"A Girl Made of Air": 3.5⭐

(Unpaid Review: thank you to @netgalley, @nydiahetherington and the publishers for allowing me to read this eArc copy in exchange for a review.)

Such Night Circus vibes! I haven't read the book but by the aesthetic videos I've seen of it, it's definitely close to it! This book deals a lot with relationships and hard life decisions and memories. The girl made of air is Mouse and she has been through so much in her life, only to join the circus life.

I really liked the atmospheric feel of this book and the writing is spotless. However, I would like to see so much more of these characters! I definitely recommend this book tho!!

After many years of retirement, The Greatest Funambulist Who Ever Lived (our nameless narrator) has conceded to a single interview with a reporter. Inspired by the short exchange, she begins to write the story of her life, from unloved child of a post-war circus to a famous tightrope walker in New York.

Firstly, I should say that I enjoyed this book. Through all its grim tales and uncomfortable moments (please do see trigger warnings for this book if you’re at all concerned) I desperately wanted to keep reading. There’s a curious sense of magical realism to this story – myth is as important as the truth – and Hetherington’s characters have a larger-than-life quality, even as our narrator exposes the truth behind the myths. Are they likable characters? Debatable, but they’re certainly interesting.

The writing style is lyrical, and our narrator (unnamed) is full of personality and intense emotions, neatly drawing you in. I wanted to know her story, to know the details of the lost child that she is constantly searching for, but there were also some sections that made me incredibly uncomfortable as an asexual person. Don’t get the wrong idea: this is not a particularly sexy book – even at its most graphic, there is a certain distance to many of the events – but some of the assumptions made about desire and sexual interest struck an unpleasant chord with me that prevented it from being a four-star read. I am aware, however, that my relationship with sex is significantly more complicated than that of your average person: this is definitely a me issue.

Rating: ★ ★ ★ ½

Genre: Historical, Fiction, Minor Magical Realism

Trigger Warnings: Rape, Holocaust, Suicide, Depression, Alcoholism, (Background) Infidelity

Would I recommend this? Yes

Would I read a sequel? I don’t think it needs one. No.

Well.. This was ... quite weird. And consequently, kinda hard for me to review. Let me get some thoughts down:

* I don't tend to go in for circus stories. I have never been fascinated by the circus as a place, so I don't gravitate to stories about them. Not that I hate them! But I have no comparisons to make as to whether this is a good circus story or not. The circus is not made out to be a deeply loving family or a wonderful magical place... magical, perhaps, and certainly for the punters, but wonderful? Not always.

* The structure of the story is intriguing, and one of the aspects that I really enjoyed it. It opens with what might be a dream or might be a memory. Then moves on to an interview, with the child from the first part now an older woman, talking about her family and her life as a funambulist - a tightrope walker. The interview hides as much as it reveals. The rest of the book then swings between the older women reflecting on her life and the experience of doing that reflecting, and then back in time to the experiences she is re-living.

There's a biography being revealed, clearly. But it's also a rumination on the nature of memory and the nature of family and the possibilities of, the realities of, memory. This aspect - how it makes the reader think about how we tell our own stories - was probably, for me, the most intriguing aspect.

* There's a lot about parents here. The failures of parents and who is a parent - that it's not just about biology - and what parents can or should or can't be. What children can, should, and shouldn't know about their parents. And how all of those things (can) have an impact on children...

* There is also, unsurprisingly!, a lot about learning to walk on a tightrope. As someone who really doesn't like heights, that was both terrifying and fascinating. But it's really not the focus - it's a means to an end, really.

* Overall I enjoyed this story, although it's very much not my usual sort of thing.

A Girl Made of Air by Nadia Hetherington was thoroughly enjoyable and kept me entertained throughout. It has magical elements woven throughout its circus setting and focuses on the gritty reality of the narrators life and how they must overcome their past. The characters were memorable and the main focus of teh story.

3.5/5 ⭐️⭐️⭐️

This was an ok read for me. A historical fiction mixed with magical realism that’s set in a circus. This was a little slow paced and darker than what I was expecting but overall a good read.

This is the story of the greatest funambulist who ever lived. How she was born and raised in the circus, neglected by her parents and groomed to be a star. How she had to learn what love was and what it wasn’t. How she only learnt her own true story when it was almost too late. How she left the circus and made herself into a star without their help. How that star fell brutally and dramatically.

Yet at times it seems more to be the story of those around her. Our narrator is never named. Instead the names that stick with us are Marina (her mother), Serendipity Wilson (her mentor and closest friend), and Bunny (a girl who haunts the story from before her birth is even told). It seems to me that the unnamed narrator is telling their stories and we only learn her own story as a side-effect. Her early life at the circus revolves around Marina and Serendipity Wilson and the very different life lessons that they teach her (accidentally or on purpose). And the latter half of the book is guided by her search for Bunny and how it takes over her life in a spectacular way. By the end of the book I am left with the sad feeling that the narrator never really lived for herself at all.

The use of memories told by a first person narrator creates an immersive experience with a lot of bias. We are immersed in the life of our narrator, but the world around her is revealed to us with such a narrow focus that it is almost impossible to form any opinions of our own. For instance, she has very extreme relationships with almost all of the characters mentioned in the book but we never learn enough about those characters to really understand how they feel in return. Cubby is a good example of this. Our narrator seems both obsessed with him and indifferent, but we never learn exactly what he believes he is getting out of the relationship: love, sex, company, amusement, a front row seat to burgeoning stardom?

As the narrator is looking back there is also a lack of cohesion in some of the memories and not everything is told in the right order. This is effective in creating an air of mystery and suspense that pulled me through the plot right to the very end. It was an ending which was both expected and somehow still also a surprise and the future is left hanging very purposefully in the balance.

A Girl Made of Air by Nadia Hetherington was a slightly different kind of story from the one I'd imagined after reading the blurb, but it was no less interesting because of that. While there are some fantastical moments woven in, I think it is misleading to compare this work to that of Erin Morgenstern, as it was less magical realism and more gritty realism a lot of the time, despite the fairytales woven into the narrative and the circus setting. At its heart, this is a story of regret and trauma and finding a way to come to terms with the past. The characters were memorable and well drawn and the story moved along at a good pace, so overall it kept me turning the pages throughout. As long as you don't start this book expecting a variation of The Night Circus, you will surely find something to both enjoy and pondering within its pages.

(My review will go live on my blog and on Goodreads at the links below on 17 August. I will then also share on social media.)

When I first started reading this book, I thought that my first line would be "this book is so good that I bought it twice" but now I have finished it, my first line is "please let there be a sequel or Nydia, please write some more amazing books". I bought this book on Kindle a while ago but also requested it on NetGalley, having forgotten I'd bought it. I'm not regretting it at all.

If you love books about the circus (Circus of Wonders by Elizabeth Macneal or Nights at the Circus by Angela Carter) then you should love this book. I've realised that the main character doesn't have a name per se, but is called Mouse by one of her fellow performers Serendipity. Mouse doesn't have an easy life, her mother gives birth to her but doesn't really look after her. Her pseudo-mother Serendipity raises her and teaches her the art of tightrope-walking or a funambulist. It takes off from there.

The book is told in the past tense, bits written down but collated into a story. It all ties up beautifully in the end.

I do hope for a sequel.