This is probably my favorite that Aidan Thomas has done. I love the world that has gender and sexuality as just a fact of life--all fantasy should be that way. I also love how very clearly they weave Latinx culture throughout the book. To me, the ending was super rushed--I read the ebook and at 85% of the way through nothing major had happened yet--and I don't know that the tension and the stakes feel high enough. But overall, again, probably my favorite Aidan Thomas one.

An imaginative beginning to a whirlwind duology set in a Meso-American inspired fantasy world, "The Sunbearer Trials" is perfectly tailored for fans of "Percy Jackson & The Olympians", "The Hunger Games", and readers looking for an extra splash of LGBTQ+ representation.

Aiden Thomas’ wows with this epic story about Teo’s journey as he navigates the trials, literal and metaphorical, that face him as he attempts to win a dangerous competition, fulfill an ancient rite, and learn to embrace his identity fearlessly. Teo is trans. But Teo is also a Jade: a semidiós (demigod) of a lower rank. The Golds get the responsibility, the respect, and the prestige. At least the ritual that requires ten semidióses to compete for the honor of being Sunbearer and to avoid the misfortune of being the honorary sacrifice to the sun god Sol every decade, is left to the Golds… or it was until Teo was one of two Jades to be chosen for the first time in more than a hundred years.

I can’t wait for the next book! Aiden Thomas’s writing just can’t disappoint! "The Sunbearer Trials" is everything I could hope for: fantastical, mythological, hilarious, sweet, romantic, and most importantly self-affirming. I definitely recommend you pick this one up!

I an unable to review this title, as it was archived before I had a chance to download and read it. This feedback is only to stop this title from adversely affecting my netgalley feedback rate. If in the future I have the opportunity to read this title, I will post a proper review here.

Disclaimer: I received this e-arc from the publisher and bought two copies of the finished book. Thanks and support your authors! All opinions are my own.

Book: The Sunbearer Trials

Author: Aiden Thomas

Book Series: The Sunbearer Duology Book 1

Rating: 3.5/5

Diversity: Hispanic Trans MC, Hispanic Trans-Questioning character, Hispanic characters, Black Hispanic characters, Deaf Black Hispanic character, Non-binary Hispanic character, Black Hispanic Lesbian character.

Recommended For...: young adult readers, fantasy, mythology, Mexican mythology, LGBT, queer

Publication Date: September 6, 2022

Genre: YA Fantasy

Age Relevance: 15+ (cursing, parental death, racism, classism, religion, death, grief, violence, body dysphoria)

Explanation of Above: There is some cursing in this book. There is violence shown in the book and death. There’s parental death mentioned. There is some racism, prejudice, and classism shown in the book. The book is based off of Mexican mythology and gods are shown and mentioned. There is some grief shown. There is a scene where body dysphoria discussed.

Publisher: Feiwel & Friends

Pages: 401

Synopsis: As each new decade begins, the Sun’s power must be replenished so that Sol can keep traveling along the sky and keep the evil Obsidian gods at bay. Ten semidioses between the ages of thirteen and eighteen are selected by Sol himself as the most worthy to compete in The Sunbearer Trials. The winner carries light and life to all the temples of Reino del Sol, but the loser has the greatest honor of all―they will be sacrificed to Sol, their body used to fuel the Sun Stones that will protect the people of Reino del Sol for the next ten years.

Teo, a 17-year-old Jade semidiós and the trans son of Quetzal, goddess of birds, has never worried about the Trials…or rather, he’s only worried for others. His best friend Niya―daughter of Tierra, the god of earth―is one of the strongest heroes of their generation and is much too likely to be chosen this year. He also can’t help but worry (reluctantly, and under protest) for Aurelio, a powerful Gold semidiós and Teo’s friend-turned-rival who is a shoo-in for the Trials. Teo wouldn’t mind taking Aurelio down a notch or two, but a one-in-ten chance of death is a bit too close for Teo’s taste.

But then, for the first time in over a century, Sol chooses a semidiós who isn’t a Gold. In fact, he chooses two: Xio, the 13-year-old child of Mala Suerte, god of bad luck, and…Teo. Now they must compete in five mysterious trials, against opponents who are both more powerful and better trained, for fame, glory, and their own survival.

Review: I really liked this book for the most part. The book revolves our MC who is a semidios in a world where every decade a trial is replenish the sun’s power and keep the evil gods at bay. However, one person must be sacrificed in the trial and their body is used for fuel for the sun stones to protect the people for the next decade. Our MC is selected for the trial and the book goes through his journey through the trials and trying to figure out the best way through this predicament. I thought overall that the story was great and I was interested in it throughout the read. The book reminds me a lot of Percy Jackson and it’s like it and The Hunger Games had a baby. The characters are well written and the book has amazingly detailed world building.

However, the book takes awhile to get into and the amount of characters in the book is very overwhelming. I did have to read the synopsis to understand the basics of the book and the prologue made me a tad more confused than I thought it would.

Verdict: It was good! I highly recommend it!

I won this book for I think yallwest or YallFest one of those but gosh it took me so long to get to it. I’m happy I finally got to enjoy it and finished it.

The story line was an underdog story, and I’m a sucker for it. Aiden hits some topics on here that I hope will give others comfort and allow them to be seen. I truely enjoyed this, it was action packed in this found family/betrayal combo and it really had me wanting friends but then I remembered I don’t mix well with others 😂

That ending was one I didn’t see coming and it’s one that has my full interest and I’m ready for book 2!

Quick Stats
Age Rating: 13+
Over All: 4.25 stars
Plot: 4.5/5
Characters: 4.5/5
Setting: 4/5
Writing: 3.5/5

This is definitely my favorite of Aiden Thomas’s books so far. It was fun and fast, and the diversity of representation was immaculate. I absolutely loved Teo. He’s such a compelling main character. It’s impossible not to love him and root for him. It was easy to become invested in him and in Niya, Xio, and Aurelio. Aiden Thomas truly exceeds at crafting characters.
The plot of this book was also super interesting. It wasn’t the most unique take on a trial-based plot, but it was still easy to remain engaged. It never lagged or bored me. There were a few places where the pacing was a little bit too fast. I felt like I had whiplash.
The largest downfall of this book was the writing and portrayal of emotions. Sometimes, I felt like the way Teo’s emotional state was described was very… distant. Telling, not showing. It made those instances hard to connect to. It was like, the more intense the emotion should’ve been, the less I was able to connect with the way it was written. I also had an issue with other characters making little sense and lashing out randomly. Like, I understand some of those instances were explained later, but others don’t fit that explanation and were just… jarring and took me out of the story. The most significant instance was Diosa Lumbre’s reaction to Teo’s theory. That was just too much, and it took me out of the story.
The writing itself was mostly good, but sometimes it felt a little too cringey, a little too juvenile. I understand that this is a YA book, so the characters are going to act like teenagers, but Teo is 17, and sometimes his internal monologue and just the narration itself felt much more middle school level than upper high school. I just found it to be a bit lacking.
However, this is definitely the strongest of Aiden Thomas’s books. With Lost in the Never Woods, I found the plot and pacing to be very slow and boring, the characters not compelling enough. With Cemetery Boys, I loved Yadriel and Julien, I loved the world and magic, but the plot itself, the mystery, was very obvious from early on to me, in a way that made the aspects regarding “solving” it rather annoying. I had none of those issues with The Sunbearer Trials. The twist at the end completely shocked me. I knew something was coming, of course, but I did not expect what happened. I will definitely be picking up book 2, and I do highly recommend this one.

What started out with a prologue to rival most young adult prologues (in which the reader was thrown headfirst into a vibrant creation story, full of diversity and promise), quickly got overwhelmed by the sheer size of the main cast.

I loved CEMETERY BOYS, Aiden Thomas' debut, and was looking forward to this one, which is their third published work, especially when I saw the diversity of the cast on their Instagram. It's rare that trans and nonbinary characters get to simply exist on page and to see a cast fully made up of queer and genderqueer characters was a dream come true. And it did deliever on that page.

However, the size of the cast deeply disrupted my reading experience. The characters read largely the same and spoke with the same 2020-2022 inspired lingo that will be outdated in five years. I understand the attempt made here - writing teenage characters in a 2022-adjacent fantasy world requires them to speak like 2022-adjacent teenagers. However, and this could just be a pet-peeve, it made them feel juvenille. Like I was scrolling through Twitter replies instead of reading a book. Similarly, I didn't find any of them to be particularly fleshed out, which could also be because of the large cast. They all felt one-note, as if Thomas was also having trouble balancing them all on page.

The informality of their speech also caused a weird cognitive dissonance. In that, there were potentially dangerous things happening that I couldn't grasp the stakes of based on how the characters were conducting themselves and speaking about those occurances.

I wanted so deeply to get invested in Teo and Aurelio, but at the end of the day, I just didn't care, which is disappointing considering how invested I was in Yadriel and Julien (the mlm pair in Cemetery Boys).

Overall, I think this book fell flat for me because of the Cemetery Boys effect. Because Cemetery Boys was so amazing, this one couldn't be simply because everything about it felt like it was taking a step back (from the writing to the dialogue, to my inability to connect to the plot or the characters). However, I gave it a solid three stars and am planning on reading the sequel. The ending, at least, brought me back and I'm not ready to give up on the series just yet.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher, Macmillan Children's Publishing Group, Feiwel & Friends for this eARC for review!

5/5 stars!!!!!

Oh my god??? OH MY GOD??? I can't believe it took me this long to get to this but this just became one of my new favorite books! This was such a fun ride from start to finish, but it was also so intense and so stressful! This was so beautifully written. Aiden has such a way with describing emotion, environment, and action that gets the ready fully enveloped into the story. I absolutely LOVED the growing friendship and comradery between the semi-dioses, and how intense the competition was. The challenges were so intense and refreshing! The magic system was absolutely invigorating, lush, and thorough while also being easy to understand. I also loved that gender identity and sexuality were so fluid, understood and accepted in society, and actually part of the overall culture itself. It was so refreshing and heartwarming! I spent so much of the book laughing, cheering, hand-to-heart warm and fuzzies, and also absolutely SCREAMING at the end of the book. The wait for book 2 is going to be AGONY, but I can't wait!

*Note I have received a free ARC of this book. This will not affect my thoughts or feelings toward it*

Where do I even start!?!? I LOVED this book so much! First of the world building was FANTASTIC. I felt like I knew how their world worked and could imagine every new and exciting location perfectly. The trials they go through were thought out perfectly. I really enjoyed the message that Thomas was able to deliver about teamwork and how completing a task isn't always the way to "win". The chemistry the characters had with each other was bouncing off the walls non-stop. This book was surprisingly super funny but had its really deep moments and both delivered every time. My only complaint about this book was the start was slow but once it starts going it's a fun party that never stops!

Overall a solid 4.5/5 rounded up!

I LOVED this book!

Why? Well, Teo is a fantastic protagonist. He's spunky and lovable and undergoes a great amount of development. There are a ton of fun, interesting side characters that I enjoyed the hell out of and rooted for. Niya was such a joy, Xio a sweetheart, and Aurelio pulled at the heartstrings. I can't wait to see what they're up to in book 2.

The competition itself lent great tension throughout the story then, when broken up by the quieter moments in-between, it all created a solid pace that always left me wanting more. I absolutely tore through this book and, while satisfied with the ending, I cannot wait for book two. Speaking of the ending, that was great. There were surprises along the way and I feel like book 1 has its own satisfying ending while leaving plenty of want for the next book. A tight rope to walk!

Ah but the worldbuilding! That's it, the worldbuilding. There is so much depth to this world. Nothing feels thrown on at the last minute, it's cohesive and it has bones (if that makes sense). You can tell a ton of thought and purpose went into how it was created and the way it’s revealed is interesting without feeling info-dump-ish. I enjoyed every taste of it that I got.

I can say confidently that The Sunbearer Trials is one of my favorite reads of 2023. It is such a solidly great all-around book that I wouldn’t hesitate to recommend it to any reader. I loved it so much that, even though I had a reviewer ebook ARC, I went out and bought a hard copy for myself. I don’t know how to give a stronger endorsement than that!


Note: I received a free electronic edition of this book via NetGalley in exchange for the honest review above. I would like to thank them, the publisher, and the author for the opportunity to do so.

Years ago, Sol sacrificed themselves in order to travel into the sky and shed light onto the lands, in order to keep the villainous Obsidian gods at bay. Every new decade, Sol selects ten of the most worthy semidioses (demigods) to compete in the Sunbearer Trials. The winner carries light and life to all the temples of Reino del Sol, but the loser has the greatest honor - they are sacrificed to Sol, their body melted down to refuel the sun stones for another ten years. Teo, a Jade semidiose (lesser demigod) and Trans son of the goddess of birds, is not worried about being selected for the trials (as it is generally only Gold semidioses that are selected to compete). But, his best friend, Niya, is a Gold and likely to be selected. When the selections for the trials begin, Teo is surprised when both he and another jade are selected, Xio (the thirteen year old child of the god of bad luck).

What a wild and amazing ride this book was. Honestly, incredible world building, amazing character development, and a twist that actually shocks. I am so anxious to read the next book, I need to know the rest of the story. I need to know if my predictions might be true. I need to know how Teo will work to fix what happened, how he will make the Golds see the worth of Jades.

I absolutely loved Teo's connection with his friends. Niya was fabulous and added lightness and humour to an otherwise dark book. These kids are facing death, but she barges head first into it without much thought, just hope and her ego. Aurelio is a Gold hero, but he is also reserved and cautious, he tries to do right by Teo after having rejected their friendship in the past. Xio is so downtrodden, down on his luck, sad; but Teo does all he can to help him and make him feel part of a group.

I also really liked how Teo questioned the world around him and how it worked. The blind obedience, the Golds wielding so much power and control, while the Jades work just to exist and provide for their people. Teo's questioning leads to others questioning the world as well, how unfair it seems to be for some, how maybe they need to look at new ways to approach how things are run. A good look at power imbalance and how oblivious those in power can be about the world around them and the space they take up.

The Golds are so disconnected from their people, they rule by enforcing and from a distance. Whereas the Jades are of the people, they interact with those they live with, they help, they feel like neighbours, friends. They are not cold and aloof, they are approachable and therefore loveable (which helps when people begin turning up for Teo).

I thought the ending would go another way and was completely surprised, but in a good way. Aiden Thomas is just a phenomenal author. Cannot get enough!

This was soooo good!!! I loved how many characters there were - everyone was so unique so it wasn’t hard to differentiate the characters. So much queer and diverse rep. The plot was super interesting but ended in such a big cliffhanger!! I can’t wait to read the next book once it comes out :)

This is well written and has an original setting. I already purchased it for the library! love the cover!

The trials of Hunger Games meets the gods of Percy Jackson meets the mercurial judging of Taskmaster meets the powers of young trained youth of My Hero Academia, with just a touch of LOTR thrown in at the end. This was really really fun. I feel like this has a very broad potential readership. It’s adventure, it’s unlikely hero, it’s gay as hell, it’s super Latine-empowering, it’s subtle Spanish language learning, it’s heart pounding, and beyond all that, it’s Aiden Thomas writing continuing to shine through in the rare successful sophomore book. Absolutely excellent and fun and I can’t wait for the other half.

By now, we've all heard the pitch that The Sunbearer Trials is Mexican Percy Jackson meets The Hunger Games, but I promise you: it is so much more than that.

The Sunbearer Trials is an unforgettable introduction to a vibrant fantasy world that has everything you could possibly want: a large and diverse cast of characters, an epic series of trials, rich world-building, and great messages about the transformative power of community.

To start with the characters, If you’ve read Cemetery Boys you know that Aiden is very adept at crafting side characters who threaten to steal the spotlight, and they have really outdone themself in this one, especially because this is the kind of story that necessitates a very large cast. It’s not easy to juggle a bunch of different characters, to make them all feel personable and distinctive, to make sure that no one gets lost in the shuffle—but this book is able to beautifully balance all of those things.

Having such a big cast of characters also just makes things super fun and interesting. It allows a lot more opportunity for conflict and character growth, especially because all these characters have such different personalities and journeys to undertake. Having all these different characters also introduces an element of mysteriousness, because you can never guess what they’re going to do next, you don’t know how they’re strategizing behind the scenes, you never know how they’re going to approach each new challenge. And that’s exciting because it means there’s as many ways of conquering these trials as there are characters.

At the end of the day, these characters really are just kids. They’ve been conscripted into these circumstances where they have to compete against each other, and they've been forced to become something they might not have otherwise become—which is to say vicious competitors. Even though they’re expected to perform within those very specific constraints, they’re still they’re own people, and I feel like this story really respects that.

On a related note, if you really tried to force my hand and get me to describe the experience of reading The Sunbearer Trials in one concise phrase, I would tell you that this book is a feast for the senses. There’s so much rich information to take in about this world on literally every single page. The fantasy world is so lovingly steeped in Mexican culture and history that it’s impossible to miss that sense of warmth and depth that comes with that attention to detail. It's very much center stage at every turn.

One of the really exciting aspects of the trials is that each challenge takes place in a different host city across Reina del Sol. So the characters are touring through all these different cities as the story progresses. What's especially great is that even though the characters are united under the umbrella of their sun god and their various deities, each city very much has its own culture, its own history, its own distinctive architecture, food, belief system, and system of values. In other words, they are not monolithic. So the reader is constantly able to access all these different ideas, visuals, and landscapes that very much engage all of the senses, and give each part of this story a distinctive and grounded sense of place.

The experience of this world is fully immersive. It’s so clearly inspired by Mexican culture and draws from that, but it very much stands on its own and all the really cool details piece together something that’s new and exciting to read about. There are so many layers to excavate in this world, giving the story an element of discovery, and I think that’s something that really makes the book stand out.

I’m not revealing anything here, but I also appreciate how much thought has been put into how the trials themselves work. To go back to that comparison of The Hunger Games, I think there’s actually a huge difference between that story and this one, which is that competitors are actively killed off throughout The Hunger Games, which creates very different stakes.

Some people might argue that The Hunger Games are more intense because of that, because the possibility of death is constantly looming over the characters, which obviously presents a sense of finality and mortality. The Sunbearer Trials takes a very different approach in that the trial rankings are cumulative rather than solidified on a round-to-round basis, which I think actually makes it much more exciting and interesting, because nothing is ever set in stone.

While it would be "shocking" to see characters constantly being killed, I think this way of doing the trials actually makes for much more compelling stakes, because everyone is constantly 100% in the game throughout the entire process. If characters are dying as the story goes on, the pool of competitors would get smaller and smaller, and the possible outcomes would also significantly diminish with each character loss.

What’s most notable is that the story doesn’t lose *anything* by taking this different approach.

The threat of being sacrificed is still looming over all the characters throughout the trials, there’s still a sense of desperation as different characters take their turns at both the top and bottom of the ranks, but it’s almost more exciting and unpredictable because you can never truly count out any of the characters.

Something else that makes this story stand out compared to other series that involve life-and-death trials is that many of those other stories depend on outright brutality to establish high stakes, and this story is able to establish its own high stakes without having to solely rely on violence. That’s not to say that the characters don’t fight, get physical, or endanger each other with their magic powers—because they definitely do—but the trials themselves, by nature, are much more complex.

The trials are not all about power and brute strength. The characters can’t physically fight their way into the top ranks, no matter how hard they try. The trials themselves are designed to test other things like creative thinking, problem solving, decision making, sometimes teamwork—all of which are not only encouraged but lead to unique consequences. Again, because there are so many moving pieces and so many different and valid ways to approach each challenge, that not only validates all the characters' different strengths and perspectives, but it keeps you constantly guessing about what’s going to happen next.

But enough about the mechanics of the world. All of that would be fascinating and notable in and of itself, but the success of all those elements hinges on having a great main character, and The Sunbearer Trials has an incredible hero in Teo, our protagonist.

Teo is a chaotic little troublemaker. He does not like following the rules. And, honestly, why would he? He's spent his entire life being subjected to this weirdly stratified system of semidioses where his worth and his future have been pre-determined by his power or perceived lack thereof. He lives in a society where it’s considered an "honor" for kids to die for the benefit of everyone else. All things considered, the rules and the way things work objectively sucks, and in so many ways he is an unwillingly participant in this whole system. He doesn’t want to uphold it, but he also feels powerless to stop it.

His knack for challenging authority is something he takes with him into the trials. Teo is constantly testing the boundaries of what is allowed or expected. On principle (and most likely out of spite), he never takes the straightforward, easy path in any of the trials.

At the end of the day, this story understands that people who are willing to start some trouble, ask some questions, defy some boundaries, or dare to exist and think in ways that are not often embraced or accepted are the ones who can affect true and meaningful change. There will always be danger in following or investing in any kind of system without question, especially the kinds that actively harm or attempt to isolate the most vulnerable among us, and Teo is definitely not afraid to start poking all kinds of holes in the status quo, even if it means defying the gods.

To go back to the point of challenging this deeply-ingrained system, The Sunbearer Trials, much like any other kind of fictional death match, function in a way that motivates the competitors to fight their way towards the top, if only so that they don’t become the sacrifice. Not being killed is a great motivator, but on a broader scale, this is a system that expects its participants to prioritize their own ranking, their own well-being, their own honor, their own life over nine other people, and depending on how they conduct themselves, they could be rewarded for that choice.

I think that gaming structure really speaks to the cultural perspective that’s especially prevalent in Western society, most notoriously here in the United States, where the focus is on individualism and exceptionalism over everyone and everything else. People are conditioned to prize their own worth, status, safety, success, happiness, over everyone else’s, the thought process being that as long as you take care of yourself, nothing else matters.

That’s exactly the kind of mindset that’s encouraged in The Sunbearer Trials, because at the very least these semidioses should actively be trying to avoid death. But, in reality, it’s a lose-lose system. If you’re the worst-ranked competitor, you die. But if you’re the top-ranked competitor, you’re bestowed with this "divine honor," but you also have to do the actual sacrificing.

So the question becomes: how can Teo work around this conundrum even though he has no choice but to contribute to it?

The solution is that he doesn’t give importance to his own rank. He doesn’t want to be last place for obvious reasons, but he’s not actively trying to secure a higher place either. He’s more interested in helping the people he cares about and creating alliances so that none of them get left behind, which is inherently a collectivist mindset. And what's interesting is that some of those alliances are consistent, and some are situational. So it’s not like Teo is only reserving his help for a set number of people, but rather he’s judging whether he and the other competitors can help each other on a case-by-case basis.

I think that sends a really strong message about how the most disruptive and powerful thing we can do is care about other people and take care of the people around us. Though we might be trapped within these destructive, harmful, cyclical systems, we can still beat them by finding support in community, which is a transformative, lasting kind of love and support. Community is what endures, and stories like this remind us that our goal should not just be to *survive* these oppressive systems but to help as many people who are in our power to help. That is how we move the needle, that is how we restore hope, that is how we make a difference.

I think what's kind of astounding is that everything I've discussed here is *barely* scratching the surface of what The Sunbearer Trials has to offer. There's such an incredible element of discovery that is built into the story, and I think the fact that even this deep-dive review can't possibly begin to explore all those details and plot points is really a testament to the world Aiden Thomas has begun building in this duology. Simply put: The Sunbearer Trials is an incredibly exciting, fresh new fantasy story that you absolutely do not want to miss.

I absolutely loved the world building in this book. I felt like I was floating down the rivers looking at the beautiful indigenous communities of Mexico. Aiden Thomas has a way with words and names that just make reading fun. I wish some of the trials were a little more challenging, but the later ones demonstrated their creativity. The gods and backstories were detailed and complex. The plot twist happened way too late but I know it’s a planned duology, so knew it was coming. Chisme and Verdad are my favorite characters because their names are perfect and the represent the world of gossip amidst a world who wants news. Can’t wait for the next book.

If you’re looking for a Percy Jackson & Hunger Games cross but make it queer THIS IS IT!!!!

I absolutely flew through this book and fell in love with the characters!! The premise was so fun and I was hooked from the very first trial.. The ending of the book was WOW and I can’t waiiiiiit for the next book in the series 🫶🏼🫶🏼

One of the best YA fantasy books I've read in awhile! While it's a queer reworking of the Hunger-Games-style dystopias we've seen in the past, that's not all this is, and the story feels very fresh. There's a lot of fun to be had exploring the world-building Thomas has set up, and the "trials" themselves are actually interesting (another heavily-marketed YA fantasy I read recently did not have this part going for it.) Thomas does a great job writing endearing characters with humor and heart.
The ending sets us up for a sequel really well and I'm already excited to read the next book!
I received an ebook ARC from NetGalley for review purposes.

Yeah, I’m beginning to think Aiden Thomas just isn’t for me. The characters are so immature, and the story just isn’t great. Seems to be a theme across their books.

I can't believe I managed to forget to write a review of The Sunbearer Trials! I love all of Aiden Thomas' books and this was no exception. Readers will be drawn into the competition, as well as root for Teo, Niya, and the friends they make along the way. I loved the world building and character development, but if I am being honest, I am still distraught over the ending! Cannot wait for book 2!