Member Reviews
Kate, thank you for giving a wonderful, heartwarming introduction about what happens behind the scenes when someone dies. I liked how you wrote about how you and your colleagues cared for the deceased. You showed warmth, sadness, humour and your own vulnerability within your story. I loved the respect and the support you showed family members. Moving onto the effects covid had on the relatives and their loved ones. Linda did so well bringing your memories to life. It made me feel emotional and I understood more about the impact on the staff who had to deal with the sadness of relatives and the loneliness of the person dying without someone they knew beside them.
This was the best book I have read in both the memoirs and the medical genres - I really will never forget this incredible story. Thank you both
It's odd that the leading feeling I would have from reading a book about life in a Northern mortuary would be 'reassurance', but that was exactly it. Kate Marshall guides the reader through her first year working in the mortuary, and explores the cases of those who pass through it. Compelling and enjoyably written with Linda Watson-Brown, the key takeaway here is how much respect the deceased are treated with - carefully looked after and cared for with respect and dignity. Eye opening and surprisingly uplifting
Sorry for your loss follows the career of Kate, who is working in a mortuary in the U.K. This book provides details not are not typically revealed to the families of loved ones who have passed. It was reassuring to see how the individuals who have died, and their families are treated with respect and love. There are vignettes presented in the story about particular individuals and their fates, including the reactions of family members. We meet Mary who has wanted a child for so long, and she loses her baby during pregnancy. She can't bear to hold her deceased baby, but comes daily to read to the child. This book attempted to demystify what occurs in a mortuary after someone has died. It was an interesting read. Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for the advance review copy in exchange for my honest review.
*Thank you to NetGalley, Kate Marshall, Linda Watson-Brown and the publisher for providing me with an ARC in exchange for an honest review.*
I think this book is essential in addressing the reality of death and grieving from someone who works in a hospital mortuary. Although it was hard to read at times, it taught me a lot. It also made me address how hard-working, respectful and caring the staff can be when dealing with people after they pass away. There's the stereotype that people working jobs like that are numb and heartless, and I think reading this will reassure people who have lost loved ones. It is truthful, raw and emotional, so I recommend being in the right headspace for it, but I personally loved it
This was quite a quick read for me as I was sacked in immediately. As someone who worked in care for many years I appreciate when authors explore the taboo topic of death in a way that lifts the veil to the reader. This author handled the topic with respect and the chapters about their struggles through covid were heart wrenching. Not a book for those with a weak stomach as it does get quite graphic but definitely worth a read!
This was an informative and thoughtful book about a world most of us don't know about, and don't want to know about. At times it did feel repetitive, but I enjoyed hearing the Personal accounts.
Sorry For Your Loss is an unusual memoir, it tells the story of Kate Marshall’s first year working in an NHS mortuary. I’m sure there are many people who would wonder why anyone would write such a book, and even more so, why others would want to read it. As soon as I read the synopsis, I knew I wanted to read it, I was intrigued.
It is really heartening to read the love and care that Kate, and her fellow mortuary colleagues take with their precious charges, our loved ones.
Unfortunately, I found there to be exceptions. Referring to a bariatric patient as “huge” doesn’t feel dignified, I personally feel that isn’t being respectful to that patient. If the author has written this, I believe somebody in the editing process could have advised removing such a judgemental, unkind description. I also noted the only time a patient’s specific weight was mentioned, was in bariatric patients.
There are many touching stories, and sadly some incredibly tough situations, when death further divides a family. The book is highly emotive, it brought tears to my eyes in many places. The pages talking of Mothers grieving for their babies, I found the most emotional. A life taken away far too soon, or not even having had the chance to start, must be the hardest to bear.
This diary written book will help to take away the mystery and concern, of what happens to our loved ones when they die. The lesson from the book is to live your life, not worry about death, and love those you hold dear with all your heart. 4 ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Kate Marshall worked in a mortuary which is attached to an NHS hospital in the UK.
She writes about the procedures after death and how the deceased are prepared for viewing by relatives. Her goal is to bring the taboo subject of death more into our awareness and normalize it. At the same time, she lets us appreciate life. The book left me with many thoughts and reflections.
It is simply written thus giving it directness or immediacy to the subject.
Thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for the opportunity to read and review this book. An honest and open account of the author's experience of working in a mortuary. Having recently lost my mother this gave me some peace to kno that staff working n thisnprofession care and respect the dead. A moving book.
grief, grieving, nonfiction, England, memoir, memories, mental-health-issues*****
As a retired RN in the states, there are things that I needed to translate into practices where I live, but some things are the same because whether working in a care home or hospital, or even in the medical examiner's office, it's basically the same. Back in the days when I first became a nurse we had the same clientele and did the autopsies at the main government hospital, this is no longer true where I live. I was glad to see that there are such caring people to help the grieving and commiserated with all of the necessary negative changes in the systems as dictated by the invasion of Covid-19.
I'm not sure how the general public will react to the hard truths of life and death in a city, but those of us who have dealt with the dying and their families (or lack thereof) will hardly be shocked, but will empathize with the author and her co-workers in this (basically) thankless work. I was riveted to the end.
I requested and received a free e-book copy from Ad Lib Publishers, Mardle Books via NetGalley. Thank you
This ARC was provided to me via Kindle, Ad LiB Publishers and by #NetGalley. Opinions expressed are completely my own.
A real look at an emotional profession. A touching, deep, respectful read.
Overall Rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars
The stories woven into "Sorry for Your Loss" are tragic, yet beautiful. I think I would have rated this higher had I read it at a different time in my life. Experiencing loss and dealing with grief = the most difficult circumstance in the human experience. Kate Marshall does a great job describing her work, but she also takes care in how she presents each life story, each human she encounters... right from the beginning in her work as a cleaning specialist. Pick this up if you're in the healthcare industry, a therapist, or even someone simply interested in working closely with humans experiencing loss.
Watson-Brown shared her experiences of working in a mortuary and readers are given the opportunity to read true stories of specific cases. She also outlines the emotional impact for herself and fellow mortuary employees. I’ve experienced a great loss recently, and this gave me some comfort in knowing that mortuary workers try their best to give our loved ones dignity and respect. 5 stars. Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.
2.5 stars
The topic of this book is so interesting and it's great that death and dying is being discussed openly. It is evident that the author does care a great deal about her job and the care she provides to people but unfortunately I found the narrative to be a bit repetitive and sometimes a bit judgemental in its tone.
I think this has the potential to be better if it was edited in a more organised format and certain comments were removed. Not a bad read but not a great one either.
With thanks to Mardle Books/Netgalley for the ARC
Thanks to NetGalley for the opportunity to read this book.
As the author says we are far to reluctant to discuss the great adventure that will happen to us all eventually.
A warts and all honest account of life in a mortuary. Not stomach churning ....it is informative and tells the reader the day to day business of another branch of medical/NHS staff which is hidden away from society.
While the subject was interesting and Kate Marshall certainly shares each story with care -- it's clear she cares not only for those who have died but for their families as well -- the book is poorly written. It's always respectful, but reads like blog posts strung together, relying solely on the month by month 'structure' to move the story along.
DNF @ 45%
The part that I read I found to be really interesting - I liked all the different stories mentioned. However, I just couldn't get past the chaotic narrative and the constant repetition of cases. I think this book needs to be edited, possibly having each chapter themed rather than randomised.
Thank you to the publisher for the opportunity to read this book.
A memoir that follows Kate Marshall working in a UK mortuary.
I have always loved non-fiction, particularly around medicine and healthcare and anything to do with end of life. I was imagining this to be similar to Smoke Gets in Your Eyes however I felt disappointed in it.
Kate's compassion and kindness is clearly portrayed throughout and the care that she puts into each individual that she cares for. I especially love how the memoir ended with COVID 19 deaths as it gave a personal perspective in how mortuaries and their staff were so heavily affected.
With some editing I feel this book could really well - however at the moment, it feels very anecdotal and repetitive, with Kate repeating herself frequently (we cover faith deaths, families asking about the fridges, etc. in many chapters throughout). The book is organised in chronological order however I feel it would have been better to perhaps pair it up by topic or theme as styled in other memoirs.
At times I also felt that there was some judgement expressed towards some of the families that didn't really feel necessary - for example, stating that children were "twisting the knife" and being "petty" in the way they spoke about their father and the woman he had cheated on his wife with.
Thank you NetGalley for sending me this ARC. I have written this review voluntarily. All views are my own.
Thank you Netgalley for the advance reader copy of Sorry for Your Loss by Kate Marshall and Linda Watson-Brown in exchange for an honest review. When I was in college I interned at the Stanislaus County Coroner's Office and learned a lot. It was an amazing experience and I got my degree in Criminal Justice. When I saw this ARC available, I thought it would be very interesting as it was like my experience, but totally different. It's in a different country with different way things are done. It was intriguing to read about how she got there and how well it fit her life.
💗“All of these experiences were giving me some clarity. I was starting to see that some of the things we get hung up on just don’t matter. I was seeing patterns within the grief. How love presented itself in death, how families reacted to losing someone, how the way we are in life writes the final chapter. One thing which came up frequently was people saying that they had only “popped out for a minute” or “just gone to the loo” after days of watching their mum or dad or partner towards the end, and yet that was when they had passed. I started to wonder if there is actually some way in which people can die when they want to, whether there is a small part of control at the very end. Families can watch for days, leave the room or the bedside for seconds, and it happens. Maybe it’s the last act of love – sparing someone you love the agony of seeing you take a final breath.”
I thought this was an amazing book, written from a very kind and loving perspective. I actually finished it several weeks ago and was so overcome by the stories and the author’s observations that I needed to think about my review.
Kate Marshall took a subject we are rarely comfortable discussing or questioning—death—and removed some of the mystery by openly sharing her reality of life in a hospital mortuary. I was impressed by the level of respect and compassion shown for the bodies they cared for, and for the families they helped through the process.
Each time I read through my highlighted passages, I think, “Yes—that’s exactly right.” Maybe because my own mother’s death is still fresh, and Kate put many of my emotions into words. Here are some that I found especially meaningful.
💗“It’s all these little things that people dwell on and want to erase or rewrite. They beat themselves up about them. But, actually, do you know what? It’s often clear the departed were very much loved and they had normal relationships in normal lives. Those who are left behind, though, often want every single, enduring memory to be a positive one. Unfortunately, life isn’t like that. There are some families who do it better than others…”
💗“This is why I think we need to talk more openly about death – not just the practical side of things, what we’ll wear and who will get your earrings – but the emotional side, too. That sounds like a heavy conversation to have but that’s only because we put death in a pushed-away, little box of things that are distasteful to discuss. We don’t want to upset anyone about it, we don’t even want to raise it.”
💗”People whose partners, spouses or parents are no longer with us are expected, too often, to have a time limit on their grief and then the person will never be mentioned again. The only way to get through grief is to get through it, if that makes sense. The only way to deal with your new normal is to talk about them. You go through the pain barrier that way. It’s awful and it’s hard, but never having a conversation again about who you’ve lost is not the way to pay tribute to them.”
💗”I’ve lived among the dead for longer than I would have thought, and they have taught me more than I could ever have imagined. If I could reach out and thank each and every one of them for adding to the tapestry that has brought me to this place of understanding, I would. We’ll all go through this and all that I know is that love will be what matters when it’s your time. Don’t be afraid to show affection, don’t be afraid to stop working and listen to old stories, don’t be afraid of what lies behind the curtain.”
Thank you to the publishers at NetGalley for the advanced reader copy for review.