Fair warning that if an author ever needs to assure you in the beginning of the book that their story will have a happy ending, you might need to keep a box of tissues next to you while you read.
I think this book is great for fans of Felix ever after, looking for something similar. The stories both feature queer, trans, artistic characters discovering their identity and falling in love in the process, and yet the stories are still vastly different from one another, so you don't feel like you're reading the exact same story.
Underhill didn't hold anything back, showing the flaws of the main character and the mistakes we make when we're young and dumb and in love, showing the fluidity of identity and the joy that shines through among the challenges and sadness that Miles feels.
An excellent book that all teens today, especially queer or questioning teens, should pick up.
I'm excited to see more of what this author comes up with in the future :)

THIS BOOK! This cover, this growth arc, this story. Miles is a newly out trans boy fighting to not let his life fall apart in the aftermath. So on New Years, he sets two resolutions: that he'll get his boyfriend back, who broke up with him after he came out, and that he'll win the state piano competition. But as the year progresses, and with the help of his friends, a new piano teacher, and the new guy in school who sees Miles for who he is, and just might like him for all of it, Miles slowly starts to reassess how important those resolutions are, and who he truly wants to be.

This was so good!!!! I gobbled it up in a few hours (was not the intention, I had plans this afternoon, but we're here now). Miles' growth through the book is expectedly messy, considering he's a 16 year old kid, famously a complicated time to be figuring out who you are, and then adding on coming out to his family, friends, and everyone in his life. Eric and Stefania are undeniably the breakout stars of the book, I'm convinced if everyone had one of each in their lives, there would be no problems left in the world. I didn't LOVE the drama the author went with in terms of Miles' friends, and then even when it was happening, it felt like it was setting something up that never happened. But I'll take one subpar B-plot when everything else was stellar.

Note that there are instances of both past and present transphobia, homophobia, queerphobia, racism, sexism, all the things. They are, imo, handled in a way that kept them grounded in reality without making them the focal point of the story, and as the author says in his introduction, the story is all about trans/queer joy, and does deliver its happy ending.

4 stars

You can read all of my reviews at Nerd Girl Loves Books.

I loved this book so much!! Miles recently came out as trans, prompting his football star boyfriend Shane to break up with him. Miles is determined to get Shane back and beat his archnemesis in the Midwest’s biggest classical piano competition, all before the end of the year. To that end, Miles begins taking lessons with a new, terrifying piano teacher who tells him that he's playing like he doesn't know who he is. What? As Miles struggles with all the changes in his life, he meets new kid Eric. Eric is a talented cartoonist that is comfortable in his own skin and seems to get Miles, something Miles is not used to since he came out. After pretending to be a couple to get invited to a popular couples-only Valentine's Day party, Miles and Eric's fake kiss turns into something real. But this doesn't fit into Miles plans, and besides, there has to be a catch as to why Eric likes him. Right?

I loved Miles and Eric and their budding relationship took me back to my high school days when I was not very cool or confidant in my own skin, and always looked for a catch when someone expressed interest in me. The story is so relatable, painful and heartfelt that I just wanted to wrap my arms around Miles and let him know to hang in there and trust himself. It's cliché, I know, but it does get better and time, age and distance does make things a bit easier to deal with. Well, mostly. Aren't we all awkward 16 year olds now and then, even into our adulthood? It was a joy to follow Miles on his journey to redefine his relationship with Shane, himself, and his family.

The way this book lovingly describes music and art, it's clear the author has a life-long affinity for them both. Having loved them my entire life as well, it was a pleasure to read a book steeped in the richness both give our lives. This book is great for all ages, especially if you've ever had a crush, been crushed, or wanted to beat the bully just once. I can't recommend it enough and wish I could read it for the first time again.

I received a complimentary copy of this book from NetGalley and St. Martin's Press, Wednesday Books. All opinions are my own.

Always the Almost is a love letter to trans joy, coming of age narratives, classical music, and I recommend this book enough!

The author mentions in their note that trans and queer teens experience so much “Not Joy” in their lives that his focus in telling Miles’ story was to put the joy front and center—not necessarily Miles’ trans identity.

From the beginning, readers will empathize with Miles and his quest to prove himself…to himself. He’s surrounded by people who believe him when he tells them who he is, but Miles remains his own harshest critic. Not only is this a common trope with young adults, but it’s an entirely universal experience that lets Miles’ struggle transcend the page and leap onto the sofa next to you.

Underhill’s writing is personable, quiet, and engaging. The entourage of friends and family members couple with a tone of closeness allow the reader to go beyond a casual observer and truly feel like an additional party to each scene.

10/10 this high school English teacher highly recommends all libraries and teachers add this beautiful tome of queer joy to their schools.

Thank you for this review in exchange for my honest review.
This book lost my interest pretty quickly because of the authors writing style. It just didn’t grip me.

This book was really good for the beginning half and then well the character ruined it all for himself screwing everybody in his life over. Honestly the only redeeming character was the love interest who I felt very bad for. I won't give a star rating because I dnf'ed after the cheating.

At first I was worried I wouldn’t enjoy this because I really don’t care about playing piano (like I gave up watching Your Lie in April because there was too much piano and I was bored). But I stayed for the love story and friendships, and by the middle I was actually really invested in the piano scenes. I actually found myself feeling nervous for Miles before and during the recitals. I loved this book more than I expected to, and the characters are all perfectly, lovably flawed. It is effortlessly inclusive. I laughed out loud multiple times. 3.5 stars, very interested to see what the author does in the future.

This is a perfect book. Sixteen year old Miles Jacobson recently came out as trans and two weeks later was dumped by his boyfriend. While his friend group doesn’t treat him any differently than they always have, the same can’t be said for his parents. Miles is an incredibly talented pianist, who wants to finally beat his arch nemesis at the Midwest’s biggest classical piano competition while at the same time winning back the affections of his ex. But when proudly Queer cartoonist Eric starts up at Miles’ school, his brain and his heart begin to war with another.

Miles is an incredible character and is going to resonate with readers. I just know it. He is strong and vulnerable, fearful yet brave, and just a wonderful example of coming into your own self with confidence. @elliott.roi.reads said it best when they described Eric as a precious cinnamon roll! He is just so sweet and the perfect love interest for Miles. Also, how I wish I had a little doodle of a waffle playing an instrument 😭

Rachel is a goddamn hero, if a little intense at times. I so appreciated her convictions and her unabashed willingness to stand up for what’s right, especially when it comes to her friends. Ok and plus also Stefania is EVERYTHING and she reminded me so strongly of my past music teachers that I got me all nostalgic (which is not an emotion I normally have regarding high school 😅)

I am wholly enamored with Edward Underhill's debut and eagerly await his next book!

A sweet, precious LGBTQ+ work of fiction. The cover art is stunning.

**Big thanks to netgalley and the publisher for the earc copy in exchange for an honest review.

Read this one so fast and enjoyed it immensely! Super cute protagonist and a fresh perspective. I loved all the music connections and all the side stories, also! Hope the author will make this a series and write about some of the other characters. It was also such a realistic story with all the conflicted teenage emotions and missing something safe. I'll probably read everything else this author puts out there!

I loved this story! The characters were realistic, the plot and challenges were realistic. I loved that the main character was trans but also had depth, along with other queer characters in the story. I also appreciate that the author himself is trans. As I was reading this I couldn't help but think of all the students and young people that would benefit from hearing a story from the voice and perspective of a young transgender man dealing with being a teenager and then some.

Always the Almost is an honest and joyful story about music, trans joy and self-love. It follows Miles, a recently out trans boy and pianist who is balancing romance, friendship and a new, slightly eccentric piano teacher. Miles' journey is messy and there were times I just wanted to shake him, but that's part of YA romance charm. Miles felt honest and real, as did his whole friend group and love interest. Eric, the love interest, is so sweet and accepting, and felt like just what Miles needed. There is a plotline involving Miles' ex who dumped him after he came out because he doesn't like guys. This gets really frustrating, but that's my only negative.

I was nervous that this wouldn't work for me because I don't find piano particularly compelling, but the way Edward Underhill writes about it felt like pure magic. I found myself looking forward to every time Miles performed, and I wished I could see and hear it. I love how it became such an expression of joy for him. I also liked the support system Miles has as pianist. His teacher, Stefania, is so wonderful and easily the best character. The other competitors aren't all good, but there are quite a few that have his back, no matter what. Then there's all the friends and family that watch hours of piano just for him. Its all just really heartwarming.

Overall, I adored this. I think its a beautiful expression of trans joy, one that queer teens desperately need right now. I can not wait to read what this author does next, and to encourage all of my LGBT+ students to pick this up. So glad I got to to read this.

Thank you NetGalley and Wednesday books for providing me access to an eARC of Edward Underhill’s phenomenal book, Always the Almost. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

Summary:

Miles Jacobson is a newly out sixteen year-old trans boy who has two goals for the new year: get his ex back and defeat his piano nemesis. Miles doesn’t plan on meeting Eric Mendez, a cartoonist and new queer kid from Seattle. Miles is so used to being almost good enough that he doesn’t know how to react to Eric’s instant acceptance and the romantic feelings that blossom between them.

Thoughts

This book is really interesting. I really like the way Miles’s piano teacher focuses on small technique things that can help him improve, but mostly discusses who he is and how that will show in his music. Miles wants his piece to be joyful. One of the major themes of this book is finding the joy even when that seems like an impossible task.

Another thing I liked about this book is the way that cheating is discussed. Without going into details, I feel like it fairly presented both sides without justifying the cheating or completely demonizing the characters who cheat.

That’s something I appreciated about this book in general is that the characters have room to grow. Everyone is humanized and has a chance to treat people better. But at the same time, the pain that multiple characters cause others is not swept under the rug either. This is especially true with Miles’s parents who both fail to fully accept him for who he is, but do make an effort to learn and do better by Miles.

This is a very human book about self-discovery, learning to forgive oneself and others, young love, and being a good musician. I recommend this book to anyone wanting to read about a fight for queer joy.

5 out of 5 stars

As a transmasc percussionist from the midwest, Always the Almost was a poignant read. I deeply related to Miles on many levels, in a way that it was simultaneously heartbreaking and encouraging to read how parts of his story played out.
I enjoyed the narrative, and though things were messy, some real life relationships never get the closure we think they deserve, so it felt real. The story left me wondering if I’d had books like this when I was younger, if it would be easier for me to handle it all now.

Is it possible to give a book 6 stars? This one deserves it.

"I am queer. I am trans. I am full of joy."


I frequently see people requesting stories of queer/trans joy instead of hurt. The world is so full of hurt and hatred. This is a PERFECT book to pick up instead of doom-scrolling. The writing style is comparable to Rachel Lynn Solomon and Mason Deaver, and the story is in the vein of Becky Albertalli.

TW: body dysphoria, transphobia, deadnaming, nonconsensual kiss

While there are trigger warnings I wouldn't classify any as severe. The story shows the transphobia, but focuses on the gender euphoria Miles feels. His journey with piano, his relationship with his parents, his desire to understand himself are all front-facing. The romance is plot B, and is the kind to make your cheeks hurt from smiling. The side characters are important and active, but don't pull focus from the core of Miles' coming of age. I would die for Stefania, no question.

This book is wonderfully wholesome and happy-making and will make you wish you had paid more attention in those piano lessons your mom paid for because maybe you could experience the joy of playing a 20-minute sonato. Or maybe not. IDK I hate practicing so much I gave up on every hobby besides reading.

Rep: trans & gay MC, Latinx queer/questioning sc, Latinx sc with Down Syndrome, lesbian Jewish-atheist-pagan sc, lesbian Asian sc, sapphic side couple

Thanks to Wednesday Books for the arc in exchange for an honest review.

The rumors are true. This was a wonderful read! I loved Miles and his journey. I loved getting to know him as a pianist, and a queer trans kid who just wants to find himself and his joy.

Also, this is a certified cozy read!

This book was sweet and definitely a solid YA read, but there were a few things about it that bugged me. One of my biggest pet peeves in fiction is when a character doesn't defend themselves when there's a misunderstanding. When Eric saw Shane and Miles kissing, Miles so easily could have said "Shane kissed me" rather than agreeing that he initiated it, BECAUSE HE REALLY DIDN'T. So I feel like that could have been solved so much quicker. Though, I suppose the emotional cheating was important to address.

Another thing that bugged me a bit was how quickly the two main characters got together. I was looking for more development in that realm, though I understand why the author made that pacing decision.

Overall, this book is really sweet and fun, but it didn't do a lot more for me than that. I'm glad books like this exist for the teens that need them, and that's all it really comes down too.

This vibrant cover first caught my attention. Then I discovered the MC plays piano (I played years ago), and when I read it was blurbed by Phil Stamper (just finished his Golden Boys duology), I knew I needed to read this novel.

Miles is a trans-boy who’s recently come out, and he has two goals – win back his ex-boyfriend (a school jock who dumped him) and beat his arch nemesis (Miles has lost to him every year) at a classical piano competition. Miles is also experiencing struggles at school – teachers referring to him with the wrong pronouns/name and bathroom dilemmas, and piano competitions – trolls making horrible comments on message boards. Luckily he has some very protective friends to help him out. Every spare moment he has is spent practicing piano, usually in the school auditorium. And that’s where he meets new student Eric who’s working on his comic series.

Eric is laid-back, adorable, and he sees Miles – it’s easy to understand why Miles is attracted to him. I enjoyed seeing their friendship develop and turn into something more. Eric’s scenes with his younger sister are heartwarming and funny and allow the reader to see another side of him.

As for Miles – I wanted to wring his neck at certain points. Initially he’s pretty selfish and ignores what’s happening with his friends. Because of some of his actions, he’s forced to take a closer look at himself and how he’s treated others. It’s a wonderful character arc. I loved Miles’s piano teacher. She’s tough, talented, and nudges him (not gently) into thinking about who he is and why he plays.

This is a heart-warming, joyful novel with messy, flawed characters and an incredible debut. This author is definitely on my watchlist, and I’m anxious to see what he does next.

I received a complimentary copy of this book from the publisher through NetGalley. Opinions expressed in this review are completely my own.

I really enjoyed Always the Almost. Miles's journey of self discovery and acceptance was inspiring. I liked the parallel of him finding his way as a musical artist with him figuring out how who he wants to be as a person. The side characters in this were fun, and I loved how supportive and sweet Eric was. I wished that Mile's friends were a little more fleshed out, but overall I felt that the writing and story made up for the slight lack of character development. I will definitely be reading whatever Edward Underhill releases next!

I think this book is really cute. A good debut.
3.5

I’m an ex violinist so I REALLY enjoy the music storyline. He’s very good, very realistic and there weren’t the usual little mistakes that always are there where authors write about classic music.
I also like the rep, especially the trans rep. I don’t buy a lot the love story, if I have to be honest: Eric and Miles are cute, sure, but I don’t get the chemistry. I think Miles have more chemistry with Shane, but I don’t ship them either.
However, I can’t wait for the next book of this author. I think he can write great things!

Thank you Netgalley and Wednesday Books for the ARC!