This book was incredible to read. The fliw was great, the social media and art bits intentional and well paced, and the emotional dynamic between the characters had my emotions on a roller coaster. One criticism I could make is this book was almost impossible to read through the tears it put in my eyes.

Heavy topics. Good writing. Good story. It was. good read though sad, but it was interesting to read from this perspective.

Accurate and fantastic OCD rep. I need to be in a better place mentally to finish, but I’m thankful the author wrote this.

Triger Warning-Mental Health, Self Harm and Suicide.

Wow, wow wow. I really don't have many words right now to describe the book, because I'm still recovering from it. This is an emotional read and I'm still processing it. This was beautifully written and handled so many topics with grace and heartfelt emotions.

Thank you so much to NetGalley and the Publisher for the ARC

Heartfelt and raw. I devoured this book in one day – I truly could not bring myself to put it down. The characterization was stunning. The language was rich. The message was pitch-perfect. The romance was real. Wow. What a story.

Three months after the Night on the Bathroom Floor, high school junior Lily Larkin feels like her life is falling apart. Because it is.

On the Night on the Bathroom Floor Lily found her older sister Alice hurting herself. Alice hasn't been home since. And Lily has been struggling to fill all of the Alice-shaped gaps she left behind.

If Lily can do enough at home, get good enough grades at school, make it to State in track, get into UC Berkeley, and keep doing everything right it will all be okay. Her family needs a win and all Lily has to do is keep winning.

Except Lily feels like she's starting to lose it. She's uninspired, overwhelmed, and struggling to hide all of it from her family and her friends.

When she's partnered with a new student who knows all about the Night on the Bathroom Floor, Lily is worried Micah Mendez will reveal all of her family's secrets. Instead, he might be the one person who can help Lily find her way back to herself in The Words We Keep (2022) by Erin Stewart.

Find it on Bookshop.

Lily and her family (and most secondary characters) are presumed white. Micah is Mexican American.

The Words We Keep is Stewart's second novel and I wish I could recommend but I can't. Read on for a discussion of some of the issues I had with this book including spoilers:

I want to start by saying that problematic elements in a book in no way imply that the author shares these beliefs or is pushing a similar agenda. That said, I found enough concerns that The Words We Keep is not a book I would recommend to anyone without explaining the flaws in the story--things that I felt even more important to point out as the book has received overwhelmingly positive reviews from professional review sources.

In a note at the end of the novel Stewart talks about a lot of Lily's anxiety disorder and how its portrayal comes directly from Stewart's own lived experience. Assuming best intentions on the part of the author, my guess is that in translating her own history with anxiety as a teen, Stewart failed to factor in changes to best practices for dealing with mental illness, changing attitudes toward mental health, or how either of those things would be handled in a modern school setting. Not to mention changing social norms therein.

The book opens with Lily finding her older sister, Alice, in the bathroom after Alice has tried to kill herself. Alice is sent away to a mental health center for treatment where she is diagnosed as bipolar. Alice is in college at the time although she had come home during her first semester needing "a break." After all of this the family tells no one and claims Alice is taking time off from college. No one at Lily's school knows about the trauma. There is no aspect of counseling or therapy for the family--not even Lily who found her sister before their father rushed Alice to the hospital.

Three months after the incident Alice comes home early from treatment. There is no visible support or guidance from the mental health facility or Alice's medical team except vague comments that she is on an assortment of medications and going to therapy (something she wants to stop when it is not working which becomes a subplot of the book). Alice's father and step-mother have no guidance for themselves or for Lily and younger sister Margot on how to handle the situation and best support Alice while she re-adjusts.

Lily and her classmates have intense stigmas attached to mental illness. When Micah, who eventually becomes Lily's love interest, is first introduced the classroom gossip mill starts spreading rumors about him almost immediately as everyone knows he spent time at a mental health facility. Everyone, including Lily at first, refers to him as "Manic Micah" and constantly wonder if he will "lose it" and freak out on classmates. Lily is further concerned that Micah will reveal the secret that Alice as at the same facility. This thread is interrogated a bit as Lily gets to know Micah but it takes half the book for that to start to happen or for Lily to realize she is part of the problem.

A lot of these themes with mental health are developed and explored as Alice finds a treatment plan that works. Lily's anxiety is diagnosed and she begins her own therapy and learning better ways to cope than self-harm which is her main coping strategy for much of the book often in the form of scratching herself until she bleeds.

I'd be willing to chalk a lot of the above up to writerly choices but the book, unfortunately, repeatedly features casual transphobia.

Lily makes a point of describing Alice pre-Night-on-the-Bathroom-Floor as loud and exuberant with big, long hair and a penchant for bright colors. When Alice comes home Lily is distressed to find that Alice has changed leading to the remark that "Her hair is short. Boy short." which (I hope) is intended as an offhand descriptor but is also extremely heteronormative and falls into a distressing pattern of transphobic comments from the characters as even the possibility of nonbinary or trans identities is erased or dismissed without interrogation from any of the main characters.

Lily's younger sister Margot is ten-years-old and currently obsessed with Harry Potter. She is reading their mother's old books that she found storage and deep enough in the fandom to dress in wizard robes and also wonder if Alice is dealing with her own figurative Dementors (trying to suck out of her joy). Consequently references to Harry Potter are an undercurrent throughout the story that feels unnecessary--particularly in 2022 with more and more examples of JKR's political leanings as deeply transphobic. (Read more about my current feelings on Harry Potter here: We need to talk about J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter, and why it's time to say goodbye to both.) Aside from that, Harry Potter is twenty years old making it a dated reference that, again, points to a lack of attention to modern teen life.

The book's main plot involves Lily and Micah working together as "guerrilla poets" leaving affirming poetry around their school and neighborhood anonymously. Lily gets the idea for the project after she pastes a collage poem on the back of a stall in one of the girls' restrooms at her school which leads to what I could only interpret as a transphobic conversation between Lily and her academic rival, Kali, who is trying to discern the identity of the anonymous poet. When Micah asks how Kali knows the poet is a girl her immediate reply is "Because it's in the girls' bathroom." Intentions aside, I can't see any way to read this as anything but alarmingly unaware of recent anti-LGBTQ+ legislation and, again, transphobic. Honestly, when there are literal bills about bathrooms (read more about them here: 4 Big Problems With Anti-Trans Bathroom Bills – and How You Can Help) I'm not sure how this conversation even made it to print.

Readers familiar with YA literature might recognize the similarities in plot (and cover and title) to Every Last Word by Tamara Ireland Stone from 2015. Main character Samantha is dealing with OCD rather than the anxiety that Lily learns to manage but the plot and theme of finding solace in poetry remain similar for readers looking for a comparable title that requires fewer caveats.

Possible Pairings: Madness by Zac Brewer, Finding Audrey by Sophie Kinsella, When We Collided by Emery Lord, Baby & Solo by Lisabeth Posthuma, Every Last Word by Tamara Ireland Stone, Words on Bathroom Walls by Julia Walton

*An advance copy of this title was provided by the publisher for review consideration.

The characters and their reactions were authentic. I loved the use of poetry and art as outlets for thinking and healing. A well-rounded view of the effect mental illness has on the individual and those around them.

The Words We Keep takes an honest, raw look at mental illness in teens. It shares the journey of three teens who struggle with different types of mental illness in a way that invites teens to examine their own anxieties and deal with them. I love all the characters within its pages but I really identify with protagonist Lily Larkin, the perfect sister, daughter and athlete that struggles with her own demons she dares not share with others. Her journey towards self acceptance and healing is one I think most teens can identify with. Although there are a few areas of some steamy teenage angst, I would be comfortable putting it in my classroom library as well as recommending it for the school library. I would recommend it to students who I know are struggling and I believe they would feel a connection to the authenticity that I think other youth mental illness novels lack. This my friends was a book that kept me on my toes and made me have all the feels. Agh, so sad its over!

I loved this book. Mental health can be such a tricky thing to write. The perspective can come off to wild or boring. But this author found a good medium while addressing certain mental health stigmas. This book is an enjoyable heart breaking read.

It is three months after Lily found her sister Alice on the bathroom floor, severely bleeding after she cut herself andAlice is sent to a mentall illness facility to recover. With her sister away from home, Lily is trying desperately to keep everything at home together.
But then Micah enters her classroom. He was in the same treatment center as Alice, and knows about her illness. She is assigned to a school art project with him. Micah and Lily talk a lot about Micah's troubles and the illness of Alice, especially when Alica comes home again and makes Lily face her own issues, which are compulsions that she can't ignore and that grown stronger and more problematic during the story. Alice seems a shell of her former self. As her mood improves Lily learns her sister stopped taking her meds just as Lily and Micah grow closer. Both Lily and Alice's mental issues grow bigger until a dramatic event in the end.

This is not an easy and light fun read. This is a young adult novel that handles serious mentall illness as bipolar disorder. It certainly took me a while to get into the story. Some parts where interesting, but somehow the story itself dragged a bit. The lighter '"side story'' was the guerilla poetry project Lily and Micah where working on, everyone in their high school is wondering where this poetry is coming from and no on expects it is Lily and Micah. The book also deals with the stigma around mentall illness, as people in their class slowly get to know Micah's past and he is bullied. It is a story of coping, grief, family, friendship and acceptance. Not the very strongest storyline, but overall its and okay read.

The Words We Keep by Erin Stewart, 400 pages. Delacorte Press (Random House), 2022. $19.
Language: R (42 swears, 0 “f”); Mature Content: PG13; Violence: PG13
BUYING ADVISORY: HS - OPTIONAL
AUDIENCE APPEAL: HIGH
The illusion of her put-together life started to slip when Lily’s sister Alice (18yo) attempted suicide. Since then, Lily (16yo) has found evidence that she might also be losing her mind and is determined not to let anyone else see those cracks. But the secret of Alice’s suicide attempt is getting harder to keep – and the secret of Lily’s questionable mental state isn’t far behind.
Stewart addresses difficult topics of mental health, suicide, and the stigmas surrounding the individuals and families who deal with these struggles through Lily’s experiences. The pressure of “normal” that weighs on us actually takes away from being our beautiful selves. Lily’s story is raw, and I loved watching her poetry express her highs and lows. While the ending wraps up too nicely and happily to reflect reality in dealing with mental health struggles, I love the hope it offers readers that things will not always be hard. There are struggles to find a way forward again and a reason to live after getting to the point of wanting to die, but it’s worth it. As Lily says, “the world could use more weirdos” – that includes you and me no matter what we are struggling with.
Lily and her family are implied white, and the main male character, Micah, is implied Hispanic. The mature content rating is for innuendo; self-medicating; partial nudity; and mentions of drugs, penises, orgasms, sexting, and sex. The violence rating is for blood, self-harm, attempted suicide, and discussions of suicide.
Reviewer: Carolina Herdegen

📓 “And when you love someone, you love all the broken pieces, right? Or maybe when you love someone, those pieces don’t seem so broken anymore. They’re just part of them.”
Erin Stewart

📓 The book follows Lily Larkin who is trying to keep it all together since the night on the bathroom floor when she found her elder sister Alice hurting herself and asking for help. But she wasn’t able to help her. Now Alice is in rehab and Lily is trying hard to fight her inner monsters. She can’t ask for help either because she is the PERFECT daughter and is not supposed to let down her father. While working on a project for scholarship she meets Micah who happens to know Alice from rehab. But Micah has fears of his own. Will they both be able to fight their inner monsters and win the competition? And what will happen when Alice will be back in the scene?

📓 This was my second book of month on the topic of mental health. It took me few chapters to get hold of the book but once I did I was able to relate with the character of Lily. This book will take you into the mind of Lily suffering from anxiety disorder and how she tries to cope with it by writing words of the day and poetry in her journal and sometimes by even hurting herself.
📌 Just behind my ribs deep by my heart,
lies a trove of words unspoken
I hide my scars, too, because no one wants to see the truth that is me
Will they want to stay if they see the wounds and hear
All the words I keep?

📓 I loved the author’s style of writing and how she talks about anxiety disorder. The best thing about this book was that if it talks about depression and suicidal thoughts, it will teach you acceptance too that you are enough the way you are and there is no shame in asking for help. And then this book has this heart warming love story between two craziest people you will have ever seen.

📓 A must read. Do look into the TRIGGER WARNINGS if you plan on reading this one. And trust me YOU WON’T REGRET. Thankyou NetGalley for an eARC.

Review:
(I apologize in advance for it being all over the place)
Plot:
Well, the plot includes mental health as a major major focus and romance as a minor minor focus, so that's a plus. Look, I love a good romance novel, but I do not like it when authors go all oh, you have a mental health issue, you know what'd help you? A boyfriend. Thankfully, this was not the case here, and that's a green flag.

Characters:
Lily is amazing. I see myself in her a bit and I am just like- girl you get me. And I was so so happy to see Alice's arc! And Micah's! And Margot is the cutest, honestly. They're all amazing. Just read the novel, you'll see what I mean.

Writing Style (including the poems):
Three words: Infinite chef's kisses.

Guys, just read this novel. Just read it. You won't regret it.

[short review]
By turns painfully real and softly hopeful, The Words We Keep is a striking exploration of the effects of mental illness not just on an individual, but on an entire family. It addresses the pervasiveness of mental health struggles across all types of individuals–social butterflies, high-achieving academic types, and nonconformist artists. And it does so through the eyes of anxious girl doing her best not to come unraveled even as her world seems to be falling apart around her. I couldn’t get over how much this story resonated with my own memories of high school and college–through those years of my life, so much of this main character’s experience could have been my own–and I sincerely hope this book is picked up by students working their way through high school today, as the stakes and anxieties have only gotten higher the past few years.

[full review]
Do you ever read a book and just go, “Dang, this author must have ripped some of this from my actual life,” because it speaks so closely to your own experiences? Because that was completely my response to this book. Lily’s high school experience tracked my own so closely, it almost hurt. An overachieving type-A student? Check. Aspiring poet who uses words to vent her anxieties but is afraid of sharing them? Check. Attempting to deny mental health problems out of fear that you’ll disappoint others, fail to achieve ultimate success in college admissions, and/or make someone else’s life harder? Check, check, and check. While Lily’s problems escalated far more quickly than my own did–and she was able to address them far sooner as a result–seeing the depths of her pain and struggles still really hit home. I also found a lot of relatable points from Lily’s sister Alice as well–the difficulty of being on medications that don’t work correctly, the awkwardness when people want to tiptoe around your mental health problems instead of just addressing them. And I really, really appreciated the infusion of art and poetry into the story, and using that art to speak to the broader anxieties, even the non-clinical ones, that plague students everywhere. I think the world could use some more guerilla poets.

One of the things I’ve seen some people complain about with this book is that Lily is often self-centered and not very likable. The thing is, that’s kind of the point. Anxiety can turn your brain into a sort of tunnel vision, and you get so preoccupied with your own problems that you start to forget other things that should be important, and to neglect your relationships as a result. (Side note: Lily’s best friend Sam deserves an award for being so unflappable and awesome.) The author actually captures amazingly the degree of thought-spiraling Lily experiences, using a series of crossed-out words every time Lily is trying to disregard a
fear she’s going crazy
anxiety about her future
thought. This constant self-revision and denial of serious problems for the sake of appearances is a very real problem that people with severe anxiety face. I’ve faced it myself, and still sometimes do. This sometimes-selfish, often-flawed thinking made Lily relatable and realistic. It’s not surprising that the author is able to articulate this experience so well–as she explains in an author’s note at the end of the book, she herself has had serious struggles with anxiety, and this book was written in large part for her teenage self.

A tiny thing I appreciated was a nod to the “have you tried yoga?” question that so many mentally ill people face. It was handled in a way that, despite being such a small part of the book, actually showed a good deal of nuance.

I really only had one small issue with this book, which was a specific aspect of the romance in it. While I did like the characters and their relationships as a whole (for real, I love seeing a supportive couple–and I appreciate that the boy with dark hair and a traumatic past is actually not a douchebag), there were some comments near the end that felt a little weird to me. Without spoiling much, I’ll just say that after spending so much of the book focused on family, it felt strange to prioritize the romance over everything else.

Finally, I do want to stress that this is not a light read. It deals with very heavy subjects in significant detail, and readers should definitely note the trigger and content warnings. That said, it is also a tremendously important read, and I think confronting the harsh realities of mental illness is a crucial step toward reducing stigma and encouraging people to seek help. This book is raw. It is real. It is powerful, complex, and utterly important. I’m certainly glad I read it–and I sincerely hope others will pick it up too.

The Words We Keep is a story of hope, fear, and understanding. Lily witnessed her sister, Alice, attempt to kill herself, and since the incident, the voices inside her own head get progressively worse and worse. She doesn't understand what is happening to her and wonders if she is "crazy" as well. When her and Micah are paired together for a poetry/art project, she starts to feel alive again, like her words matter. And then she falls apart.

Teenage anxiety is real and it is important to know that it shows up in a variety of ways. The characters in this story are realistic, honest, and show a true side of mental health. This is such an important read and an eye opener into depression, anxiety, and teen mental health.

Overachieving, alway perfect Lily has been going through her own mind struggles after finding her sister, Alice, in the midst of a mental health breakdown that landed her in a facility for several months. The pressure to always succeed and cause no issues wears on Lily in ways that no one sees. Enter Micah--a boy who knows Alice, battles his own demons, and sees the parts of Lily she hides away from everyone else. Together, they work on a project to unleash words and images the world needs to see and share.

Erin Stewart carefully maneuvers a difficult topic that needs a spotlight shone on it. She is able to fully immerse the reader in the feelings of a person struggling with anxiety through her use of writing and then hiding Lily's innermost thoughts, Alice's slipping into different phases of bipolar, and a tough look at depression through Micah's story.

Trigger Warning: Mental Health (BiPolar Disorder/Depression/Anxiety/OCD), Self-Harm, Suicide

This book is beautiful. Erin Stewart knows how to tug at your heartstrings. The mental health representation hit close to home as bipolar disorder and anxiety runs in both my family and my husbands.

The writing was well developed in a way that makes you feel what the characters are feeling. It was so poetic. Although this book dives deep into mental health you can still find the lightness in the dialogue between Lily and Micah. I loved the banter they had with each other.

Each character was well defined and played an important part in putting the pieces of this family back together after trauma.

I definitely recommend this one to anyone looking for a YA contemporary with beautiful writing around mental health, trauma, family dynamics, and a tough of romance.

This wonderful Contemporary Young Adult managed to conquer me from the first page, so much so that i completed the reading in just one day. The author with her smooth, delicate and engaging style managed to make me passionate about the story told without ever losing interest. This was certainly not an easy reading given also the strong themes dealt with. In this novel, so realistic and current, in fact, the author has decided to talk about Bullying, Panic Attacks, Anxiety, Depression and Bipolar Disorder, problems that increasingly affect young people, and which unfortunately, despite being in 2022, are still seen like taboo. The protagonist of this book is Lily, a character I immediately felt in tune with.
Ever since her sister Alice attempted suicide, Lily relives that moment over and over and feels guilty for not being able to help her and for not understanding her illness in time. Having to pretend both inside and outside the house that nothing has happened and that things will fall into place again is wearing her down. Lily feels totally overwhelmed by this situation and with her increasingly frequent panic attacks, she fears she might go crazy and have something wrong with her sister. When Alice is discharged after several months, Lily no longer knows how to communicate with her, the girl in front of her now seems to be a stranger. And as much as he tries to re-establish a dialogue with her, Lily fears that their relationship is now lost forever.

However, the arrival of Micah in his life will be able to bring back some light in this darkness of his. From the first meeting Lily was immediately struck by this boy so different from those known so far, with his eccentric clothes and bright colors, and with his way of doing so particular. A guy who doesn't seem to care at all about the judgment and negative comments of others. Micah and Lily couldn't be more different. Lily needs to have everything under control, she is very precise and knows what she wants. Micah, on the other hand, is a very sensitive and fragile boy who lives for the day without making plans, with a great artistic talent thanks to which he was able to face his depression. Thanks to his help, Lily will be able to regain the desire to write and for the first time she will feel free to finally be herself. Micah will push her to try new things, to let go and get involved, or as he likes to say "to color outside the lines". But above all he will understand that not always being perfect is not synonymous with failure. I loved Lily and Micah and their story so authentic and unique, that we will gradually see it blossom page after page.

I can only recommend to everyone the reading of "The words we keep", an incredible and moving young adult who will manage to get straight to the heart.

If you are looking for a story with a raw but relatable representation of mental illness then I think you would enjoy this book. The Words We Keep has a raw but relatable story about mental illness and how the stigma society has surrounding mental health issues affects people that are struggling and keeps so many people from getting help. The Words We Keep has one of the most relatable portrayals of depression I've ever read!

I was eager to read more from Erin Stewart after she wowed me with her debut, Scars Like Wings, and I was blown away. Once again, Stewart took me on an emotional journey that was sometimes painful, but ultimately, hopeful.

This story was very emotional. The book’s central focus was mental health. I greatly appreciated the way Stewart tackled it from all angles. She addressed the stigma, loving someone who is mentally ill, as well as struggling with ones own mental health issues. The approach was unflinchingly honest, but handled with care.

This story was relatable. As someone who grapples with depression and anxiety, I found this story really resonated with me. I especially felt a connection to Micah who described his depression in the exact same way I would. It’s comforting to know there is someone out there who genuinely understands your struggle.

Though this book tackled weighty topics, there were lots of bright spots to enjoy. One of the standout parts of this story was the poetry and art created by Lily and Micah. It was such a great example of different ways one can channel their pain and let their truth be known. There was also a bit of a fun storyline that accompanied the poetry. Additionally, I loved the outlet that Lily’s sister found. Showing the therapeutic benefits of creative endeavors was a plus for me.

Overall: An extremely affecting tale focusing on mental health issues that made my heart ache, break, and warm. Another stellar book from Stewart!