or borrow/request this from your local library. I promise you, you’ve never read a queer YA contemporary with this much complexity and heart before. Thank you Z.R Ellor for this excellent and much-needed addition to the queer YA canon.

I really loved the concept of this story. A trans-masc main character goes against his ex in competition for homecoming king. That sounds awesome. The deeper story was pretty good too. As I got to know the characters, I didn’t really like them. My best way to connect to a story is if I love the characters. Sadly I never felt the connection to them. The mc seemed to have a little bit of anger issues and the other character seems to blame the bad things they do on their disability. I may have been reading it wrong, but it just felt off to me.
I would definitely read something else by this author to give them another chance for me.
Overall I would give it a 3.5/5

I came very close to absolutely adoring this story because they were all written in such a raw way. They felt real and relatable and I could feel their pain.

The author's approach to the complex layering of gender and sexuality exploration as well as navigating neurotypical spaces with an autistic brain was fascinating. There were layers to the identities depicted and I appreciated the intersectionality of it.

The only thing stopping me from rating the story higher, though, is what I feel is the missed marked in making Jeremy flawed yet loveable, like Lukas views him as throughout the book. Jeremy's personality is fiery and he's impulsive, hiding his emotions with sarcasm and taking moments to recognize where he's overshadowed the ones he loves. That all felt real and easy to connect to.

How easy it was for him to go to a place where he could weaponize ableism to sort of level the playing field against transphobia, however, lost me entirely. I no longer trusted him to respect Lukas or that aspect of his identity from that point on.

It does contribute to the layered experiences of Lukas' identity that is a very tangible one, though.

With all that being said, I'm looking forward to the author's body of work and future projects and am curious about whether further development and focus will go to the secondary characters of this story.

****Thank You Netgalley for this ARC****
This book was the one I was really looking forward to. I am so happy that more books now have trans main characters. It is underrepresented, so I am glad it is now more mainstream. This was a sweet book, we have two boys who just have to meet in the middle and forgive each other.
Jeremy was such an angry boy, he had his reasons. I think he was too angry for a while, but as the story progresses you see that change because of Lukas. My heart broke for both of them.
Overall, it was a cute book with two great main characters and a rival love story through homecoming.

This book is <i>nuts</i>. Bonkers. Just absolutely insane.

MAY THE BEST MAN WIN reads like a soap opera in all the best ways. It's got unbelievable drama, a ridiculously benign plotline that goes in WILD directions, and a messy romance between even messier people at the center of it all.

I won't lie - I had some difficulty getting through this one. The first half of the book is riddled with characters doing absolutely awful things to each other; just when you think that Jeremy, the trans main character, has hit rock bottom, he busts out with some new cruel plan to get what he wants and burns several dozen bridges along the way. The people in this novel act so abhorrently than I almost couldn't do it. That much ferocity is borderline unrealistic.

But at the same time, they're <i>teenagers</i>. Not only that, but this book is told from two teenagers' perspectives. Of course everything feels like life or death. It's a really interesting contradiction, this book; it takes a bunch of incredibly serious topics (like sibling death, divorce, transphobia, and a whole smattering of other content warnings that have been well documented elsewhere), dials the drama up to eleven, rips the dial <i>off of the wall</i>, and proceeds to beat you in the face with it. Like I said - it's insane. I can't say much more than that without spoiling things, but sufficed to say, I was never bored while reading this book.

There's a lot of flaws with telling stories this way; mainly that it can sometimes cheapen whatever messaging the author may have intended when they set out to write this book. I could feel a few places where the paint was peeling off the proverbial walls, and it really felt like things fell apart a little <i>too</i> easily. But I definitely had fun reading this book, and at the end of the day, what else can you realistically ask for?

(Special thanks to the Cresswell alumni at MacMillan for the NetGalley ARC!)

May the Best Man Win is going to lift your spirits with humor before crushing your heart with it’s ability to transform your idea of who you are and who you want to be.

This book follows two ex-boyfriends, Jeremy and Lukas, as they navigate Jeremy’s transition, Lukas’ familial drama, and most importantly Homecoming King. Throughout the Novel, ZR Elliot does an amazing job of showcases different identities, phobias, and the general LGTBQ+ world without ever making it feel like anything other than a story about two boys fighting for a crown. His effortless, beautiful novel will be your next favorite while allowing you to explore what or who you really are.

Content warnings: death of a sibling, ableism, transphobia, homophobia, slurs, misgendering, deadnaming, toxic relationship with parents, bullying, physical assault, discussion of/references to past sexual harassment/assault, racism

3.5 stars, rounded up. Most important thing to know about this book is that it is not a romcom. I think the kind of framing around it of dating to exes to enemies to lovers made me think that, and it was not something that was explicitly used as marketing language, but I want to clarify for anyone else who might have made the same inference based on the tropes and the cover. Which is so interesting, because some of my favourite adult romances have illustrated covers and that's never been an indication to me that they're "just fluff" and devoid of serious things. In fact, kind of the opposite..

Boy howdy, this book was tough. There is A LOT of trauma represented here. And also, a really important look at identity and how messy and shitty teenagers are, and about internalized and socialized gender roles, and communication, and community. Jeremy and Lukas are both in their senior year at what essentially seems to be a prep school. There's lots of alumni-backed money specifically for Homecoming, and the whole book centers around the lead-up to the big game/dance. They used to date. Jeremy came out as trans recently, he breaks up with Lukas in a pretty drastic way (on the day of Lukas' brother's funeral) for reasons that are unclear to Lukas, now they're mortal enemies and are competing for the role of Homecoming King. Even before they were dating, they had been best friends for a really long time, so they have a lot of the same friends, and there's approximately a metric shit-ton of drama that ensues. Lukas is also grappling with being autistic but not wanting anyone at school to know about that, so rather than ask for accommodations for his disability, he decides to cheat. (I've seen some criticisms that the autism rep only comes up with relevance to Lukas' schoolwork, but it's pretty obvious to me that a big part of the miscommunications that happen are people expecting Lukas to pick up on social cues that he has trouble reading, and them getting upset when he doesn't get it. So that criticism doesn't really hold water to me, but I'm also not an autistic reviewer, so I can't speak 100% to that.)

If you are a person who needs to like the main characters to enjoy a book, I would think twice about this one. Then again, if you are a person who doesn't remember what it was like to be in high school...I mean, I don't know anyone who was perfectly likeable in high school. Though I have not been a trans boy in high school, I have been a post-trauma kid in high school, imagining that I should hurt other people before they have a chance to hurt me. I found that so relatable. I ALSO was the kid who covered immense sadness with anger because anger is an easier, more familiar emotion to deal with. Was Jeremy truly terrible to people who he claimed were friends? Yes. Is there really a satisfactory resolution to that, or a true reckoning for Jeremy about how incredibly self-centered he is? Not really. But one of the most interesting aspects of this book to me was the kind of overcorrection that Jeremy feels he has to do to convince everyone that he's a boy, which feels like the root of so much of his hurtful behavior. Imagining how it must feel to have something that feels so obvious to you be something you need to convince people of, that you have to constantly defend...I understand where the overcorrection comes from. So in order to make sure that people see him as a guy, Jeremy adopts some aspects of toxic masculinity, telling himself he has to do certain things because "that's what a guy would do" AND to distance himself from anything that might be seen as "feminine" because there's always the risk that people will think that he's not serious about being trans. Ellor mirrors that with a class assignment where Jeremy has to create a persuasive speech about a particular hot topic, and his is trans rights. Yikes. That was so devastating to read, honestly, that any trans person but a teenager especially has to spend their brain power worrying about that stuff rather than just being an idiot kid.

There were a couple of things that brought it down a star(ish) in my mind. I think the ending resolved too quickly for my tastes, and there were a number of things that didn't really get wrapped up as a result. The treatment of the "side characters" felt pretty crummy, they really only exist as vehicles for Jeremy and Lukas and not as people in their own right (though I would love to read a book about whatever's going on with Sol and Naomi), and I didn't love that. It could have been a really great opportunity for found family and queer community, and I think that Ellor was trying to elicit that feel, but since it wasn't the A (or B or C) plot, it didn't really develop in the way that I would have liked to see. Lukas' realization that he's not straight was less an epiphany and more of a throwaway, which felt strange to me, but I suppose that's how it might be for some folks when they're realizing their sexuality (though it wasn't for me) and it's true that there were about a fafillion other things happening in his life. I do think there was, like, one thing too many for me here, but overall, I'm glad to have read it and I can already tell it's one that I'm going to be thinking about it often.

Thanks to NetGalley and MacMillan Children's Publishing Group/Roaring Brook Press for an advance copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Thank you to Netgalley and Macmillan Children's Publishing Group for a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All thoughts and opinions expressed in this review are my own.

I really didn't enjoy this book, I wanted too but I just hated it. The main characters are Jeremy and Lukas. They used to date until Jeremy dumped Lukas so he could come out as trans without being rejected by him. Once Jeremy starts his transition he struggles with proving he is man enough and in doing so he starts treating all his friends like crap. I understand how he would struggle with finding himself and feeling like he had to prove himself, however Jeremy is self loathing, spiteful, and has major anger issues that he never does anything to try and fix. At one point he admits he has anger issues and that maybe he should try to be less angry but then nothing ever happens to show him changing to be a better person. He treats everyone like an enemy no matter how much they try to help him, he hurts his friends over and over and it's all just okay. Lukas struggles with autism, which I think the author could have done something really good here but they didn't. His autism is used to just explain away his actions and is never dealt with. His teacher is allowed to deny him the technology he uses to help learn and that isn't dealt with either. Lukas does something that hurts a friend who gets in trouble because of it. When he does admit to it, it's all but swept under the rug because the principal screwed up too and doesn't want that getting out. There are no consequences for literally anybody in this book. Including the bully and the principal who ignores the bullying.

In my opinion, the book was portrayed as something lighthearted and a little romantic. This is not the case at all. There are a lot of hard hitting themes in here. Such as; bullying, parental separation, homophobia, transphopia, ableism, assault, death and more. I feel like this book could have been a lighthearted story and left out the heavy situations or it could have been dark and hard hitting with all the difficult themes in it. However, I don't think the way it is mashed into one works at all.

Unfortunately, I can't recommend this book to anyone.

I initially started out with the audiobook and had to switch over to a digital copy. I was able to make more progress this way, but I wasn't able to finish the book due to unlikable characters. Normally I don't mind unlikable characters, but the ones in this story were next level. The way Jeremy treated Naomi made me so upset. The way he broke up with Lukas made my skin crawl. Lukas wasn't as bad as Jeremy, but he had some suspect moments as well. There is also a line saying all lesiban's are TERF"S and I did some research and found that to be problematic. Stereotyping a whole group of people is never right in my eyes. So, I won't be continuing with this story.

Messy teens getting to be messy? Trans main character? Exes who become enemies and rivals to lovers? All of my boxes were checked, checked, checked with this one.

May the Best Man Win tells the story of Jeremy, a trans boy who is newly out at his high school and campaigning for homecoming king… against his ex-boyfriend Lukas who he dumped before coming out and starting to transition. Both are desperate to win the crown, to show their families and friends that they’re worthy of the title, the recognition, and the love.

One of the best things about this is, as previously stated, messy teens getting to be messy. Jeremy especially has a lot of anger that he’s working through and, more often than not, he takes this anger out on his friends. He can be selfish and ruthless and is often accused of thinking only about himself. Watching him work through this and start to change how he treats people was so refreshing and realistic to actual high school friendships. I have never known a group of friends not to fight, not to throw around harsh and angry words when external forces are at play. High school is the wild world of hormones and watching these teens have hard experiences with each other and facing consequences for their words and actions was a breath of fresh air. Not every story needs to have a perfect main character. The flaws are what make them realistic.

When it comes to high school-set YA books, I always think about how much I would have loved the book as a teen and how much I needed it. This one is up there right on top. I think this book will be more than helpful to teens who find it. It will be monumental. Z.R. Ellor has written something that will resonate and I can't wait to see what's next.

5 stars.

OH MY GOODNESS. This was my most anticipated book of the year and it DID NOT DISAPPOINT. I absolutely adored Jeremy and Lukas's dynamic and I was hooked from the very first line. I'm SO glad I got to read it early. 5/5 WOULD RECCOMEND.

“Gender is stupid. It’s like one of those dystopian novels where everyone’s assigned to a group at birth and you just have to accept that? Like, how bizarre is that from the outside?”

So this was not entirely what I anticipated.

Based off the blurb and that darling cover, I was anticipating something more on the spectrum of rom-commy pranks and whatnot.

Instead, I got something a little more realistic, a lot more heartbreaking, and much more hopeful.

Jeremy Harkiss definitely suffers from Napoleon Syndrome, as he’s a Type A with a drive to always prove himself over and over and over. Part of this is because he’s trans and feels he must be more manly and successful than everyone else in order to be accepted as a boy, and part of this is because he is an obnoxious, self-centered teen like…well, a lot of teens. Also, his name is Jeremy, and I have literally never met a Jeremy I liked. Sorry kid.

Lukas, on the other hand, was someone who was just as driven, but suffered heavily from second child syndrome, made doubly horrific because his Golden Brother died in a really tragic way the previous May and because he felt his parents were stuck with the defective son (Lukas is autistic and really internalized that by trying to be Perfect in every way). His storyline was heartbreaking and my heart just shown for him, as he’s struggling to keep everything together, fix everything broken even if it’s out of his control, and is reeling from his (abusive) brother’s death and Jeremy’s sudden breakup with him (he dumped Lukas in a diner after Golden Boy’s funeral…and threw a strawberry milkshake in his face—there’s a good reason for this, but a lot of it was Jeremy learning to process his dysphoria and unintentional misgendering from others in a healthier way).

A lot of this book deals with what comes next, and how to prepare for it. What comes after high school? How do you position yourself to get into a fantastic school and set yourself up for your heart’s desires (even if you don’t exactly know what they are yet)? How do you recover from a breakup? How do you publicly transition during your senior year? How do you grief after your brother’s death? How do you get up, after failing horribly?

I gave this four stars because it was good, although pretty heavy.

However, I loved that we got a really realistic lovers to enemies to lovers, as both Jeremy and Lukas had a lot of ground to cover to get to that point. There are also so many queer characters, and both leads grow so much as human beings, as they learned to dismantle the walls they had built around each other and open themselves up to love, hope and life.

And the ending has a fabulous twist!

Please note that there are some serious trigger warnings in this one, particularly: transphobia, homophobia, grooming, ableism and ableist language (the r-word is used), death of a sibling, child abuse, bullying.

3.5/4 stars

Jeremy, a trans guy, is cheer captain and in the running for homecoming king at his prestigious private high school. He's running against his ex, Lucas, football player and all-around nice guy. But they didn't end on the best of terms last summer... Jeremy dumped Lucas the day of Lucas's older brother's funeral. Plus, there's lots of family drama: at Lucas's house it's all about how his brother's death is tearing about his parents' marriage and at Jeremy's house it's all about how Jeremy's single mom isn't the most accepting of Jeremy's transition. So there's lots of angst, lots of self-assessment, lots of hormones, and lots of teenage tunnel-vision on winning homecoming king.

What I liked about this book:
- I like that while this book is a *trans* book, it's also *not* a trans book. Jeremy's trans-ness is definitely a big part of the story, but it's also just a general teen story: two guys are battling it out for homecoming king.
- I loved the character of Sol!
- I loved how/who the winner of homecoming king is.

What I disliked about this book:
- I disliked that the audiobook is voice-acted by the same person for both the Jeremy chapters and the Lucas chapters. When a book has multiple narrators, it is easiest to parse it when they are voice-acted by different actors.
- Jeremy is a massive asshole. That's just his personality.
- I felt super bad for Naomi. She constantly gets the bum end of the story throughout this book.

Diverse/LGBTQIA+ reads:
- Lucas is autistic.
- Jeremy is trans (female to male) and there is a lot of discussion about what not being a good ally looks like so as to show readers how to be a good ally.
- Sol is nonbinary and uses they/them pronouns.
- Lucas goes from straight to questioning to gay.

I read this book in physical form and honestly I gave it a higher review at the time but upon a reread via this audiobook I am going to go back and change it. I'm not sure how I didn't notice how problematic this book was while reading it but I couldn't not see it this time.
This was obviously meant to be your classic YA romance only with a much more diverse cast of characters. Ellor did a good job in that aspect. The characters were diverse(ish) and the plot followed the basic YA romance formula but otherwise this book felt very very problematic.
The first problem was the main characters where absolutely horrible. I didn't like them at all! Jeremy in particular was a major problem. His toxic masculinity was so annoying and gross in so so many places. I honestly could have let it go but it was not addressed nearly as much as it should have been! It drove me crazy the whole book and i was just waiting and waiting for it to be properly addressed but it never was!
Secondly the major relationship. They were so toxic! They were supposed to be cute and the arguing was meant to be because they were "in love" but it just all felt so so toxic. I in no way wanted them to be together because all I could see was an absolute disaster!
This really was just to problematic for me. Maybe I am misunderstanding something as I am not trans and I am a lesbian but I hope this amount of toxic masculine isn't needed for a book about gay men....
Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for the early review copy.