I’m struggling to find the right words to describe this story. It is a terrifying, beautiful, heartbreaking, hope filled story. Told from multiple view points (although NOT alternating chapters) the story unfolds to reveal new information just when it can do the most emotional damage- and I mean that in the best possible way. You want the characters… all of them, to find their path, to find salvation, to find peace… even when you know they might not all deserve it, even when you know that it’s seemingly impossible for that ending to be reached.

I finished reading a few hours ago and my heart and my head are still trying to untangle my emotions on this one. But in the end what matters is that this is a story that digs into you and refuses to let go. I can’t wait for everyone to read it.

Thanks to Netgalley and publishers for a copy of this book.
This is an epic dystopian horror, that highlights the dangers of cult religion, and what could occur if they managed to take over and kill most of the population, in order to cleanse the planet.
Benji our MC is their "secret weapon", but the religious sect refuse to accept he is trans.
His father helps him escape, and soon he meets a group of the "heretics", a group of LGBTQI+ fighting for their survival.
What follows is a great tale full of horror and gore, while Benji breaks away from his "beliefs" and finds himself along the way.
It's detailed in its descriptions, and I'm intrigued to see if there will be any additions to the story in the future.
An enjoyable read.

I devoured this novel in two days. I couldn’t stop reading.

Smarter people than me could analyze this book and pull at the many threads of metaphor that make up the post-apocalyptic plague world of Acheson—the role of queer communities in one’s self-discovery and acceptance, the liberation of being seen, the power of trauma over one’s thoughts and choices, the cruel, crushing, silencing violence of society against queer folks and transgender people especially.
As for me, I dove in this book almost squealing with glee: a gay, transgender main character? Yes please. An autistic love interest who’s not only gorgeous but also deadly with a gun? Hell YES. A community of queer kids against the rest of the world, seeking sweet, sweet revenge against those who put them down all their lives? I knew I needed to get my hands on HFWU *immediately*.

And I’m so glad I did. I was rooting for Benji from the very first pages, and by the end of the first chapters I was rooting for all the kids at the ALC, too. Benji’s experience of being trans, Nick’s realistic, compassionate portrayal, left me feeling *seen.* This is the kind of book I wish I had in my hands when I was fifteen. I’m so glad today’s teenagers and young adults can have access to stories that represent them in the role of the hero. On the side that *wins* in the end.

Not only that, but the novel is so well-written. I couldn’t put it down. The pacing was perfect, the descriptions made me picture everything so clearly (too clearly, at times), and I *felt* Benji’s every emotion in my bones. This is a brilliant debut, and I can’t wait to see what else the author will write. Congratulations, really.

**Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for a free eARC in exchange for an honest review!**

HFWU opens with a quite literal bang. I mean, an explosion of soft pink matter and visceral, ostentatious morbidity. In fact, the novel as a whole is page after page of intimately and vividly described body horror. I applaud White's ability to twist tendons, crack bones along their joints and liquify skin into puddles of goo. While perhaps not a conscious intention, I felt that Benji's experience as a bioweapon mirrored the grotesque reality of human experimentation in likeness of Unit 731.

The rage of Benji, Nick and the rest of the ALC (pronounced as a word with a hard c not as individual letters) is potent through every lithe of script. It is reminiscent of the rage I felt reading Xiran Jay Zhao's Iron Widow--another YA SFF written by a Trans author with a protagonist full of vengeance, ambition and horrid, soot-black anger.

The pacing of the novel is fast. Each plot point follows the next seamlessly and there is seldom a dull moment. I was hooked anytime the Angels and Benji (with or without the ALC) faced off and was invested in the macabre of Benji's slow but sure physical decay into a living monstrosity.

The side characters we see often, Erin, Aisha, Faith, Cormac and Salvador are all unique in personality and even characters with smaller parts like Sadaf and Alex are given enough nuance that as reader, makes it easy to gauge their personalities. They were truly a found family that was so much fun to tag along with as they struggle together in a world passively trying to kill them as the months number on.

Nick was a brilliant character and I wish we had more of his POV. The inconsistent POV shifts were a narrative choice, and they fit well into the development of the story, yet I still find myself, even after finishing the book, holding out for more of Nick as a main character. His story was intriguing and I would have loved to experience how he became the way he is.

YA as a whole is prided on its romance and I once again applaud White for creating a believable teenage experience. Hey, its fiction, a post-apocalyptic one at that, I certainly enjoy all the creative liberties authors take in developing romance plots but it's such a breath of fresh air to see an author let the feelings of their characters develop organically and realistically.

I felt like the friendship between Benji and Nick was completely believable and the the nudges of a maybe relationship in their futures was exactly how their friendship would progress.

This aside, there were a few issues I had with HFWU that stops it from topping off at 5 stars.

One thing that was glaringly obvious in a book with so much diversity in its character range was the lack of Asian American characters. This was weird considering how White made good efforts in putting other POC characters within the cast.

Another thing that rubbed me a little wrong was the first interactions the ALC has with the Vanguard.

The Vanguard is described as being composed of mostly white, middle-upper class families and the ALC depends on them for supplies. The character Salvador is Latino and uses xe/xem pronouns. While interacting with the Vanguard Benji notes this:

"A guy in the back eyes Cormac like a competitor...Another stares at Salvador as if he's trying to figure xem out, which has so many racist and transphobic implications that the air goes thick with it."

??? I was and still am so lost by this one statement. Benji, you just met Salvador not even a whole day ago. You also probably have no idea why that one dude's looking at xem why would you assume the worst right away? Transphobic I could see yeah, this is an LGBTQ+ center by how is he looking at Salvador in a racist way? I don't get it. I'd like someone to explain that part to me because I truly am at a loss.

Calvin was also a bit of a completely pointless character. I am all in for discussing and representing transphobia and gatekeeping within the trans and LGBTQ+ community but not when it feels as meaningless and forced as Calvin.

I mentioned before that the pacing of the novel is fast and emphasized this was good for the plot points. It was good for the plot points alone. Benji warms up to the ALC so quickly for someone whose lived in a literal cult for five years and has every reason to be very untrustworthy of the motives of people around him. I mean, it's great that Benji fits right in with them, he is a queer teen after all and so are the rest of the ALC for the most part but that alone doesn't make up for how easily Benji slides right into the ALC. The fast pace of the novel is in part aided by the fact that much of what happens is told to us through Benji's eyes rather than shown to us. Much of the interesting world building (especially of that on the Flood and New Nazareth) is simply told through Benji without actually explaining in detail the nitty gritty of these crucial factors.

The last critique I want to point out is the final few chapters of the book. the rising action, the climax and our conclusion. They were settled in a fashion bordering deus ex machina. There was so much abysmal horror in describing New Nazareth and characters like Mother Woodside and Sister Kipling that when they came and went...it fell flat and I felt that they were sorely wasted.

Mother Woodside had me coiled in anger when she deadnamed Benji. It felt like a terrible, sharp punch in the gut. I wanted to see her teeter on the edge of truly disgusting. I wanted to see Sister Kipling shatter in despair over her realization that everything she has done has been a tragic, brutal and senseless blitzkrieg.

That being said, this is a book that is about 400 pages long and thus, I do understand that in its ambition it had a lot of ground to cover. There was a narrative White wanted to tell and he did so successfully.

I have complaints over telling rather than showing but White does a tremendous job of creating atmosphere and is insanely talented in detailing all things body horror and vengeful, putrid rage. Those aspects alone drew me in and held me down while I finished this book in one sitting. I adore that vision, the members of the ALC and Benji and Nick much more than any critique I've had.

I am ecstatic to have read this book and will value having it on my shelf. I love White's short stories and so I know that he is capable of amazing things. This is a debut and its good, very good. So, I know that as White matures as an author and becomes even more familiar with novelistic writing that his work will only get better and better.

(maybe hoping for a very gore infested very body horror, very queer adult SFF in the future ;)?)

due to my complete lack of understanding of the catholic church, a decent amount of this book didn't really make sense to me (i wasn't aware reading the blurb that the cult was based on a section of the catholic church) and i would like to note that the whole monster/plague/disease thing is extremely confusing and didn't make much sense to me. i really like the queer rep though it felt a bit unnecessary to instantly put a label on everyone the moment they are introduced (too many characters too many labels and too little personality). there is no 'showing' just 'telling', if it doesn't bother you that's fine!!! tbh it's just a huge pet peeve of mine because it feels like authors are trying to force representation for the sake of it without actually giving them personalities.

some statements irk me a little, and even though white has clearly tried his best to portray poc characters there's some part of it that feels a bit off to me.

i'm not autistic and i personally do not identify with the label trans (though i am gnc) so i cannot speak on the portrayal of it and i really hope someone else can (how is it?) there is definitely a part of it that speaks to me though.

i couldn't really connect with the characters sometimes and benji doesn't make much sense as someone who has been in a cult all his life (warming up to ALC so quickly makes no sense...?) but it gets better after the 50% mark and i actually started seeing the characters as fully fleshed out people.

sorry for the negative review i just did not like the vibes of it. (less)

Runaway trans teen Benji, infected with a bioweapon by a cult whose actions have decimated the world, is rescued by autistic sharpshooter Nick and his ragtag band of friends from what remains of their city's LGBTQ+ Centre. Together, they agree to wreak vengeance on their enemies. But Benji is steadily mutating into something horrific, and with Nick hiding plenty of secrets of his own, how long before this fledgling bond of trust shatters?

This book is something else, honestly. Gloriously violent and literally dripping with body horror on almost every page, it felt like Resident Evil meets The Last of Us meets Seraph of the End, but make everyone confirmed queer. The unapologetic viciousness of the book is its greatest strength, in my opinion, like a neverending howl of rage. The world and concept is fascinating, although I think more could have been done with these aspects of the story when it came to the strength of the characters.

For my tastes there were a few too many people 'floating around' without a purpose, and I felt the use of certain characters could have been tightened up a little. I loved the chapters told from NIck's point of view and I felt like he was criminally underused. I wish the thematic progression of Benji's abusive relationship had been stronger, because there are some beautiful lines regarding this aspect of the plot. Overall I felt somewhat disappointed that Benji needed saving so often. I could forgive it at the beginning of the story, but I had hoped that for someone with so much potential power, he would come into his own in a more emotionally fulfilling or impactful way, With that said, I feel like this is a fairly 'grey-and-grey' world in the sense that everything is pretty much terrible, and it's a sliding scale of how bad it is, so I understand if my expectations for something a little more hopeful or uplifting were misplaced. In the end, the utter visceral carnage of Hell Followed with Us carries the book, and if you feel up to the challenge, I think you'll love it.

Definitely be aware of content warnings for misgendering and repeated on-page deadnaming (it's made absolutely clear in the narrative that this is unacceptable); gore and body horror; abusive family dynamics and an abusive relationship. The author has included a full list of content warnings on Goodreads.

I am grateful to the publisher and NetGalley for providing a free eARC of Hell Followed with Us. These opinions are my own.

Thank you to PeachTree Teen and NetGalley for providing me with an eARC for review.

I just want to start off by saying this book has been a HIGHLY anticipated read for me since the cover dropped last year. Getting to read it early made me realize, it’s so much better then I ever could have imagined. Holy crap, wow, and every other exclamation.

Hell Followed With Us focuses on Benji, a trans boy who was raised in a religious compound, as he deals with his inevitable transformation into a monstrous creature called Seraph. I adored Benji’s character and was obsessed with the absolutely unhinged amount of gore throughout the novel. Hell Followed With Us was like the book I had been looking for but wasn’t aware I needed (like seriously, so much blood).

I got Agnes at the End of the World (book) vibes meets VERY gay Bloodborne (video game). So if that sounds like something you’d enjoy, PLEASE pre-order this book because it was just amazing

I received a copy of this book from Netgalley and Peachtree Teen.

I was entranced by the cover of this book and the contents did not disappoint.

Fair warning: the body horror in this book is strong. Like incredibly gruesome. Make sure to check out the content warnings provided by the author!

So a fundie cult has triggered the Apocalypse and infected our hero. He takes up with a group of freedom fighters.

And I really don't want to spoil it but it's so good!

Everything about this book is so amazing that I find it hard to put it in proper words. The trans (and queer) representation makes me want to cry from joy and the characters are so lovable and relatable.
I’ve never read a post-apocalyptic (or apocalyptic) book before but wow I’m amazed by this. I've been excited for this book for a long time and I’m so fortunate to be able to read it. Highly recommend, this book is the first to be added to my top 10 favorite books 2022. If I could give it more than 5 stars I would have.

short review: mouth watering imagery I'm starving

actual review:
i love trans anger entangled with horror and blood so much, I pretty much flew threw the pages. not all of this book is coherent but it's also messy teenagers. I loved the embrace of monstrousness, the way Benji is allowed to be angry as are the teenagers around him. I was immediately gripped and I finished it pretty fast because the arcs and the descriptions were so delicious. the cover fucks so hard, love is stored in the transgenderism<3 can't believe I'm saying this but more body horror, pretty please?

why not more stars then? There's a lack of coherence in the plot(or maybe my brain is just bad at comprehension), it's an amazing idea but it hinges entirely on chance to happen, like it's just too convenient for help to arrive at the exact right time and a lack of consistency in the story. I loved the fallout and the way abusive relationships are explored but I didn't buy the actual romantic plot line. I really wish Nick was more fleshed out like an actual autistic person stimming in a book literally cannot contain myself can you imagine his power if we saw him more?

I'll definitely pick up other books by Andrew though I think I'll understand more on a reread. I think there's crossover appeal, if you liked the prose of dowry of blood or wyatt from the witch king you should pick this up!

Thank you to the publisher and netgalley for a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. This did not affect my opinion in any way.

Absolutely loved this book from start to finish. Horrifying in the best way. Gripping story of finding yourself and finding your power in the face of a hateful and oppressive world. Loved it.

Hell Followed With Us is not only the angry queer horror of your dreams, but also a dark and deeply fascinating take on the end of times. An Evangelical Christian cult has unleashed Armageddon and killed billions, their goal being to eradicate humanity entirely. Sixteen-year-old trans boy Benji was raised in the cult and is a valuable asset to them, having been infected with a bioweapon that they intend to use to eradicate what's left of the human race. So when Benji runs away and takes refuge at what remains of Acheson LGBTQ+ Center with a group of queer teens, the cult isn't willing to let him go so easily.

Something about body horror seems to really resonate with trans audiences, myself included, and the connection between body horror and the trans experience was so beautifully clear in this book, I could've cried. Benji's desire to be seen as a monster, if only to avoid being perceived as feminine or a woman, especially in his particular circumstances, really hit home.

I'll have to start by saying it's the best book I have read this year so far. It had so many elements that could have turned horribly, but they turned out spectacular.

And since I don't really know where to start this review, I'll just list the things that I was afraid of, and how this book totally eased me with each page, so that maybe some people who have their doubts can give this book the chance it deserves.

- First off, I know the author is queer, but because of the book description, I was afraid it would fall under some LGBTQ+ clichés I really dislike in books, such as the obvious confrontation between religion and queer identity. I feared it would end up falling under the "religion is bad because it opposes our identities" trope even slightly, but it didn't. Actually, these two are never even opposed in the book. Benji experiences transphobia when he's with the Angels but he doesn't resent religion for it, he never does, and I'm very glad about that. Also, I think it's just a detail, but I loved the fact not every LGBTI kid in the book is magically nice just because they're queer.

- I actually like Benji. I like his anger because I can relate so much to it. I really think reading about an angry, trans character is the best thing that has ever happened to me.

- I'm not a fan of post apocalyptic stories because I often find them unbelievable, the cause of the end of the world in Hell Followed With Us felt so plausible that I actually enjoyed the settings a lot.

- The book descriptions give so much informations that I thought the book itself would get messy, but it never does. The plot advances slowly enough that it never becomes a blur, but never slow enough that it becomes boring. And though the "big" revelations in the story were pretty easy to guess, it really doesn't hinder the enjoyment of it.

I'll add that I really enjoyed the body horror dimension of the book, because I didn't expect it to be there but it was and that made Hell Followed With Us even better, an even more unique experience.

If you want a book that reads like playing Resident Evil or The Last of Us, this ones for you!

I was very excited for this book, but sadly it wasn’t quite what I expected. My main thing was the amount of body horror and gore. I knew it was in here, it was one of the things that drew me to this, but I didn’t expect the huge amount of it. Barely a page passed without some disgusting body descriptions. It was really overwhelming for me, and by the end I honestly got tired of it. And then there was all the angst and tragedy, I came for trans anger and This book left me just really sad. Every terrible thing possible happens and by the end theres no hope. And then there was just alot of things in this book that just didn’t make sense to me, mainly with the climax. How did theo transform in minutes when it took benji weeks? whats with the dream scape? why did so many people act nonchalant to his transformation when he is supposedly looking like a huge monster?

I do think theres an audience for this, one I hoped I would be a part of but sadly am not. If your interested in reading please be aware of how dark and gorey it is, because I’m a horror fan but this was to much for me. I will say as someone with severe religious trauma, it was healing to see a trans boy wipe out hundreds of evangelicals
———————————-
Rep: Trans boy, autism, mental health, mlm, characters who use neopronouns, side POC, nonbinary, sapphic, aromantic, trans fem
CW: violence, gore, arson, mass murder, genocide, death, body horror, transphobia, forced detransition, religious abuse, cults, child abuse, self injury, suicide, lots of vomiting

WoW! I have never read anything like this before in my life!
Andrew Joseph White executed HELL FOLLOWED WITH US.
The atmospheric storytelling and stellar writing was spot-on and I could almost feel the fire blazing off the pages! This was the kind of book that had me ignoring other things in my life in order to finish it.
The best YA horror book I've read. And I'm betting it will be a favorite for so damn many! As it should be.

Peachtree Teen,
Seriously thank you for this eARC.
I truly appreciate it.

Wow. That was… wow.

I’m so grateful to have gotten an arc of this because serious this book was incredible. Not only was there trans rep but also autistic rep and all the other good kinds of rep. It was amazing and gory and gross and just so so good.

As an autistic trans masc person with religious trauma, I feel like this really satisfied a itch that was deep in my brain. There was so much anger and hurt and sadness poured into this book that mirrors some of my own and I’m so thankful it exists. Not only for other trans people that went through the same thing, but for cis people to read and maybe understand a little of what some of us feel.

This is great amazing stunning spectacular. I literally tore through it. Look up trigger warning before you read this obviously but I definitely recommend checking it out once it comes out.

I went through the book so fast that I actually had to force myself to read it more slowly so I can enjoy it and be with the characters more. I think this is what people mean when they say that a book keeps them on the edge of their seats. The characters and world-building are worth noting too! I have nothing else to say this was such a fun read and I'm just speechless.