I wish this book had come with a content warning, given the setting and the bio I expected homophobia to be a theme, but wasn't expecting the intensity of the sexual abuse and child abuse which were also core themes of the novel. It somewhat hindered my enjoyment of the book because I had gone in thinking it would be a coming of age romance, with some angst but moments of relief and the joy of a first love.

With that being said I keep listening because it was well written and had be invested in the outcome of Clare and Esther's future. Though intense the more sinister elements of the novel are implied as opposed to written in gratuitous detail. You still get that sick feeling in your stomach but not in a way that feels exploitative. It's just a lot and by the end near relentless.

Ivy Tara Blair was a fantatasic narrator and certainly a key element in what kept me listening.

There were a lot themes being explored in this book unfortunately I couldn't keep my interest in it. I found myself constantly looking at how much of the book I had left to read. I don't know if it was the narration or if I have perhaps read other books of this nature that explore the themes in a more consumable way but this wasn't a good fit for me. It's terrible to say I even felt bored in parts, the pacing seemed way off. Nevermind, you can't like them all.

Not My Ruckus takes place in the 1980s and follows 14yr old girl who is being raised in an extremely religious household in the South (USA). The MC is incredible, she is strong and brave and her character will stick with you long after you finish reading. The abuse she faces, and how she doesn’t even recognise it as such is truly heartbreaking.

This novel touches on many topics such as being queer in a small religious town in the 80s, having an undiagnosed disability and abuse of all kinds. The further you get into the story, the more disturbing it becomes as you find out just how rampant the violence and abuse is.

I wasn’t sure what to expect but Not My Ruckus is a beautifully written and super impactful story that will stay with me for a long time. Chad Musick has a real talent and I would love to read more of his work.

Thank you to NetGalley for providing a copy in exchange for my honest review.