The Collected Regrets of Clover by Mikki Brammer

Have you heard of a death doula? That’s what Clover does, she takes care of people as they get ready for death. Sometimes for a night, sometimes for weeks or months leading up to it. Clover spends all her time soothing, caring for and assisting people get ready for the one thing most people fear.

This book was incredibly thought provoking. Clover is a powerful character. She is a lonely woman who has protected herself so thoroughly that she doesn’t have many relationships in her life. She is a bit stubborn and stuck in her ways. Until a series of people and events have her changing her ways begrudgingly.

I adored her grandfather and his thoughts on life. This book was heartbreaking but also so insightful and sweet. It had amazing reminders about making the most out of life but also how okay it is to grieve in your own way on your own timeline.

Thank you to @macmillan.audio for the audiobook and @stmartinspress for the ebook! This is out on May 9th.

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Clover is a death doula, shepherding people gently through their last days or hours of life and into death. She is also deeply lonely – a shy introvert by nature, with her beloved grandfather and only living relative passed on, she keeps to herself. If others reach out, she chooses to reject them before they have the chance to reject her, as they normally do when they find out what she does for a living. But a new neighbor and a new client open up her life in ways she never expected – and though it’s not always easy or comfortable, for the first time in years she finds herself willing to try.

Clover is someone for whom reaching out to others and leaving her comfort zone does not come naturally, and her introversion and sensitive nature is only made worse by the emotional trauma of a life of repeatedly getting her hopes up and being rejected, the anxiety that stems from that trauma, and the blame she places on herself for being out of the country when her grandfather died. She’s a complicated character, and I didn’t always find her easy to like, but I felt like that made her journey more compelling. I also liked the way the book explores how we think about dying, and how we treat the sick and the elderly. Overall it was a sweet novel with some poignant lessons about life, and a satisfying ending.

Representation: POC characters, bi/pan and polyamorous character

When I heard death doula, I immediately had to read it. The Collected Regrets of Clover wasn’t entirely about being a death doula like I anticipated, but I enjoyed it nonetheless. Clover has been acquainted with death since her childhood, when she lost her parents and was sent to live with her grandfather whom she didn’t really know. She keeps her heart guarded, letting no one in; she doesn’t even have friends. When a new client and a new neighbor come into her life, Clover realizes that through her work and her clients last words, there’s more to life than she’s been living. I found it to be endearing and sweet and loved her last client to pieces.

The Collected Regrets of Clover will be published 5/9. Thank you to the author Mikki Beamer and St. Martins Press for my review copy.

A beautiful book that explores the lessons learned of a death doula. Her journey to make sure people are not alone in the act of dying leads her to learn maybe she doesn’t need to be alone either.

Who knew a book that centers around death could be so cozy and heartwarming?

It also happens to be an insightful tearjerker so it offers something to satisfy a wide variety of readers.

I really enjoyed getting to know Clover. There were many aspects of her personality I found relatable and her character’s reflections on grief felt spot on to me.

The story goes just deep enough to satisfy intellect while remaining sweet throughout. It doesn’t take the path of least resistance, as the author had a few surprises up her sleeve, and I think she managed them quite well. I’ll admit the romantic aspect was making me nervous. I was quite pleased with how the author finally eased my concerns!

I found The Collected Regrets of Clover to be comforting, despite the difficult topic it tackles. I’d never heard of a death doula before and now see it as a beautiful service - one that I’m interested in possibly getting certified in one day. Ultimately, I gained so much from this meaningful book about loss.

I am immensely grateful to St. Martin’s Press and NetGalley for my copy. All opinions are my own.

The Collected Regrets of Clover was a beautiful and thoughtful read. It inspired thoughts around life and death, love and loss and the lessons that we learn through all of those stages of life. This is an emotional read that I would recommend for any reader who likes their books a little melancholic.

Thank you so much for allowing me to read this arc! This book was probably one of my top five for the year! I would highly recommend this book to anyone that may feel they need something heartwarming and reflective. How clover deals with grief in the story is often reflective of many of us. I seen myself a lot in clover and I think others might be able to as well. Every character was so beautifully written and easy to connect with and feel like you had a bond with them as well. This book is a five star read to me.

Thanks to Macmillan Audio and St. Martin's Press for the free copy.
This book is about Clover, a death doula. I had never read a book from this perspective, so I was intrigued as soon as I read the synopsis. I thought this profession was so interesting the more I learned about it from Clover. Death is such a hard thing for so many different reasons, so Clover's story and job were eye-opening, and I think lots of readers will learn about death and grief while reading this story. I enjoyed how Brammer wasn't afraid to talk about death in so many different forms and aspects. She had Clover dig deep into this topic, I think not only to help herself, but to engage the reader in thinking about this hard topic. She was able to illustrate death and grief in natural ways without making this story too depressing. It was heavy, but I didn't find it to be overwhelmingly sad. My only complaint is the detachment of Clover throughout the first 70% of the story. I wanted to feel a bit more than I was. But the ending did help make up for this.
Jennifer Pickens did a wonderful job capturing the tone and feel of Clover. Her performance brought this character to life and kept me wanting to listen so I could see how Clover hopefully grew. I don't think there's a better person to do this character - so great job!

Clover is death doula and her life revolves around death. Her parents died when she was young and she was raised by her grandfather. An outsider her entire life, she tends to not get too close to anyone because at least that way she can’t lose them.
One evening at a death cafe she runs into a man who will change her life forever by introducing her to his dying grandmother.
I thought this story was so sweet! In the beginning Clover was a very frustrating character because she kept everyone at arms length, but as she helps others work through their thoughts of death and processes her own grief you see her grow as a character.
This book is beautifully written and has some passages that I want to remember forever!
I received an eARC via NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press in exchange for an honest review.

The Collected Regrets of Clover was a feel-good novel taking on the uncomfortable subject of death. I thought this was a really unique novel that included a career choice (death doula) and social engagement (death cafe) that I was not aware existed. I liked that there was a little bit of romance without that being the center of attention in the story.

I felt like the main character, Clover, got in her own way too much. She seemed to some extent unrelatable which was disappointing considering her career choice. Overall, I would add this to a TBR list for someone looking for a unique contemporary fiction.

Thank you NetGalley for giving me the opportunity to read The Collected Regrets of Clover. Unfortunately, this is a DNF for me. This is very dull and depressing.

4.5 stars.
This book was comfy, cozy, emotional, quietly joyful and heartbreaking.
The collected regrets of clover starts a bit slow for me. I was unsure for about the first 30% but I couldn’t get through the last 30% fast enough.
Clover has been surround by death her entire life and in the process of others lives ending she’s forgotten to live through her own. Clovers growth through the books as she finally started building new relationships and living her life was so satisfying. This book was an easy read and has the kind of life advance you need to stick with you.

Even though this book is ostensibly about death, it is really about life and finding the passions that make it worthwhile. Clover is a death doula who helps those who are terminal accept their deaths and stays with them until the final moments if they wish. One would think this would be depressing, but Clover is an odd one, very reclusive and anti-social so this job suits her. She meets many fascinating people and actually these interactions are so good for her as they help her find a way out of her own "shell" as she begins to embrace new ideas and people! Heart-wrenching but so sweet and lovely!
Thanks to NetGalley for this ARC!

Thank you to NetGalley, St. Martin's Press and the author for an advanced digital copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.

Clover is one of the most quirky, endearing main characters I’ve come to know and love in my recent reads. She is a death doula - someone who helps those in the last stages of life to find comfort and peace with their transition. She has lost everyone that she has ever gotten close to and her guarded existence makes her quite the loner. As her clients confess their greatest regrets on their deathbeds, Clover starts to think back on her own life and how she can honor them by avoiding the same pitfalls and mistakes.

I adored this book so much that I was torn: I wanted to devour it and yet I wanted to savor each part so it wouldn’t end. The writing was beautiful and accessible - there were so many great quotes that really resonated with me. For a theme revolving around death, I found this book to be more hopeful and encouraging than depressing. The cast of characters were all so darling, I longed to be a part of them. I laughed. I cried. I loved. This book was everything and is definitely going to be touted as a new favorite.

I highly recommend this book for any fellow fiction girlie who craves a warm hug in the form of a novel.

This book was lovely. If you were a fan of Eleanor Oliphant or Amy Ashton this book is just the world you’re looking for. Clover was equal parts endearing and frustrating but her character growth was wonderful and I found myself crying right along with her.

The Collected Regrets of Clover was one of those books where I read the synopsis and it just appealed to me. It sounded unique and quite clever. I have to say, I was not disappointed. With a first sentence like the following, how can you not be intrigued and pulled in right away?

"The first time I watched someone die, I was five."

Clover is a woman in her 30's who is a death doula. A death doula you say? I had heard of a doula that helps with birth and after, but not the opposite. But having someone to be by you and guide you through the stages of death into what's next for the person dying and their family just made sense. Why hadn't I heard of one before? And where are these people because I think they could help people live more peacefully in the end

I loved the journey of Clover and how we got to see her from a young child and then how she grew up raised by her grandfather in a rent controlled apartment in NYC. It was obvious that she had a very strong connection with her grandfather and the few people he brought into her life, but we come into the story when it's just Clover, living a very closeted life with no close connections, helping people with deaths. Being constantly surrounded by death without much life has to weigh on a person. How will she live a life with no regrets if she is only living for the dying?

The Collected Regrets of Clover was a beautiful story with moments of humor, grief, life, love, frustration and major growth for a woman in her 30's. The cast of characters really rounded out the story and each person was brought into Clover's life with great intent. A chance meeting with a client brings her an unlikely companion that has her searching for a piece of the woman's past that ends up changing Clover's life in the most unexpected way. Even when it was difficult to like Clover and understand her reasonings for her actions, I fell for her a little bit more and more when other moments were uncovered. Her heart was huge, she just didn't know where to put everything she had been carrying around with her for the majority of her life.

"Grief is just love looking for a place to settle."

Regrets is a solid debut with a very believable character arc for Clover. It is a book that you will want to hold to your chest and sigh with a little piece of happiness when finishing it.
Definitely recommend and I am excited to read what Mikki Brammer writes next.

Thank you St Martins Press for this book! Clover is one of the most interesting characters I have read in a while, a death doula with such a resonant connection with death, such a respectful approach to those who need her most, that she is forgetting perhaps to see the living and life around her. I loved how this book gave such a thoughtful development of Clover with insights into her thoughts; Mikki Brammer shows thoughtful restraint and balance with voicing a character who is struggling socially, making her sympathetic and caring, a bit quirky perhaps, without making her hard to relate to. I was reminded of a favorite author, Laurie Frankel, and how she gives voice to different types of characters.
There is such a lovely story in here, with Clover finding herself at a crossroads, in a good way, where she can begin to see how much she offers many people, not just those nearing the end of life.

Grief is just love looking for a place to settle.

Synopsis:

Clover Brooks is a 36-year-old death doula living in NYC, whose job it is to provide comfort, support and a listening ear to the dying. Her interest in death began in kindergarten when her teacher collapsed and died in front of the class and was reinforced by her parents’ accidental deaths a year later. She’s not morbid, but rather sees death as a natural part of life that she can help people process in their final days. The only problem is that she herself seems to have forgotten to LIVE.

Raised by her now-deceased grandfather, she’s never had a romantic relationship or friendships with peers and only socializes with one of her grandfather’s friends named Leo. When a new uninhibited tenant named Sylvie moves into her building and a man named Sebastian hires her to care for his 91-year-old dying grandmother, Claudia, Clover’s world begins to open up. She’s used to being the one to teach others, but Sylvie, Sebastian and particularly Claudia, may just teach Clover a thing or two about living!

My Thoughts:

Mikki Brammer’s debut novel is beautifully written and has a thoughtful, almost philosophical feel to it. The blurb compares it to Matt Haig’s The Midnight Library, and I can see that. It addresses a topic that, frankly, most of us probably don’t want to think about or discuss much, yet ultimately draws the focus far more to the idea of living life fully. Yes, it addresses aspects of death and dying that may make people sensitive to that topic uncomfortable, but it also promotes the idea of appreciating your life and living it well! It was fun to see Clover’s world open up over the course of the story.

Speaking of Clover, she isn’t easy to like at times. She’s guarded and mistrustful due to a lifetime of being misunderstood, yet she’s also kind-hearted and caring towards those in her care, and the few people she’s willing to open her heart to. Her relationship with Claudia was genuinely touching, as were her interactions with 87-year-old Leo. Her budding friendship with Sylvie was mostly fun as well. I didn’t like Sebastian, but someone enters the story later who did win my heart! Ultimately, Clover’s character arc made my heart happy, and I can see why some compare her to Eleanor Oliphant.

Overall, it was a wonderful debut. Some parts dragged just a little and a couple characters’ death scenes felt a bit unrealistic - I just don’t believe they’d have that kind of clarity in their dying moments to impart all those bits of advice to Clover, but that said, the thoughts were still touching and brought tears to my eyes! I’ll definitely be watching for Brammer’s future books.

★★★★

“ Grief is just love looking for a place to settle.”

For a book that focuses on death and dying, I found myself laughing and smiling for Clover, our main character. She is a death doula who cares for the dying with grace and dignity. She can’t quite admit to herself that she surrounds herself with death so that she doesn’t have to focus on what’s right in front of her.

I recommend this book to anyone who has lost someone, as it has gems of wisdom on how to handle grief and the pain of losing those we love.

A Books Are Magical podcast episode featuring this novel will be released on May 9th.

Spotify link to our podcast:

https://open.spotify.com/show/6d2Y4FA6LRS0LxFHh9L8Z2?si=3HcfPxMJQWeLx7SRbVeyRA&dd=1

I feel like this is one of those books that sticks with you long after you read it. It's a reminder to live life to the fullest and enjoy life, so you have no regrets when your time comes.

Clover has an interesting career, a death doula. She provides support and sometimes companionship to people who are near the end of their lives. She first experienced death at age 5, when her kindergarten teacher died, and then at age 6 when her parents died on a trip to China. She then spent the rest of her childhood living with her grandfather. Clover is fascinated with death, and customs of different cultures related to death.

Clover is excellent at her job, but her social life is clearly lacking. She had traveled the world learning about death and other cultures. But when her grandfather died while she was away, she returned to live in their once shared apartment and strives to make sure others don't die alone. She is very introverted and a bit socially awkward.

Then Clover takes on a new client, Claudia. And I adored her. We watch Clover struggle a bit when she's pushed out of her comfort zone. But we see her grow so much as a person, finding friendship and possibly even romance.

This was an excellent debut and I look forward to more from this author.

Many thanks to NetGalley, St. Martin's Press and MacMillan Audio for an ARC and ALC in exchange for my honest review.