A visceral, affecting and hard read (especially for those who have struggled with their weight). It’s a vivid depiction of Harlem in the 90s, and a love letter to girls left behind in the endless struggle with food and beauty.

This is one of those books that you need to be prepared to read, but in a good way. It was a moving story about a girl growing up in a interesting time. In someways it is a book I wish I had been able to read just before I went to college. It would have been a great way to understand the changes that I would be coming up against in teh coming years.

Thank you NetGalley and W. W. Norton & Company for the ARC. This was a good coming of age read. When I first got approved to read the advance copy I was worried it was going to be a "Precious" like read. It was not but it was deep family dynamic read about the experience of a girl that was a big girl from 8 years old. Solid read and worth the read.

This was a no-holds-barred look at the realities and pain associated with growing up obese in a society that deems fat as failure. Starting from the age of 8 until age 18, we watch Malaya navigate the critiques against her body, fight the internalization of the hate, and the impact of family hurt disguised as "help." This book was largely a look into family dynamics and the coming-of-age of a girl in a hurtful world. The blurb mentions compassion, and I agree this is compassionately told, but I can imagine the on-page depiction of the infliction of body image issues and abuse over uncontrollable circumstances will be triggering for some readers, so proceed with caution. Overall, I loved the characters, I cheered Malaya through her growth, and I walked away feeling taught without feeling preached at. Very well done!

**Thank you NetGalley and W. W. Norton & Company for the eARC**

This was a heart-breaking read, and being a big girl myself, it was very emotionally challenging to read all of the micro-aggressions and adversity that Malaya faces. I thought the author perfectly captured what a fat woman experiences, so I was quite surprised by the ending of the book. The overall messaging I got from the book was being thin creates happiness and gentrification can make people healthier. Not sure that that was the intention of the author, but I really didn't enjoy that spin.

Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC.

Except for her father, the adults in Malaya’s life don’t really hear or see her. They don’t ask about her. They don’t ask what it is that she wants. They don’t focus on what she’s good at. Instead they talk for her, over her, at her, and around her and their main focus is on her size.
Big Girl is a painful glimpse into the life of a young woman living in her body and trying to just exist. It’s a story about how parents and families a lot of times set expectations for children based on their own personal failures and shortcomings.
Throughout this story, Malaya’s mom and grandmother are constantly projecting their insecurities onto her, thereby making her feel insecure. Her father doesn’t really know how to help her but he seems to be her only advocate. However, he has his own sets of health issues to deal with as well.
This story was hard to read because it’s so raw and real. I really appreciated how Sullivan did not include a lot of IF ANY dialogue for Malaya during her interactions with her mother and grandmother. It really underscored for me just how much they were not really talking to Malaya, but at her and most likely to themselves. They were so busy worried about her getting bigger and trying to do everything to make her smaller, that they rarely stopped and really saw her in the times she needed them the most. They didn’t see her talent, her ambitions, her struggling, her trying to fit in…so she had to clumsily figure these things out on her own.
It wasn’t until the end when she started to feel more confident in her own skin that she finds her voice.
There’s a lot that can be said about adults with so called good intentions especially when those “I’m just trying to help” intentions really aren’t from a place of concern but a place of personal hurt. The biggest takeaway that I got from this book was that a lot of us could desperately use some therapy to work through childhood traumas and insecurities.

Really lovely debut about a young overweight girl in Harlem in the 90s and winds us through her upbringing. I loved Mayala and the descriptions of her body, the food, the city and the 90s. I will definitely keep an eye out for more books from this author.

I don't remember where I originally found this book but I am so glad I was able to get an ARC. This was a very timely coming of age story. As someone who was shamed for her weight growing up, I needed this.

Following young Malaya for ten years, we see her struggling with her weight and the pressure of society to slim down. We see how she navigates as a plus sized girl in a world that values thinness. I really liked how Sullivan used music and what was going on in New York to document the journey. I loved being able to see Malaya grow up and find her voice.

Malaya's struggles with her weight will ring true with many. This is the story of her coming of age in the 1990s- of her life between age 8 and about age 18. Although she lives in Harlem, she goes to school on the Upper East Side, a world which feels very strange. Her life is controlled by her mother and grandmother, both of whom are obsessed with her weight but her father Percy provides a small light for her. I suspect many will recognize some of the things that Malaya's mother and grandmother say to her and how she ducks answering their questions. Then there's the food. Sullivan's descriptions are graphic and you'll get the sensations Malaya gets. And there's Shaneice, her best friend with whom she experiments and Rayshawn who breaks her heart after he forces himself on her. There's a lot packed in here but that's how life is, especially for teens. Malaya is a terrific character, wholly sympathetic and - no pun intended- well rounded. Thanks to Netgalley for the ARC. Great read.

Big Girl is the story of 8 year old Malaya who is at a Weight Watcher's meeting as this novel opens. Set in Harlem in the 90's, we watch Malaya as she grows up and faces life. Her journey is not an easy one but as I made the journey with her I visited a world unlike and yet similar to my own. You can feel Malaya's pain as you read this book and the characters around Malaya are so well developed as is the sense of the time and space. I appreciate author's skill and look forward to her next book..

Thanks to NetGalley for an advance copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Of this debut novel, Kiese Laymon has said: “I know I have just read and reread a new American classic that we as a culture and country desperately need.” Big Girl centers Malaya, an eight-year-old girl living in Harlem with her parents in the 1990s. Malaya is a lot of things: artistic, imaginative, creative, intelligent and sensitive. Unfortunately what most others focus on – including her family – is her weight. This is a masterfully written portrait of Malaya’s evolution through teasing, Weight Watchers, judgment, loss and mistrust, into self-acceptance, clarity and liberation.

A fabulous book that chronicles one girl's lifelong struggle with her weight, among other things. I would have given it 5 starts but found the ending disappointing. We worth readsing.

This is a poignant coming of age portrait of a large African American girl growing up In 1980's -1990's that is painted with empathy, humor and boldness. Vivid and poetically written in such a way that involving all five sense..

Boy, I really struggled with this one. The blurb said it was compassionate and I did not find it to be that way at all. I'd really caution fat people who want to read this book to tread carefully. The narration of the book really emphasized things like the oiliness or greasiness of what Malaya was eating in ways that seemed meant to create a sense of disgust. The way her body described and the words use to talk about how she moved also seemed meant to elicit disgust. I haven't seen anyone saying similar in any other reviews so maybe I'm too sensitive??? I don't know.

The blurb also promised Malaya had an unforgettable voice. It seemed such an odd choice to me that she almost never actually speaks. I definitely rooted for her, but I didn't feel like she had much of a voice at all, I think because my aforementioned problems with the narration separated me from Malaya's sense of self. I honestly struggle to understand why she speaks so little.

People who have experienced cruelty as children regarding fatness will certainly hear the greatest hits in this book, so as far as verisimilitude, it has it. Malaya's grandmother said things to her that my own grandmother said to me, word for word.

As far as Malaya's arc, there's just a lot of terrible things for a long time. I kept waiting for things to feel like they were going to pick up for her. They do in about the last 10 percent of the book, but in a way that I did not find remotely satisfying and it would spoil the book to say too much else.

In Big Girl by Mecca Jamilah Sullivan, our main character is Malaya, an overweight girl living in 1990s Harlem. We follow Malaya’s struggles with her relationship with food, her parents, grandmother, and peers.

This is a character driven story and is filled with vivid descriptions. All the characters are so well-developed that they seem real. The imagery of Malaya’s New York neighborhood jumps off the page. Additionally, the food descriptions and hip-hop song references make this book a full sensory experience.

Big Girl is a fantastic debut novel, and I’ll be looking forward to anything Sullivan publishes in the future. Check it out if you enjoy bildungsroman or 1990s vibes.

What a heartbreakingly beautiful story! Mecca Jamilah Sullivan's "Big Girl" truly impacted me more than any book has in a very long time. It made me cry, laugh, angry and made me think about my own life and reflect on things that have gotten me to where I am and made me who I have become. There are themes in this book that are universal and relatable to so many, but also so intimate and personal that it will really hit some of us right in the feels.

At eight years old, Malaya's mother is dragging her to Weight Watchers meetings, when she'd much rather be at home painting in her room or hanging out with her friends on the streets of Harlem. Under the constant pressure from her mother and her predominantly white upper class school to lose weight, Malaya is unable to stick to the program and for the next several years she continues to gain weight. So much so that she stops attending school and cuts herself off from the world. But then a family tragedy forces her to take a look at her life and find out who she truly is, outside of the expectations of her family, society and even herself.

Oh I so loved this book! Sullivan is a phenomenal writer, and if this is her debut I will most definitely be checking out her future works. Her story flows so well, almost as if it's written in prose with its vivid imagery and detail, it elicits some kind of emotion response from every word. The MC Malaya was written beautifully. An introvert to those around her, yet to the reader she is dynamic, smart, sensitive, funny, insecure yet trying her hardest to find out exactly who she is. This is such a wonderful coming of age story. One that takes the reader through every major milestone of growing up, yet really puts a personal aspect on all the events. Will everyone relate to what Malaya is going through? I think yes. We've all been there in some way, we know her pain and her struggles, which makes it so much more enjoyable when we get to see her triumphs.

I especially enjoyed how Sullivan uses the gentrification of Harlem and the surge of hip hop and r&b of the 90s to reflect Malaya's journey. As her city changes, she struggles to find her identity. She struggles to go against the intergenerational pressure from her mother and grandmother to be thin, to get a good man and be a good wife. Through the music of Biggie Smalls and Aaliyah she finds two prophets who she believes speak her truth, yet she can't find that voice in herself. I love that this novel takes you through about ten/twelve years of this woman's life. We get to really see her grow up, grow into herself and find her way. Its not just one instant in her life that makes her the person she becomes to be, but so many, many instances. And it's lovely to be able to see those moments shape her, for better or for worse.

I would highly recommend this book...well, to everyone! I think there is something her for everyone to relate to. It's entertaining and engaging, personal and intimate. Thank you Net Galley and WW Norton & Company for giving me an advanced copy.

Thank you to NetGalley for my first ARC, in return here is my review.

Big Girl is a snapshot of about 10 years in Malaya Clondon’s life. The eight-year-old resident of Harlem has a big problem. She’s an immensely obese girl living in a world that ties women’s worth to the size of their bodies.

On paper her life looks pretty idyllic – loving and caring parents, comfortable lifestyle, a solid best friend, and the exceptionally smart Black child attends and excels at an upper east side school for gifted children. Although she faces the usual problems most adolescents face, Malaya finds her ever-growing size presents challenges of its own not the least of which is finding ways to get more food.

In in a world that is already unkind to girls, particularly Black girls, Malaya’s mother and grandmother routinely quiz her about how faithful she’s been to the never-ending string of diets they put her on. The clever child always provides the answers she knows will make the two women happy. But the questions never end.

Through her actions, and not necessarily her words, first-time author Mecca Jamilah Sullivan does a great job of showing us how Malaya navigates a world that’s particularly cruel to Big Girls.

This book completely captured my imagination. Sullivan created a Bildungsroman that is profoundly relatable, in spite of the protagonist being 8 years old for a third of the book.

Malaya is fat, black, and not convinced that the grown women in her life have it all figured out. The book opens when she is a kid, attending Weight Watchers meetings with her mother and enduring the cruel and invasive attention of her peers (and most upsetting, her grandmother.) The character development in this book is breathtaking. Malaya is keenly observant of the changes in herself, her parents (and their marriage) and the neighborhood around her. Malaya’s sense of awareness is thanks to Sullivan deftly creating a main character who misses nothing, is generous and forgiving of the missteps of those around her, and is ultimately true to herself and her passions.

This book was, in turns, liberating to read, heartbreaking, fascinating, and gave me so much hope for young girls forced to shoulder the expectations and dreams of those around them.

This extraordinary debut novel, set in 1990s Harlem, is an unforgettable, incredibly moving, and deeply insightful coming of age story about a young Black girl

Malaya deals with many stresses in her life: her weight, her family's unhelpful practices and cruel remarks, being one of the few Black students in her predominately white prep school, along with all the other complications of being a maturing child/teen. Malaya is a remarkable and vibrant character; this is one of the best novels, let alone a debut novel, that I've read in a long time.

Many thanks to W.W. Norton & Co and NetGalley for a digital review copy in exchange for an honest review.

I received an advance review copy of this ebook for free from W.W. Norton & Co. and NetGalley, and I am leaving this review voluntarily as a courtesy.

Growing up in Harlem isn't easy, especially for Malaya Clondon, a big Black girl attending a predominately white Upper East Side prep school under the watchful eyes of her mother and grandmother. Bigger than most kids her age, Malaya is dragged to Weight Watchers meetings by her mother and subjected to the sharp criticism of her grandmother, her weight constantly under surveillance and a source of shame. Malaya must find her own way and it's not until after tragedy strikes that she is able to find the freedom she so desperately seeks from her own body.

Mecca Jamilah Sullivan's debut novel is a story that we all need to read. Sullivan eloquently describes the barriers and struggles that Black girls face in a world that is intent on beating them down. This character-driven story challenges (white) societal standards, racism, misogynoir, and homophobia while uplifting the thoughts and feelings of an obese teenage Black girl. I was in tears throughout the book. I don't care who you are. Everyone needs to read this book!

Reps of note: Black girl/woman struggles & joy, LGBTQ+, fat/big girls/women