The Many Half-lived Lives of Sam Sylvester features:

• a nonbinary mc changing schools
• a mysterious death in a small town buried by time

Seems good, right? It's exactly what drove me to read it. There's that feeling of "hmm this smells like a good mystery and I want it"

As much as I want to say it delivered, tho, for me it did not. It was more contemporary fic than mystery, and I get that. The author must have wanted to incorporate issues such as bullying and gender in this book, but to me it seemed like it overpowered the plot, therefore leveling down the suspense from a mystery.

Lastly, the writing could get overly descriptive sometimes, it makes the scene feel so long and therefore dragging [me]

Apart from that, however, I have no other issues. I freaking love Sam's father very much.

2 stars for this book, I'd still very much recommend it because I want to know what other people would think about it.

I received an ARC from the publisher via NetGalley. Review is based on the final copy. All opinions are my own.
The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester is a compelling new read with a compassionate blend of contemporary issues impacting queer teens with elements of mystery/thriller. It hits all the right notes, building the intrigue and suspense where needed, yet not lacking in quiet, compassionate moments.
I love the initial dynamics that are set up among the major characters, touching on complex issues. Sam is the non-binary autistic adopted child of a Black single dad, and I loved their dynamic together, especially when it’s so rare to see adoptive parents to begin with in fiction, much less nonwhite adoptive parents, and to have it be a loving relationship that just exists and not be part of some “seeking catharsis about my identity” arc.
The friendship dynamics with the people Sam connects with at school is also wonderful and largely positive to Sam’s intersectional identities. There is a little minor subplot where there is a confrontation related to Sam’s asexuality which wasn’t as fleshed out, compared to their experiences being autistic or non-binary and the impact of them having to navigate society with those identities, but for the most part, I have few complaints.
The exploration of identity and navigating trauma related to that is well-balanced with the plotline of digging into the past and investigating what happened to a young boy, Billy, who was murdered in the 1980s, who has a connection with Sam’s new house. It’s definitely a gradual build, with breadcrumbs here and there, but it’s enough to keep you intrigued until the mystery element comes into full force near the end, when it feels earned and well foreshadowed.
I really enjoyed this, and Maya MacGregor is an author I will be likely reading more from in the future. If you enjoy books that mix contemporary YA with mystery/thriller elements, I recommend picking this one up.

5/5

This will be one of my favorite books of 2022, I am sure of that. I just loved it so much. Objectively, there were some small flaws, but they were so heavily outweighed by the amazing parts!

The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester felt unique for many reasons and asks for an open mind in terms of plot and theme. It’s on a frontier between genres, which took me some time to be comfortable with, but once I was, I really enjoyed the story. I think you might need to start by throwing your expectations out the window if you want to experience it fully. The whole story is about being yourself and being allowed to live your life without fitting into a box, and the book honors that message in many ways, starting with its uniqueness. It exists as this one big package that doesn’t really belong in any genre, but also kind of fits in five of them. I was a bit unsure at first, but I ended up loving that. At its core, it’s a mystery blended with classic YA contemporary themes, and touches of paranormal, or whatever other influences you want to see in it!

My absolute favorite thing in this book was without a doubt its main character. I loved Sam from the first chapter as it was so easy to relate to them. I loved literally everything about that kid and it felt so comforting to be stuck in their point of view. I didn’t want the book to end. The autistic representation really spoke to my heart and made me feel seen, which doesn’t happen often. Sam is also completely, unapologetically queer and non-binary. Overall, they are one of my favorite main characters that I’ve encountered recently, and I loved the way they were written.
My other favorite character is Junius Sylvester, Sam’s dad. It really makes me so happy when YA books include adults—especially parents—who are supportive and full of love. Junius was that, and so much more. My adult heart related to him so easily. Not only was he great aromantic asexual representation, I also absolutely loved the idea of a single adoptive parent, who adopted a child and not a baby. Loved the fact that there was a mutual choice, that they adopted each other. The Sylvesters are going to stay one of my favorite fictional families, probably forever.

This book made me so emotional in ways I didn’t expect and in ways books very rarely do! I really felt like I was part of the Sylvester family, a bit between Sam and Junius, connecting very easily with the both of them. This may be a book for younger readers, but I am convinced that I was the perfect age to enjoy it fully and experience all its gorgeous subtleties. The idea of family that it conveys filled me with joy. I think that aroace people, like others in the LGBTQ+ community, often worry about how they fit into the world and society’s idea of what a family must be. I sometimes get scared because I know that my wishes for my future don’t align with everyone’s expectations and that this might lead to me being lonely. But characters like Junius and Sam exist to prove that there are so many ways to be happy, to find your happiness or to build it. It’s about looking for the right people and surrounding yourself with the family that you choose, and I’m thankful for this specific kind of representation!

Clearly, the characters are a big part of why I loved The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester so much, but there was a lot more to it. The plot kept me invested and excited. I never felt like the novel got too long and I was pulled in from start to finish. Sure, I was a bit confused at first by the plot and the different stylistic elements. I felt like walking on a line between contemporary fiction, mystery, paranormal, thriller. It was very intriguing. At some point I was doubting literally everyone and even though I loved Sam with all my heart, I was sometimes doubting them as well. I really liked how different elements and aesthetics were brought into this and how easily I ended up accepting that these could coexist.

Another aspect I loved a lot was how the theme of death was handled. Our main character Sam owns a book in which they keep information on people who died before their nineteenth birthday. It is a bit morbid, but it’s also a way to honor these people and keep their memory alive. The idea of death is omnipresent in the book, and in Sam’s thoughts. Ultimately, Sam’s interest in death is simply their way to express how much they want to live, and a way to deal with their own mortality.
This theme and the way it is woven into the story really gives it another depth, which I really enjoyed. I am used to reading books with diversity and to seeing characters fight for their right to live, but I loved that the focus here was put on the very raw and visceral desire to live, in all its possible definitions. The desire to live, as in to experience things. The desire to live, as in to survive, live to see another day. It brought me back to one truth: the fact that, in this world, people get killed for being different. So yes, this entire book is obsessive about death, and thus about living.

This may not be inherent to being queer, but more to being young and confused, and feeling different. But I strongly understand the sense of doom that transpires through the novel and its main character. Sam feels like they have an expiration date that they’re getting close to, and I can relate to that in a way. I remember being unable to imagine myself older, like picturing myself as an adult was impossible and a grown-up version of me would never exist. Obviously, I did live past my teens, but I definitely remember being Sam at some point in my life. If you somehow relate to that as well, I’d really recommend picking up this book, especially if you sometimes feel like you’re running out of time.

To sum it all up, The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester is an amazing novel whose plot leaves a few things up to interpretation, but deals with its main themes with depth, heart and raw honesty. I can’t wait to see what Maya MacGregor writes next, because this one is definitely a new favorite of mine!

Thank you so much to NetGalley and Astra Publishing House for this eARC!

Content warnings: ableism, violence, bullying, hate crime, attempted murder, strangulation, stalking, misgendering, transphobia, homopobia, biphobia, anxiety, panic attacks, suicidal thoughts, mention of cancer, gun violence.

4.5 stars

If you're looking for a great YA mystery with incredible representation, you've come to the right place.

I could not believe how seamlessly The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester addressed so many things. Sam is a non-binary teen with autism adopted by a single, black, asexual father. They've dealt with extreme bullying leading to a near-death experience, which prompts a move to a more accepting city. They unintentionally move into a house which is the location of a 30-year cold case resulting in the mysterious death of a teenager that Sam has researched in the past. Sam's father, Junius desperately wants to protect his child, though Sam and Junius are both painfully aware that Sam will always be unsafe. The emotions running through the narrative are almost tangible as Sam and Junius navigate this new town and new school, unable to escape their past completely.

"Every ounce of love is always an act of desperate hope."

I don't know how it was possible, but the twin narratives of bullying/adapting to a new school and this 30-year cold case worked together incredibly well. It never felt like one was overshadowing the other, overlapping in all the right places to create tension and interest. With a few paranormal elements to raise the stakes, The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester has everything I could ever want in a story. Not to mention, the family, friendship, and romance elements are heart-achingly sweet.

I absolutely loved The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester and could not recommend it highly enough.

"'I don't know if the school is ready for us.'
'Sister, my field of fucks is barren'"

Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for providing this eARC in exchange for an honest review.

The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester follows nonbinary autistic teen Sam Sylvester as they move to a new town following a traumatic event. Sam is obsessed with the stories of teens who die before they turn nineteen, so when they move into a house haunted by a thirty-year-old teen death, Sam and their new friends set out to discover the truth behind the mysterious incident.

This was such a great read! Though it is a contemporary YA mystery, the mystery part is somewhat minimal in comparison to the contemporary YA part. We spend a lot of time with Sam as they acclimate to their new school, as they form new friendships, and as they just generally survive life. Though the mystery of what happened to Billy is ever-present, developments in that mystery are fairly sparse throughout the novel. Clues often don't lead very far, if anywhere, and the narrative is comfortable allowing a significant amount of time to pass between revelations. The conclusion to the mystery plot may be predictable for some readers (I had a good idea of who it was by the halfway mark), but even with a level of predictability, the conclusion is fresh and satisfying.

The best part of this book, for me, was the characters. We spend a lot of time with Sam, learning about their identity, their trauma, and just generally what makes them who they are. Sam is stellar representation for a lot of underrepresented readers, which is just amazing to see. In addition, Sam's father and friends, especially Shep, are really well-rounded and dimensional characters who I could honestly spend another 100+ pages reading about. I had such a good time watching them interact, and in the case of Sam and Shep, watching their relationship develop. All of it felt real and true and authentic and full of heart.

I would encourage any potential readers to look into the trigger warnings for this book before picking it up. Sam does have a lot of support, and the narrative often takes time to step back and deconstruct the characters' triggering experiences, but there is still some relatively graphic violence and other triggers that are good to know about going in.

Representation galore!
For lack of a better term, this is certainly an #ownvoices novel. Author Maya MacGregor shares many of Sam’s identities; they are both nonbinary, queer and autistic. It seems likely that MacGregor poured many of their own lived experiences into The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester, especially with regard to autism.

Interestingly, I had watched this panel about writing neurodiversity in Sci-Fi/Fantasy right before picking up this novel. Though I’d watched it to better understand how to incorporate my own neurodivergence into my writing, the panel helped me engage with this book.

One of the things most panelists agreed upon is that they don’t like to label their characters as neurodivergent. Doing so makes them feel like they’re writing for a neurotypical audience. Me? I like things labeled. I like to know an author intended what I’m seeing.

However, after reading The Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester, I sort of see what they’re saying. There are a many examples of Sam telling the reader, “This is what X is like for autistic people.”

The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester Maya MacGregor Cover

My intention here isn’t to be gate-keep-y for an identity that isn’t mine (autism). Personally, I find art aimed at the “in-crowd” more effective. Even if it’s not a world I know, I love getting a glimpse into someone else’s life.

That’s not to say that I don’t think Sam shouldn’t have explicitly mentioned they are autistic; on the contrary, I think it works perfectly when they tell people within the story.

For the reader, however, I think moments such as the way Sam introduces themself — “My name is Sam. My pronouns are they/them” — tells us so much more about Sam. Much more than their asides about “X = autism.” There are many lovely beats and moments like that throughout the book. They work beautifully. I wanted more of them and less of the latter.

Also, side note, I don’t think I’ve ever read a book that talks about IEPs (individualized educational plans), so hallelujah!

I have one tiny little nitpick more and this isn’t directed solely at MacGregor, but any author writing in a dialect that isn’t their own. When I read an American writing UK English, and I see “on the weekend” instead of “at the weekend,” I cringe. In The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester, there are a similar things — Americans do not say “I get on with someone.”


OK, but what about the plot?
How lovely to have a book where the central character holds so many marginalized identities, but that’s not the central plot point! The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester is a supernatural mystery at its core. The way the town is so Stepford Wives-ish about the whole mystery is the icing on the cake; it’s hilarious.

Even though the whodunit is a bit obvious, it doesn’t detract from the book. The way Sam and their relationships grow through solving the mystery is the true win. I also loved that some of the supernatural stuff was never explained; it just was. (I’m seriously craving some popcorn now … )

The choice to make Sam eighteen worked really well (though my brain did make me confirm that Oregon has “close-in-age” consent laws). That extra bit of legal independence made many of Sam’s choices and challenges make more sense.

Should you read it?
Heck yeah! Despite my tiny nitpicks, I couldn’t put The Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester down. It’s a quick read and you’re sure to get something out of it, too. But please, read the content warnings below. It’s quite a doozy in that regard.

On a final note, I’m a sucker for accepting, amazing parents and Sam’s dad really is the best, as all the teen characters repeatedly mention.

Content warnings: Anaphylaxis due to allergies, attempted murder, bullying, hate crimes, gun violence, misgendering, murder, outing, panic attacks, passive suicidal ideation, strangulation, queerphobia.

The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester is out May 3. Pick up a copy at your local indie bookstore or library! 📚

Rating:3.5
YA is always a hit or a miss for me, this one was kind of middle of the road. There was nothing bad about it, I just wasn't expecting it to read on the younger side of YA. I still would recommend it if you're interested.

Excellent supernatural mystery! I can’t believe that this is a debut novel. Maya MacGregor knocks it out of the park!

There is so much to unpack in The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester. The mystery is solid. MacGregor has a realistic reason as to why Sam would be invested in a young person’s death. Then MacGregor adds in Sam moving into Billy’s bedroom where he died and that cinches it. The supernatural aspect is not over the top. It is just the right touch of spookiness for a story taking place in today’s world.

The other main cast member, I feel, is Sam’s dad. Junius is my unicorn. He adopts a kid on his own. He picks Sam even though he is on the autism spectrum and hadn't spoken a word to anyone at the foster home. Junius could have picked an easier road, but he didn’t. He is firmly in Sam’s corner, no matter what comes out of his mouth. Loyalty. Unconditional Love. Don’t we all wish we had this?

The secondary cast is stellar. MacGregor gives us a diverse cast from bisexuals to genderfluid to non-white characters. I could go on and on about Shep, but I think I want to talk about Aidan. Aidan is an amazing ally. He says something at one point to Dylan, a closeted gay youth, that hanging out with gay people doesn’t change who you are. I was cheering so much inside me. Aidan reminds me of Harry Styles (who hasn’t formally said if they are rainbow or not). After watching Sam's new friend group interact with each other, he joined in risking his own popularity to be a part of this group. Then he started changing his fashion and damn I wish I had a picture of Sky and him at prom. Styling.

Let’s talk about Sam. I am going to warn you that Sam goes through some harsh events and MacGregor finally shows what happened after many glimpses. Take a deep breath and be glad that Sam can too. Sam is also loyal and willing to let people in after everything that has happened to him. He doesn’t let his anxiety get in the way - which makes him better than me on most days. (chuckle)

I love The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester. I think it is the combination of Sam and Junius that makes this story for me. The mystery is solid. The friendships are even more so. Did I forget to mention that there is a romance amidst all of this, pairing an ace and a bisexual who are so sweet together. MacGregor gives us everything and I love it.

I received an ARC of this book and I am writing a review without prejudice and voluntarily.

thank you netgalley and publisher for the arc in exchange for an honest review.

representation of a non-binary main character is so important and refreshing!! sam is also autistic, which is another thing i’ve never encountered in a main character in a book before. it was just really nice to have that kind of diversity.

i think some aspects in this book were unrealistic, like the amount of openly out high schoolers. in my experience, most people in that age category are still figuring out who they are or are not comfortable sharing it with just anyone. but yeah, this is fiction so it is nice to see characters being unapologetically themselves.

the whole murder plot (and like ghost stuff i guess) was also a bit much for my taste, i didn’t really care until the big reveal at the end. but i guess it’s nice that this book had other things going on than just sam’s gender identity or sexuality, because i find that is a commonly occurring problem in books with/about lgbt+ characters. at least this book didn’t have that issue.

in the acknowledgements, the author said that they wrote the book they wished they had when they were younger. i’m just so happy books like this exist. representation matters. i hope others can find comfort in this book. ❤️

First of all, let me say that the 2SLGBTQIA+ representation in this story is wonderful. I really enjoyed getting to know the main character, Sam. Some of their struggles were truly heartbreaking. No one should have to be bullied.

I did enjoy that Sam went on to find a home with a parent who clearly loves them. The father was a great character and the kind of parent that I hope we could all be fortunate enough to have.

The only criticism I have is that I feel as though Sam's story was almost enough without the "30-year-old mystery." The mystery wasn't really anything too original.

Really it's Sam and the supporting characters that make this a great read.

If you are a fan of YA books with great diverse representation, then this is a great read for you.

4,5 stars.

All I knew when I finished this book was that I loved it. We follow Sam, an autistic non-binary person trying to rebuild their life in a new place after something horrible is done to them. Despite the extremely difficult topics—from hate crimes to stalking—it transmits a very hopeful and positive message. This book beautifully depicts different types of relationships and it incorporates some discussions about what living as a queer autistic non-binary person is like. Additionally, there is a gripping mystery at the core of it that will keep you turning the pages.

Firstly, what was possibly my favourite part of the book—and I don’t say this lightly because I loved all of it—was the relationships that were explored. The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester not only depicts a wonderfully diverse group of friends but it also heavily focuses on father-child relationships. Sam’s dad is a black single father fighting to keep his child safe, and his absolute devotion to Sam bleeds through the page. From the very first page you know that Sam and their dad have an extremely close-knit relationship based on trust and mutual understanding. Seeing this kind of relationship was truly refreshing in YA, where more often than not parents are either absent or not on great terms with their children. And not only that, but it was masterfully written because it didn’t sound cheesy or over the top at any moment.

Another aspect that I believe was crafted genuinely well was how Sam’s intersectional identities were represented. It was always incorporated in the most natural way—how it should always be—when they would casually mention binding or stimming in passing. This portrayal without recurring to stereotypes or being over the top is truly valuable as it definitely makes you empathise more with the characters. And, going on a slight tangent, it’s the reason why we should push for marginalised authors being the ones writing about marginalised characters.

However, that there was such a nonchalant representation of the characters’ identities doesn’t mean there wasn’t space for the pertinent discussions. Bisexuality, asexuality and aromanticism as well as being non-binary and autistic were all touched upon. There wasn’t any big spiel but rather they were just treated in a way that was relevant to the story.

Finally, I need to mention the mystery. Sam is trying to discover what really happened to Billy Clement, a boy that died back in the 80s in their new town. Everyone claims that it was an accident but Sam believes he was murdered. I loved how trying to uncover this mystery somehow helps Sam deal with their own near death experience. It is definitely a gripping part of the story which is really well-balanced with the rest of what’s going on in Sam’s life.

All in all, I really loved this book. The heart-warming exploration of family relationships and the depiction of a beautiful friend group made me tear up in more than one occasion while the thrilling mystery had me wanting to never put this down. Furthermore, the way that marginalised identities were treated with nothing but outstanding normalcy and respect throughout the novel was definitely the cherry on top.

Thank you to Astra Publishing and Netgalley for an arc of this book.

After a nearly life-ending attack when Sam lived in Montana, they move to Astoria, Oregon with their adoptive father to try and start over. But what Sam's dad doesn't know is that they think they won't make it to their 19th birthday and join the book full of other teenagers who died too young--including the one that died in their very house.

I loved this mystery/thriller so so much! I was completely absorbed throughout the entire book and really consumed it quickly. Sam is such an amazing character and I loved the many aspects to their identity. They actually remind me a bit of one of my students and it made me a little weepy. Also their dad, Junius, is probably the best adult to ever exist in a YA book ever? Like...I love him so much. He's aroace and so supportive and loving and absolutely there for Sam and takes in Sam's new friends like they are his own. I just really am here for a supportive father!

All of the side characters were also amazing. I loved all of them. Shep is an adorable and wonderful love interest and I just want to give her a hug and tell her everything will be okay! I also loved Sky and Aidan and the supportive teachers and other friends that they had throughout the book.

I highly highly recommend this one!

Content Warnings
Graphic: Biphobia, Violence, Bullying, Transphobia, Death, Panic attacks/disorders, and Hate crime
Moderate: Gaslighting, Medical content, Toxic friendship, and Murder
Minor: Ableism and Self harm

Things I loved about this book: queer and autistic representation. I wish books like this had been around when I was younger. I would absolutely recommend this book to people who love YA. Personally I like things a bit more mature, but I can absolutely see how others would love this.

Sam is eighteen, non-binary, and on the autism spectrum. Because of a traumatic experience Sam and their dad move to Oregon to a house where a teen boy died thirty years ago. Sam has long been fascinated by kids who died before they turned nineteen and therefore want to investigate the death of the teenage boy. But then they meet resistance.

The relationship between Sam and their dad is absolutely heartwarming. I love the messages it sends about foster parents . I really loved the mystery part of this as well. It doesn't really ramp up until past 25% or so since Sam is busy trying to fit into school and get used to a new town. But I loved the investigation once it started. It was so gripping and I loved how I was kept guessing until the end.

We need more characters like Sam a huge thank you to Maya MacGregor for creating such an amazingly diverse, relevant and relatable character to help represent so many different readers!

Id also like to thank netgalley and publishers for providing an arc so that I may share my honest feedback. I am so in love with this story and I know you will be too!

Content warning: hate crime, homophobia, misgendering (challenged), racism, stalking, murder, anaphylaxis, death of a child, PTSD, anxiety

Autistic, non-binary Sam Sylvester left Montana with their single dad, Junius, after nearly escaping a hate crime with their life. They move into the former home of Billy Clement, a teen who died of an allergic reaction thirty years prior. Sam collects half-lived lives, stories about teens who didn’t live to nineteen. They take the opportunity for not only a fresh start but also to solve the murder with their group of queer friends. But when they get closer to the truth, someone works really hard not to ensure they don’t reach it.

With an excellent, multi-dimensional cast and incredible exploration of chosen family, this mystery will tug at the heartstrings and frazzle the nerves until its very deserved happy-for-now ending.

For every bit of joy to be found within this book’s pages, there is an equal amount of hardship. There is the joy of finding your people for the first time, but also the incredible heartbreak in the form of not being able to trust those new connections. Junius is one of the most incredible dads I’ve read about in any book, but there is still the parent-child rift between him and Sam, especially the ways their lived experiences diverge. This tug and pull at the heartstrings makes for incredible pacing, especially as Sam and friends get closer to uncovering what really happened to Billy Clements.

The queer rep in this book is simply beautiful. I love the dynamic among Sam, Shep, and Sky, but also the way they interact with the non-queer kids around them. The contrast between Sam’s Montana life and Oregon life are stark but there are similar echoes of non-familiarity to queerness among those outside of Sam’s circle. It lend well both to awkwardness but also life-threatening terror. The way MacGregor allows room for typical high school experiences like a school dance amid Sam dealing with PTSD. MacGregor also seems to understand how teens relate to each other, especially with the way Sam group chats with their friends and uses Tumblr as an outlet.

I am not of the correct marginalization to comment on the autistic rep, but I will say that the book brings it up as another facet of Sam. It’s got nothing to do with the plot, but everything to do with Sam as a person. The fact that it is relevant at all turns of both the story and character development is really well-executed.

Given that the author is also queer and autistic, I trusted them to not have the story end in tragedy. The pieces of the mystery also come together in a satisfying way. But my lord, was I in tears over the hope in the ending, and how there is more to life than just the inevitability of death.

For some reason my e-arc decided to not format correctly making this not possible to read. I tried fixing it but my technological skills are mediocre at best.

Alas, I hope everyone enjoys this book! The representation of what this book provides is what had me interested in it from the beginning. Hopefully when the book is released I’ll be able to come back and provide a proper review!

This was incredible! I loved Sam and their story so dang much. I loved all the big issues this book tackled, how Sam was nonbinary and autistic and ace-spec and how none of those things was caused by the others. I loved how they were such a whole person and how they encompassed all these different identities. I just loved everything about them, and my heart broke for what they had experienced, how someone they had trusted had betrayed them and how they had nearly died as a result. I freaking loved their father and how amazing he was and the fact that he was aro/ace (umm, can I just take a moment to screech about how excited I was to have both these character be ace-spec? It made me so dang happy). I loved the close relationship between Sam and their father and how their father always had their back. Shep was great and I loved how sweet she and Sam were together. Sky was awesome, and I loved Aidan (and no, of course I wasn't waiting for Sky and Aidan to get together....). The mystery in this book was insane and I liked how things turned out, how we discovered the murderer and how it wasn't exactly the person we expected. I loved everything about this lovely story and how it was about living your life after something terrible, about how you're allowed to live, to breathe, to be.

Sam and their awesome adoptive dad Junius move abruptly after experiencing a hate crime. Their new house has a dark past: thirty years ago, a teen named Billy died there in what everyone keeps calling a tragic accident. Sam already knows about Billy due to their obsession with memorializing dead teenagers. Maybe that's why their autistic sensitivity transforms into ESP where Billy is concerned. They also get some serious vibes around their new neighbor Shep, who is just as determined to find out what really happened. It's a toss-up whether the threatening messages they receive are due to bigotry or Billy's case. Excellent relationships rather overshadow the slow-moving mystery.

TW: hate crimes, violence.
Part murder mystery, part survival story, part celebration of life and love. Sam Sylvester is a non-binary 18 year old with autism that has been through multiple traumas, but found ways to triumph through each of them. Sam's past has brought them to a new high school in a. new town and hopefully a new start. But when Sam discovers that there is an unsolved murder in her town, the new start begins looking a lot like the past. Threats seem to lurk everywhere and Sam can't always tell who to trust. Sam feels compelled to solve the mystery and ends up finding themself along the way. This book is compulsively readable while being honest and real. Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an advanced digital copy of this book.

This is a lovely piece of #ownvoices writing and an exciting mystery. I enjoyed both the pacing of the mystery and the details the author wove into it. Additionally, being able to read something where the main character was both autistic and nonbinary was great, and I was excited for that alone! I'll definitely snag a hard copy of this when it comes out and read it again.