This is the kind of book that earned its rating from the beginning but didn't keep it up. And yet, the story got me so hard, I can't imagine it getting anything less than 4 stars.

Sally has an older sister, or used to have one, but she never stopped loving Kathy. Now she writes her sister telling everything she couldn't really, even before she was gone.

I cried. This book has its big moments you could call tearjerkers but it is a book that gives you that knot the whole read. Of course you'll get to laugh, you get to feel angry, jealous, nostalgic, hopeful. But the feeling of something heavy on Sally's chest follows you. And that's what this is, her trying to get rid of this weight. Unfortunately, we have to carry it with her until the end.

As I mentioned, I loved the beginning and then it wasn't so great. It wasn't bad, it was probably good but the first... third, maybe, of the book was so extremely good, it paled in comparison. So i'll recommnd this to people who enjoy books you'll see the character grow, you'll follow their story without expecting any big event—there are, but it's better not to have expectations.

It is a beautiful story nonetheless. The way Kathy basically grows in front of our eyes, how her family needs to face that their other daughter isn't there anymore but one is still with them. This book is about grief and especially about people doing their best to overcome it.

I hope I can read more works Alison Espach, I loved her style her storytelling.


Honest review based on an ARC provided by Netgalley. Many thanks to the publisher for this opportunity.

#NotesonYourSuddenDisappearance #NetGalley

Notes on Your Sudden Disappearance by Alison Espach



Heartbreakingly bittersweet and beautiful!


When I read the blurb on this book I was hooked.

How do you go on with life after your sister is no longer here?


Sally, Kathy and Billy. Sally is in 8th grade while her older sister and Billy are in high school.
Both girls have crushes on Billy and they watch him often over the summer where he is a lifeguard.

The story continues, Kathy and Billy start dating then become a couple.

Then something shocking happens and Sally is left without Kathy, struggling and without her sister of course, nor her parent's support.

What follows is a journey that Sally embarks on, writing to Kathy, sharing the life Sally has to live without her.

The story just captivated me, Billy charmed me along with the sisters.

I did enjoy the constant sharing with Kathy, and Sally's thoughts and feelings, the way survivor guilt was a subject of the story. I smiled, laughed and shed many tears while reading.

I was captivated from page one and gulped this book down and I felt the story was realistic and emotional, how can a tragic loss of a sibling not be an emotional thing?

The bonding between Billy and Sally after Kathy died was touching and felt totally real.

I liked the growth and realness of Sally.

I liked Billy and his family as well.

I liked Kathy and Sally's parents but I had trouble with the father at times.

So this tale of growing up, becoming Sally no longer in 8th grade, was just touching and heartfelt.

And there were many warm happy moments hopeful times too interspersed with the grief and sadness.

Just a gem of a book.


4 1/2 *****

THANK YOU Alison Espach for writing this, thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for allowing me to read it. A transforming book.


review posted at NetGalley, Goodreads, Wordpress and amazon.

The title of this novel could give the impression that it is a thriller—it’s not. It's something more. Notes on Your Sudden Disappearance tells the story of Kathy’s accidental death and whether her sister Sally, her family, or her boyfriend Billy will survive the guilt that haunts them.
This elegantly written novel is about more than a single deadly accident. In its pages, the reader experiences four subsequent accidents in slow-motion—the unfolding tragedies of four ruined lives. The reactions of Kathy’s parents, Sally, and Billy wrenched my heart as they made one bad decision after another to staunch their pain. In spite of this, the novel is a story of redemption. While guilt is what brings Sally and Billy together and rips them apart, forgiveness and love finally unite them in peace.
My one complaint is that there is a lot of teenage sexuality in this novel. While it makes sense in a novel that is also a coming-of-age story, there were times it felt overdone and slowed the novel’s pace.
Four stars.

Spanning 15 years, Notes on Your Sudden Disappearance gives us Sally as she talks to her sister Kathy before and after Kathy dies. From the musings of a preteen to a grown woman, she tells of the relationship with her sister and life and everything between.

A good portion of this book read as YA/Coming of Age. As a child, Sally is very naïve, and her musings reflect such. She portrayed her grief and her enduring crush realistically. She not only lost a sister, but she lost a mother who was so engulfed in her grief that she shut her living daughter out. Espach wrote the story in equal parts, amusing and touching, and it is written well. Thank you, Henry Holt and Co., for sending this along!

Okay, to start....
I did not finish this book. I wanted to but my psyche wouldn't allow me to. I only made it 40% through until I had to put this book down. Not because it was bad, it was far from bad.

The writing was amazing. The storyline was great, very well thought out, just very deep. By deep I mean, were talking high school teens on their way to school who get into a car crash and one dies the other survive. I couldnt finish, this was a trigger for me. When I was in High School I lost a best friend almost the same way. I had to stop reading. I am so sorry to the author, I just wasn't expecting a car crash.

Based off the cover I thought it would've been a pool drowning if anything. Not to mention Billy and his play with surviving suicide attempts. Just really hits home in more ways then I could handle.

I will from the 40% of the book I did read give it atleast 4 stars. The character development was done beutifully. They were likeable characters. The story flowed well together. I just wish at the beginning of this book you had put massive trigger warnings. They need to be present so your not catching your audience as off guard as I was.

Im sorry, in advance for not finishing.

Triggers: Suicide, teenage death, car crash......

I was looking for a new book and picked Notes on Your Sudden Disappearance as an ARC request. The title might make you think that it’s a thriller, but it’s really a story about a young woman coping with loss and grief after tragedy of her sister.
Espach writes a story about said grief, and the path to the other side through Sally who adored her sister Kathy who dies in a car accident. While well written, her journey was at times depressing and sad although it did have some humorous moments as well. It seemed overly long and drawn out but it seemed like there were very few healing moments for the family and her parents left Sally to deal with her grief alone.
It is unlike anything I have read before. It’s a story of sisterhood, bonds, love, tragedy, missed opportunities, and how differently we handle grief. Spanning from childhood to adulthood, I enjoyed the wide timeline. Told in the second person over the course of 15 years, Sally Holt addresses her sister, Kathy, before and after the car accident that changed their lives forever.
Honestly though, The writing actually didn't work for me. I didn't see a lot of reviews mention this, but Espach writes this as if Sally is talking to her sister Kathy and then will even recount what Kathy said. So it's like you are watching a play and the narrator is explaining things but is also in the story. The whole thing was like a very long run on conversation. The flow was bad. I think things grinded to slow halt after the first 1/3 of the book and just stayed repetitive.
Thank you NetGalley and Henry Holt & Company for the copy of Notes On Your Sudden Disappearance

How strange was that - you were dead, you were no longer in the universe, but pizza was still good.

A contemplative character driven novel on how grief pulls us apart and pushes us together. The author does an excellent job juxtaposing major grief with the mundane moments of life continuing on. The novel has some passing issues, with the middle being a bit slow and the end feeling incomplete and abrupt, but the prose and characters are beautiful.

Thank you to Henry Holt and Co. and NetGalley for the advanced reader copy in return for my honest review.

Told from the perspective of a girl and then young woman who loses her sister in a car crash, Notes on Your Sudden Disappearance is an experience in heartbreak and grief. While the topic is sad, Espach manages to keep the plot moving and leaves readers hopeful rather than depressed. Complex feelings and behaviors are explored rather than hidden for the sake of a cute tidy romance, and the novel is stronger for it. While not a quick read, those who have time to let themselves fully immerse will enjoy the experience.

Note: I received a free ebook copy of Notes on Your Sudden Disappearance from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Ok, so this book was not at all what I was expecting. I started reading it at the beach and it is NOT a beach read. I wish I had read it at a other time so I could have slowed it down some. This book is not a lighthearted romance full of sunshine and butterflies. It’s hard. And it’s sad. And it takes you on a journey. The writing itself is so unique. It’s narrated by Sally to Kathy and it spans 15 years. There’s so much going on in these 15 years that it truly captivates you. It’s described as an “unconventional love story” and it most certainly is. My biggest problem with the book was the ending. While I respect the ending to me it needed more. The entire book takes you on such a trip and then it just stops. A tad abruptly for my liking. I needed it to wrap up slower and more completely. Other than that there were a few random specifics that I didn’t love still overall a very great book.

Such a good book! Highly recommend it to anyone that is wanting a good thrill! New to me author and I will for sure be wanting to read more by them!

This is the kind of book that makes me want to drop everything else I am reading, and immediately read everything else by the author. Seriously I did not want it to end. A) It is written absolutely BEAUTIFULLY; B) it's haunting and elegiac first and foremost, but the writer's style softens and brings humor to the story. I love how the author was able to get into the heart and mind of Sally, a young girl, then young woman, who loses her older sister to a car accident. Her (sometimes grotesque, always pithy) ruminations seem spot-on for a preteen grappling to understand unknowable death, especially a violent, sudden death of a sibling. The portrait of the parents is stunning and also beautiful - the mom especially is fairly broken, and over the course of fifteen years on we watch as the grief follows and envelops the family. And yet, they hobble on together. Through it all, Sally makes sense of life and love with a fixation on her older sister's boyfriend -- the one who was driving the car when she died -- and who himself has a tender, broken life following this tragic event.

A highlight for me was Sally's thoughts about her therapist, who claims she has "no center." I loved how the rest of the book compares Kathy (the older child who died) to Hurricane Kathy, the storm moving through their town, and its silent watchful eye (the center!) passing over them all.

I want to cry again just writing this! THANK YOU Alison Espach for writing this, thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for allowing me to read it. A transforming book -- I purchased an extra copy for our Hot Picks collection and will talk it up at every opportunity.

Beautiful story about love, loss and grief and how each of us process loss and grief differently. This book captured my heart and attention from beginning to end. Heartwarming as well as heartbreaking.

Beautiful story about love, loss and grief and how each of us process loss and grief differently. This book captured my heart and attention from beginning to end. Heartwarming as well as heartbreaking.

Beautiful story about love, loss and grief and how each of us process loss and grief differently. This book captured my heart and attention from beginning to end. Heartwarming as well as heartbreaking.

4.75

First, thank you Netgalley for the opportunity to read this book! I absolutely LOVED this. I listened via audio AND read the ebook when I was unable to listen.

The narrator's voice was POINT on. It was on point with my assessment of the characters. This was a beautifully written yet harrowing and deeply sad story. I actually was able to relate to many of the feelings and thoughts Sally experienced, from the death of a sibling, to growing up with the pressures of school, fitting in, trying to take care of her parents. I felt liKe I was able to really get to know Sally and her deep, dark desires, thoughts and passions. She was truly a very unhappy character that just kept pushing through life. I loved watching the decline and sadness her parents experienced, especially her mother. How difficult that must have been for Sally . This showed how painful aging of parents can be not only for the parents but also for the children. The author did a wonderful job bringing these characters to life. At first I was unsure how I felt about the quick ending, but looking back throughout the book, it was beautifully done and I felt like Sally was finally at peace and maybe able to at last achieve some sense of happiness and joy.
Bravo Alison Espach, looking forward to reading more of your novels!

I was looking for a new book and picked Notes on Your Sudden Disappearance. The title might make you think that it’s a thriller, but it’s really a story about a young woman coping with loss and grief after tragedy.

Told in the second person over the course of 15 years, Sally Holt addresses her sister, Kathy, before and after the car accident that changed their lives forever. As the novel begins, Sally looks up to and adores her older sister. The two share a room and part of their nightly routine is to debrief and share confidences. When Kathy starts dating the popular Billy Barnes, Sally hears all the juicy details. After the car wreck, Sally keeps talking to her sister as a way to cope with her grief. You really don’t need to know any more about the plot – just go in cold and let the story hook you.

I absolutely loved this story by Alison Espach. The second-person narrative made it feel fresh and unique, and the story was funny and sad and full of unexpected twists. I fell in love with Sally and Billy and didn’t want the story to end. Highly recommended. .

Thank you NetGalley and Henry Holt & Company for the copy of Notes On Your Sudden Disappearance. I’m afraid this book was not for me. The story never really got started for me and I didn’t like Sally or seeing everything through her eyes. However, the writing was great and made me wish I enjoyed the story more. 2.5 stars rounded up to 3.

This is a beautiful story; a story of a young girls loss of her adored older sister and the aftermath of grief and trying to grow up with uncertainty. With parents who seem to have lost all ambition and sometimes reality over their loss. This young girl, Sally, takes notes which are actually conversations with her sister, Kathy, from the day of loss and the next 15 years. It's a lovely story of a younger sister needing answers and guiding and relies on her notes of one sided conversations. Thank you. @NetGalley@HenryHoltandCo@NotesOnYourSuddenDisappearance@AlisonEspach

Thirteen year old Sally Holt and her sixteen year old sister Kathy share an idyllic life. They share dreams, secrets, and a crush on basketball hero Billy Barnes. Things begin to change during the summer before Sally’s eighth grade year when Kathy becomes Billy’s girlfriend. Sally misses the closeness she used to share with Kathy. When Sally persuades Kathy and Billy to drive her to school, a tragedy occurs. Notes on Your Sudden
Disappearance is mainly Sally telling Kathy about the events of the next fifteen years. The second person viewpoint was unusual but I liked it. This is a good story but overall I found it depressing. The ending also didn’t work for me. I thank NetGalley and the publisher for the opportunity to read this ARC.

Sally Holt lives in the shadow of her older sister, Kathy. She adores her and wants to be just like her when she grows up. The sisters are close and share everything. When Kathy’s crush, Billy Barnes, finally notices Kathy, things change. Kathy still shares with Sally, but Billy has taken over Kathy’s affections. No one realizes that Sally, too has a crush on Billy, even though she hates that’s he’s taken her sister away from her. When a tragedy happens, the family and Billy are completely broken. Sally draws closer to Billy, but her family has cut all ties. Espach writes a story about grief, and the path to the other side through the side of a teen who adored her sister. While well written, he journey was at times depressing and sad although it did have some humorous moments as well, but it seemed like the struggle was overly long and drawn out (don’t get me wrong, everyone grieves differently), but in the telling it seemed like there were very few healing moments for the family and her parents left Sally to deal with her grief alone. Sally and Billy both have feelings of guilt and regret, but somehow they form a bond, even when they don’t see each other or talk for years. Where will their futures take them and will they ever be able to get over Kathy’s death? A coming of age story different from most. A story of deep grief and the path to healing, forgiveness and a second chance at life.