“You’ve decided to leave the hustle and bustle of the city to stretch your legs in the bucolic countryside of these green and pleasant lands. You’ve read the books and watched the shows. You know what to expect: you’ll drink a pint in the sunny courtyard at the local pub. You’ll wander down charming alleyways between stone cottages. Residents will tip their flatcaps at you as they bicycle along cobblestone streets. It will be idyllic. The author respectively suggests you put aside these fantasies. It is possible that you will find yourself in a placid and tedious little corner of England; it is just as possible that you will end up in an English Murder Village. You will not know you are in a Murder Village, as they look like all other villages. When you arrive in Shrimpling or Pickles-in-the-Woods or Wombat-on-Sea or wherever it is, there will be no immediate signs of danger. This is exactly the problem. You are already in the trap. If you still insist on pursuing this course of action, commit the following information to memory. It may help you remain alive, if anything can.“—from Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village

Meet the buildings, events, and residents of the Murder Village that IS actively plotting to kill you. Then saunter up to The Manor for twenty-seven, or so, other ways you can die. There WILL be a quiz later, or maybe two.

Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village would make a cute gift for the Anglophile mystery fan in your life. It picks up all those traditional English village mystery tropes familiar to Agatha (both Christie and Raisin) fans everywhere. While the text is humorous, don’t forget to look closely at the illustrations. You might find one of dueling pistols in the never-open Antique Shop has been recently fired. Or that two human eyes are hidden in the Pub’s jar of pickled eggs.

Expect many snickers and sighs but only a few laugh-out-loud moments. Still, such a cute idea and great gift. 4.5 stars rounded up to 5 stars!

Thanks to Ten Speed Press and NetGalley for a copy in exchange for my honest review.

This book plays on tropes from English traditional and cozy mysteries, providing a guide to staying alive if you happen to visit an English Murder Village, where people drop like flies every day of the week. The idea is clever, pairing Maureen Johnson's humor with creepy black, white, and red illustrations, but I didn't enjoy this as much as I would have liked to. Some of the descriptions of places, people, and events in the village are wonderfully comedic, but others are just a sentence or two, with statements that quickly become similar, repetitive, and overdone. The mere mention of death can only be an effective punchline so many times.

Some of the illustrations and jokes are also very gruesome. Many people prefer traditional and cozy mysteries specifically because they are less violent and gory, so this is best for people who enjoy classic tropes and violent details. I particularly didn't care for the jokes about murdered children or orphans. This book will best appeal to people who enjoy dark and morbid jokes, but even then, the book doesn't have much staying power. This seems best as a library book, where lots of people can check it out for a few chuckles.

Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village is a quick but enjoyable read. The illustrations, all in black and white with occasional pops of red, are as charming as they are coyly gruesome. The writing is meticulously wry, and while the humor is fairly consistent in tone and pacing, there are a handful of exceptionally funny bits sprinkled throughout. If anything, I'd say that the first section dealing with only the village was certainly humorous but felt a bit random, as though I was still waiting for some kind of punchline, but the second section with the manor and the people inside it is the real comedic heart of this book.

I didn't know what to expect going into Maureen Johnson's Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village, but what I got was a hilarious guide book that kept me laughing the entire time I was reading it. From the description of the characters and locations and events everything was comedic gold.

Let me start off by saying I will read anything Maureen Johnson writes, especially murder mystery books. When this title was released, I was thrilled. I received an ARC from NetGalley and it was...well I don't know what it was.

The book is an 'instruction manual' on how to not get murdered, as implied by the title. But, it really didn't have a point. It was supposed to be a comedy/parody but instead it was just words on a page with no cohesive point to it. There were some lines that made me laugh ("The Village Shop: It sells cheese, stamps, tea, and death" // "The Gardner: The roses are perfect because of all the people under them") but overall I didn't find it comedic and I think that took away from the point of the book.

Its divided up into sections that example how you could get murdered in a quaint English town.
Buildings and Spaces - places in town to avoid
Residents - people to avoid
Village Events - events to avoid
Rooms and Architecture - locations in buildings to avoid
People living in the Manor - household, guests, and staff
Manor Events - don't trust events the Manor hosts if you are invited

It was a cute outline and had the potential to be funny but it came off more dull than actually entertaining. Overall, this book was not what I expected. The phrase I kept thinking over in my head was "what is the point of this?" I'd recommend checking it out if you want a quick, 30 minute read with nice artwork, but perhaps save this for a book you ask your library to get and check it out from the library.

Thank you for the EArc NetGalley & Ten Speed Press. This was adorable. The illustrations were beautiful and there were a ton of interesting little details in each one. I laughed out loud a couple of times and I loved how it took me away to another place. I highly recommend reading this in bed on a rainy day with a good cup of tea. The only problem is it leaves you wanting more! Wonderfully done! #YourGuidetoNotGettingMurderedinaQuaintEnglishVillage #NetGalley

Maureen Johnson peels off the quaint cover that hides the murderous truth of visiting the English village. You have seen the BBC TV shows and want to visit a village yourself. Take Johnson's advice and stay far, far away so that you can keep reading and watching your favorite shows. Jay Cooper provides the illustrations of the locations, inhabitants, and scenes that Johnson sketches so quickly. I just wish that the duo would have ventured forth into the fields around the village and manor to visit the farmlands. A fun, quick read appropriately illustrated!

Thanks Netgalley for the chance to read this title!

This darling little book made me laugh out loud! It poked fun at all of the usual tropes of British murder mysteries in the most charmingly tongue-in-cheek way. Those illustrations just made it even more perfect and amusing. I showed our library director the blurb for the book on NetGalley, and she already has an order card filled out for it! I can't wait to see what the finished product looks like.

A delightful and witty read with clever illustrations. Would make a good gift for a cozy mystery reader.

This light, humorous book pokes fun at the conventions of cozy mysteries set in English villages. It's very reminiscent of Edward Gorey, but somewhat lacks his dark wit. The illustrations and text are amusing enough and the book short enough to justify the quick read, but it's a little too lightweight to be enduring.

I received this book from NetGalley in exchange for a fair review.