What an interesting book! An incredibly detailed story touching on emotions, relationships and where you are from. The insight into how it can be so difficult to leave a place, even if you aren’t sure it is the best place for you. The growth of the characters over time and the development of their relationships is breathtaking. A story about hope, heartbreak and finding happiness when things are tough.

Maren’s mother left through her small door when Maren was a child. Now Maren has a door, an opportunity to leave for the unknown and never come back. But Maren, who was raised by her grandmother, needs her. Will Maren take the door and leave everything she knows and loves for the unknown or will she push through a difficult time with the ones that she loves?

As I read through the book I felt for Maren and all that she was going through. Many times I questioned what I would do if I were in her position. Would I stick out the difficult times or escape them to the unknown? An incredible book that makes you question everything that you know.

Thank you Netgalley for my advanced reader copy!

Thanks for the opportunity to read this book. I found the underlying story in this book to be fascinating and gripping. The magical realism of the door seemed to be a disruption to the story itself. I will not be reviewing it on my blog since I only do positive reviews. Another reader who likes the supernatural better than I do might really enjoy the book. I did find it compelling enough to read to the end.

Many thanks to NetGalley and Sourcebooks Landmark for gifting me a digital copy of this wonderful book by Ashley Blooms - 5 stars!

In Appalachian country, where poverty and drugs are rampant, Maren is trying to be good. She's trying to avoid the path her mother took, take care of her grandmother, go to school for a better life. Maren doesn't want to sell her grandmother's pills for money, adding trouble to the already troubled area. But life is hard and the chips always seem to be stacked against her. Legends of doors that appear to people in town are real to Maren - her mother walked through her door when Maren was young and never came back, leaving her to be raised by her grandmother. When a little door appears to Maren, she has to decide whether to walk through hers or stay.

A beautifully-written magical realism book that tackles deep subjects in a way that brings them even closer to the reader. You can see how people get stuck and don't see a way out of their lives. The author doesn't portray these people as "bad" people, but rather puts a face to the problem and makes you feel the difficulties faced by each of these characters. You feel the resiliency and the need, you feel the pull of family and friends and wanting to do the right thing. I could picture Maren's beautiful door, feel its pull, and didn't want this book to end!

This beautifully wrought novel was challenging to read because ‘magical realism’ is not something I’m usually comfortable with. That being said, Maren’s story was compelling and really pulled at my heartstrings.

“Houses dotting the hillside like wary creatures crouched between trees. Sterns was pretty from a distance, but I’d only ever seen it up close”.

The setting, a mountain community in rural Kentucky, added flavor to the narrative. The community, like a lot of America, is suffering via the opioid epidemic, and the fact that Maren is forced to resort to add to the suffering of her friends and neighbors is heart-wrenching.

The inter-dimensional doors in the novel were ambiguous and thought-provoking. Were they a decision to commit suicide? were they a magical portal to escape a wretched life? were they hope? a choice? does going through these doors symbolize a beginning, or an ending?

It is a novel that depicts the very real struggle that many have to endure. The everyday battle to keep going when hope is elusive and opportunities are few. Themes of responsibility, socio-economic limitations, addiction, self-doubt, disappointment, desperation, and mental illness permeate the story.

The writing itself was quite beautiful – and the novel was not without some humor. “There’s a family tree that would be better as a table”.

One thing I do know is that Maren Walker and her story are memorable. Though anyone who has trouble connecting to novels that have attributes of magical realism should probably give this a miss, I must say that for me it struck a chord on an emotional level. The characters and setting were portrayed with such empathy that I feel I can heartily recommend “Where I Can’t Follow“.

Maren Walker is overwhelmed. She dropped out of college when her Granny, who raised her, became ill, she's got huge debt, and she's working a marginal hourly job. Her BFF Julie is off her meds. And then the little door appears. People in Blackdamp County have been seeing doors for years and some chose to go through them. Marn's mother did, leaving behind a daughter who will come to understand what happened. The door follows Maren, taunting her, even as she must cope with her grandmother's increasing dementia. She finds herself working with her childhood friend Carver to sell Granny's pain pills to keep them afloat. This is filled with magical realism (wait til the blue flowers appear). It's a rough read in spots- Maren's in such a bad place both literally and figuratively but what does the door mean? I was a fan of Blooms' first novel and this was equally well plotted and written. You know Maren isn't going to choose the door but ...Thanks to Netgalley for the ARC. It's a good read.

Where I Can’t Follow by Ashley Blooms has an intriguing premise. In the community of Blackdamp County in Kentucky, ‘doors’ have appeared for generations to people. Only those who get a door can see it and walk through it if they wish. What happens when one walks through the door is not explored, however, the tension of whether one should take the door and walk into an unknown life, hoping it to be better than the current situation, is looked at through an emotional and personal lens.

Maren Walker is a young girl living with her grandmother. Her mother, Nell, walked through her door when Maren was nine, and life has not been easy. Her grandma has started to develop dementia, schooling can no longer be a priority and all her time goes to work. She isn’t making enough money to support her education and her grandma’s health. On top of that, there is trauma and feelings of abandonment since her mom left. These are things they don’t talk about at home anymore.

As Maren struggles to make ends meet while balancing her grandma’s wishes of keeping her illness a secret from the rest of the family, Maren’s very own door appears. She starts to think about her mom and wants to learn about what happened and why she left. In revisiting her mother’s old friends, she starts to remember the past in a new light. Where I Can’t Follow tries to tackle many hard questions including what it means to keep going, why we behave the way we do towards our kids, what being in control means and how we face adversities in life.

Maren has an engaging point of view. She is young but she is very well aware of the mistakes her mother made and the expectations her grandma has of her actions. She is a loving granddaughter who would do anything to keep her grandma happy. I loved her relationship with Julie, who is practically her soul sister. They know when something is up with the other person and though they are still figuring out to read each other and trust each other when times are tough, their childhood friendship is a key relationship in the book. Carver and Maren’s relationship speaks to the early years of adulthood when people are still figuring themselves out while figuring out each other. I found them to be sweet and would have actually liked to see their romance develop more.

While it is heartbreaking to read about a young woman supporting her grandmother and giving her school to make money, those are the realities for a lot of people. The unfairness of the situation does not make it disappear and though Maren’s story, I learned a lot. Ashley Blooms does not shy away from exposing this reality to the reader. The world she creates is a harsh one with tough situations. Where I Can’t Follow wasn’t the book I imagined it to be about. For someone looking for a literary fiction that addresses hard themes like living paycheque to paycheque and what it means to be a young caregiver, this book is a thought provoking read. From other reviews I have read on Goodreads, for example, the one by Kelly Ward, the book represents life in Appalachia well. I personally do not know much about the area or community and cannot speak to the accuracy in this review.

Where I Can’t Follow made me wonder from the synopsis as well as the storyline itself about the metaphor that the door represents. The way the characters and the world is set up, the door is an escape, an unknown potential to be a lot better than what the present is. It could also be seen as symbolising death because once someone passes through their door, no one ever hears from them again. Through Maren and the experiences of the people who have interacted with doors, Where I Can’t Follow beautifully portrays the tug of war between wanting to go and being unable to leave. Life isn’t supposed to be a plateau, it has its ups and downs. This book explores what makes life worth it and the role relationships and support systems play in everyday living, no matter how hard everyday living may be.

Where I Can’t Follow is such a lovely book. Its blend of literary realism with magical touches creates a vivid, engrossing world that pulls readers in and holds them close while the narrative plays out.

Blooms writes frankly and evocatively about the struggles inherent to contemporary Appalachian life without pandering to the gaze of readers who expect to wallow in the trauma and poverty of people other than themselves. Her descriptions of characters and settings resist objectification, insisting that readers view Maren, Julie, Carver, Iris, and everyone else around them (with, perhaps, the exceptions of Julie’s disastrous girlfriend, Rachel, and the truly horrid local police) as complex individuals rather than tired archetypes. This is one of only books I’ve ever read about Appalachia that I’d feel comfortable sharing with someone who grew up there.

I’d recommend this novel to anyone who has ever struggled with the tensions between home and growth, between acting responsibly toward others and saving some care for oneself, between protecting one’s heart and learning to let love take root.

I received a free e-ARC of this title from the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for my review.

A truly touching and wonderful novel that includes a thread of speculative fiction. Ashley Blooms paints a realistic vision of Appalachia (Blackdamp County, Kentucky), and a heroine that you can't help but root for.

Maren Walker, needs to find a solution. She can no longer work full time at the country store and take care of her Grammy who is showing signs of dementia. Her best friend suggests selling Grammy's prescription pills and the situation is so dire, Maren is so poor, and Ashley Bloom is such a talented writer, that this seems like a reasonable decision.

Woven within the tale, we learn that the inhabitants of this small town are gifted with a choice - many of them receive a door - an actual door -suspended in the air that only they can see. There is neither rhyme nor reason as to when or why and it's only available for a limited time. If you choose to take the door, you are never seen again so it's unknown where these doors lead. In the past, people threw parties for the gift of the door, all the while trying to make the very difficult decision on whether they will go through. Maren's own mother left her for the door and Maren wonders what choice she would make. I love this speculative elements and the metaphor for giving up on the complicated issues of generational poverty.

As we meet more members of this close knit and memorable community, Maren's situation because more dire. The question is - what will she do to save her only family?

If you love a story about Appalachia, generational poverty, speculative fiction, hope and transcendent writing, then Where I can't Follow is for you! #Netgalley #WhereICantFollow #Sourcebooks #Landmarkfiction

I was looking forward to reading this book set in my home state of Kentucky, but the writing felt too juvenile and cheesy.

Loved this gentle, poetic, eerie book about a woman processing her trauma and navigating her circumstances and also just doing her damn best. Ashley Blooms does setting better than anyone, and the fantasy elements woven into the Kentucky landscape here are so evocative (and often sweet-yet-creepy, as with the blue flowers). I loved Maren's own descriptions of her self-doubt and anxiety and depression as a "fog," and I also loved her conversations with her loved ones – the ones where both parties were honest, and where Maren's loved ones often called her out on her own shit. This is a very honest book, and I would recommend it.

I received an eARC from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

Life is just harder for some, especially if your mother disappears when you are a child and your grandmother raises you. Now money is scarce, grandma has dementia, drug use is rampant around you and you feel any choices you may have had in life are slipping away. This novel takes a sympathetic look at the reality of poverty and reasons some turn to drugs. The characters feel real and the Appalachian setting comes alive. Truly a book about hope and strength of community.

Thanks to NetGalley and Sourcebooks Landmark for the ARC to read and review.

What I love about Ashley Blooms writing is that it combines two of my favorites; fantastical fiction with Appalachian literature. I was blown away by her first book Every Bone A Prayer because of the way she was able to convey the way abuse; especially sexual abuse, must feel to the victim. She used speculative elements so deftly to show how victims feel like a stranger in their own skin.

In Where I Can't Follow, Blooms again uses the portal fantasy to make readers ponder how drug use and desperation in a small Kentucky town leads its citizens to look for a way out of a future that only seems bleak. What if we all had a door we could take? What would be on the other side and would it be better than the current reality?

Ashley Blooms' books aren't easy reads; there are tons of heavy issues buried among the magical elements but in some ways the magic makes me want to keep reading and not turn away from what sometimes feels like an emotionally brutal story. And if you want a book that gives you a strong sense of place, Where I Can't Follow one hundred percent hits the mark. I have lived in Appalachia for several periods of my life and I recognize the people and places she writes about. These feel like people I've known and places I've been.

Bravo on another thoughtful and imaginative book.

5 stars

This is a moving, powerful piece of speculative fiction set in the Appalachian hills. Though it’s not a particularly long book, I found myself taking my time moving through it, letting each page unfold in due time. The language is just beautiful, and the characters both raw, real, and somehow elevated.

This is perhaps the best depiction of depression I’ve read in a long time, if ever. I found that I completely understood Maren’s feelings of hopelessness and worthlessness. Even having been there myself, in many books a character’s depression is described in a way that makes it seem strangely other from themselves, a demon we wish they could just throw off their backs; and yet, even with the depression being described metaphorically as Maren’s ‘fog,’ I still understood and felt the way it was ingrained in her, and empathized with Maren’s mindset even as I wished for better things for her.

The doors are an obvious metaphor, but that doesn’t take away from their power. They work so well, are used so well, are crafted so well; I neither found myself yearning for more information nor feeling like they were over-explained.

At its core, this is a book about choice and autonomy: about the need human beings have for self-determination, for good or ill, and the fact that that very autonomy doesn’t mean not having the support of a community of kin. This was beautifully and very carefully imparted.

I cannot recommend this book highly enough, as a piece of very literary, very speculative, and very accessible, relatable fiction.

I received a copy of this book from NetGalley in exchange for my honest review.

Wow. This was my first book by this author, and I was so impressed. What a beautiful and unique writing style. It takes true talent to be able to write about light and dark subject matter.

This was a book that i feel like a lot of people can relate to and understand. definitely check it out.

This was such an emotional but beautiful story. It was incredibly well-written to where I could not put it down. A real page turner. I could connect deeply with the character, and I could understand what each person was going through. I would definitely recommend this book.

There is no flinching away from the difficult subject matter. It is there, deftly woven with threads of fabulism, that reveal an all too familiar picture of suicide, substance abuse, and poverty.

Blooms has an extraordinary amount of empathy. With a few words that reveal some of the darkest, most hopeless parts of humanity, the reader is left with only deep understanding and compassion.

This is a hard book, but it is also beautiful in that it enters into these struggles and can still emerge with whispers of hope.

I loved the author's first book but I didn't enjoy this one. I stopped reading it at 30%. I tried to try again and still did not enjoy it.

I received a complimentary copy of this book. Opinions expressed in this review are completely my own. I enjoyed this book, the plot was interesting and I really liked the characters. The descriptions in the book were also very well written.

This novel is set in contemporary rural Appalachia. Maren, the main character, is struggling to care for her grandmother, who has dementia, while the bills are racking up and they sink further into debt. There are so many issues explored in this book: mental illness, drug addiction, family, love, friendship. It's obviously quite dark at times, and yet Blooms manages to bring in the light as well, lifting the suffocating feeling of desperation and giving some hope for her characters. The writing is beautiful, and Blooms's descriptions are especially well done. I really cared about Maren and her choices, and I kept rooting for her even when she made mistakes. Blooms uses a slight fantasy element in the novel, in that certain people in the area have little doors unexpectedly appear in their lives, which they can either use, disappearing forever, or dismiss. Maren's own mother chose to go through her door when Maren was a child, so there's plenty to unpack when Maren finds a door of her own. I loved the idea of these doors and the varied descriptions of them, as well as the depth this device gave to the story. I will definitely be reading Blooms's earlier novel and eagerly await whatever she writes next. Thanks to NetGalley and Sourcebooks Landmark Publishing for a digital review copy.

4.5 stars!

Walk through the door and leave all your problems behind...but you don't know what's on the other side. And once you leave, you'll never come back. Will you go through?

Maren Walker has a lot going on. She doesn't make much money, her grandmother is sick, her friend is spiraling, and she doesn't know what to do with her life. Everyone knows that when your door appears, you have a choice to make; take the door and leave your problems behind, or stay and try to make things work. What will Maren do?

This book was amazing! The cover really doesn't do the story justice. I knew there would be magical realism here, but the cover made me think of more fluff and less grit, which this story has much more grit than expected. Maren and her loved ones are quite poor, and options are few. She really wants more for her life, but many external factors, as well as internal ones, hold her back. Maren's mother took the chance to walk through her door when Maren was nine, and it's affected her life ever since, so when her door appears, the dilemma begins.

I loved the relationships in this book. They felt very real and included pain along with the happy moments. At times the characters were frustrating, especially Maren's best friend, but it felt very true to life. This was very thought-provoking as I kept wondering if I'd take my door if I ever had one. I highly recommend this book!