I'm kind of obsessed with this. If I could have, I think I might have read this in one sitting. I loved this cast of characters so much, and oh Kyr's arc. Fantastic. I definitely intend to read more from Emily Tesh in the future.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for this ARC.
This was an intense ride, and SO GOOD. It was fascinating to be dropped into the world of this small group of people, who you and the narrator at first believe to be all the good left in the universe, only to slowly discover that maybe things are not as they seem, and then watch the effect of this discovery on our protagonist. I loved some of the twisty parts, and I loved how queer it is, and I basically just loved it. This is very hard to put down, and I got very involved.

Wow. Yes I requested this arc but no, I did not expect to love it so much. The pacing was phenomenal. The character development, incredible. THE STORY, absolutely amazing. This book cured my reading slump. I advise you to go in blind but check trigger warnings if you need to. In the arc content warnings we’re at the front of the books, I hope they’re in the published copy.

One of my new favorite reads, I hope everyone checks this out.

This was an absolutely excellent space opera. I am floored that this is a debut book. The fact that this book was so well rounded and concise only made the testing experience even better.

This book has it all. Time travel. Multiple dimensions. Alternate realities. Found family and real family. Second chances for humanity. I could not stop reading. A totally bingeable book from start to finish.

Thank you to @netgalley and @torbooks for the chance to read and review Some Desperate Glory early!

This book comes out April 11, 2023 and, as much as I am not a sci-fi reader, I had to check it out!

My synopsis and review:

Valkyr and her brother Magnus live on Gaea station, along with the last breaths of the human resistance. Humans have lost the war against the Majoda alien alliance, who are armed with their all powerful, all knowing "Wisdom".

Valkyr is a Warbreed, genetically engineered to be the best fighter humankind has to offer. She has worked her entire life to be the best, to make her mess the best group there is.

But that all comes to a screeching halt when their assignments come in: Kyr is relegated to Nursery. She is condemned to be bred and bear Gaea Station sons for the rebellion until she dies trying. Her brother Magnus? He's sent on a suicide mission.

Kyr can't live this way, and she does the one thing no one sees coming: she becomes a traitor to the cause. Teaming up with her brother's outsider techy friend, and a captive alien, she takes flight on a dangerous mission to rescue her brother and prove her worth.

The further she gets from Gaea Station, the more complicated things become. Emotionally and logistically.

When everything you know gets turned on its head, flipped inside out, and you know no longer what is reality.. who can you trust?

Will you die for the cause you were raised to believe in, or will you be brave enough to live for something more?

🌞🌞🌞🌞

So, this book. Wow. It went so many directions (literally) 😂 I loved it so much! Read it, read it, read it! A queer space opera. Do I need to say more?

The evolution of Kyr was enough to keep me hooked. She was stunning, beautiful, and hard to look at. Powerful, brave and raw.

Magnus 😭😭 oh Mags. How my heart hurt for him through this entire book, through every journey. He is too wonderful.

Just. *Sigh* it's too much.

My only qualm was the ending, like.. it needed an epilogue?

Fantastic worldbuilding, and the best kind of sci-fi that holds a mirror to our world and makes the reader question their idea of a 'perfect' society. The first act slows down before getting to the twist, but the following action more than makes up for it.

I haven't read any of the author's previous books, but I will definitely want to look into them after this! I really enjoyed this novel. Kyr was an excellent character, and it was very rewarding to watch her grow and learn. Tesh seems to be very good at writing complicated characters, as both Avi and Kyr are difficult and prickly.

I do wish this book was a bit heavier on the science part of science fiction. I would've really liked to know more about shadow jumping and how the Wisdom worked. I think this book would've been more successful as a YA instead of an adult book. Right now it reads more YA, especially with how the narrative engages only on a surface level with the heavy topics of indoctrination, racism, and reproductive autonomy. I expect a bit more thought and nuance from adult novels.

Good enough in the last third to distract me from dwelling on my cat who just died.

Kyr is unbearable for the first half of the book: she’s young, is an overachiever, believes she knows best, and has grown up brainwashed by the xenophobic homophobic, misogynistic breakaway capsule society she grew up in. She’s begins having experiences which force her to reconsider her beliefs, but is able to mostly subsume these beneath the principles of her upbringing.

Then, around the 50% mark, parallel universes and multiple timelines get woven in. Kyr finally becomes human instead of a brainwashed soldier, her crew rally around her, and the ending of this standalone sci-fi novel is very satisfying.

This was a wild, enjoyable, and (for this I am so grateful) distracting ride.

Thank you to Macmillain-Tor/Force and NetGalley for providing an eARC to review!

For me this was The First Sister meets Skyward - I'm not sure that I'd describe it as a queer space opera but it was definitely an incredible addition to the sci-fi genre!

I don't know that I've ever really read from the perspective of a character like Kyr before, who is basically fully indoctrinated into an extremist cult, and I really liked her development arc over the course of the book. At first she's abrasive and solely focused on being the best soldier she can be for a dead Earth, but then you see her slowly come into her humanity and realising that maybe the life she always idolised is actually pretty messed up. It was cool to see the echoes of her other selves as well, and the lives she could have had.

The parallel universe stuff wasn't confusing either which I really appreciated - I think this was somewhat mediated by coming through Kyr who wouldn't quite have a grasp on the really technical elements. We love accessible sci-fi! The side characters were complex and interesting too, and it was just such a well crafted story that I feel I immediately need to re-read. The only thing I didn't love was the VERY end, but overall I was here for the ride.

I was kind of worried because space/sci-fi stuff like that is usually not my type of thing, but this was totally great. The characters were brilliant and I loved the writing. Fans of speculative fiction need to read this one! I'll come back to this author's works very soon.

HIGHLIGHTS
~Kyr that is NOT how friendship works
~or mentoring
~listen to the alien sweetie
~two things will survive the apocalypse: cockroaches, and That Fucking Guy
~humans are the monsters of the universe

When I first read Tor’s sneak peek of Some Desperate Glory, I decided that this book wasn’t for me. The opening chapters introduce us to the kind of ick dystopia designed to make me rage, and it’s been a while since I enjoyed reading that kind of thing.

So I put it down and walked away.

…The thing is, I couldn’t stop thinking about it.

Some Desperate Glory opens with Kyr – the best soldier in her cohort – waiting for the assignment that will determine her future. In Gaea, a tiny space station, you don’t pick your own career; it’s chosen for you, and if you’re a girl, there are plenty of reasons to worry about what your assignment might be. Women are assigned to combat (the most-honoured sector) less often than men, and they’re the only ones ever assigned to Nursery, where your job is to be sexually available (to men) and constantly pregnant. Women never make it to command roles, it’s illegal to be queer, and the entire community only exists as a sort of terrorist commune, out for revenge on the aliens who destroyed Earth a generation earlier.

Can you see why I didn’t want to keep reading? It’s not that any of this is poorly written, but it felt like a dystopia designed to make me angry, and I just didn’t want to deal with it.

But I couldn’t stop thinking about it, because the worldbuilding – the structure of Gaea – makes no sense. It niggled at me. The story Command is telling – that people like Kyr are brainwashed with – doesn’t match up to the reality of life on their middle-of-nowhere space station. For example, a huge amount of the combat training is built around hand-to-hand fighting. But this is a sci-fi setting way off in our future – ‘battle’ means space ships firing at each other, not wrestling. Which means your hand-to-hand skills are completely irrelevant. The training simulators ought to be about piloting and running a warship, and space tactics – but they aren’t. In fact, no one learns anything about ships until they are assigned to Combat. Physical strength shouldn’t mean much in a setting like this, but instead it’s held up as one of, if not the most important quality a soldier can have. We outright see a tactical genius being mocked and dismissed, instead of recognised for his ability, because he’s a nerd rather than a jock – even though his skills are the ones that really ought to be priceless in this set-up.

What the hell is going on?

For that matter, why this whole thing of women being lesser? The justification for that is, again, that women aren’t (generally) as physically strong as men, but that shouldn’t matter here. There’s no reason Combat and leadership roles shouldn’t be split about 50/50 in this setting – and they aren’t. And if Nursery is about making sure humans don’t die out, with each pregnancy supposedly a carefully decided match of bloodlines – then why are visits to Nursery used as a motivating reward for male soldiers? Why even have sex, rather than the much less complicated method of insemination?

Why are creepy old men putting the prettiest teenagers in Nursery and then pretending they don’t know about the assignment that they signed off on?

And the thing is, none of this reads as though Tesh has messed up and made a mistake. The worldbuilding doesn’t make sense, but it feels deliberate. Tesh knows it makes no sense. It’s all on purpose, and we’re meant to, if not break it down and write pages and pages of analysis like I did, at least be left uneasy at the dissonance we can’t help but pick up on.

Basically, I needed answers. That’s what made me push through this horrible, gross cult Kyr has been raised in. Was the Earth even destroyed at all? If it was, was it actually the aliens, or was it some terrible last-stand type call made by humans? Even if it was the aliens, was it on purpose? Gaea Station is so incredibly fucked-up, the dissonance between the story Kyr was raised on and the reality around her so intense, that Tesh had me questioning everything. I can’t remember the last time a book had me this suspicious, this braced for a gotcha! moment that would upend all that had gone before.

CONSIDER ME IMPRESSED.

This is really only the smallest part of Some Desperate Glory, though; Kyr’s time on Gaea Station is the shortest part of the book. But I’m hoping that showing you how obsessed I got – with just this small part of the story! – gives you some idea of how much this book just GRABS you. Some Desperate Glory is not just a book that you can’t put down; it’s also one you can’t stop thinking about, both while you’re reading and after you’ve finished it. Honestly, my biggest frustration with it was that I was reading it early – so I didn’t have anyone to talk to about it! Because this is very much a novel that you want all your friends to have read so you can debate it and analyse it and shriek over it in a group, at two in the morning, when you’re all just manic and wired and flaily enough to tackle the issues this book raises head-on.

Because there’s a lot of them. I’m not going to talk about the plot, because you really should get to enjoy every twist and turn for yourself without spoilers, but Some Desperate Glory goes hard. It’s a book that asks incredibly difficult questions without trying to offer easy answers – honestly, most of the questions are left open, for us to try and figure out on our own, which personally I think is the best approach to issues this emotional and complicated. Fundamental to Kyr’s entire existence are questions like–

When are you supposed to let go of terrible things that have been done to you? Ever? Never?

What’s the difference between justice and revenge?

Do the means justify the ends? The greatest good for the greatest number?

Is it ever time to stop fighting?

If it is, when?

If it is, how?

Tesh has, unquestionably, written a masterpiece here. And I’m still completely stunned that this is a standalone – that Tesh manages to pack so much story into a single book, and for that book to then blaze with a glory that is not desperate in the least, but that is deep and fervent and brighter than a sun. Most authors would need a trilogy to tell the same story with half as much impact, passion, and depth, and Tesh has done it without ever making the story feel rushed or cramped, distilling the story she wanted to tell to its most potent possible form.

Holy cow. This was unexpected. I am shocked at the amount of emotion that this book pulled from me.

The main character, Kyr, is a stickler for the rules. In a bad way. The lack of outward emotion had me confounded and in extreme dislike of her. She was head of her mess in a military setting. Always arguing with her rival, Cleo, but remaining her unit's leader always.

She is fighting to avenge earth, a distant home planet that was destroyed by the Wisdom. When she finally gets her appointment to a particular long-term job... she is speechless. But, on learning of her brothers disappearance, this sets off a tide.. a tsunami... of events that change absolutely everything.

I had no idea how attached to this character I would become. No idea the depths of this story. This is a masterpiece and led me to thinking of all sorts of issues relatable. Great read!

Out April 11, 2023!

What an absolute Pandora’s Box of despair today’s book is. Some Desperate Glory, by Emily Tesh, is a stand-alone science fiction thriller about a cell of radical Earth terrorists looking to avenge the death of the blue marble by taking out some alien civilians. It is a strange and brilliant reversal of many classic first-contact tropes with a deep dive into how propaganda can warp your perception of reality and how war often has no good outcomes no matter how perfectly you roll the dice. And to top it all off, all of this is explored in a tight standalone novel that will easily crack our top books of 2023. Let's dive in.

Content Warning: This book deals with extremely heavy subjects and has some upsetting depictions of genocide, suicide, and sexual abuse. Please know that going in.

Kyr, short for Valkyr, is an elite Terran operative who has lived her entire life on the remote space station Gaea. She has trained every day of her life for the moment she can avenge the murder of planet Earth. They are all that is left of humanity after the Majoda alien confederation grouped together in a last-ditch effort in the war and destroyed Earth. She spends each day readying herself to face the Wisdom, the all-powerful, reality-shaping weapon that gave the Majoda their victory over humanity. Kyr has given up all possessions, all interests, and all dreams to train her body into a killing machine to avenge her world. The one allowance she gives herself is a deep love of her one remaining family member, her brother. So when Gaea Command assigns him to certain death and relegates her to the nursery to bear sons until she dies trying (instead of going down killing), she knows she must take humanity’s revenge into her own hands. Thus Kyr journeys out into the larger world to find her brother and begins a painful journey of self-discovery that will rip her apart.

Some Desperate Glory has the sheen and aesthetics of a YA story. A special girl protagonist who is different, a dystopian world that only she can save, and a million big themes that can have their surfaces barely scratched. Despite this, Glory is absolutely not YA. Kyr is a rich and deep character who feels focused and traumatized by her surroundings to the point where she couldn’t develop much personality beyond survival. The worldbuilding feels shallow at first, but that is an effect of the isolated space station, and once Kyr gets out both the protagonist and the reader get to see the world is bigger than you could ever know. The themes are myriad and we don’t spend a ton of time on any, but that feels more because Tesh is very efficient in exploring all the kaleidoscopic horrors that Kyr’s upbringing has spawned.

I would categorize the central themes of the book into two buckets. Social–sexism, racism, and homophobia. And General–the effects of war, history through the lens of the aggressor, coping with tragedy, finding purpose, the greater good, and more. Before I started my own review I took a look through a number of others because I was curious. I found that some people had difficulty with how Tesh handled the social issues specifically. I had no problems with the social issues and found some of them very unique and refreshing. One example is that Kyr is gay and the story features multiple potential timelines. In each of these timelines, Kyr is defined by her sexual orientation at varying degrees depending on the circumstance. Is it a time of peace where relationships are easy? Then romance takes a stronger focus and desires are clearer. Is it a time of war where romance is a distant priority? That part of her gets suppressed, among other emotions, to deal with the life-threatening situations in front of Kyr. But, FYI, I am a cishet white man so I am absolutely not the right authority on these themes.

As for the general themes, Tesh did a fabulous job. Probably my favorite element of this book is the reversal of the first contact trope. In this book, humanity is the aggressive technologically dominant species that discover others and starts taking over worlds in the name of capitalism. The aliens band together for one last stand to heroically destroy the evil human’s homeworld–and it works! Now the universe can be saved from the Terran menace. Showing the other side of the equation in this classic trope really drives home the themes around the horrors of war and that there are no good outcomes.

I really like Kyr as a protagonist and I think her development through the story feels natural and makes me feel hopeful about deprogramming some of the people I know in real life who have fallen for propaganda. Her internal struggles/needs, the things that get in the cracks and open her up to new ideas, and her eventual self-reflection and growth are all super satisfying. All of this is helped by Tesh having strong prose and fast pacing that keeps the reader jumping from question to question. The book is easy to read while being deeply traumatizing at points which is a fun combination.

Some Desperate Glory is one of the most unique, thoughtful, and exciting books I have read this year so far and I wholeheartedly recommend it. It is a messy story that gives new insights into how war and capitalism are evil with a robust cast of interesting characters who all go on fabulous journeys of self-reflection. And, all of this is contained in a single standalone novel. Go read this beautiful and traumatizing story now.

Rating: Some Desperate Glory - 9.5/10
-Andrew

Emily Tesh set herself a difficult task in Some Desperate Glory. Present the reader with a young protagonist raised in a militaristic society who is all about duty, war-breeding, xenophobia, homophobia and worse, then draw her through enough world-shattering experiences to make her interesting, flaws and all, from start to finish. And Tesh hits the mark. I found the novel to be one of the most interesting character studies in recent science fiction.

Some Desperate Glory is also an exciting adventure about the last remnants of human society after the destruction of Earth, with world-splitting events shaking the characters to the core and keeping the interest high right to the last page. Sure, some of the action depends on black-box doings with the aid of a sentient AI called the Wisdom that can manipulate shadowspace, whatever that is, and all reality, but that’s not unusual in a space opera. What is unusual are the many transformations the young hero, Valkyr, undergoes that shatter her beliefs and leave her to reach for the deepest core of her sense of right and wrong in order to survive.

Her world is Gaea – an asteroid converted to a space station, home, we are told, to the few thousand people who continue the human gene pool after the alien enemy of the dominant majoda, had destroyed Earth. Valkyr, Kyr for short, is a part of a warrior breed, ending her ten years as a cadet and awaiting assignment to one of the wings that sustains Gaea. That means either a fighting unit, one of the mechanical systems operations that sustain the station, or Nursery, responsible for producing the future of humanity.

Kyr is all duty and has scored highest in her small cohort, the Sparrows, in military and strategic skills, sure that she will be assigned to a lead battle unit. She and her twin brother Magnus, or Mags, their parents dead, raised under the tutelage of Aulus Jole, a commander of Gaea and survivor of Earth, were perfect candidates to be humanity’s next heroes in fighting the hated majo. But then Kyr hears from the brilliant but obnoxious Avi that Magnus refused his assignment, was dismissed as a traitor and has left Gaea. That’s just the beginning of the world-unraveling story that challenges Kyr’s beliefs and hurls her into a universe of multiple realities.

She has a lot to overcome to find the person she could be. Raised to endure the extremes of violence and physical endurance, she unquestioningly accepted beliefs in genetic superiority of her people and the inferiority of other races. At one point she compares a captive majo to the animals people had once kept as pets on Earth. She accepts the hierarchical ranking of human talent as essential to the orderly functioning of the small society of Gaea. It is only the shock she receives when getting her permanent assignment to one of Gaea’s divisions that she starts to see things differently. From then on, we start to see as she does that things are not at all as she had believed them to be until major upheavals change everything.
..............
This is a novel that repays close reading and requires suspension of judgment until the whole of Kyr’s experience comes into view. It is a strange coming of age story that delivers a lot of excitement and breath-taking shifts. Some Desperate Glory is great space opera on many levels.

Thank you to Netgalley and Macmillan-Tor/Forge, Tordotcom for this advanced copy. All opinions are my own.

Wow. I was blown away by this book!

Kyr has trained her entire life to avenge Earth's destruction aboard Gaea station with her mess, the Sparrows. She expects to be placed in a fighting wing, but instead is placed in Nursery to bear humanity's future children. Shocked, and a little disillusioned, Kyr takes destiny into her own hands, with a captive alien and another Gaean. What follows is a heartwrenching tale through space, time, and different dimensions.

Everything about this book was incredible. Kyr goes through grief, disillusionment, and grapples with understanding who the "good" guys are, if there are any. This book explores what it means to be sentient, empathetic, what family is, and how to stand up for what's right. This book is also very heavy, as it deals with ideas such as indoctrination, eugenics, mass murder, cult-like communities, abusers, suicide, and the literal weight of the world. All was very well handled, with grace and empathy. It also featured many different types of relationships throughout contexts - whether it be familial, abuser/abusee, romantic, or interspecies. The characters were extremely complex, all wrapped up in their own biases and background while trying to make sense of the truth around them.

Though the beginning was a bit slow, it sped up quickly and alternated between medium and fast-paced. It was a very entertaining read, I was on the edge of my seat the entire time and felt extremely emotional by the end. The prose was beautiful but very readable, and I never felt like it was going over my head, nor that it was a simplistic read for the beach (though I did read this on the beach successfully since I couldn't put it down).

Overall, this was an incredible book that will definitely make my best book of the year list.

You will like this if you like: space operas, multiple dimensions, aliens, sci-fi, cults, strong emotions, heartbreaking conflict, and complicated characters.

StoryGraph review is being posted on 3/27/23 and an Instagram review with a buzzword graphic will be posted on 4/9/23.

Some Desperate Glory packs a great deal into this stand alone story. Our main character, Kyr, has been raised with a radical isolationist group of humans who survived the destruction of earth and swear to never forget in seeking revenge on the race that caused that destruction. We follow her as the ideas she has been indoctrinated with are challenged as her world expands beyond the station where she was raised. This premise sets up an interesting and laudable deconstruction of how fascism manipulates and controls through propaganda.

My experience reading was very divided between the first 1./2 (which I did not enjoy and almost DNF'd) and the second 1/2 which is far more engaging and interesting. The pace picks up, the characters become far more dynamic and I was enthralled in wanting to know how it would resolve. In hindsight though, I don't know if this completely makes up for the first 1/2. While it may be worth it for some, it may not be for others.

Because the novel is told through Kyr's perspective, and she internalizes racist, xenophobic homophobic and transphobic ideologies, she gives voice to these ideas repeatedly. For example, as a sign of disrespect she purposely misgenders a nonbinary alien character as "it " or "whatever" instead of the preferred "they/them." in ways that could be hard to read. Moreover, she is so self-absorbed none of the other characters like her, and neither do we as readers. We are supposed to understand this is part of her programing, but she is so complicit in it at times it is hard to care. I think had this encompassed closer to a third, rather than 1/2 of the book, it may be less glaring, but it went on far too long for me.

Secondly- while this is advertised as a queer normative world and comparisons have been made to Gideon the Ninth, know that the sapphic romance implied is even more scant. A M/M romance is featured more in depth but one of the characters here is also a deeply problematic ass. I also felt uncomfortable with the representation of nonbinary identity as "alien" without any human corollary. This character was one of the most interesting for me, but they seemed to deserve more than one of the revelations Kyr learns- "Aliens are people too"-- this seems to me to problematically reinforce the idea of gender nonconforming as "other" more than it subverts it as human. The Majoda also plays into the trope of the enlightened magical character there for special inspiration for the main character who is centered.

Even so, and without spoilers- there is a clear point 1/2 way where things change, and from that point forward I was hooked despite my misgivings. We can argue about plausibility and disbelief in world building. There isn't much, but I don't need it explained to me to enjoy it and any plot holes or leaps didn't bug me. I was invested in what would happen next and I was mostly happy with the conclusion.

But as I contemplated my review, I still have to ask myself was it worth enduring the first 1/2, and I am honestly still not sure. I do appreciate that the author gives clear content warnings at the beginning. "Some Desperate Glory contains sexist, homophobic, transphobic, racist and ableist attitudes, sexual assault, violence, child abuse, radicalization as child abuse, genocide, suicidal ideation, and suicide. " That's a lot to absorb. Tesh herself has said he world is dark, but not hopeless. I'd agree, but proceed with caution.

Thanks to Tor.Com for allowing me access to an eARC through NetGalley in exchange for this fair review.

This is a hard book to review for me. I don’t have a whole lot to say about this book, because overall it was just okay. The concept was really cool, but nothing about it really stood out for me and it was a pretty mediocre space opera. I think a lot of people will love this, but for someone who reads a lot of science fiction it might feel a bit generic.

The main thing I have to comment on is the main character. It’s been a long time since I so fiercely despised a main character. She was so awful that I almost DNFed the book because I could barely stand to read her POV. I mean, yeah that’s totally the point – I get it, she’s been brainwashed as a super soldier to follow without question. But holy god. It went far beyond that tbh, because Kyr was a straight asshole. She was horrible to everyone around her. She was selfish, entitled, full of herself, had zero regard or respect for anyone around her, and she was ignorant on top of that. The ignorance can be chalked up to her upbringing and background, but everything else was just because she was a terrible person.

"[Kyr] had never understood why anyone would let a sex thing distract them so much. It worried her a little that Vic was being so visibly stupid about it. She was already so jumpy and fluttery so much of the time. It would be embarrassing for all of them if she got gossiped about."

That quote was after a Vic got separated from a girlfriend she CLEARLY adored. In another part, Kyr dresses down a younger girl and her team for wasting water, which was totally reasonable – except, she went above and beyond and outright humiliated the girl. (during which there was this gem: 'And she was enjoying, as she usually did, being in the right.' Barf.) She takes credit for others’ accomplishments and acts like they wouldn’t have said accomplishments if it weren’t for her, which is just gross. (Oh and another fun line: 'Kyr had tried and failed to teach her, and if she couldn’t do it, no one could.') She treated other people like shit, then acted like they were the assholes (specifically, Avi). She treated other people like shit, then was all surprised when people didn’t like her or wouldn’t cooperate with her.

She did have growth, thankfully. I never ended up actually liking her, but she at least realized she was wrong and that she was horrible to people. I didn’t really care about any of the other characters, either, except Yiso. I did love Yiso! None of the rest were particularly compelling or relatable for me.

The Majo were interesting, and so was the Wisdom, but sometimes parts of it were a little hard to picture because everything was a bit vague.

I just finished this book, and I'm reeling.

This book is built on the notion that the rest of the universe sees humans as, basically, orcs. Humans are bigger, stronger, faster, and tougher than all other sentient species, and among the most warlike. When humanity made its way to the stars, of course war broke out between us and the Majo, an interspecies Federation governed by an AI called "the Wisdom" with immense reality-bending powers. The Wisdom decided the best course of action was to destroy Earth entirely.

Jump forward almost twenty years, and we get to our story. Valkyr is a cadet on Gaea Station, a rock with a few of humanity's surviving dreadnoughts strapped to it & cannibalized to provide support to a few thousand surviving humans.

"While we live, the enemy shall fear us" are the words they live by. Valkyr has spent her life training ferociously, determined to dedicate her life to humanity's never-ending war for vengeance. The book begins as she is finishing her cadet years and awaiting her assignment … which is to the so-called Nursery Wing. Her skills as a soldier are not nearly as important, in Gaea Station Command's judgment, as her capacity to bear the next generation of humanity.

For the first part of this book, I really *disliked* Valkyr. The universe, the Majo, the Wisdom, Gaea Station, and the long-ended-yet-never-ending war are all more complicated than she was raised to believe. And she is so heavily propagandized that not only does she take everything she was taught as truth, she is violently (literally) against having those "truths" challenged. Being in the head of someone who believes so many obvious lies is a frustrating experience, to say the least.

But luckily being frustrated by her doesn't mean I didn't empathize with her, and her eyes do gradually open. As the book goes on she confronts the truth of the war, her childhood, her prejudices, and above all herself. Which is the beginning of the story rather than the end.

This is a masterpiece of a space opera. It’s tense, it’s relentless, it tears your heart to pieces and stitches it back together so it can tear it apart again.

Content warning for this book: graphic depiction of suicide.

I often struggle with media that relates to time loops or time travel, so I don’t think this book was really meant for me. I had a hard time getting into it since it hits the ground running so fast. I was often a bit confused about what was happening, especially later in the book. I did get more invested as the book went on and the main character grew/became more tolerable, but by that point I had struggled too much to really get into it. There is some great writing and I can tell the author put a lot of effort into creating this world, I just personally might need a little more hand holding with sci-fi like this.

Some Desperate Glory is a fun yet dark post-apocalyptic space opera with a delightfully unlikable female protagonist. It took me some time to get hooked, but once I did, I didn't want to stop reading. I thought all of the characters were well-rounded and lovable, even if they made some (very) morally questionable decisions at times. My main issue with this book was that it took a lot of effort to understand the world-building, and I don't even think I fully grasped the extent of it by the end. I also felt that the end was a bit rushed - it didn't seem like we got closure for all of the characters. Overall though, I thought this was an enjoyable read and I would definitely recommend sci-fi lovers to give it a shot!