Every once in awhile we get lucky and we hear a story that affects us in a long lasting and profound way. This was The Collected Regrets of Clover for me. A uniquely told story about a death doula, it’s a beautiful, unique, and moving book about what it means to live. I loved this book and it’s characters, I loved the musings on grief and death. I found myself highlighting so many passages I think I have at least 20 new favorite quotes. I will be thinking about this book for quite awhile and I highly suggest you pick it up too. I’m going to end this review with a few of the quotes that really struck me:
-“Maybe we have different business with the same souls in each lifetime. And it doesn’t always work out how we want it to in every one of them.”

-“Grief is just love looking for a place to settle”

Such am endearing story. I was expecting The Collected Regrets of Clover to be a bit more morbid and dark, a little depressing but it was actually inspired and uplifting. Yes, Clover is a death doula and yes death is one of the main topics.. it's so much more than that. It's about how people live their lives and how we think we have time to figure it all out. When in reality things happen everyday and we need to live a life we don't regret. Clover as a character is flawed, and at times I wasn't her biggest fan. But there are some great supporting characters that help the story move forward.

Thank you to netgalley and the publisher for an opportunity to read and review honestly an advanced digital copy.

The challenges I had with THE COLLECTED REGRETS OF CLOVER are that I read it right after CASSANDRA IN REVERSE and the books share some similarities that border on tropes. The biggest: the death of parents, not witnessed by children but left poorly explained to them, will be so calamitous to their development that they will be severely disturbed as adults, specifically unable to connect with other humans. This developmental/emotional disability will camouflage behavior that can best be described as autism spectrum disorders but has not been. I don’t know why that would function as a plot device when the author(s) are capable of telling such good stories and write so well. I admit I am not appreciative of it. So, that’s my bias. I admit it. This book is well-liked and otherwise engaging. I received my copy from the publisher through NetGalley.

Know that this might be a painful read if you've recently experienced a death and are grieving but know also that it's a well written and thoughtful look at life, death, and personal growth. Clover's parents died when she was 6; she moved in with her grandfather, who showed but never said he loved her. She has had a lifelong fascination with death and now works as a death doula, sitting by the side of those about to die. It's a small life with only one friend- her upstairs neighbor Leo who is 87- a dog, and two cars. And it all changes when she meets Sebastian, who hires her to spend time with his grandmother and her new downstairs neighbor. She's a fascinating character who is quite self aware. There's interesting insight here as well as a bit of romance. Thanks to Netgalley for the ARC. A good read.

I am a firm believer that books come into our lives when we need them. This one has been on my shelf for months but I finally felt compelled to pick it up the other day and once I did, I couldn’t put it down. Clover, the main character, is prickly and as a reader, at times I struggled to root for her. But the book beautifully addressed grief in many forms and was unexpected in many ways. 3.5/5 stars

I wouldn’t have imagined a story starring a death doula would be quite so enjoyable. Clover isn’t exactly antisocial, she just never learned how to be social so she’s a loner who works with dying people. I loved her personality and felt for her at each awkward attempt to talk to others. The novel contains several apt observations of people’s reactions to another’s impending death and reflections on life regrets.

Thanks to NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for the ARC to read and review.

The Collected Regrets of Clover is a debut novel about a death doula who, in caring for others at the end of their life, has forgotten how to live her own.

Clover spends so much time with the dying that she has no life of her own, until she meets Sebastian in a death cafe. Sebastian hires Clover to help his dying grandma Claudia.

Clover is very apathetic and intuitive in her job; in her personal life she is a bit of an odd duck. She lives such a solitary life, she doesn't have a single friend apart from her geriatric neighbor Leo. She is in her mid-30s. She is too naive. She has never dated, never even been kissed. As she finds herself struggling to navigate the uncharted roads of romance and friendship, Clover is forced to examine what she really wants, and whether she’ll have the courage to go after it.

I found the concept of death doula quite interesting. Even though this book is the author's debut novel she comes from a journalism background so she clearly has done her research about death doulas. I really enjoyed the way the tidbits were sprinkled throughout the story about different end-of-life rituals and traditions from different cultures.

Even though the book is about dying people, it is never morbid. It is even uplifting in ways. Only, I anticipated feeling bigger emotions but sadly, I didn't. There were a few cliched plot points that could have been avoided (going on a trip to find a client's long lost love or checking off the things that her clients regretted not doing)

The Collected Regrets of Clover was a good, bittersweet story that conveyed a beautiful message about living life with as few regrets as possible. It was easy to read. I enjoyed it.

3.5 stars

This was a combination of book/audiobook thanks to the publishers.
Grief is just love looking for a place to settle.
This book has a unique theme, a death doula. I am vaguely familiar with that term, but finding it in a modern setting was something I didn’t expect.

A slow paced story, I mostly listened to the audiobook since it wasn't until the last third that things started to really grab my attention.

Clover is an interesting character, she has demons of the past which is reflected in her lifestyle. Given her chosen occupation one would thing this would be a depressing and gloomy story. But it isn't, I found it heartwarming that those without family or friends had someone with them in the end.

There were parts of the story that just didn't resonate with me, aside from the slow pace. Though she grew up sheltered, for someone who has traveled the world by herself and given her job I found her to be somewhat immature in both action and her thought life. However, the audiobook is very well done, and without it, I might have given up on the book.

Overall, The Collected Regrets of Clover is a unique and heartwarming story that will appeal to many readers. While it may not have been my cup of tea, others have given it a higher rating, so it's worth checking out. The book is set to release next week, so keep an eye out for it.

My thanks to both Macmillan Audio and St. Martins Press for advanced copies in exchange for a honest review.

I need to preface this review with this; this book is absolutely NOT the kind of book I gravitate to [the blurb makes it seem like there is more romance than there is, and what is in there is so real-to-life I was weeping at several spots] as I am not a fan of contemporary or LitFic at all [I usually run hollering and screaming when presented with either LOL], but it was a teeny bit intriguing, so when the publisher approached me to read/review this, I reluctantly said yes.

Imagine my surprise when I started this and finally emerged, 4 hours later [on the first night of listening], weeping and also NOT wanting to quit AND wondering just when this author, whom I do not know, entered my brain and wrote about my life. I am completely gobsmacked. This book was absolutely glorious. Gorgeous. Very much what I needed right now [it is tough to live in extreme loneliness, but much like Clover in the book, one adapts and learns to live their life the best way they know how within that loneliness, and it was one of the many things I completely related to within Clover's story], and I am 100% glad I read this [it will stay with me for a very long time].

I am not really going to give a bigger review than this, simply because I think one should experience this with no preconceived notions [ignore the blurb too - it is VERY misleading] and just let the story of Clover unfold naturally. It will be a better read for you if you do it that way.

I have had some real trouble with narrators lately and I knew nothing about the narrator for this book when I requested it,[she was completely new to me] and that always makes me nervous. Well, I totally lucked out here too. The narration completely makes this book. The narrator reads this much like she IS Clover and she is just having a conversation with you and it was just fantastic. I have a new favorite narrator and will be looking for other things she narrates. What a great job!!!

I was asked by St. Martin's Press to read and review this book and I thank them, NetGalley, Mikki Brammer, Jennifer Pickens - Narrator, and Macmillan Audio for providing this ARC and audiobook ARC in exchange for an honest review.

This was a beautiful book filled with many lessons for a life well lived!

Clover's unusual job as a death dula sprung up from her early encounter with death when her parents died when she was 6, and then again when her beloved grandfather who raised her died alone. People she meets aren't very accepting of her job, either scornful, disbelieving or disgusted, so she's chosen to be an introvert, rarely socializing, never dating and spending her time watching rom-coms alone in the apartment she and her grandfather lived in, still filled with his belongings.

A chance encounter at a death cafe introduces Clover to Sebastian. While this doesn't pan out into a romance, it does provide Clover with a job, helping his grandmother ease into death. She and Claudia become close, and Clover begins to ease out of her self-imposed isolation and experience life. Also thanks to Claudia, Clover meets Hugo, the grandson of Claudia's former lover.

Death and its impact on loved ones is very sensitively handled by the author. This is not a morbid book, it is hopeful and uplifting. As someone still struggling with grief, many of the passages spoke to me. I actually wish someone like Clover had been with my Dad when he died.

Thanks to the author, publisher and NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review this book, but my opinions are my own.

The Collected Regrets of Clover by Mikki Brammer ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

A huge thank you to @netgalley and @stmartinspress for eARC. This one comes out next week.

For those of you who selected this as your #bookofthemonth book, well done! I loved this book!

I can only describe this book as a love letter to life. It was about friendships, taking risks, and grief. More than once I thought ‘Brené Brown would approve this message.’

I loved Clover, the death doula. I found her characterization important and her growth realistic. The other characters were well developed and added to the story.

This is a book that will make you feel all the things. It’s about being human and being alive. It’s about happiness and sadness. It’s about coping and moving on. Seriously, check it out!

3.75 stars.

I’d never read a book about a death doula before and this one was interesting. Western culture doesn’t like to talk about death but this novel raises the topic in an open, positive way. Clover is a death doula supporting people as they die by helping them talk about regrets, life lessons and acceptance. She, however, has trouble applying these lessons to her own life. She is a loner and lonely but learns to open up once she befriends one of her clients.

Clover was likeable and her relationship with her grandfather which provides the backdrop for the novel was lovely to read about. I found the topic of this novel interesting but the pacing was very, very slow and only picked up 60% or so in. You would think a novel about a death doula would be depressing but it’s not. Overall, I am glad that I picked this novel up as I learned about a topic I was unfamiliar with and the story gave me food for thought about not only how we live but how we die.

Thanks to St. Martin’s Press and Netgalley for this complimentary copy. All opinions are my own.

“The truth is, grief never really goes away. Someone told me once that it’s like a bag that you always carry— it starts out as a large suitcase, and as the years go by, it might reduce to the size of a purse, but you carry it forever.”

Read/Listen if you like:
♥️ Heartwarming Stories
❤️‍🩹 Healing after Trauma & Loss
💔 If You Have Ever Felt Lonely
⏳Looking Back on Regrets
🗽 Books Set in NY
🌀 Quirky Characters
🕰️ Coming of Age Stories

“But the secret to a beautiful death is to live a beautiful life.”

This one was such a heartwarming story with coming of age vibes for our 36 year old main character Clover whose life has been full of death to the point a natural career choice ended up being a death doula. Clover is a quirky introvert who was shunned by her peers at a young age due to her reaction to death that came across odd that set the trajectory of her life to be more of a loner who found comfort in death and made it her career and hobby to attend death cafe’s while keeping others mostly at arm’s length.

We follow Clover with one particular individual as she provides comfort and support during their final days, and while doing so, Clover starts to experience parts of life she never let herself live prior, including intimate relationships. This was truly a life changing patient in Clover’s journey that allowed her to truly start living.

I loved the journey of self discovery she went on as she evaluates the meaning of a life well lived and unpacks some of the regrets of those she has sat with during their final moments and correlates those regrets to her own life.

If you are looking for a thought provoking and heartwarming story of an introvert coming out of their shell and living life, I highly recommend checking this one out!

“Instead of constantly asking ourselves the question of why we’re here, maybe we should be savoring a simpler truth: We are here.”

Thank you St. Martin’s Press for my ARC in exchange for my honest review!

I wanted to read this book as it was surrounding a death doula and was immediately interested. It was a beautiful and poignant story with a wonderful message. I was truly surprised and so happy it ended up on my radar!

4.5 Stars!

I had this book for months before I finally decided to read it. Every time I read the blurb I was afraid it was going to be too depressing and just wasn’t in the mood for that type of book. Well, I’m sorry I waited so long to read it. I didn’t find this book depressing at all – although I will admit I shed some tears towards the end. I really liked the uniqueness of this story. I’ve never heard of a death doula or death cafes before.

I guess this book is really about Clover and how she dealt with death after the death of her own grandfather. For me, the book caused me to be introspective. Having lost my mother a couple of years ago, I actually found some comfort in this book. It also enlightened me on perhaps living a better life. After all, “The secret to a beautiful death is living a beautiful life.”

3.75 stars rounded up, I think.

The Collected Regrets of Clover follows a woman in her mid-thirties who is a death doula, essentially a person who helps others in their final moments greet death. Clover chose this profession after not being present when her grandfather (her only parental figure) died alone. This story begins as Clover enters a phase of transition in her life.

I liked a lot about this book: I liked the way the characters were written as flawed but lovable and relatable people. I liked the conversations around death and grief. I liked the building of a community of misfits, and the recognition of how that community can be beneficial for people in multiple ways. The story was equal parts heavy, heartwarming, and light-hearted, which I think makes it a good beach read. It's not so heavy that it feels like an emotional gut punch, but it had a lot of one-liners to contemplate and a few tear-jerking moments.

Overall, a nice little read I'd compare to Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine in vibes and overall juggling heavy and light-hearted topics. If it sounds interesting to you, this title publishes with St. Martin's Press on May 9, 2023. Thank you to them and NetGalley for the advanced reader copy in exchange for an honest review!

Only recently did I learn that death doulas are a real thing, that there are people skilled in the art of helping others die with grace, dignity, and compassion. THE COLLECTED REGRETS OF CLOVER by Mike Brammer features the friendless, lonesome, solitary death doula Clover whose stifling and deadening life changes when a young man named Sebastian asks her to help his grandmother Claudia die well and a young woman named Sylvie moves into Clover's small apartment building. I will go no further with describing the events and the interwoven story of old friends, beloveds, family, and what it means to live well and die with grace except to say it was unpredictable and logical -- I completely trusted myself and the story in the hands of the talented author in weaving an exceptional tale with lush setting, deep character development, all the things that make for a deeply satisfying read that will remain with me for a very long time. I received a copy of this book and these opinions are my own, unbiased thoughts.

Clover came to an early acceptance of death and made a career out of helping others cope with the ends of their lives. She is a sweet and compassionate person with everyone but herself. In her work she is outgoing and intelligent. But on her own she is a naïve introvert, emotionally stunted by the otherness she has always felt due to her openness about death. In that way, this is the story of her coming into her own, and oddly enough accepting the one death that has overshadowed her own life. I liked the writing style and how the characters were subtly developed. Someone reading too quickly might miss little things here and there that really add depth to the story and characters. This is book to enjoy and maybe to take away some thoughts about how we all view mortality.

I loved Clover! What a lovely protagonist and such a noble profession. It's interesting to me that there is so much of a taboo around death doulas when no one bats an eye at a birth doula. For the most part, this was a wonderful book and I really felt for Clover and her life. Her relationship with her grandfather was heartbreaking in the best way possible, because they loved each other so much. Some might think that this obvious motivation for her becoming a death doula is a little corny, but within the confines of the story it completely makes sense.

I also loved her budding relationship with Sebastian as well as the friendship she forms with his grandmother, Claudia. Honestly, I would have been happy just reading an entire novel about the three of them and her quirky, fun neighbor downstairs who teaches Clover what it means to have a friend. The mission Clover and Sebastian go on to discover the truth about Claudia's love story felt a little rushed to me and like it was part of another story. I was so invested in Clover's life that I really didn't anything else.

For a book that talks so much about death, though, it was nice to see it handled with such sensitivity and lightness. Anyone wanting to learn more about death doulas should definitely check this out!

This was a deeply thoughtful book about life and death. It handles the questions about life choices. It also studies grief and how it affects us in a devastating and everlasting way. I loved the analogy that grief is like being caught in a dust storm - how we can't see through it in the beginning and even years later we may be hit by dust we discover in a crack. I loved the matter of fact, awkward and endearing character of Clover. This is a book which faces all the emotions - love, regret, anger, sorrow - and leaves the reader hopeful and eager to embrace life.