This is her side of the story. It's not the edited, sensationalized portrayal seen and heard by millions in the media coverage of this segment of Debra Newell's life. From the outside looking in, most would say Debra led a charmed life prior to meeting Dirty John. In truth, her life's path had been a rocky one that often left her bruised and battered. When Dirty John's abuse started, she recognized it as the usual interactions between two people. It is only as the abuse intensified that she would begin her struggle to be free. As you read further, most will be horrified at how little help she received from the agancies put in place to recognize the dangers and get the family to safety. This is truly a book that should be read by most people, both as a warning and an educational example of what a relationship is not supposed to be.

Having watched the TV show I knew I had to request this book written by Debra Newell who fascinated me all throughout the show. It is a surreal tale of our times, how someone with nothing can latch on to someone with everything and make up a past and a present life in order to get what they want out of that person to their own end game. I loved reading this story and wish Ms Newell and her daughters the very best for the future.

I'm not too sure what to say about this book. I feel bad rating someone's personal story, but this book was just rough for me. I struggled with this book. I felt it was a bit repetitive and she added things that felt didn't need to be part of the book. I feel bad for what Debra and her family went though, they did go through a lot.

This book is about the crimes of John Meehan as told from the perspective of his last victim, Debra Newell. John was a dangerous and violent con artist, who latched on to Debra and made the lives of her and her family a living nightmare. This was a fascinating case to me, and I became interested in the book after watching the mini series on Netflix. Debra mentions in the book many times that the mini series and media portrayed her as naive, making poor decisions, not understanding the actions she was taking. While I understand that it is impossible to know how you would react in the same situation, and that everyone reacts differently to trauma and violence, at some point you have to stop and really look at what is going on. You need to listen to the people around you. You need to listen to your own intuition. I found it extremely hard to understand why certain actions were taken, especially near the end. I also understand that John targeted her for her money, as she is a successful businesswoman, but the constant reminder of her wealth (my Tesla, my Jaguar, my penthouse, etc) got annoying after a while and took away from her story a bit. It was fascinating to see the crime through her eyes and to hear her experience with John first hand, and it was an interesting case. I am glad that everyone ended up okay, that’s for sure. But I think this book missed the mark. I think the main goal was to explain what happened in her own words so that people would not judge her any longer. I don’t know that she was successful in that goal.

I would recommend this book to anyone who enjoys true crime, con artist stories and first hand accounts of criminal activity.

I had heard about the Dirty John case. The story is told by Debra Newell who thought she had found love with John Meehan. More than a tabloid-ready true-crime expose, Debra’s story is one of trauma, denial, and deception. But it is also a relatable, inspirational, and hopeful story of forgiveness and, most of all, love. The lengths to which a woman will go to find—and keep—love; the boundaries children and parents cross to protect and save the people they love; the love one must find for oneself; and the ways the illusion of love can be used to manipulate and hurt.

The story was very well told and I feel for Debra and her family. What an awful situation to go through. I am glad she is able to tell her story.

I have to say that I was completely captivated from start to finish. The author did an excellent job of researching and presenting the details of the case, which kept me engaged throughout the entire book.
What I appreciated most about the book was how it delved into the minds of the criminals and the victims, giving me a deeper understanding of the motivations and emotions behind their actions. The author's writing style was clear and concise, making it easy to follow the complex details of the case.
Overall, I found this book to be a gripping and informative read. It shed light on a heinous crime and offered insights into the psychological factors at play. I would definitely recommend it to anyone who enjoys true crime stories or is interested in learning more about the darker side of human nature.

After watching the show (very loosely) based on Debra Newell's life and experience with John Meehan, and after listening to the episodes she did with Laura Richards, Jim Clemente and Lisa Zambetto on Real Crime Profile, I was more than ecstatic to be approved for an ARC read of Surviving Dirty John.

This book is beyond important.

Not only does it allow Newell to set the record straight after the show had reduced her to a 2-dimensional caricature and resulted in the festering of victim-blaming on social media, but it also provides an insight into the phenomenon of coercive control.

It seems incredible that Newell would go through so much trauma, but it is the reality of many women.

Hindsight is an incredible thing as well - as Newell describes Meehan's love-bombing and isolation techniques throughout the book, laid out all at once one after the other, it is easy to believe that we would have had the foresight to notice it. And it is terrifying to come to the realisation that we wouldn't. That people like Meehan who are as entitled and controlling as they are are master manipulators.

Thank-you to Newell for sharing her story, and for Phelps who worked so closely with her to bring the important, gruesome truth to light.

It was fun taking a deep dive into this story by an author I have enjoyed reading in the past. It was interesting to learn what really happened and see what TV has left out

An engaging read which for many fans and readers will enlighten them following the #Netflix hit TV show. Exploring a range of avenues and questions people will have had, this book is as scary as it is fascinating. Duplicity, scandal, love and loss all in one read.

The "Dirty John" story is an interesting one that's been told again and again through podcasts and TV but it's never been told like this before. Reading Debra's account of what happened put things into perspective and made it easier to understand why she stayed in the situation she was in. It's easy to get wrapped up in the "story" of true crime and we often forget that these things happened to real people. But reading it from Debra's own words really hit that this was her life and the trauma that she endured. She is brave for telling her story and it was well told.

I have been enthralled with this story since I heard about it and have listened to numerous podcasts cover this story which made me excited to be able to read a first hand account of the woman involved. I did feel as though this account telling was different enough to not feel repetitive from the other accounts of this story I have spent time listening to.


This book was very well written and includes explanations and details that help make sense of the decisions and choices the main character/real life victim made.

I wanted to read this book as I enjoyed the dramatisation of the Netflix production. This book doesn't disappoint and I feel that it was even better than the TV show. We get to see things from Debra's perspective and how it was for her.

This is a story of a true survivor. Debra has been through horrific experiences in her life and all she wanted was to be loved by someone.
Then, she met John. She fell for him, hard. He was charming, pleasant on the outside and made her feel like a true princess. On the inside, he was manipulative and controlling.

There were some parts of the story when I was screaming inside, thinking 'Leave him!', 'Don't let him treat you like this!'. However, the scary thing is that it can happen to any one of us. Debra was intelligent and successful, and yet she became a victim of domestic abuse and coercive control.

This book showcases domestic abuse, coercive control, but at the same time tells the story of a survival and that's Debra.

I would like to thank the publisher for accepting my NetGalley request to read and review this title.

I watched the show when it came out so I was interested in reading the book to hear more about the true story. Overall I thought it was written well and included many details I didn't know about. I would recommend to others interested in true crime to check this one out!

Thank you to Netgalley and BenBalla Books for an ecopy of this book in exchange for my honest review.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐
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Having seen the show on Netflix, listened to a few podcasts and read the book that the show was based on I definitely knew a lot of the information presented here already.
However, this was a quick read that still engaged me because Debra was able to share her side of the story---and set some facts straight.
It was interesting to read her reasoning behind things because you're quick to judge her as naive when you watch the show, but now I feel like a jerk for thinking that.

I could not put this book down. Surviving Dirty John is Debbie Newell’s story of meeting and falling in love with John Meehan, who turns out to be an evil psychopath.
Debbie’s life isn’t plain sailing even before she meets John; she experiences tragedy, broken marriages and dysfunctional role modelling by the mother she loves. Meeting John, however, is the worst thing to ever happen to her and her family. Debbie is a smart, successful mother of four who’s built a highly successful interior decorating business. She travels the world, hobnobs with celebrities, and retains her faith. John, however, is too smart for her, using coercive control to eventually alienate her from her family and steal from her. Just as you think things couldn’t get worse, they do. This book had me totally hooked as I read on in absolute horror about the sheer depravity of this man and what he was doing to this kind, loving woman.
Debbie wrote this memoir partly in response to the Netflix series about her relationship with John, as she felt she was portrayed unfairly – as someone gullible, naïve, even stupid. So perhaps she did use some poetic license to make the point that she was actually an intelligent woman that simply fell in love with a conman. She stresses how once she knew who John really was, she made a plan and played John at his own game. Debbie certainly comes across as someone I would like to know – kind, empathetic and intelligent. In this book she also shares advice given to her by her friend, Laura Richards, a British psychologist and criminal behavioural specialist who fights for victims of coercive control.

Having seen the TV series, I was immediately attracted to this book, knowing that it was a true crime book based on a real life tragedy. Wow, this book didn't disappoint me. For a woman who loves the true crime genre, this book dug into the nitty gritty of Debra's horrible story and M. William Phelps was once again his marvelous writing self.

I thought I knew this case well. I had listen to the podcast, seen the netflix seriers and even heard about the case after it first happened. But I still found this book interesting and enjoyable. There were details I didn't know and a very new, different insight into the case. I'm very thankful that Ms. Newell decided to share her story!

I appreciate hearing the story directly from the victim. No one can truly understand what it is like to be so manipulated and scared that you will do anything to keep your family safe. No one that hasn't lived it. The decisions Debra made were the best and safest for her at the time she made them. She is a victim and not at fault for anything that happened.
I hope Debra and her daughter continue to help others who have been victims. It amazes me that they were able to overcome this abuse.

I received this ARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

I first listened to the podcast, then watched the Bravo show. Now I've read the book. All are worth your time. I learned facts about this nightmare that I didn't know from the other two sources. Well written. Thank you, Ms Newell for writing this!

Unless someone was in your shoes, they shouldn't be judging you.

I wanted to read this after seeing the TV show. I thought the book was very well written and added a bit more context to what I already knew. I would reccomend it.