I was expecting something different for this story, and it really took me a long time to understand that I wasn't going to get it. I thought this would be a murder mystery, and it totally wasn't. It's a story of two sisters and family dynamics. It was a bit too slow for me, and I didn't love the writing style, however the characters are really well-developed. I think people that enjoy character-driven stories will enjoy this.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the opportunity to read and review this book early! All opinions are my own!

Please don’t let the cover fool you on this book, this is not a light read. This is very heavy. With that said, I really enjoyed the way the author wrote this story (from the younger sisters perspective like she’s talking to her deceased sister). I will definitely check out more from this author in the future.

An intimate story of two sisters who were very close. Kathy is the older sister and Sally idolizes her. The things they talk about and do are pretty ordinary. Their family seems fairly happy. Kathy has fallen in love for the first time with Billy Barnes. Sally watches him and has a crush on him. Sally assumes that life will stay like this and she will always have her sister to depend on and love. Then suddenly that is over. Billy, Kathy, and Sally go out for a drive. There is a terrible accident and in an instant Kathy dies. Life changes forever.

The book is written to Kathy. Sally holds Kathy throughout everything, her death and reliving it and then after Kathy is really gone. Sally still always has Kathy beside her. A very poignant look at love, grief, and how trauma changes someone. Sally hadn’t ever become herself yet when this occurs. She must navigate every choice and decision through the lens on her sister’s thoughts. She is supposed to be ok again, but is not, doesn’t have a sense of what to do or say. The only person she can speak honestly with is Billy. Yet, Billy is tied as tight as rope to Kathy, and she must tug her along even with this. Is it possible to have real feeling for someone under these circumstances? Is love possible or is this just a person to hold onto to keep Kathy extra close? An incredible examination of all of this and how her family changes while Sally is trying to figure out how to live without her sister. Heart aching look at love and loss. Very well written and different then I expected, I felt very taken in by Sally and almost as if I was invading on her personal space with Kathy. Definitely Recommend this book.

I read this book with both the book and the Audio 🎧. This worked very well together. I liked reading many of the passages, but the narrator’s voice made the connection with Kathy seem that much more real. It was done well.

Thank you NetGalley, Alison Espach, and Henry Holt & Co. for a copy of this book. I am glad I had the chance to read a review it.

An excellent exploration of grief. Slow and thought-provoking. Espach does an excellent job of creating characters that feel real and fully developed. I will definitely read more from her in the future.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the free e-copy.

I looked forward to this book because the premise is fantastic but I really struggled with the writing style and dialogue.

Interesting characters and storyline that sometimes can get a bit slow but has just enough of a nugget that makes you want to find out what happens between Sally and Billy after the main event. I voluntarily reviewed an advance readers copy of this book.

😪Moving story but lost some momentum at end🏘🚘🚨

4.5🌟 stars
The close relationship between sisters Sally and Kathy is the soul of this heart-wrenching exploration of loss, grief and the long-term effect of a lively, loved teenager lost in her prime. Kathy is popular, beautiful and happy until the day she is tragically lost to her younger sister Sally, their parents and Billy, Kathy's boyfriend. Guilt and sorrow abounds but as Sally narrates the tale as if speaking directly to her sister she also resurrects images of their happy times together in their Connecticut hometown and Rhode Island.

I loved the poignancy of most of the book and the way Sally and Billy connect after Kathy is gone. It's apparent from the opening scenes that from her tween years Sally is fascinated by Billy just as much as her teenage sister and there are hints that the interest may be reciprocated to some extent. Realistically, as Kathy's family wrestles with their loss and Billy's role in it, Sally and Billy as an item are a non-starter. They come and go on the edges of each other's lives, their timing always off and Kathy never forgotten.

The manner in which different people confront and deal with grief is a major element of the book. Some work through their grief and others like Sally and her mother, can't really get past it.

Such a great tale and then, about 20% from the end, the story loses some focus. A lot of information, like Sally's run-ins with her editor, her college years and a detailed description of how to eat a lobster, that just lengthened the book. The climax brought the focus back in but the ending was a bit too abrupt in my mind.

Still, overall, it's an emotion- and thought-provoking coming of age story really well told. And, lest I forget, Sally's zingers made me smile and laugh at times. This is a girl with spirit and strength despite the quiet, mild manner.

Thanks to Henry Holt and Company and NetGalley for sharing a complimentary advance copy of the book; this is my voluntary and honest opinion.

This is a story about Sally.

Her sister, Kathy, Kathy's boyfriend, and Sally get into a fatal car accident while driving to school. Kathy's boyfriend, Billy Barnes, was the driver of the car. Kathy and Billy were just 16 years old.

In Sally's grief, she tells the story of her life before and after the tragic events to her dead sister Kathy. The suffering of their parents. The complications of life and the pursuit of moving forward. The grief and friendship between Billy and Sally, then eventually the love they form.

The storytelling style is unique to me, even if it takes a little getting used to. It's a coming of age story that starts in the 90s. It's about first love/lust. It's about how we cope with unexpected death. It was heartbreaking.

I really enjoyed this story and give it a 4.25 -4.50.

2.5 stars. I'm going to be nice and round up for the star rating.

A long walk to not a whole lot.

I have one older sister. I found the first half of this book to be incredibly engaging and well written. The second half, however, dragged a lot. Past a certain point I just couldn't figure out why this book was still happening. For me, this book should have had a very different ending. The way that Sally treats her significant others throughout this book makes her incredibly unlikeable.

Sally and Kathy are sisters and love nothing more than Billy Barnes. As they enter adolescence, Kathy and Billy fall in love. Tragedy strikes and Sally’s is left to put herself and her family back together, only where does Billy fit in? This book takes the reader on a journey of a family in the aftermath of trauma. It is a story of losing or finding oneself and second chances.
I enjoyed this book. It was a tad slow at times when I wanted it to be a faster pace.
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the advanced copy in exchange for my review.

So I have to just go ahead and say this- I was conflicted with this story. Like a lot of reviews I was expecting a murder-mystery/thriller as the cover and tittle are very suggestive towards that genre. This book was neither of those things. What it was: a great story about a sister and a family dealing with a huge blow to their life and how they all processed a night that changed all of their lives and of those involved forever. It is told through Sally's voice and it narrated a span of about twenty years or so and the life she shared with her sister Kathy. Though I felt like I hadn't picked a book in my genre I still read the entire thing because I felt a connection to most of the characters and very much wanted to see what happened to all of them and how they would reconcile they're feelings in the end. It is very well written and if iI'd have to categorize it, I'd say its more of a slow burning character study with dysfunctional family dynamics.

Thank you to Henry Holt for the Arc! I enjoyed this book even though it was outside my genre of choice.

OUT 5/17/2022

I tried starting this over at least five times and couldn’t get through more than the first 10% of it. There isn’t anything specifically wrong with the book, it just unfortunately wasn’t my cup of tea and sent me into a bit of a reading slump because I couldn’t get into it.

I honestly wasn't ready for this book. I thought it was going to be a mystery and romance, but boy was I wrong. That certainly doesn't take away the power and beauty of this novel. I think I took it more internally, and personally, because I lost my younger brother in a car accident 8 years ago. He was 26 at the time, but the idea of survivor's guilt and being the remaining child to two devastated parents hit hard. No matter how old you are losing a sibling is devastating and the aftermath is hard on us too.

Favorite quote from this book is towards the end when Sally finally goes to see a therapist. Her therapist says "two people can't throw up in the toilet at the same time". Man, this hit hard.

This book is extremely well written and I finished this book in 2 days.

Thank you to netgalley for letting me read this book before it's release later this month in exchange for an honest review of the book.

Notes on Your Sudden Disappearance wasn’t for me and I probably would have realized that if I’d read the description up front. My primary disappointment is that the way the book presents is misleading. Based on the cover, the title and the tone of the first chapter that I read in Buzz Books I thought this was going to be a twisty thriller. It’s actually a coming-of-age story where the main character is a teenager for three quarters of the book. Although she loses her sister which is horrific and has long-lasting impact on her and her family, the events in the story are fairly regular. I thought the ending was abrupt and I didn’t leave it convinced that she had actually changed or recovered. While it had a pretty good start, the majority of the book dragged on without a lot of plot and the ending was unsatisfying. Add to that language that may be common to teenagers (body parts, the f word) and characters that turn to sex or alcohol to fill the void in their hearts -- I can’t recommend. Thanks to NetGalley and Henry Holt and Company for an early copy to read and review; this book comes out May 17, 2022.

This book was a journey that was thought provoking. While reading it, I could relate to Sally. I could see life through her eyes. I could feel what Sally was feeling. It was beautifully written. I highly recommend it for anybody who would like to read something refreshingly different.

Sally loved her sister Kathy. They were best friends. They did everything together until the summer Kathy got a boyfriend. That summer changed everything. One moment Kathy is there and the next she's not. While coming to terms with the sudden loss of Kathy, Sally and her parents deal with grief differently, but life must go on. Sally has to grow up in the shadow of her sister and navigate being a teenager without her. She questions everything and whether Kathy would have done it that way. This book is essentially a book dedicated to her Kathy from Sally. She wanted her to know, wherever she is, that she is always thought of.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for this free copy of Notes on Your Sudden Disappearance in exchange for my honest review.

Notes on Your Sudden Disappearance by Alison Espach is a dark, coming-of-age story that had me glued to the pages. I always love a story like this that unfolds slowly and just sweeps you up in emotion. This story is a fantastic blend of love and loss, memories, relationships, secrets, the pain of growing up, grief, and longing. It’s such a good book, and a nice break from the suspense and thrillers that I typically read.



The summer before Sally Holt starts the eighth grade begins as a gloriously uneventful one. It’s full of family trips to the beach and long afternoons at the local pool with her older sister Kathy, which they mostly use as an excuse to ogle Billy Barnes, who works the concession stand there. A rising senior and local basketball star, Billy has been an unending source of intrigue for both girls since he jumped off the school roof in fifth grade, and their fascination with him is one of the few things the increasingly different sisters have in common. By summer’s end Billy and Kathy are an item—an unthinkable stroke of luck that ends in an even more unthinkable tragedy.

Set over the course of fifteen years, Notes on Your Sudden Disappearance is narrated by Sally as she addresses Kathy before, during, and after her death. We watch as Kathy’s absence creates a gaping hole that only Billy—now firmly off-limits to Sally—understands and might possibly begin to fill. Charting years of their shared history and missed connections, Notes on Your Sudden Disappearance is both a breathtaking love story between two broken people who are unexplainably, inconveniently drawn to each other, and a wry, sharply observant coming-of-age story that looks at the ways the people we love the most continue to shape our lives long after they’re gone.

Coming in May.

I think I would’ve gone into this book with a better headspace if I didn’t think it was a thriller/suspense. It felt a little long. However, I loved Sally and found her witty and endearing. I also loved the mods to the 80s and 90s.

3.5 Stars...

This book was a little heavier than I was expecting. 16-year-old Kathy is killed in a car accident on her way to school one morning. Her boyfriend, Billy, was driving, and her 13-year-old sister, Sally, was also in the car but survived unharmed.

This story is Sally narrating to Kathy what becomes of her and her parents after her death and how they each cope with her loss.

It's sad, strange, it's just all-around heavy, and it left me feeling slightly depressed every time I picked it up...which may explain why it took me over a week to get through it.

While I thought the story was really well written, I never really liked Sally, which I felt bad about because she was a child who lost the big sister she adored in a terrible accident that she was also involved in.

Sally and Kathy are both infatuated with high-schooler Billy Barnes. Kathy and Billy are dating at the time of her death, but Sally harbors a secret love for her sister's boyfriend, 4 years her senior. I had a hard time understanding Sally's love/obsession with Billy throughout her teenage years and on through to her late 20s (where the book ends).

Ms. Espach did a very good job of making the relationship seem believable and realistic, but I think my problem was that I identified more with Sally and Kathy's mother rather than Sally. As a 41-year-old mother to a teenager myself, the emotion I felt most while reading this was the grief of Susan, and I struggled to be able to get on board and understand the Sally/Billy aspect of the story.

I think YA readers will absolutely understand Sally and Billy and will be far more invested in their lives than what happens to her mom and dad (as they should be).

Overall, while I thought the story was well written and flowed evenly, I just thought it was so sad and depressing, and I found Sally to be an odd little girl and an even stranger adult. One I didn't really like.

I think there's bound to be some disappointment with some readers who go into this thinking it's a missing person/psychological mystery, but let me assure you, it is far from that. This is a deep character study of what loss and grief can do to a family and how it can shape and change a person so completely from childhood into adulthood.

Pros: This is a well-written, quiet examination of a family’s grief following the death of their older sister/daughter told from the point of view of the younger sister. The author did a fantastic job capturing the voice of the younger sister as a preteen, teenager, and 20-something.

Cons: This book was not for me in the same way that Sally Rooney’s books are not for me. That being said, I think readers who love Sally Rooney books will enjoy this book.

Thank you to NetGalley and Henry Holt & Company for the opportunity to read this book.

Notes On Your Sudden Disappearance is a beautifully written coming of age story about a family, especially the younger daughter, grappling with the loss of the oldest daughter. Amidst the grief that Sally, the younger sister, is dealing with, she falls in love with her deceased sister's boyfriend. They share this despair about their mutual loss, bond through their grief and finally discover each other and grapple with falling love. I absolutely loved this book and can not wait to read more books written by Alison Espach! Thank you to NetGalley for the ARC!