Untangling Your Marriage says that there are 4 ways to get divorced:

1. DIY
2. Mediation, with or without lawyers
3. Go to court, with or without lawyers
4. Collaborate on divorce

This book focuses on the last option.

There are specially trained collaborative divorce lawyers who craft an uncontested divorce for you.

Each spouse hires a collaborative divorce lawyer & the four of you work together to hammer out an agreement in the least adversarial and most constructive way.

Mediation should be cheaper than this method because you only have to hire one person, not two.

They also talk about "financial neutrals," "Neutral mental health coaches," and "child specialists."

Now you have a team of five!
Expensive!
Still, it is probably cheaper than a legal battle; it's psychologically less damaging.

The book's weakness is that it assumes that you have children. It says, "You'll want to stay cordial for the sake of the children."

If you want to mediate your divorce, she says to get a lawyer who specializes in collaborative divorce and is a member of the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals (IACP).

Positions and interests are different.

POSITIONS: I want alimony. I want sole custody. I was the house.

INTERESTS: I need financial security. I want to live in a safe place. I want to see my children frequently and be involved in important decisions.

CONCLUSION: A surprising amount of the book is less about legal stuff and more about psychology, communication, self-reflection, and forgiveness.