Quick read with funny anecdotes from the author’s life. The writing style was very immersive and felt like I was in the situations described.

s someone who has never read John Paul Brammer's advice column, I was pleasantly surprised by Hola Papi: How to Come Out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons. It was heartfelt, funny, introspective, and well-written, and though I would have loved a more linear format of storytelling, I really enjoyed the book.

Hola Papi: How to Come Out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons is a collection of John Paul Brammer's selected advice columns the speak on cultural and racial identity, being queer and smart in an intolerant, rural town, and the pain of love and loss. I could relate, personally, to very few of those elements on a superficial basis, but I felt his words profoundly and I think the book will connect particularly well with queer millennial-aged readers.

Parts of this book are funny and light, and parts of the story make you ache in a bone-deep way. I wanted to reach back in time to hug John Paul Brammer numerous times. Some of the essays made me want more of a conclusion to a particular story, but I was very pleased with what I got.

John Paul Brammer is a talented writer, and Hola Papi: How to Come Out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons is a great read for those who want a well-rounded collection of personally essays and stories.

*Copy provided in exchange for an honest review*

I had been following Brammer on Twitter for a while when I learned he would be publishing a book. It was mid-March, and I don't know how I had missed all his previous posts announcing this, but I finally became away of this book's existence. I knew he had an advice column, the inspiration for the format of this book, but I'd never perused the pieces. I was enamored enough with his tweeting style to know I needed to read this because I knew already that I would love it.

And I was so very right.

As a whole, this book is delightful. In parts, it is also equally delightful. I can easily imagine a future version of me with a physical copy, sitting down and reading one chapter at a time. Some of the chapters were similar (which is why they're in a collection together), which lent to taking breaks between reading. If I were to read it all in one sitting, I perhaps would have gotten bored (I doubt it, because the prose is simply that entertaining). It's like a mixed bag of treats that you get to sit down and enjoy, with some sweeter than others and some small enough you encourage yourself to have just one more.

Looking at the advice column after reading this book, it's easy to see how it was pared down to better match the format of a collection of essays. The advice column features long letters from readers, while the book itself opens each 'chapter' with a short and sweet sentence with the same idea behind it: a question seeking advice, just with slightly less backstory. Some chapters felt long, some were long but felt short, and some were simply short, but they all did what they needed to do: share an anecdote to answer the opening question, and they all did it beautifully.

Despite not being "a Twitter-addled gay Mexican with anxiety" (taken from the bolded opening of Brammer's posts on his Substack blog/newsletter), I still found this book to be relatable in numerous. Personally, I connect most whenever he delved into his anxieties about being a writer for a living. As much as I related to the worry of not being, I found hope in that I was reading something this person—so full of worries—was getting published. It was like a silhouette of my future had become tangible and handheld. Even still, this collection of essays helped me in ways I didn't anticipate. It inspired me to keep writing, inspired me to write more personal things about myself, inspired me to reflect and consider things in ways I hadn't previously.

I would recommend this book to anyone: those already a fan of Brammer's work, those who like to read nonfiction essays, those looking for a book in a genre they may not normally read. Excited for this book to be published!

A book that is terribly difficult to put down. Reading John Paul Brammer is a delight. The stories in this book about making sense of one's identity are told in a lithe, conversational style, but are incredibly poignant. This book is truthful and deeply heart-felt. We are lucky to have another wonderful memoir to point people to about the LGBT experience. A delight to read!

Very quick and enjoyable read. I can relate a lot to the author's struggle with ethnicity in a rural community. The author has a humorous tone throughout the book without seeming cheesy or fake. There are lots of description about the dating app scene and how that can mentally, physically, and emotionally take a toll on a person who is single, especially within the queer community. Overall loved this book.

This book is a delight. John Paul Brammer writes in earnest with self-awareness and openness. He's navigating what it's like to be queer, to be Mexican, to be young, and to be a writer. He writes about cultural crossroads and how to be "enough" of anything. The stories he lays out in his advice letters feel honest and raw, and I think the world will be better for him having shared them. I related to a lot of what he has written, so I'm thankful for this book.

Buckle up for an emotional, personal, devastating and humorous journey in Hola Papi: How to Come Out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons, by John Paul Brammer.

Brammer pivots from his career as a popular LGBTQ Advice-Columnist to penning his memoir-in-essays about life lessons growing up as a mixed-race, gay young man in America's Heartland.
You're in good hands as Brammer invites the reader along amid his personal odyssey.

John Paul is struggling to figure out how to "be", as in...
How to be "gay"
How to be "ethnic"
How to be in love
How to find authenticity
How to love himself.
These are universal experiences and you'll find yourself connecting with the author and cheering him on along the way.

I loved the '“Chicano Carrie Bradshaw” of his generation' and can't wait to see what he writes next!
Thank you NetGalley for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

This is a Simon & Schuster publication and is set to be released on June 8, 2021.

Funny! Funny! Funny! I really loved this memoir. I was not previously familiar with JP's work, but I loved the way he structured this book - each chapter is a question being asked to his advice column, "Hola Papi". WHat a great personality, it certainly shines through in this fun memoir!

I was provided an e-ARC from Netgalley. This book surprised me. I only know the author from following him on twitter and obviously that's a terrible platform to get a 'real' idea of a person, but I assumed this book would be on the pithier side. A good smattering of self deprecating humor, maybe. Instead, the stories felt very real and raw and containing a lot of heavy topics that were handled with care. I particularly liked the chapters where he reflected on pain as a metric for authenticity. I think that's an issue that's really been escalating in our society. I don't know how to fix it, but I would at least like it acknowledged.

If you adore JP Brammer's online presence, do yourself a favor and get a copy of this memoir, ASAP. Charming and witty in equal measure, Brammer brings to light questions, experiences, and answers that find a home not only in the queer community, but for anyone who's wondered where their place is in the world - and how to get there alive - not just to survive, but to thrive.

Thank you to NetGalley and Simon & Schuster for advance access to this title!

I have favorited many a tweet from JP and was so excited to read this memoir. Does not disappoint a bit and maybe one of my favorite memoirs this year.

Just finished this ARC copy of @jpbrammer upcoming book Hola Papi! And I loved it for so many reasons! John Paul writes stories that are so relatable and I found myself nodding along and wondering how he managed to write essays about me? 🤣
•if you’ve ever been bullied
•been ghosted
•wondered if you were doing the right thing •felt lost and hopeless
•felt found and brazen
•felt fashionably unfashionable
•felt ugly and got all at once
•fallen in love with the idea of love
Then this is the book for you!
MARK YOUR CALENDARS “Hola Papi!” Is out 6/8/2021 💜💃🏽

This book is so hilarious and earnest. I was laughing out loud and clutching my pearls and reading it out loud to anyone that would listen. I love the heartfelt advice, with a side of shade! It’s kind of like Dear Sugar but updated for millennials. I could go on and on about each favorite moment, but we would be here all day. I would put this book in the hands of anyone who was grappling with their own identity, finding their way in the world, or navigating true my relationship traps. This book will entertain, distract, and help you process a lot of “life stuff.”

This is a riveting, engaging book of essays by LGBTQ+ advice columnist John Paul Bremmer. The chapters are divided and formatted as answers to advice seekers. This works quite well, as you are drawn in as a reader and it feels very much like the author is speaking directly to you. It felt warm, engaging, conversational. Bremmer's writing draws you in. I appreciate his voice as an author--there is an honesty and a vulnerability to it that allows you to understand his experiences but also relate them to your own, in a conversational, accessible way. There are some heavy topics addressed in this collection of essays but there are so many light-hearted moments and amusing anecdotes as well. I enjoyed reading this book. The time flew by as I did.

He tells his story of being a gay Mexican-American growing up in Oklahoma in a series of essays that each focus on one important question. His answers dig deep and he reveals so much of himself in the narrative. His hopes, his dreams, his aspirations, his questioning himself, his darkest moments, his struggles to find his way, the challenge of fitting in, the road to being true to himself. Readers will empathize, sympathize, see themselves in his stories.

The questions and essays are so relatable, whatever demographic you find yourself in. Some will resonate more than others but all are pertinent.

This was truly a delight to read. I look forward to more from JP Brammer. This was an important book for me to read and it has left me with many thoughts on his words and experience.

Highly recommended.

My thanks to netgalley and the publisher for the digital ARC. This is my honest review.

Overall, I enjoyed spending some time seeing the world through the eyes of John Paul Brammer. He presents a unique perspective, one too often missed in the world of memoir - that of a queer Latino man. Each chapter is framed as an advice column that also digs into different aspects of the author's personal story. It's also an excellent insider's look at what it means to start a career in writing today.

I do wish the author had spent more time exploring the issues at the core of the book's title. The exotification and limited representation of Latino men, especially in queer culture, is a real issue and was one of my reasons for wanting to read this book. Brammer didn't spend much time digging into it and I would love to see more of that in a future book from him.

As noted above, each chapter is framed as an advice column, complete with nicknames for each of the people who wrote asking for advice. Brammer directs some of his advice directly at these people, calling them by their nicknames. I found this a bit distracting and would have been OK without the asides. I know he's an advice columnist, but I think the book could have worked without it.

Please note, this book includes descriptions of childhood bullying and frank discussion of mental health, including suicidal ideation and attempts. There is also a bit of open-door sex.

<i>Hola Papi</i> is a short, pithy, intense read. John Paul Brammer writes an <i>Ask Abby</i> style column for the popular mens hookup app Grindr as <i>Papi</i>, the name he was tokened with as a young, Mexican gay. In <i>Hola Papi</i>, John Paul poses a number of life questions to Papi that he responds to with short essays detailing his life experiences, including the good, the bad, and the ugly. John Paul balances humor and pain admirably, making the tough bits readable (although TW for sexual assault, abuse, etc.).

I enjoyed the style of this book, the writing, and the life reflections. Highly recommend. Thank you to the publisher for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Favorite quotes:
<i>"To be clear, I didn't think anybody had any business giving someone else advice, really, unless that person was a doctor or Dolly Parton."

"I'm not sure that person exists at all. I think there are simply important people in our lives. They don't always stay important. They don't always stick around. But the point at which we meet them, the point on the grid where our lives intersect, is a sacred thing. It makes them 'the one' in that moment; just because that moment ends, it doesn't mean it's any less special."

"So who, exactly, had been holding me back from being the person I'd wanted to be, and was that person in fact myself?"

"I don't think it's 'nothing' that we're mourning when it comes to our 'almost relationships,' Passing. I think it's fine, healthy, even, to formalize our goodbyes to mere possibilities--to things that could have happened, might have happened, the hopes and expectations and flights of fancy.
"It's fine to want things. It's fine to bid them farewell."

"If my voice might do more harm than good, then I am not the voice that needs to speak, even if I am in love with the sound of my own voice."

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<p>Review copy provided by the publisher.</p>
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<p>Some of you already know this about me and some probably don't: I <em>love</em> advice columns. Love love love them. I love to find out how people frame their problems, who they approach, what that person has to say, whether it's by way of solution or meditation. Brammer is an advice columnist, with the same title for his column as for this book, and that's how he's learned to organize memoir writing: around questions of what to do and how to do it.</p>
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<p>His prose voice is comfortable and friendly, and this book is short enough that having it structured as an essay per quite-general question from the advice-seeker reader doesn't have time to wear thin. Brammer is entirely willing to go personal about identity, race, sexuality, mental health, and all the things that orbit those major topics. His personal stories are vivid and compelling, and it's a fast read even for slower readers than I am.</p>
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This collection of essays will make you laugh and cry all in the same essay. John Paul Brammer is a very skilled writer and is not afraid to share the details. I enjoyed each essay and looked forward to reading the next one when I finished the first one.. My favorite essay was the one responding to Reader where he acknowledges sometimes the smartest thing to do is recognize that your self-helplessness is the best answer to a situation. The essays in full are not applicable for classroom use because of the nature of the content, but I can easily use portions of many of his essays as case studies to help my students talk about bullying, relationship boundaries, and self-advocacy.

This essay collection is charming, heartfelt, and frequently funny. If you enjoy Brammer's regular column you will probably enjoy this book! I found myself highlighting many different parts. The first three essays are absolutely incredible, but I found the rest of the book less engaging. Definitely still good, but not as much as the first part of the book.

I received an ARC of this book for an honest review. had no experience with this author-had never read his advice column or seen any of his artwork so I had no preconceived notions of his work. What a beautiful, delightful surprise for me to read this book! I love his voice-his ability to share his experiences in an authentic way and yet still let you read your own experiences in his advice. I love how he encourages everyone to understand that their story doesn't have to end with the things that have happened to them-that we can acknowledge them as just part of our story, not the end of our story. There is so much power in that advice.